Chapter Seven:
I leave her without another word, submerged in her own doubts and thoughts while I try to focus upon my own. Will she tell? That has been bothering me relentlessly throughout our conversation. Well, more of a reunion.
She spoke of Draco's condition, and now the weight of guilt is something else to worry of. It had occurred to me, but I never thought it was so serious. A suicidal? Who has stopped him? Perhaps his… No. He is ashamed of her; I know that, though no one else does.
I've hurt so much without even realizing it. My own concerns have completely blocked out the thoughts of others. Even my mother. I strive to be kind as much as possible, but it just seems that we can never see eye to eye. She looks at me as if I'm a stranger, not her own child.
I search and find a deserted compartment. Settling in there, I think of my chances of sleep coming. Very little, but a chance is a chance. I block out the negative thoughts that plague my mind and close my brown eyes. Brown, so different from the turquoise I loved.
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She leaves me, and my eyes well up with tears. She is gone once again, without speaking. What has become of the Sierra we knew and loved? All her enthusiasm is dead. She is ashamed of herself, of being the Slytherin Ice Princess. It is a dark burden, but what can be so terrible about it? Maybe there is something she never told us. A small, but significant detail.
A ghost of her former self that is all I can think of her. The Queen has fallen, and we are ruled by something stronger than power and darker than death.
Fear.
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Time passes and Sierra sleeps soundly while Francesca makes her way back to the compartment, drying her tears. There awaits the ignorant of all that has happened within the period she was gone.
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My eyes slowly flutter open as I blink away the bright light shining down upon me from the ceiling. With a heavy sigh, I sit up and stare at the empty seat across from me.
I'm so alone. So afraid. Francesca troubles me. Her fiery will will most likely tear down my hiding in an attempt to restore peace. If only she knew. I'm hiding for more than one reason, and I highly doubt I can trust her with this secret.
It's a dark life I live in, one without protection or care, only my will to stay alive.
Will. That is something we all possess though hardly use it. It is just a passing ability that no one thinks much of, but what's the point of using it? It will just betray us in the end. Like me. Like Michael.
Michael.
He has some form of control over me, but I can't figure out what. Possession is not the answer; neither is the Imperious curse, but no… It can't be.
It must be wrong! It must be wrong! I was meant to love Draco not Michael. It has already begun, this curse, this prophecy, and I will fight against it if I have to die for it.
I will not be his love. I won't be his at all. I will fight to the end. I will kill him.
In a whisper, I repeat this. "I will kill him."
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"Where were you Francesca?" They bombard me with the same questions. Where were you? Where were you?
"I went to the lavatories." I speak calmly. My brother eyes me suspiciously, but then commences to tease me.
"Why do girls take so bloody long? Especially my sister. It's like she can do whatever she wants…"
I cut him off. "And you can't? You're my brother how can you have any less power than I do? That is my question."
"Touché."
"Gracias."
Cleo watches, barely holding back her giggling self. Very uncommon unless we mock fight and Sierra jokes around.
I mentally hit myself. Why must I think about her? She told me not to tell anyone, but imagine how happy they would all be. Especially Draco. Maybe his death wish won't come.
I wear a fake smile and sit upon the seat while turning to the window.
Maybe his death wish won't come…
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The call of Hagrid booms through Hogsmede Station and the first years cower some while the more experienced greet him. Well, at least the respectful greet him.
He calls out my name, but I pretend not to hear him. It's best if I don't speak to anyone right now. At least not until I am ready to face anyone.
At least I can isolate myself for a while, maybe no one will speak to me. It's not as if I'm giving off an aura of friendliness right now.
"You're Hermione right?" I guess I was wrong. As for the question, I wish I could scream out NO but that would attract attention now wouldn't it?
"Yes, I am actually."
"I'm sorry for Draco's behavior earlier. He's… troubled." Cleo, she speaks to me and my heart lifts. I haven't spoken to her like this ever before. It brings back happier days.
"It's alright. I've known him long enough not to expect anything better." I wave my hand in carelessness, but she is not satisfied.
"No. It's not alright. The way he treats you is terrible and I would like to start anew with you, all of us do. Meaning me, Blaise, Francesca, Matthew, Pansy, Daphne, and even Draco. We'd all like to make it up to you." A sincere smile and a slight pleading with her hazel eyes makes me give in.
"I would like that." She smiles wide and grasps my hand, pulling me into the crowd with her, through all the students, old and new.
Finally, she stops in front of a rather large carriage, probably an enlarging charm.
She puts one foot on the step leading towards the entrance and pauses to make a wave with her hand that says, 'come'. I oblige. With tentativeness, I climb on and peer inside to see the people of which we were just speaking. The Slytherins have a slight ashamed look in their eyes except for Draco. He stares at me curiously, as if he's just seen me for the first time.
The silence rings and no conversations are begun until Francesca decides to take over.
"What was your childhood like?" The smug smirk on her face as she crossed her arms, glaring at me triumphantly annoys me so. No matter. I have an answer for everything.
