Author's note: Yeah, changed summary a bit. Never liked the old one much.

Warning! A LOT of [emotional] fluff ahead! Nothing quite graphic… yet, although I'd rate it T for safety. Just in case :))

Anyway, dig in!

Chapter 6

Dean was lying flat on the back on a narrow single bed, more a cot by the looks of it, which didn't seem to be as comfortable as Bela's double one. Besides, it looked strangely out of place in the room that definitely wasn't a bedroom. A study maybe, or something like that, if two massive bookshelves along one of the walls were any indication.

Bela paused in the doorway – needed a moment or two to resist an urge to flee so that she could pretend that she didn't come here at all – and then made her way in. Just to make sure he was fine, nothing more than that, she told herself. Probably the lamest excuse she could have ever come up with but all the same it sounded better than admitting her own fear and anxiety.

Dean wasn't asleep. In the back of her mind Bela knew he wouldn't be so it wasn't really surprising. She could practically feel it. Feel him watching her slow approach. His face stayed in the shadow and she couldn't see it whereas she was lit from head to toe with the moonlight streaming through small window, which made her feel a tad uncomfortable. A wish to flee was back, but a wish to stay was stronger, now that she made it this far anyway.

He moved slightly aside, closer to the wall when she came up to make some room for her. Bela lowered herself slowly onto the very edge of the cot, somewhere near Dean's hip, half-turned to him, one leg tucked underneath her butt. Felt the warmth of his body even without actual touch.

Walking down the corridor Bela feared not to find him here. Couldn't help but wonder what she'd do if he told her to get out, or use this shoot first, ask questions later thing. But he was here, and he didn't asked her to leave, and he didn't have a gun pointed at her, and what was the most important – it had been about a minute since she came in and they weren't shouting at each other yet. Bela took it as a good sign. Hoped it wasn't a trick or something.

"I couldn't sleep," she said quietly, barely above whisper. Hoped it sounded like offering a peace – the way she wanted it to sound, like I couldn't sleep actually meant I don't want to fight. Can we not, please? – and not like a whine or complaint. Hoped it didn't sound too hysterical or panicky either because the truth was she was scared like hell, and tired of so many things, like running away, or denying the obvious, and Dean Winchester was probably the only person in the whole wide world who came anywhere close to understanding her.

The last thought made Bela wonder if he was feeling something like that about her, too.

She looked down at her hands clenched on her lap, and then into the darkness where his face was supposed to be. Wanted to see him so bad. Feeling wasn't enough, apparently.

Dean grunted something under his breath, a mixture of a snort and a scoff, in acknowledgement of hearing her. He was ready for a truce too, now that several hours had passed and the storm inside of his head caused by their fight and the whole coming-back-to-life thing had ebbed. Staring aimlessly at the ceiling helped him to cool down and think things through. Not that it helped in making these things more clear, there were still too many questions left… but he was planning on offering a truce himself nonetheless. And the fact that she did it first pleased him more than he was ready to admit even to himself. Which was probably one of the most embarrassing things he'd ever felt in life.

"Where are Sam and Bobby?" Bela asked after a while, out of wish to say something and finally end the silence.

It wasn't uncomfortable or uneasy – not really – but without some kind of contact she started feeling that he was slipping away. Never thought that here and yet so far could be so real. And, okay, it was a stupid thing to ask because, truth be told, right at the moment Bela couldn't care less for whereabouts of Dean's brother and Bobby but it was the best thing that came to her mind. What else could she ask? How was the weather in hell when you were leaving? Gee!

"Since when do you need them around to have a good sleep?" Dean smirked.

And, oh, it was a very bad idea. Generally, bantering was okay. It was safe, a familiar territory if you please, and practically it was the way of their communication. Generally, Bela never minded exchanging sarcastic shots with Dean Winchester. But not now. Not when she was an emotional mess. It irked her for no good reason, made her cringe, even past the relief of hearing his voice at last. Only God knew what she expected when she came to his room in the middle of the night, but whatever it was, it wasn't this.

"Go to hell!" She anything but snapped in annoyance, fully intended to leave right away. Bad wording, okay, and she didn't mean it, not literary, but c'mon! It was a mistake to come here, a very big mistake.

