I want the first kiss up, so I just had to post this chapter!

Okay, first of all, I just want to say that I went to go see WANTED today, and there was this advertisement for… I don't really remember because I was too excited, but some advertisement for a camera and they showed one of those behind the scenes pictures of Rob Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and I let out a loud, "Yeah! Woo! Hot!" hahaha

Anywho, back to business—I suppose I'm aloud to say that this chapter is dedicated to xXxSilent-WhisperxXx and Night script, my two most supportive fans who always leave me reviews. Thanks a million!

I hope everyone enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. :D

Also!! First look at Jaaaacob! Haha enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, I am not Stephenie Meyer.

Chapter 5 Vulnerabilities

"Come in," I called loud enough for whoever stood outside my door to hear.

"Good morning, Bella." It was Esme and she was wearing some kind of silk night dress. From this angle, it would have seemed that Esme really did just wake up, when in actuality, it was very unlikely.

"Good morning, Esme."

"Carlisle is in his study, and he would like a word with you." She dragged on the 'and' with a little twinkle in her eye. She knew how long I had been waiting for the chance to speak with him.

"Excellent!" I quickly jumped out of bed and rushed to the door kissing Esme softly on the cheek. She giggled slightly at my enthusiasm, letting me pass. She really would be a wonderful mother.

As I headed down stairs, while passing the second level, I ran into Rosalie at the top of the stairs. Her eyes slowly flickered to mine, but she didn't show any kind of welcome. I fidgeted momentarily, tucking my hair away from my face and gave her the most polite smile I could muster. She didn't respond, she just passed me and continued her way down the stairs.

I was surprised by the malice in her eyes. She certainly did not know me well enough to dislike me, or so I thought. I paused to let her finish her journey down the stairs. I didn't want the opportunity to run into her again.

"I'm sorry about Rosalie." I spun around to see it was Emmett who spoke. He was standing by their bedroom door. "She isn't always like this."

"That's alright, but thanks anyway." And I gave him a smile.

"So you're Bella. I haven't had the chance to properly meet you. I'm Emmett." He flashed me a wide, dimply grin before reaching out his hand to shake.



I took his hand; at least he isn't disgusted by me.

I spent most of the day in Carlisle's office, hearing more stories about his past. His life was so amazing; it was a wonder how so much could happen to one person. But then I remembered Carlisle has been in this world for hundreds of years. He told me why Edward, Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie attend school. Carlisle said that one day, hopefully within the year I will be able to ignore the scent of blood so I too can be around humans. He suggested we begin training sometime next week; taking me to the grocery store, which was ironic sense we don't eat human food, or to a little backpacker's shop called Newton's Outfitters. Carlisle thinks that getting accustomed to the smell of human blood would help me control the craving.

Furthermore, Carlisle and I eventually discussed my special talent. I told him everything I knew about my talent, and how the radius of its extent. He told me I must have been very much in tuned to my surroundings while I was alive.

After sitting quietly for a minute, I glanced up at Carlisle's walls. They were covered in old pictures of him and other vampires from the Volterra, and there where shelves placed to the ceiling stocked with books. As I glanced quickly at the labels, I noticed Mansfield Park. I gasped and quickly walked over to retrieve the book.

Analyzing the tattered cover that seemed to have been read many many times, I felt my dead heart swell up with what I assumed was happiness.

"I see you are a fan of Jane Austen," Carlisle said.

I turned to see he was standing right behind me, looking over my shoulder at the cover of the wonderful book in my hands.

"Yes." There was nothing else I could say. I was so surprised he owned it. "Do you think I could—"

"Borrow it?" Carlisle finished my sentence for me. "Of course."

Carlisle dismissed me then, allowing me to return to my room. As soon as I closed my bedroom door behind me, I threw myself onto my bed and began the first page.

I was a third of a ways into the book when I finally realized why my thoughts kept flashing to Edward's face. The hero in this book was named Edmund. Coincidence?

"Bella?" Edward's voice came from behind my door at that moment, startling me. I realized I had froze on the spot as if I was child caught doing something very wrong.

