1Title: A Twist of Fate
Ratings/Warnings: Angst
Beta: loracj2
Disclaimers: I own nothing in relation to The O.C. All mistakes are mine.
Summary: Beginning of Season 1, AU, In The Pilot, Kirsten asks Sandy "What if this is all a scam? What if he's just using you to case the house?" In this story it is the truth, but not by Ryan's choice. For the purposes of this story Dawn is dead and there never was a Trey.
A/N: The past few chapters haven't been as angsty as others. However, this chapter is officially "The Return of the Angst." This was written with a heavy-hand. Seriously, bring a shovel...a big one.
Twist of Fate: Chapter Twelve
"All right, honey. We'll see you then." Kirsten hung up the phone and turned towards Seth and Ryan, who were seated at the kitchen table.
"That was Sandy. He said he'll be home in a few minutes, and not to bother with the leftovers. He already grabbed something on the way home."
Ryan immediately stood and started clearing the table.
"Thank you, Ryan." Kirsten smiled warmly at him. "It's so nice to have someone to help around the house." She looked pointedly at Seth.
"I agree completely. It is nice. In fact, I think Ryan should spend every weekend with us, to lift some of the burden fromyouof course, mother. What do you say, Ryan? You got anything planned for the next hundred or so weekends?" And without thinking, Seth clapped Ryan soundly in the middle of his back.
Ryan let out a cry of pain and lurched forward. He stumbled, grabbing a hold of the kitchen stool for support, but in doing so, he dropped the dishes he had been carrying. The second they hit the tile floor, they shattered to pieces. Ryan stared in horror at the shards of broken glass that now lay scattered all over the floor, then he looked up at Kirsten, fear evident on his face.
"I'm so very sorry. Please forgive me. I'll clean it up. I promise." He dropped to one knee and started picking up the broken pieces.
"Ryan, don't do that," Kirsten ordered. "You could cut yourself. I'll go get the broom."
"I can't let you do that. This is my mess...my fault. I should be the one to clean it up." He spoke quickly, his breathing becoming more erratic. He didn't even look at her as he continued to pick up the pieces of glass with his bare hands.
Kirsten grew increasingly concerned about Ryan. It was obvious that he was afraid of something...or more likely someone. She knelt down next to him. "It's okay, Ryan. They're just dishes and I know it was an accident. Let me help."
"No!" The force of his voice startled her. "You don't understand. It's my fault. It's always all my fault. I'm stupid, and lazy, and careless, and I never think about anyone but myself." Suddenly, he looked up at her and grabbed her arm. "Please don't tell Mr. Cohen," he pleaded.
As if on cue, Sandy walked into the kitchen.
"I'm home." He stopped short when he saw Kirsten and Ryan on the floor. "Whoa, what happened here?"
Kirsten thought Ryan had looked frightened before, but it did not even come close to the look of sheer terror that crossed his face the moment he heard Sandy's voice.
She should have been relieved that he had stopped picking up the broken glass, but instead he had scooted himself backwards, pressing himself into the corner of the kitchen cabinets. He drew his knees up to his chest and buried his head into them. He placed his arms over his head, his fists clenched so tight that his knuckles were turning white.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Ryan repeated the phrase over and over, his voice and body trembling.
"Kid," Sandy began, but got no further before Kirsten interrupted him.
"Sandy, go in the other room."
"But..."
"Just do it." Her voice left no room for argument.
Sandy knew that were times over the weekend that Ryan had been afraid of him, but never like this. He clutched his briefcase tightly. Thinking of all the horrible details it contained about Ryan' life. Looking back, he was amazed that Ryan had ever been able to gather the courage to call him after Art had thrown him out.
"Sandy, please." Kirsten's voice jolted him back to reality. Hesitant to leave, Sandy looked at the scene in front of him. It didn't feel right leaving Kirsten to pick up the pieces, both literally and figuratively. In the end, he decided the best thing to do would be to comply with Kirsten's wishes. There would be plenty of time for him to talk to both of them later. For now, Ryan needed to feel safe, and Sandy knew that his wife had more to offer Ryan at that moment than he did. Reluctantly, he nodded and left the room.
