Chapter Three
(New Skaro)
"Doctor, you do know that one of these days the Daleks are gonna catch on to you?" Rose said.
She was standing at the TARDIS's front door holding a digital camera in her hands and staring at the Doctor, who was planning yet another prank on the Daleks.
"Nah, the Daleks won't catch on. They're not that smart," the Doctor said.
"How do you know?"
The Doctor stared at her, amazed she would ask such a question.
"Because I'm the smartest being in the universe," he said, as if that were completely obvious.
Rose rolled her eyes.
"Oh yeah, keep forgetting that."
The Doctor ruffled her hair.
"Silly ape," he said. "Always has to be reminded of my superiority."
"Yeah, yeah, just get in position, so I can take the bloody picture."
The Doctor smiled and opened the front door. He checked around, and when the coast was clear, stepped outside.
"Okay, just snap this picture of me and then hurry inside and print it up," he said. "I'm anxious to see what will happen."
Rose nodded. She stood in front of the Doctor and held the camera up. She looked through the view screen and frowned when the Doctor made a face and flipped the camera off.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"This'll make the dumb Dalek really mad."
Rose shrugged.
"Whatever," she said, taking the picture.
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The Doctor peeked around the wall and saw another sleeping Dalek sentry.
"Blimey, asleep again?" the Doctor said. "They need to get better sentries."
He grinned, as he crept up on the sentry. He paused for a moment behind him and listened to the soft snoring before proceeding around to the front. Holding his laughter in, he reached up and taped the picture of himself over the Dalek's eye. He waited a moment, and then, jumped up and slammed his hand down on its head.
"BOOGA BOOGA BOO, I SEE YOU!"
He ran behind the Dalek, as it woke up.
"IT IS THE DOC-TOR! EX-TER-MIN-ATE!"
"Take your best shot, Dalek!" the Doctor said.
He giggled when the Dalek shot at the air in front of him.
"YOU WILL DIE, DOC-TOR!" the Dalek said.
"Missed me!" the Doctor said.
"NO, THAT IS IM-POSS-I-BLE! HOW DID I MISS? THE DOC-TOR IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!"
"Try again, chrome dome, maybe you'll get lucky this time!"
"DIE, DOC-TOR!"
The Dalek fired his laser.
"NO, THAT IS IM-POSS-I-BLE, YOU ARE NOT DEAD!" the Dalek said.
He fired again.
"WHY WON'T YOU DIE, DOC-TOR?" the Dalek said.
He moved forward and fired again, and again, and again.
"DAMN IT! DIE, DOC-TOR!"
The Doctor giggled, as the Dalek moved away from him firing his laser all over the place.
"I WILL HAVE THE HONOR OF KILLING OUR GREATEST ENEMY!" he said, as he fired his laser up, and down, and left, and right. "YOU WILL DIE, DOC-TOR!"
"I doubt it," the Doctor replied.
He giggled while he watched the Dalek move away from the city firing in every direction. Whistling, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked back to the TARDIS.
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(2 hours later)
"OKAY, REX, I AM HERE TO RELIEVE…"
The Dalek sentry paused at the entrance to the city and looked at his friend who was gliding all over the countryside cursing loudly and firing his laser in every direction he could think of.
"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS THIS?" the sentry said, gliding off after him.
"I WILL KILL YOU, DOC-TOR!" Rex said. "YOU WILL DIE! I SWEAR I WILL KILL YOU! STOP FLIP-PING ME OFF, YOU WANK-ER! DIE, DIE, DIE!"
The sentry glided up beside him.
"REX," he said, taking care to avoid the stray laser blasts.
"WHY WON'T YOU DIE?"
"REX!"
"NOT NOW, PETE, I AM KILL-ING THE DOC-TOR!" Rex said.
Pete sighed.
"REX, STOP!"
"NEVER, I WILL NOT REST UNTIL I KILL THE DOC-TOR!"
"REX!"
Rex stopped firing.
"WHAT DO YOU WANT, PETE? I AM BUSY KILLING THE DOC-TOR. I MUST DESTROY HIM BE-FORE HE GETS AWAY!"
Pete sighed, as he glided around the front. Using his plunger, he sucked the picture off Rex's eye and showed it to him.
Rex stared at it and then looked all around him.
"WHERE IS THE DOC-TOR?" Rex said.
"HE IS RIGHT HERE, YOU IDIOT. YOU WERE FIRING AT A PHO-TO-GRAPH."
Rex looked at the picture and then looked Pete in the eye.
"OH, I WAS? I…THOUGHT….IT WAS THE DOC-TOR!"
He looked around at the countryside. The landscape was charred and on fire. He looked back at Pete.
"THIS ISN'T GOING ON MY OFFICIAL RECORD IS IT?" he said.
Pete stared at him for a moment and then shook his head.
"IT'S DALEKS LIKE YOU THAT MAKE ME QUESTION OUR SUPREMACY!" he said.
He glided back to the entrance wondering how he could contact the Doctor, so he could arrange for him to exterminate Rex.