"Come in," I said quietly. I didn't speak too loud, afraid my voice might give away my sudden edginess. Fortunately, I was able to control my face before Edward entered my room.

"Hi," he smiled crookedly at me.

"Hi," I sighed.

Edward's eyes flickered to the book in my hands. "What are you reading?"



"Mansfield Park by Jane Austen!"

Edward laughed at my excitement.

"Can you believe your father had this in his study?" I glanced back down at the book in my hands. I was filled with so much gratitude, I could have screamed.

"No, I didn't. Have you read this one?" Edward slowly took a seat beside me, his eyes on my face.

"Yes, I have and I simply adore it. As soon as I'm able to be around humans again without wanting to suck their blood, we have to make a trip to a book store."

I met Edward's eyes then, and suddenly regretted it. His face was serious, and weary, but again I saw the longing in his eyes. I was so nervous, but I couldn't look away. His eyes bore into mine, and then they flickered to my lips. I heard him swallow hard as he, ever so slightly, leaned towards me. I drank in his smell as I watched his eyes and I felt my body become, if at all possible, a bit flushed. I couldn't think and I was just as surprised as he was with my next move. Without thinking, I leaned into Edward for a kiss.

Before our lips met, I felt his body go rigid and herd the sudden hitch in his breath. I opened my eyes. Edward was leaning away from me, and there was visible pain in his eyes.

"I can't," he whispered to me. "I'm sorry."

"What do you mean?"

"I can't do this." He got up and tried to leave my room, but I reached the door before him.

"What do you mean you can't do this?" I'm sure there was horror written all over my face. Rejection was filling my soul. "Isn't this what you want? What about all those hour long talks with me— how you 'never wanted anyone before'—or the looks you give me?" My voice was coming out in dry sobs. I didn't know where the sudden rush of emotion was coming from, but I knew this day had to come.

His face was distorted in pain as he stared at the ground between us. Had I been misinterpreting his actions? I wanted to cry. One of the only things I truly hated about being a vampire was, I couldn't cry. No tears would escape my eyes, and it always used to bring me comfort knowing there was always a way to release the pain I felt.

"Am I just a game to you?" My voice came out in a broken whisper.

"No, Bella. You don't understand. I mean, no, I've never wanted anyone else. I've never felt this way but…"

"But, what?" I cut him off, meeting his eyes again. "What? What are you trying to do here then? Why are you like this?"

"Like what?" His face was pained. I could see the pain I was causing him, but I didn't care.



"Like how you are! You can't just… you can't just dazzle me one moment and act completely uninterested the next! You can't just play with people's emotions!" I was in hysterics. I've never felt so vulnerable before, so I did the only thing I could do.

I turned around and yanked the door open, breaking it off its hinges, and then ran for the stairs as fast as I could. I noticed Alice starring at me wide-eyed as I reached the landing, but I didn't care. As soon as I reached the front door, I yanked it open as well, not even caring about the damage I was causing the too perfect house.

Once outside in the light drizzle, I ran as fast as I could through the trees. I knew Edward couldn't hear my mind, but he was still much faster than I, so I zigzagged through trees here and there in hopes he wouldn't catch up. To my complete surprise, and complete horror, Edward didn't even follow me.

I slowed my pace and glanced behind me, but he wasn't there. Looking around, I stopped running completely. He was nowhere to be seen. I closed my eyes, concentrating on the one sound that stood out to me more than any other sound in the world, his voice. I couldn't hear it. He didn't follow me.

There was a pain in my chest, stronger than anything I've ever felt. It was as if my dead heart was being ripped from my body. He didn't want me, and he probably never did. I dropped to my knees, dry sobs escaping my lips. The pain was nearly unbearable. What have I done? I thought. I would rather hide my true feelings from him for a lifetime, than never be able to set eyes on him again. The knife in my heart plunged deeper.

I had to get out of Forks; I had to somehow get away from the unbearable pain. I got up slowly from the ground and darted into the trees again, away from his home.