Dean caught her by the arm when Bela made an attempt to stand up though, forced her to stay sitting. "Wait. Sorry," in a whoosh of breath as if it was something embarrassing to say. Or maybe he wasn't sure whether he wanted her to hear him, Bela thought. "Don't go," which sounded to her better than anything that he ever had said to her before. And then, after a pause, "Wasn't quite sleepy myself," like an apology.

Of course! How could he? How could anyone? Only hours away from… oh, she couldn't even identify it in her head.

Dean's hand lingered on her arm a little longer than necessary. Technically speaking he could have let it go on instant – Bela wondered if asking her to stay was some kind of impulse which he had no idea what to do with now, and she even anticipated him to jerk his hand away once he realized what he did, what he said – but he didn't causing her to catch her breath and swallow hard. Her stomach flopped violently. She heard him catch his too at the sound of sharp intake of hers, and still he wasn't keen on leaving. Instead, his fingers slipped down her wrist, slowly, like a cautious retreat, leaving a burning trail on her skin.

Bela looked down at her hand seriously expecting it to glow in the dark. Not that there was anything left in the world that could have surprised her anyway.

Made another attempt to see his face in the blackness trying to decipher that mixed signal in her mind, which didn't seem to really work one way or another now that her aforementioned mind was on fire for at least one million of reasons. The touch didn't feel scared exactly, but confused – yes, and maybe lonely, too. Oh, Lord, it was so damn easy to misinterpret things, see them the way she wanted to see them. The way she needed to see them.

"I didn't mean it, Dean," she breathed out in a now or never way.

"What?"

There was no need to see him – as much as she'd like to – to feel that he blinked pretty dumbly as if she said something extremely stupid in the middle of an extremely serious and meaningful conversation. Well, the good thing was that at least she wasn't alone in this feeling-stupid train. And the bad thing was that she didn't feel like repeating the things that were uncomfortable to say even once.

"When I said I'd send you back to hell if I could…" Bela paused and took a breath when it suddenly turned out that there was no air left in her lungs. It didn't seem to help much though. "I didn't mean it. Didn't mean it to sound like this." Another pause. "I would never do it."

"Is that a threat?" Dean scoffed, and probably rolled his eyes. At least Bela didn't have problems with imagining it. And then in entirely another voice, "So you… you really don't know how you did it, Bela?" Curiously, she noted, good-naturedly even, without accusation or suspicion. So, he wasn't mad at her or something, she figured. He didn't sound insulting, and she dared to take it like they weren't exactly enemies at the moment. Or anymore, generally.

"No," she shook her head. And seriously, if she were getting paid every time she had to answer that question, she'd probably have a good start capital for her new life by now. She wanted to add that she wasn't even sure that she did anything – because, hey, they couldn't prove it somehow, right? - but even thinking about getting into her own half-guesses all over again made her feel sick. Not now. "Bobby said it has something to do with my wishing, which is… oh, so crazy!" She added with a short and nervous laugh.

"And you can… you know, bring back anyone?"

There was something more than simple curiosity behind the question, which made Bela bite a quick reply – an ironic one – that nearly slipped out of her mouth. She could have sworn that he even held his breath in anticipation of an answer. Did he miss the part about crazy?

"I don't know, Dean," she said in a small voice fully aware of his disappointment. He didn't sigh or anything, but it was so tangible that she felt it anyway. "I… have to really want it. Something like that. Which, okay, I admit could have worked with me. But you? Ruins the whole theory." Bela snorted but lightly enough so that he'd get that she was teasing, bringing them back to where the communication was easy.

Dean chuckled quietly. "Oh, now we know about your little secret desires, Bela," in the exact same tone that she used.

The sound of his deep voice made her tingle. Made her lose her breath even, which was so damn untimely, really. One more think to think – read worry – about. Oh, like she didn't have enough of them already! Bela blamed it on… on something – anything! – that didn't have to do with feelings or other ridiculous crap.

