-Chapter Two-

"Another Time"

It was happening again, was all I could think as I walked towards Brad and Charlie. They both had their hands on their hips and were glaring at each other. I could hear the last of what Charlie was saying. "You wouldn't be nowhere if it wasn't for daddy's last name and daddy's money. All you are is a spoiled brat with a big bank account."

Brad leaned forward, that darkness in his eyes that always hurt me. "Which is far more than what you've got. All you've got is everyone around here's pity because you have maybe a few years left of your life. Back down, old man, and let the professionals do their job."

Charlie was about to something when I intervened. "Brad." My voice was sharp and he snapped his head towards me. "What are you guys doing?"

"The kid here thinks he's going to be taking Pride for a breeze tomorrow. He already had his breeze yesterday. Anymore will only tire him out and you can't bring a tired horse into the Derby and expect him to win." Charlie's eyes were slit with anger and I could tell he was trying hard to control himself.

"Brad," I said, looking over to my husband who was looking at me expectantly. "I think that maybe Charlie's right. You want to keep Pride fresh and ready to face anything for the Derby. He's up against stiff competition. Maybe we should keep the works light just to limber him up."

Those dark blue eyes slit into a glare and he I saw him clench his fist before stalking off in the opposite direction. I let out a deep breath and closed my eyes, attempting to rub away the headache. "Why can't the two of you just get along?" I said to Charlie.

The old man shrugged. "Because the kid refuses to grow up." his blue eyes met mine as he took a step towards me. "You'll realize one of these days that you made a mistake, Ashleigh. But by then, you won't be able to take it back." He brushed past me and I watched him go. I looked over my other shoulder and watched my husband's retreating back.

Everyone thought I was crazy for marrying Brad and maybe I was. Maybe they were right and I was making a mistake but I knew that I loved him. And if you weren't willing to take risks for someone you love… then why bother?

I found Brad later behind one of the barns leaning against it and smoking a cigarette. I hadn't known he smoked so the sight surprised me. What hurt was that he was my husband and I hadn't known this about him. Times like these made me feel so awkward and unsteady. I slid up next to him and stare straight ahead. "So, how long are you going to keep taking everyone else's side?" He asked as he took another drag.

"I wasn't taking Charlie's side, I was standing up for what I thought was best for Pride." I turned to look at him but he still wouldn't look at me. "Brad, if you wanted someone who was going to cave to your every thought, need, and demand then you married the wrong woman." I held up my left hand. "If that's the kind of girl you wanted then you never should have gave me this."

He blew out smoke and dropped his head down. "I felt like a fool out there. My own wife wouldn't even stand by me."

Another time, I would have told him that he was a fool. I would have used this opportunity to really stick it to him. Another day, I would have held my head high and laughed at his expense. Another day, yes but now, as I stood next to him as his wife…I couldn't. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and kissed his neck gently. "I love you."

He pulled away from me, his blue eyes burning holes into my hazel ones. "I know you do, Ash but I don't know if love is enough."

"What are you trying to tell me?" Suddenly, I felt hot and cold all over. I could just picture it splashed all over the newspaper "Ashleigh Griffen's failed marriage." I could just imagine everyone telling me that I'd been stupid to fall for Brad, stupid to believe that he actually loved me.

He sighed and walked towards me, pressing his forehead on mine, resting his hand gently on the back of my neck. "I don't know, Ash. I really don't know."

I put my hands on either side of his face and forced him to look into my eyes. "All I hear from everyone is how crazy I am to think that you and I could actually make a relationship work. That I'm insane for thinking that you could actually love me and that we can actually have a life together. I know that we drive each other crazy ninety-nine percent of the time but that doesn't mean that I don't love you and that this isn't meant to be. It just means it's going to be a lot more work. I'm up for it if you are."

He kissed my forehead gently but pulled away. "See if Samantha and the old man are ready to go. If we don't leave now we'll be late."

And all I could was watch him walk away from me. I could feel tears swell in my eyes as I wondered if it was as worth it for him as it was for me.

I had just finished my shower and was sitting on our bed in my pajamas when he walked in. He didn't say anything to me, he just drug in the top drawer for a pair of sweat pants and slipped into them, leaving his clothes a pile on the floor. I rubbed lotion on my arms and legs as I watched him, my hazel eyes carefully following his every movement. "What?" he finally said, looking irritated.