As I ran, I came along a sudden scent that burned my nose. It caught me off guard and I slammed into the nearest tree.

Suddenly an enormous dog ran out from behind the trees some twenty feet away. It was nothing like any animal I had ever seen. It was large, bigger than a bear, with russet fur, white shining razor sharp teeth and the smell. The monster ran out towards me, snarling loudly while snapping its dagger teeth at me.

I was terrified so I did the only thing I could think of, I screamed at the top of my lungs and lunged backwards, away from the creature. The thing was abnormally huge, towering over me, advancing on me until my back reached a nearby tree, pinning me in front of the monster. Its black eyes peered through its thick fur, gleaming in the moonlight.

I closed my eyes, preparing myself for death, when I heard the sound of a second roar that rang with fury. My eyes shot open and landed on Edward just a few feet away from the monster and I. He was crouched down, his eyes black and fixed on the giant creature before me. Edward looked lethal, almost like a lion waiting to pounce. The sight of him here to save me made my stomach clench and my heart break at the same time.

"She is one of us," Edward said in a low ghastly snarl.

The monster turned its gaze quickly to Edward then back to me, snarling loudly inches from my face; its hot breath blowing my hair away from my stunned face.

"Stop! She's with us!" Edward snarled again, but louder this time.



The monster turned its head to Edward again, watching him. Then slowly, very slowly, it backed away from me and retreated into the woods.

It seemed Edward didn't make a move until the he was sure the creature was gone. He sat up straight, very slowly and turned to meet my terrified expression, his eyes slowly turning back into their regular shade of gold.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, his voice still a bit husky.

I couldn't speak. I just stared at him in bewilderment. I was still shocked about what had just happened. I was almost eaten alive by a giant dog, and Edward saved me. The rain had begun to pick up, knocking me back to reality.

"I'm… confused," I said. "What was that?" I looked back in the direction of where the creature once was. I clenched my fists noticing my hands were still shaking.

"That was a werewolf. His name is Jacob and he's one of the leaders of the Quileute pack."

"The what?"

"The tribe down in La Push is named Quileute. The wolves belong to that tribe. Don't you remember what Carlisle told you?" Edward seemed to be keeping the serious mask on his face.

"Yes. I just… I don't know. I guess I'm still a little freaked out." I looked at Edward again, and looking into his beautiful eyes, I suddenly remembered why I was mad at him. "What are you doing here?"

He seemed taken aback by my sudden change in tone. "I came to get you."

"How did you know where I was?"

"I heard Jacobs mind and…" he made a slightly confused face.

"And what, Edward?"

"I saw you in his mind. On my way to find you, I heard you scream and knew you were in danger. I'm sorry I didn't make it here earlier. I could have led you away from the border."

Edward was watching my face carefully, probably waiting for an answer. I was still angry at him, but his gaze seemed to mystify my anger turning into that alien feeling I feel whenever I'm around him. I dropped my eyes to the ground. What was that feeling?

"Thank you," I said in a whisper.

"For what?"

"For saving my life."

I looked up to see Edward's expression. He was watching me still, but with a slight frown. Then suddenly, something in his eyes changed and Edward was running towards me. Before I had a chance to react, he took hold of my waist and crushed his lips to mine. I couldn't breathe. The intoxicating smell of his body, and the 

realization that he was kissing me was clouding my brain. I quickly reached up, tangling my hands in his hair and forced my body closer to his. All too soon, Edward released my lips, allowing me a moment to gasp in the air I didn't really need.

Our eyes met and a wide crinkly-eyed grin spread across his face.

I'm a tease!! haha

I know, the kiss was one of those "he rushed me" kind of kiss, but honestly, through experience, I believe those are the most romantic. None of that sparing-the-moment cheesecake crap! He just grabbed her and did it! Did what his heart wanted him to do! Right in the damn moment!! Yes!! My kind of guy.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it. oh! And Jake as a wolf. Wow. I tried to make him seem aggressive, yet understanding. He is a sweetheart after all, right?

Review!

-PuppetStrings19