In a sudden rush of confidence she wanted to ask who he wanted to bring back if he could. Wanted to know something about him that no files contained and no money could buy. Parents, she guessed. Knew that their death was far from peaceful and painless. Or maybe someone else from the past. Someone she didn't know about. Someone he probably deeply cared for. Made her realize once again how little she knew about him. Almost nothing. But then… did she want to know? Did she want to bring him through this if there was hardly any hope? If it was only going to cause more pain. Bela wasn't sure she could stand listening to his confessions and then say – it was a nice story but, sorry, I can't do anything about it. Didn't want to be mean or pathetic.

Her hair was clumped into a tail by an elastic band. Dean reached his hand out when she least expected it and pulled it off letting her hair down, threw it unceremoniously somewhere into the darkness. His fingers ran gently through soft curls.

"I like it better this way," he said, and whatever it meant there was a smile in his voice.

Bela shook her head to let her hair settle.

Too much affection. Too much something she wasn't ready for. And it was right about time to scram, and everything inside of her screamed for it, but she didn't move. Nothing moved except for her heart that started a riotous dance in her chest. She shifted on the place, out of wish to make sure that she still belonged to herself more than anything, to make sure that his hypnotizing gaze didn't paralyze her. The gaze she couldn't even see.

"I swear to God I have no idea what is it, Dean, or why it happened to me. Or what am I supposed to do about it now," she dropped her eyes and felt that her lips curved into a bitter smile on the will of their own. "It doesn't feel comfortable to know that I turned into some psychic freak, you see."

"Welcome to my world, Bela," he sighed.

She whipped her head round, peered into the darkness wishing like hell for a bit of light. Groped around the blanket but his hand was gone.

"What do you mean?"

"Never mind," his chuckle was soft, and bitter too.

His fingers brushed softly against her wrist again sending electric charges through her body.

"Dean…" Bela swallowed hard feeling that her mouth suddenly went dry and her throat clogged.

No, this was right about time to get out of here! She was a total mess and she needed to pull herself together. On her own. No witnesses required, thank you! Couldn't let herself fall apart in front of Dean. Couldn't be horrible enough to make him deal with a hurricane named nervous breakdown of Bela Talbot. What was she thinking when she came here? Well, nothing but… The room was too small, and Dean was too close – closer than she ever though he could be, and she was a step away from actually hyperventilating. And what? Crying? Oh, God!

She wanted to get to her feet and run out of the room, out of the house, as far as she only could. But instead she let him pull her down to him with the only thought throbbing in her mind – the cot was too narrow for the two of them. But then Dean was all around her wiping all thoughts out of her mind. His arms were holding her firmly, and Bela could feel the heat of his chest against her back through thin fabric of their clothes. His breath was tickling her ear, and it felt so safe, so secure, so strangely right that she inched surreptitiously backwards into the warmth of his embrace, literary making Dean tighten his grip on her.

And it wasn't an advance or something like that. Not even anywhere close. It was a desperate need to end this everlasting loneliness that both of them lived in for so long. Just for now, for this time only. For the moment that seemed to float in time. None of them dared to hope for something else. And Bela had no idea which of them needed it more. Didn't want to think about it either. He was so close that she could practically feel his heartbeat. Or maybe she only imagined it because she needed to feel it. Slow and steady, unlike hers, fast and uneven.

She took a sharp, convulsive breath, and Dean responded to it with a soft sigh of his own, so unexpectedly perceptive. She didn't want him to see her like this. Didn't even think she could be like this because up to this moment Bela seriously thought that she was doing fine with keeping her cool and pretending that it was nothing more than a simple friendly visit, if you please. The thought nearly made her laugh out loud. Apparently she was wrong.

His hand ran up and down her arm in a soothing gesture, gentle and feather light.

"It's sorta cool, ya know," Dean whispered right into her ear.

"What?"

"Well, that… thing that you can do. Like, really cool."

"Oh, God!" The wish to laugh hysterically was back. "I have no idea how to live with it… Wanna trade places, Dean? No, seriously, I would really appreciate it if you helped me to get rid of this headache."

"Last time I checked, that headache of yours was pretty handy," he objected.

"Don't take it personally, but last time I checked it nearly killed me," Bela grouched, strangely relieved by the fact that she was capable of something but whining.

"Mighta liked being a damsel in distress for a change," he chuckled into her hair.