Kirsten turned her attention back to Ryan. She wished she could take him in her arms, like she used to when Seth was little and hurt. She wished she could hold him and tell him that everything would be okay. She wished she could promise him that as long as he was in her care, no one would ever hurt him again. She wished things were different.
She wondered if anyone had ever said any of those words to him. Had anyone ever promised to protect and keep this boy safe? And if she said them now, would he even be able to believe her?
She opened her mouth to say something, anything that might help, but before she could speak, she noticed a thin line of blood coming from his still clenched fists.
"Ryan, you're bleeding. Let me see your hands, please."
Until that moment Ryan had not moved, remaining huddled in the kitchen corner. When he heard Kirsten's voice, he finally looked up. His eyes frantically darted back and forth, obviously searching for Sandy. Finally, they came to a stop, resting on Kirsten's face. He looked at her, not with the fear that had been there a few minutes ago, but with wide-eyed amazement.
"Ryan, I need to see your hand."
He didn't say a word. He simply held out his hand for her inspection, his eyes still full of awe. She gently pried his hand open to discover that he had been clutching a piece of broken glass.
"Come on." She rose from the floor and took Ryan's elbow. "We need to clean this. I can't tell how deep it is. You might need stitches."
Ryan pulled his hand back, and drew it close to his chest.
"It's okay, Ryan. I said it might need stitches. I won't promise anything until I can get a better look." She started to lead him out of the kitchen. Before leaving, she turned to Seth. "Sweetie, could you clean this up for me, please?" She nodded to the floor.
Seth had watched the whole scene in front of him with uncharacteristic quietness. He didn't know exactly what had just happened, but he knew something was very wrong with Ryan. This was not the same guy who faced down two of Harbor's most imposing bullies the day before. So instead of his usual quick remark on child labor laws, he simply nodded his head in stunned silence.
ocococococococococ
As soon as Kirsten entered the bathroom, she turned on the sink and held Ryan's hand under the running water.
"Keep it there for a minute, while I find some bandages," she instructed. Once she found the first aid kit, she had Ryan sit down so she could get a better look at the cut.
"Good news." She smiled reassuringly at him. "It's not as deep as I thought. Antibiotic cream and bandages should be enough. I'll change the bandages and check it for infection again first thing in the morning. But unless something changes, I think you're safe from having to go to the doctor."
She kept her tone light and tried to smile at him again. She wasn't sure if he had heard a word she had said. He was still looking at her with the same expression of amazement.
"You didn't let him hit me."
"What?"
"You didn't let him hit me."
"Do you mean Sandy? Oh, Ryan, he would never..."
"My mom, she never stopped any of them." Ryan was no longer looking at her. His eyes were staring straight ahead, not really seeing anyone or anything. "Not my dad, not her boyfriends, not Art...not anyone. I think she was just glad it wasn't her. She was always so scared." He turned to look at Kirsten again. "But not you. You weren't scared at all. You stopped him and made him go away." He blinked twice before looking down at his bandaged hand. "Thank you."
Somehow it was the "thank you" that broke Kirsten's heart the most. She and Sandy had already suspected the abuse, but to hear Ryan express such sincere gratitude over not getting hit was almost too much.
"Ryan, I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of that. I don't want you to be scared and hurt anymore. Sandy and I want to help you." She shook her head. "No, we are going to help you. But first, you need to help us. You need to tell us the truth about your stepfather and how he treats you."
Ryan quickly stood up. "There's nothing to tell."
"But you just said..."
"I didn't say anything." He tried to step around Kirsten, but she blocked his way. "Even if I did, it doesn't mean anything. I'm lucky Art kept me around after my mom died. He could have just as easily stuck me in foster care."
