This chapter is dedicated to NADINE for suggesting that I show some of Jory's feelings about Ryan grounding her. I had meant to do this in her point of view but then this sort of wrote itself. I hope you guys like it, i'm very nervous about posting this chapter. Thank you for all of you reviews, too!
Chapter 14
"Can we talk, Jory?" I knocked lightly on her door. Her door was already open so I stepped in. I hadn't even seen her room since I've been staying here.
It's dark.
And depressing.
I really don't know how this girl got this way. Was it something her mother and I did?
Or is this just Jory trying to rebel?
I don't know, I don't know much about raising teenager daughters. It's a scary thing.
"Sure." She shrugs from her bed. I watch as she sketches something on the notepad she has propped up on her knees. She doesn't look up at me.
"Why are you mad at your mom?" I sit down on the bed.
"She let you do her dirty work." This girl was blunt. Truthful, reminded me a lot about her mom. "She wants you to be bad guy. Right now you are and it's not fair that I'm grounded." She huffed.
"I think it's very fair, considering you cut some girls hair off."
"She was asking for it!" Jory sat up and threw the notepad across the room. "She's so perfect. Her perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect body. Perfect everything. Everyone in that freaking school worships her. It's about time people see her as a normal person. She's no different then me. So, I cut some of her hair off, so what? It's not like it doesn't grow back."
"That might be true but that really doesn't give you the right to cut it." I try. I don't think my words are getting through this girls thick skull.
"You still shouldn't ground me. I'm really not liking you right now so would you please leave me alone." She says harshly. I just shake my head and keep my body on her bed.
"I'm not going anywhere. What's going on, Jor? Why are you acting out?" I need her to talk to me. I need her to say something that will make me understand what goes on in that head of hers.
"I'm not acting out, now please leave." She clenches her teeth together.
"Is it because I haven't been around? Do you hate your mother. What?" I press on. I'm not usually like this but something about her behavior is leaving me to know answers. I understand when someone just doesn't want to talk but I can't let that be Jory's case. I won't let her do what I did and keep things bottled up. She'll just explode one day. It won't be a good thing.
That's when I caught sight of her wrist.
How in the hell had I not noticed that before.
I reach my hand out but she pulls hers away so I can't touch her.
"Leave." Tears are starting to form in her eyes. I see that little girl that I used to hold tightly to me when she couldn't sleep. I see the little girl who loved being spun around until she almost threw up.
"I am your father, Jory. I can't let you do this."
"Some father you've been! You didn't even fight to stay with us, Dad! You didn't care! You're just back because things backfired with Rebecca."
She's wrong.
As much as I won't admit it out loud I love her mother.
I love my daughters.
"Why are you cutting, Jory?" It comes out more of a whisper, I hadn't really intended that. She just glares at me.
"You don't get it, do you?" She shakes her head violently.
"What don't I get?"
"That I don't want you here. We were all doing just fine without you."
Her words hurt. Real bad.
"You started doing that because of me?" I gulp.
"No, I did it because no one cares about me. I'm the middle child. I'm the one everyone looks over. I'm the one mom doesn't care about, the one you never hug or kiss. I did this because it makes me feel better."
I don't think I can handle this.
I'm usually strong in situations like this but…this…is big. This is something I wasn't expecting from my little girl.
"You're going to stop whatever you're doing. You're wrong, we don't overlook you. I love you more than anything, Jory. Every time your mother or I even try to show affection for you, you pull away." I don't know what else to say.
I'm not doing well with this.
Not at all.
"Whatever" She mumbles.
What else am I supposed to do? What do I say in a situation like this?
I need Taylor.
She'll know what to do.
"You're still grounded…" I say standing up from her bed.
"Good, that way I don't have to leave this freaking room and see your face!"
She's really good at using words to break my heart.
That's exactly what she's doing.
-
"She's cutting." Taylor's sitting on the bed pulling her shirt over her head.
"Who's cutting?" She looked confused.
"Jory." I say remembering I was supposed to talk to Kelsey about what was going on, I had completely forgotten that after my talk with Jory. "She's cutting. It's my fault."
"What?" Taylor just sits there in disbelief.
"She's…Taylor what do we do?"
"I'll…I don't know. God, I am a freaking therapist for crying out loud! I should know how to handle my daughter, but I don't. I'm at a loss of what to do or say. Even to you." She looks up at me and I know she's searching for something in my eyes.
"She says we overlook her." I sit down next to her.
"I'm a failure." Taylor leaned her head against my shoulder as I wrapped my arms around her bare waist.
"This isn't your fault, Taylor. God, if anyone is to blame it's me. All these years I could have spent with you guys. I could have prevented this from happening. Prevented my daughter from feeling…alone."
"Don't. Ryan, don't put the blame all on yourself. Don't, please." She's almost begging.
"I can't help it." I whisper.
"I know." She nods before crying into my shoulder.
-
Taylor cried herself to sleep the night before.
I woke up to the girls talking loud in the living room. It sounded like yelling. I quickly pulled my clothes on to check out the situation.
I glanced at the clock and realized that it was almost 10. I had completely forgotten it was Saturday.
"What's going on?" I enter the living room.
"Nothing!" Jory yells at me.
"Doesn't sound like nothing." I walk closer to them.
"Just but out, Dad." I've never heard Kelsey speak to me like that before. She's never raised her voice to me, she's never disrespected me in any way.
I'm totally and completely out of my element in a house full of women.