Bela couldn't resist a small smile. "Enjoyed the show?" She asked coquettishly.

"Definitely."

Perhaps she was too tired for straight and intelligent thinking. Perhaps it was the warmth of Dean's body that eased the tension inside of her and lulled Bela in some kind of half-daze, and created that strange moment of closeness. Or maybe it was just darkness that suddenly seemed so appropriate for heart-to-heart conversations and sharing secrets as if talking in low voices when they barely saw each other could actually change things. Whatever it was, Bela blamed this moment on it entirely.

"Dean? Do you remember anything from there?" She asked barely audibly. "Do you remember… anything?"

The pause was long. Bela listened to his deep breath – could feel it on her neck. Didn't miss the moment when he strained himself, and went completely still too, cursing herself mentally for not biting her tongue. Realized somewhat belatedly that she'd probably pitch off the bloody cot if Dean pulled back. And okay, it wasn't falling to the floor that bothered her most, although the prospect didn't look tempting. She didn't want him to pull away, one way or another, generally. Didn't want his guards up again. Didn't want to cause any more pain than she'd already caused. Didn't want to stay alone once again.

But he didn't pull back, to her surprise. "I… I don't know," he said at last, obviously puzzled. "Guess I have to figure it out to myself." The voice was slightly annoyed but it didn't sound like he was annoyed with her. Probably it was the fact that he couldn't get a straight answer to his question straightway that pissed him off, Bela supposed. "Do you?" In a whoosh of breath, so quiet that she nearly missed it, consumed with her own thoughts.

She tried to shrug, which was an automatic gesture and hardly worked with her being clutched so tight that even breathing was a matter of luck. And, God help her, she enjoyed every moment of it. "Not like this," Bela confessed. "I have no idea if it has something to do with being there… but I had a dream. A nightmare actually… Twice. It was so terrible, so awfully real…" She trailed off. New territory, and probably she was going too far. Wasn't planning to be so open, didn't mean to reveal too much. But then again, it might be nothing, right? "I don't remember it. Not really. But both times I woke up in cold sweat as if… as if…"

It wasn't the whole truth though, Bela thought sourly. She did remember some things but they were too terrible to be spoken about. Besides, she was almost sure they were not real because she saw him, the one who caused the whole mess a long time ago, and chances were it was just an ordinary nightmare, one of those that she was having in the past all the time, until she learned to block them out of her mind. Well, on the other hand, it wouldn't be surprising if it was a part of her hell in actual hell because what would be worse than living through her worst memories over and over again for the whole eternity?

"I don't know, Dean," she breathed out in what sounded like an extremely miserable voice. Leaned into the touch of his fingers when he brushed hair from her cheek and looped them around her ear. "Can't get rid of the feeling that it is just a dream. Too good to be real." And she wasn't sure if she was talking about living again in general or about this particular moment. "Aside from the part where I don't get anything… I'm alive." Her voice dropped even lower. "Do you think it can be a dream?"

"Whose?" He asked curiously.

"Mine. Yours. Ours." A pause. "Sam's." Bela giggled despite herself. Heard Dean giggle, too. "No, mine definitely. If it was yours or Sam's, I'd be log fed to alligators."

"Aw, come on! We're not that cruel!" He protested, offended. "Alligators are living creatures after all. And we're sorta for green peace."

Bela made an attempt to elbow him into whatever she could reach which only ended in a tighter embrace. Dean laughed softly and nuzzled into her hair. "Whatever it is, it feels too damn real to be some friggin' dream," he mumbled, and she knew on an instant that it was really something.

She turned her head – wanted to see him so bad! – and saw nothing. Too dark, too… But his lips were there, soft and warm, kissing her slowly, gently, like tasting her. Dean traced the outline of her mouth and deepened the kiss when Bela parted her lips on a sigh. His fingers slid down her cheek, and then trailed along her arm, and ended up on her stomach burning a stripe of bare skin between the waistband of her sweatpants and the hem of her t-shirt. She angled for more of his touch; realized in the back of her mind that pitching off the cot would be nothing compared to wringing her neck and shifted to make their position more comfortable for both of them.

