The Akatsuki Corner

Episode 4

The Adventures of Sharkman and Sharingan Boy

The camera zooms in on the stage, showing a brand new high stone table, comfy red bar chairs and a coffee machine. Itachi and Kisame sit in the two center chairs, Kisame blowing bubbles in his water and Itachi glaring at him.

" You are so immature."

The blue man shrugs, pulling back, " Where is Deidara?"

Itachi sets his cheek in his hand and grumbles, " How the hell should I know? He's always late. I swear, he's worse than Kakashi."

" No one is worse than Kakashi when It comes to being late for something." Kisame snorted, dumping his water onto the floor, then motioning for a (very irritated)stagehand to come clean it up and refill it for him. He looks back at the entrance door as a loud crash makes the stage shake.

Deidara stumbles through the door, fishnet shirt ripped in several places and missing the left leg of his pants. He blows a strand of hair out of his face before yelping as Tobi hops in after him. The orange masked man grabs onto the end of Deidara's ponytail as pulls him back as he tries to escape. Tobi turns his eye to the camera, " Hi! Welcome to the Akatsuki Corner!"

The camera turns to the large screen behind Itachi and Kisame, zooming in as the large red screen starts flashing with pictures. 'Upside Down' by A* Teens plays as flashes of Zetsu arranging flowers, Tobi and Konan singing karaoke, Kisame playing with the fish in a pond as Itachi reads a book beside him and Deidara playing dress up with Sasori's dolls, go across the screen.

It zooms out, back onto the two partners seated at the stone table. Kisame's water has been refilled and Itachi's papers are finally orgainzed. (When weren't they?).

" So today-" Kisame began, Dun dun dun dun. He blinks, turning in his seat to look up at the speakers. Nothing. " So, as I was-" Dun dun dun dun. His brow furrows glancing at Itachi, who's looking at him impatiently. " On today's to-do-" Dun dun dun dun. A growl escapes, " What the hell-" Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun whoosh whoosh whoosh. He scowls at Itachi, who's starting to glare at him.

What the hell?!

" Are you you going to do this or not?" Itachi hisses, " I don't have all day."

" But I can't-" Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. Kisame's fists hit the table, shattering the glasses and causing Itachi to fall back out of his chair, hitting the floor with a loud thud. " AH! Itachi-san-" Dun dun dun dun dun. He puts his hands on his hips, glaring at a hysterically laughing audience, then at Angel, who's snickering behind the camera man. " Not funny!"

He helps Itachi back up, lucky to still be alive despite the younger mans burning glare and swatting thin hands. " Don't touch me."

" Are you hurt?" Kisame asks, peering at the back of the Uchiha's head.

" I'm S-class criminal. Of course I'm okay!" Itachi snarls, shoving the blue man back into his seat before taking his own.

" Forgive me for caring." Kisame mumbles, looking back down at the papers. " Okay, so first on our agenda today-" Dun dun dun dun. " ANGEL!"

Itachi snatches the papers from him, reorganizing them again and taking in a deep breath. " We're going to show you something that may shock you all." He went on in a monotone voice(Insert fainting fangirlish sighs here), black eyes scanning the paper. " Pein got this on tape last Monday, unbeknown-est to the two idiots who were doing it. He labeled it 'a miracle. It's about time we got one.' then, ten minutes later, half of the base was blown up."

He picked up a small remote sitting between him and Kisame, picked it up and pressed a button. On the screen, was a video of Deidara and Tobi both with pink microphones, dancing around the black-haired man's room. Tobi dressed up like a ninja and Deidara all decked out in purple fishnet and black jeans. They were dancing around, both singing at the top of their lungs, looping arms every once and a while, shaking thier rears to the camera(which they had no clue was there -somewhere Zetsu coughs-).

Kisame lifted an eyebrow, turning to his partner and mouthing the silent 'what the hell was that?' so he didn't have to speak. And Itachi, being the awesome lip reader that he wasn't, squinted at his partner's lips, trying to sound out the words.

" Neeee. Does Itachi-kun want to kiss Kisame?" Tobi popped up behind them, head tilted to the side and peering down at them with a creepy smile.

They scowled, " Are you high?"

" Nope!" Tobi smiled, " But I thought you two should see this." He whipped out a pink laptop, from out of nowhere mind you, and set it between Kisame and Itachi. A camera man rushes on stage, perching a camera behind the three men, zooming in on the screen.

On the small screen was what looked to be a short story. Itachi leaned forward, eyes narrowing to try and make out the words.

It was silent, except for the soft patter of rain against the roof of the hideout. Soon, as the temperature got lower, it would be snowing. Kisame sat in front of the fire, staring at the flames and wishing he could go sit in the middle of the storm outside. He would, except the man seated across from him, was glaring at the fire, trying to stop his teeth from chattering.

" Are you cold, Itachi-san?"

" No."

" What is the point of this?" Itachi growled, put Tobi put a hand on his head and turned it back to the screen, ignoring the grunt of displeasure from the sharigan user.

Liar, Kisame thought, rolling his eyes in his head and returning to stare at the fire. It grew quiet again, the rain stopping. He looked up to see small white flurries drifting down past the frosted glass. A smile drifted over his lips.

He jerked slightly as he felt something cool press fluidly against his side. Blue-gray eyes drifted down, blinking at the expanse of black hair. His expression softens as the smaller male tries to get closer to the warmth. Kisame chuckles, ignoring the stiffing of his partner's body as he opened his coat and pulled the man beneath it.

A small sigh escaped as the younger male burrowed into his side, the cold drifting away from his body. Kisame smiled, wrapping his arm around the now sleeping man, staring at the fire.

It was a start, he supposed.

" That's it?" Itachi muttered, head tilting and looking at his blue-haired partner. " We do that already, what's so bad about..."

Tobi clicked a few buttons, scrolled down and pointed at the screen again.

(Caution: Short yaoi alert!)

It was so hot. Short, blunt nails scraping over his blue skin. That pale, dark-haired angel writhing beneath him, mouth open and panting, obsidian eyes half-lidded and glossed over in pleasure. It was a sight any human being would revel in.

He was pushing inside him, whispered groans coming from both men. His teeth left marks along pretty cream skin, bruises on that graceful neck and harsh, passionate kisses on pink, full lips.

Kisame gulped, skin prickling at that awareness that something was about to blow up. He turned his head slowly, gasping as Itachi's shoulder's shook, the sharingan spinning in his eyes. " Now, Itachi-san, it's just a story-" Dun dun dun dun.

The studio went up in flames.

CaramelDansen by Caramell plays as the credits roll. (and Kisame tries to calm Itachi down)

Producer:

Bloodredangel808

Cast:

Itachi Uchiha

Kisame H.

Deidara

Tobi (reads fanfictions!)

Crew:

The minions of my mind.

Topics of Discussion by:

XxValentinesxXxBulletxX

Tentenrules4ever ( Your dedication is 'Tobi's Song' which can be found in my story list on my profile!)

A/N: Wow, This one was fun to make. I found a video of Deidara and Tobi doing the 'CaramelDansen dance' So......go looking it up on youtube. 'Caramelldansen - Deidara and Tobi' Type that in and you'll find it!

Plus, I want to do a Christmas episode, so...SEND in you ideas! I can't wait to hear them. Make sure they're full of Christmas spirit!

Blessed Be,

Angel