"Ryan, you can't possibly expect me to believe that you're "lucky" to be living with Art. Especially after what I just witnessed in the kitchen."
"I overreacted. I'm sorry. It won't happen again." Once more, he tried to leave the small room to no avail.
"You don't have to lie anymore. Sandy and I can help you. I promise. You just need to trust us."
"I do trust you, Mrs. Cohen." He looked directly in her eyes, and spoke with more strength and conviction than she had heard all weekend. "I trust that after tomorrow, you and the rest of your family will forget all about your promises and all about me. Just like everyone else in my life has."
She was so taken back, she didn't even try to stop him from walking out the door this time.
"Ryan, stop!"
He had his hand on the patio door's handle when Kirsten's command stopped him cold. "Please," she added softly.
He slowly turned toward her. His head was bowed, but she could see he was looking at her through his bangs.
"Ryan, I need to discuss some things with Sandy, and I want you to stay here, in the house."
He took a small step backwards.
"Nothing is going to happen to you if you wait here. I'm simply going to talk to Sandy for a few minutes and then the three of us need to sit down and talk things over together."
Another small step backwards.
"I already told you there's nothing to talk about."
"I know, but I think there is. I just want to us to talk. Talk, Ryan. That's it, nothing more. Please, do this one thing for me. Will you wait here, inside with Seth? Please?"
He stood still for a moment. Thinking it over. Finally, he gave her a curt nod.
She sighed with relief. "Thank you." She turned to Seth. She hated to ask him to keep an eye on Ryan, when he was standing right there, but she saw no other choice. "Seth," she began.
"It's okay, Mom. You don't need to say anything. I've got it covered."
She smiled in appreciation and went to join Sandy in his office.
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"Dude! What was that?" Seth asked, raising his arms in the air and waving his hands in the direction of the kitchen. "And don't ask what, because you know what I'm talking about. You just had a major spaz attack in our kitchen."
"It wasn't that big of a deal, Seth."
"Not that big a deal?!? You totally freaked me out."
"Sorry."
"I didn't mean it like that. It's just that yesterday you were so cool taking on both Chet and Logan, but every time you're around my dad, you act.." He paused for a second. "I don't know...nervous around him. It's like you're scared of him or something."
Seth looked at Ryan for a moment, frowning.
"You're not, are you? Scared of Dad, I mean. Because he's not exactly the type of guy to strike fear in the minions. I know that I don't know what your step-dad is like..."
At that moment, Seth got it. He felt like one of his comic book characters, when they had a light bulb go off over top of their head.
"So that's what all the talking's been about," he muttered to himself.
"What talking?"
"Both my mom and my dad have talked to me about you. How they wanted me to build Dad up, and encourage you to trust him. They wanted to know if you talked much about your step-dad. What's he like. What it's like living with him."
Ding! Another light bulb.
"Your face. The blood on your shirt yesterday. And just before you flipped out, I hit you on the back.. Ryan, does your step-dad...does he hit you?"
Ryan looked away, ashamed.
"That's it, isn't it? Your life is like some kind of after-school special."
"Yeah, my life is real special, all right."
"Why haven't you told someone?"
"How many times do I have to keep telling you people? There's nothing to tell. Besides, even if there was, there's no one in my life I can trust."
"What about one of your teachers? I've had some pretty decent ones in my time. Maybe they could have helped. You know, found you someplace else to live...some nice, safe, happy place."
"Grow up, Seth. There are no nice, safe, happy places, where I come from. There are only dumpy group homes where nobody gives a damn about you."
"Well...I...I give a damn," said Seth a little uncomfortably. "And so do my folks. I'm sure my dad could figure something out. He's a lawyer. He should know all about this kind of stuff. I'm sure he can help you."
"I don't think so. Listen, maybe things are all that great with Art, but it's not really that big of a deal. It's nothing that I can't handle."
"I don't believe you. If you could handle it, you wouldn't have lost it on the kitchen floor."
Ryan bristled at Seth's comment. "Just drop it, Seth. You don't know what you're talking about. I said I'm fine and I am."