And then panic came, strong and overwhelming, rushing through her in huge waves burying Bela with half-formed realizations. She didn't mean it to end like this, didn't come here for this. And as much as she didn't mind something like this to happen generally, Bela wasn't sure at the moment that she was capable of dealing with it, or with the consequences.

But before she had time to do anything about it, Dean's hand was gone all of a sudden, and his lips, too, and Bela anything but gasped in disappointment at the lack of contact. He rested his forehead against hers pushing his fingers through her hair giving them both time to take a breath, cope… somehow.

"Dean…"

"It's okay," he whispered like he actually read her mind or something.

It struck Bela as the most terrifying thought ever. She'd rather Dean stayed as far from what she was thinking about as possible. There were too many things on her mind which she had serious problems with admitting even to herself, not to mention someone… who these things referred to, and… Oh, too complicated.

"Bad timing, don't you think?" She whispered back with regret, closed her eyes not at all sure by the second that they made a right decision.

"As good as any other," he objected, his fingers toying with her curls.

Bela reached her hand out, groped for his face wishing she could look in his eyes. Just one look would be enough, only to be sure that he was real because she was having this dream so often that she started confusing dreams with reality. Brushed her hand through his short hair. "How could we let it go this far?"

"Guess we liked the process too much," he offered helpfully.

And maybe it was the best way to ruin the moment – and probably even get herself kicked out of this room, but… "It wasn't about money, Dean."

"What?"

His movements stilled. There was no need to see him to feel his confusion.

"My deal," she breathed out. Doing right things for once, she reminded herself. There was no turning back now that she'd come this far anyway but it didn't mean that it was easy. "It wasn't about money." Wanted to add that it wasn't even anywhere close to money, that she didn't even know she was making the deal because – come on! – little girls with glowing red eyes? She thought it was a trick of light or something. Wanted so much to explain everything, but her tongue had gone numb in her mouth.

"What it was about then?" Dean asked in strained voice. Waited intensely for her answer like it was something that he needed to know more than anything.

But Bela only turned away from him and shook her head into the pillow. "I can't," muffled and unbearably high-pitched. She bit her lower lip and shut her eyes so tight that it started to hurt, fought to ease that tight knot in her chest. Couldn't do it. Couldn't bring herself to voice it. And couldn't let it stay the way it was either. Had to step on her pride for once.

Although, okay, she wasn't so sure that opening up to someone was the right thing, not really. Didn't want to seem weak or vulnerable, or something else that she generally wasn't, at least in the other people's eyes. But it was killing her to know that Dean might be thinking that she was someone who she wasn't. And then again – consequences… One confession could lead to another, could make her say something stupid, like that he was on her mind ever since they met first. That she cared. Sort of. That she needed him. In a way. That it was nice just to know that he was alive. That he was the one allowed to see the side of her that she kept locked for everyone else. That he meant.

Too many things to deal with at once.

The silence hung think in the air for what seemed like forever. Even breathing felt oddly awkward and not quite right.

And then Dean pulled her close once again, buried his face into her hair and sighed soundly. His hand found hers lying on the pillow near Bela's face and covered it, squeezed it slightly for a moment and let go, but didn't leave.

"It's going to be all right, Bela," he murmured tickling her neck with his breath. "Swear to God, everything's going to be all right eventually."

And she tried to believe that he was telling the truth. Needed so badly to believe. Tried to pretend that it wasn't the biggest lie in her life because from where she was standing all right was far too optimistic. She dragged herself out of hell, for God's sake! She dragged Dean Winchester out of hell without even knowing how. Even thinking about it was making Bela uncomfortable. But this blank all right was fine for now. None of them could do anything about it anyway.

So, she let herself relax and snuggle back into his hug. Sighed sleepily, feeling that her mind started drifting away… The cot obviously wasn't wide enough for the two of them, nor was it really comfortable but Bela was okay with the thought of spending the rest of the night on it.

To be continued…

PS Here is a piece of self-promotion, my new vid :)) It's not story-related but it just happened that I finished it together with this chapter. So, in case you're interested http:// www. youtube. com/watch?v=Yw9Y3mxtK7U on YouTube *I know that links work bad here.