The day went on slowly, the two boys sat in Troy's room under the covers; Ryan's head was resting against Troy's chest and he was absent mindedly stroking patterns over Troy's covered chest. The program that they had been watching had just finished and Troy looked down at Ryan surprised to see him deep in thought. "What you thinking about, Ry?" Troy asked softly, his left hand tangled in Ryan's hair stroking it gently.

"I was thinking that maybe I'm ready to talk?" Ryan sounded unsure, and even though Troy knew that this was a good thing.

"And I'm ready to listen," Troy smiled though he was scared of what Ryan had to say.

"When my parents kicked me out I went to stay with Brett," Ryan said quietly, he was shaking, Troy wrapped his arms tighter around him letting him know that he was there. "Brett wasn't pleased."

When Ryan stopped talking, Troy looked down and noticed the small trail of tears down his face. He pulled Ryan up and hugged him tightly. "He wasn't interested in me for more then sex." Ryan choked back a sob as he gripped a hand in Troy's shirt. "He said I could stay with him but I had to earn my keep."

Troy wanted to ask about it but he knew he had lost his voice. He couldn't interrupt what Ryan was saying all he could do was be there for him. "At first during the holiday I still had some money from my parents so I gave it to him for rent and food and everything, but he spent it on drugs." Troy stared at Ryan hoping he wasn't going to hear what was coming next, "He convinced me everything would be okay, I just had to loosen up a bit."

Troy tenses up, Ryan and drugs were too things he couldn't picture. "I didn't want to, but I had nothing else. So I did it. He was right it made me feel good, and I wanted to feel good more. Soon all the money was gone so he got me a job at the club he worked at. That's when I dyed my hair they didn't want me working there with the blond boy look because they had a reputation. So I dyed my hair, and worked behind the bar. But the money wasn't good. Brett he did other jobs and... I didn't want to do that." Ryan was shaking again, and Troy was afraid that if he was to hold him any tighter he would bruise him, so instead he ran a hand up and down his arms.

"I worked at the bar most of the summer, I wanted drugs more then food. But then my mum phoned me and I realised how much I miss my old life, how much I missed Sharpay and I missed being happy. She wanted to meet me, and I was stupid to think that she wanted me back in her life as her son. When I went to see her, she... had all my stuff in bags. She looked at me as if I wasn't there. I took my stuff and went back to Brett's he laughed at everything and then when he told me I had to get money for drugs that I felt like I needed so much, when he told me to sleep with an older man for money I didn't say no."

Troy was putting everything in order in his head, he was trying to follow it as though it was a story because then he could imagine it was Ryan reading it to him about someone else, someone that wasn't Ryan. "I was desperate, school was hard and I felt as though everyone was staring at me because everyone knew. But you were nice to me, you and Chad you didn't make me feel as though I was a freak, you made me feel like the old Ryan. Even though I had told Brett I would do it, nothing had been planned and I was just hoping it was going to pass. But then he picked me up and he told me where we going and I panicked."

Ryan was crying now, his body was shaking with fear and Troy had a tight hold on him. "Brett drove me there told me it would be okay, it was just sex it was no different to what me and him had done. But when I saw him, he was just too big, he was scary and I said no. I begged for him to stop but I guess he thought it was part of a game because the more I begged the harder he got. I tried to get Brett to help but he was already high and I doubt he would have helped any way." Ryan sobbed, Troy wanted him to stop he had tears falling from his own eyes.

"Once he was done, he beat me because I wouldn't stop crying. He threw the money at me and I realised how cheap I was because I couldn't even afford a decent meal with the bills he had given me. He just laughed at me and then I just left. I didn't stop running, I didn't even know where I was running too but then I stopped and I was at your house."

Troy held onto Ryan as though if he had let him go he would disappear. "I'm sorry you went through all of that," Troy said quietly. Ryan didn't answer he just held onto Troy as tight as Troy was holding onto him.

They sat on Troy's bed for half an hour just holding each other before Troy realised the crying had stopped and Ryan had cried himself into a deep sleep. Troy settled them down onto the bed and held him as he let more tears escape his eyes.

Troy wasn't sure when he fell asleep all he knew was that he was woken up by the sounds of whimpering, he was sure it was Ryan having a nightmare so sat up quickly but then he realised he was alone in the bed and the whimpering was coming from the far corner of his bedroom. He got up from his bed and walked over to Ryan who was sat holding a basketball in his hand, an old yearbook was sat opened on the floor. Troy sat down next to him, and Ryan moved closer. "You know my dad was always trying to get me to play sports." Ryan sniffed as he held the basketball.

"Oh yeah?" Troy asked curiously.

"I could never play basketball, you know how bas I am at golf, when I hit my first home run I was seven, I think that was the proudest my dad ever was of me. When I told him I wanted to play baseball he took me out every Saturday to a private cage, we would spend the whole day just playing baseball and I felt normal. But then I did my first performance and baseball fell second in things I love. My dad wasn't pleased, when ever he could he would try and get me to play sports, always tell me that wearing hats made me look stupid, he didn't like the clothes I wore. He stopped loving me for who I was and just held onto the memory of me at seven being the son he wanted me to be."

Troy picked up the yearbook that was on the floor, it was of the baseball team. "I liked it better when I wasn't out." Ryan sighed. "I liked it better when my parents wanted to know me."

"You need to give your parents time, they might come round. But if not you're always going to have people who love you for who you are." Troy said soothingly. "You'll always have me, and friends who are there for you."

"Mean it?" Ryan sniffed.

"Yeah, I mean it." Troy smiled. "I'm not saying it's going to be easy, and I'm not going to say that I understand everything you're going through because I don't. But you're not alone. You've got me, my parents they want to help the best they can."

"Don't tell them, please." Ryan sighed. "About the drugs. I don't want them to know how weak I am."

"Ryan you're many things, but weak wouldn't be a word I used to describe you." Troy smiled. "You stopped though?"

"I guess." Ryan shrugged. "I wasn't really addicted. I just liked feeling good."

"We'll find you another way to make you feel good okay?" Ryan looked at Troy with a raised eyebrow. "Funny," Troy smirked. "But you know what I mean?"

"Yeah, I know." Ryan leant his head against Troy's shoulder.