"Ordinary really, except for the fact that I was ignored mostly. I had one great friend, but after I came to Hogwarts, he rejected me and we never spoke again. I miss him, but I also want to avoid him. He was never a good influence, always bent on wanting to cause chaos. Mostly illegal things. He seemed to overpower me and it scared me. I decided to not try to revive our friendship again." Her violet eyes widen and she realizes part of my message. I'm speaking of Michael. He was my true first friend. I know that I call Matthew as such, but I lie. I pretend as if our relationship never happened in hopes that one day I'll wake up and forget that it ever did.
"You used to break the rules? I'll believe it when I see it." Blaise crosses his arms like Francesca. He wants to grab her attention. I can tell the way his eyes dart to her every now and then. Poor girl is clueless.
Silently I promise myself to bring them together. Just because my heart failed me doesn't mean it has to happen to them.
"Perhaps you won't have to see it. If you knew who I was then, you would believe it."
Francesca stares at me with the question of 'What are you doing?'.
"Oh really?" Draco speaks and leans across towards me and pulls me towards him. "Are you so sure that I would believe it?" He breathes, his old self returning. I'm becoming dizzy. "You wouldn't do anything outside your comfort zone." It's a simple but meaningful challenge. I can feel Francesca's warning on my back.
"Really? What proof do you have?" Slowly, I kissed him and he responded. The feeling of completeness was so familiar but so alien. I hadn't experienced this since… Michael
The thought of him makes me pull away and the carriage slows to a stop.
The shock of all of this makes the tension build, Draco's grey eyes widen, and he falls into his abyss of depression once more.
As I jump out of the carriage and run towards the looming castle shrouded in shadows I can hear the whisper of, "That was so familiar."
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Is she an idiot? How could she do something so rational and… impulsive?
Oh, wait. She's Sierra. That's the basis of her personality.
"Are you alright?" Blaise asks him worriedly. He's his best friend and shall remain that way forever.
"No." Draco blinks away tears. "That reminded me so much of…"
The name hangs in the air.
Oh Sierra what have you done?
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Ron, Harry, Ginny, and Dean stare at me with concern. But Dean has something more in his eyes. Hunger? No. He's not like that. I've known him long enough, but then everyone believes I'm something the opposite of myself. Whom can you trust when you can't even trust yourself?
"Hermione…" Ginny whispers, placing her hand over mine. "Are you alright?" She's the only person who can read me so well besides my friends.
"I'm fine Ginny. Just a little shaken over what happened on the train." I'm not lying, but I'm not telling the truth either.
"Are you sure you have no idea who that was?" She observes me closely and under her stare, I feel naked.
"I'm positive Gin. It was just frightening. It's not every day when that happens." Ginny nods slowly in understanding, but you don't understand. No one understands.
"Hermione," Dean begins, softly resting his hand on mine, just like Ginny moments before. "I have something to ask you..."
"Miss Granger?" I turn around to see Francesca and the rest gathered behind Professor McGonagall. "I am to lead the others and you to your dormitory." I stand slowly, removing my hand from Dean's grasp. I look at him and he seems disgruntled and turns to glare at Draco. Is it because of the confrontation, or something else?
"I'll talk with you later, okay Dean?" His eyes tear away from his enemy and towards mine, where they soften and look at me lovingly.
"Of course, but I'm going with you."
"What?"
"I'm a prefect, remember?" He looks amused at my shocked expression and I shake it off quickly.
"Oh yes, sorry."
"It's perfectly fine." He raises my hand to his lips and brushes it lightly. It's such a simple gesture, but I know that it's familiar.
"Ahem." I draw my attention away to see Draco staring at us, one eyebrow raised. "They have left us." I see that he is correct. They're backs are seen leaving through the large oaken doors.
"Oh!" I gasp.
We hurry to catch up, Dean staying close by while Draco trails behind us. I can feel a stare of resentment on my neck, I think I know why. I can't believe I started this mess. Soon we are in the large group of Prefects, Heads, and new comers.
She leads us far away from the bustling antics of the hall and into a great tower where the stairs wind higher and higher.
The Professor I've come to respect stops us in front of a portrait of a girl, about 17 like us. She has ebony black hair and turquoise eyes… Like me. I cannot see the rest of her face though for a fan decorated with roses hides the rest of her face. Her silky voice is muffled as she speaks.
"You." She points a finger towards me. It's hardly seen under the long sleeves of her midnight blue dress. "What do you wish the password to be?" Everyone stares at me in questioning. They are confused as to why this portrait would single me out so easily.
"Ummm… I'm not so sure. What about, 'the curse of the midnight rose'?" I say it quickly. Francesca's eyes widen at my forwardness. The rose. My friend, my enemy.
"Very well. Do watch out for yourself, things aren't what they seem." Her familiar eyes flicker towards Dean and then she bends her head to one side in confusion. That is, I'm assuming. I can only see her eyes and they seem to show the emotion, but can paintings have emotions?
"This is where I leave you." Professor McGonagall snaps us out of our trance to announce this. "Do try to behave yourselves." She looks between Draco and Dean. I think she knows of their quarrel earlier. Some how they know everything, everything except the truth about me. I wish they did.
I wish they did.
Author's Note:
Hello. I'm sorry for not updating for such a long while. I have school and it's beginning to pressure me more than ever. I need to do my homework right now as a matter of fact. I have a social life too and I have no inspirationg lately. I'll try to update sooner next time, but I can't guarantee anything.
Queen of Serpents,