"Just trying to figure out when your going to calm down and tell me what's really bothering you." I said, finally taking my gaze from him as I walked to the vanity where I removed my wedding ring and put in the same velvet box that Brad had given me when he proposed.

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?" He said and when I looked at him his face was red with anger.

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "Okay, now your being mad just to be mad. Let's just go to bed and we'll talk about it in the morning." I tried to crawl beneath the sheets but he grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him.

"We'll talk about it now." he said through gritted teeth and my gaze turned to steel as I jerked away from him.

"When you decide just what it was that you want from me, we'll talk until then, I have nothing to say to you." He brought me back to him again but this time his touch was gentler and his gaze was just tired.

"You know what I want from you." he said, almost quietly. "I just want you as my wife."

"Didn't seem like it today." I said and swore to myself that I wouldn't cry but it never worked. "Brad, how could you say such hurtful things? I honestly thought you were going to ask me for a divorce." Another time he might have made a joke but he now saw the tears in my eyes and pulled me towards him, whispering words I couldn't understand in my ear.

"I love you, Ashleigh and I would never ask you for a divorce. We can do this." He said before he covered his lips with mine. And once again, he made me believe. "I love you. I don't even know how to say it to you anymore because you never want to believe me."

"How about the way that you show it, Brad? You use any excuse to get angry with me. We aren't the same people that we were two or three years ago. Hell, we aren't even the same people that we were a month ago. We are married to each other now. And I can't handle wondering what it is that your going to freak out over the next time. When the next time is that you'll decide you want to be done with this and whether or not you'll mean it." I ran my fingers over my face and let out a deep breath.

"Well, what about you?" he said and then he was angry again. He was always so angry. "When the hell are you going to learn to stand up for me? When are you going to learn to be my wife and see things from my point of view. You say that I always look for an excuse to be mad at you well that's because you always give me one!"

I swiped at my tears angrily but refused to look at him. All of those years spent fighting and hating each other really had taken a toll on us. We'd already formed our habits with each other, the way that we dealt with each other. It didn't matter how in love we were. We were who we were and a couple of rings wouldn't or couldn't change that.

"God, Ashleigh!" He said, pulling away and walking to the other side of the room where he took several deep breaths. "Why can't we just shut up and be happy?"

"What are you doing here?" I said as I picked up my skirts and struggled to make it through the wet grass in my heels. It was close to four in the morning, we had just gotten home from Caroline's wedding dance. Mike had ended up coming with a pretty blond and had completely destroyed my evening. And now, as if my life didn't already suck, Brad Townsend was following me.

"Let me give you a ride home." he said. "Your tired and irritated and you've had way too much to drink. Fifteen minutes in a car with me is much better than spending a few days at least in a hospital. Trust me."

I glanced at him. "Don't be so sure." I said and started off towards my car again. Where the hell had I parked?
"Look, I'll be fine. If I can deal with you, I think I can handle anything."

He shrugged and had me convinced for a second that he was going to actually listen to me for once. I was wrong. Dead wrong. The next thing I know he's got me over his shoulder and is carrying me to his truck, kicking and screaming. "I don't want one of my jockey's to get hurt. It would really put me in a jam and right now, I can't afford to be in a jam." He set me down in front of him as he tried to push me inside the pick-up.

"Well, that's just too bad because I am driving home." I had my knee in just the right position to get him where it really hurts but he was a step ahead of my drunk-mind.

"Quit being so stubborn, Griffen." he said, irritated as he tightened his grip on me. Our struggle stopped for a moment and he was staring straight down at me. I could feel his breath on my cheek and the sensation sent shivers down my spine.

"When you stop being such an ass." I said through gritted teeth.

I don't know what made him kiss me. I don't know what made me kiss him back. But all of a sudden he was standing in front of me and we were fighting and the next he was kissing me and I had my arms locked around his neck. When he stopped, the only thing that was cool was the feeling of his pick-up against my back.

I walked slowly to him now, resting one hand gently on his back and placing the other in his own hand. I kissed his shoulder gently and closed my eyes, feeling him tense beneath my touch. So this is what I did to him. I didn't relax him like most wives did. No, I made him tense up and shut down. Did that get me the wife of the year award?

I felt him pulling away and a tear leaked through my closed eyes. "I…Let's just go to bed." He said as he brushed past me. But when I laid down next to him he pulled me closer to him. My head rested on his bare chest and his hand rested on my hip while the other was laced with mine. And when I woke up…he was still there.