He turned to leave, but Seth grabbed his arm.
"Let go of me, now!"
Shocked, Seth quickly released his hold on Ryan. Ryan's tone had actually scared him.
"I'm sorry, but my mom said..."
"I know what your mom said, and you can relax. I'm not going to leave. I just...I just need some space. Okay?"
ocococococococococ
A few minutes later, Sandy and Kirsten walked into the kitchen. Kirsten's face was pale and she was holding her stomach as if trying to stop herself from being ill.
Frantically, she began to look around the room.
"Where's Ryan?"
"It's okay, Mom." Seth said from his chair by the table facing the pool house. "He said he needed some air. He went out there about fifteen minutes ago. I've been watching him ever since. He's still there."
Kirsten and Sandy breathed a sigh of relief.
"You could have told me, you know."
"Told you about what, sweetie?"
"About Ryan and how his step-dad hits him."
"He told you about that?"
"No. But the scene in the kitchen was kind of a pretty big clue. I was able to figure the rest out myself. I even asked him if it was true."
"And what did he say?"
"Pretty much what you'd expect out of Ryan. He didn't say anything." He turned to face his parents, almost glaring at them. "I'm not some little kid. I could have handled it. You should have told me the truth. He's my friend."
"We're sorry, son," Sandy said, and took a seat next to Seth. "You're right. We shouldn't have asked you to do all the things we did, without giving you our reasons why. But in our defense, we weren't positive about it ourselves."
"And you're sure now?"
"Yes. That's where I went this evening. I hired a private eye to find out more about Ryan and Art. I met with him in my office, and he told me some pretty terrible things about how Art treats Ryan."
"So what are you going to do about it?"
"Honestly? We're not really sure yet."
"You've got to do something. You can't let him go back there. It isn't right."
"We know that, Seth. But it isn't as easy as it should be. As much as I'd like to see Art behind bars, we've got to have Ryan's cooperation. You, your mom, me, we've all tried to talk to Ryan about his stepfather, and we've gotten nowhere. He has a lot of reason not to trust anyone. It's not going to be easy to get him to open up."
"Maybe I could try again. Maybe, he'd trust me over an adult."
Sandy smiled sadly and placed his hand on Seth's shoulder. "Thank you, son. We appreciate it, but this is something your mother and I need to deal with right now. I know it doesn't sound fair, but I want you to go upstairs."
Seth opened his mouth to protest.
"Let me explain. I understand your point that Ryan may feel more comfortable talking to you over me. However, kids in circumstances like these are often embarrassed."
"What's he got to be embarrassed about?"
"Nothing. But think about it from Ryan's point of view. For the most part, he tried to come across to you as this really cool tough guy. He doesn't want anyone to know the truth about what his step-dad does to him. It's probably very hard for him to admit that he's that vulnerable. I promise we won't keep any more secrets from you about Ryan. But I think it's best if you wait upstairs while we talk to him."
"Well, okay. But just to let you know, since we're not supposed to be keeping secrets about Ryan, I'm planning on eavesdropping at the top of the stairs and I'm coming down if I think you, or more importantly, Ryan needs me."
Sandy chuckled softly to himself. "I already knew that, but thank you. It's very reassuring to know you're close."
Sandy and Kirsten watched their son leave.
"I'm pretty proud of our son sometimes, honey."
"Me, too," Kirsten replied and gave her husband a quick hug. "Do you want me to go get Ryan?"
"No. You'd better let me do it."
"But he's scared of you."
"I know. I know. I still think it would be best if I go. If he's going to trust me enough to help him, he's got to trust me enough to at least walk across the patio alone with him. Don't worry, like Seth, I know you're only a few feet away if I need help."
ocococococococococ
Sandy knocked on the pool house doors. He could see Ryan lying down on the bed, his back facing the doorway. He knocked once more before entering and sitting down on the nearest wicker chair.
"Hey, kid."
No movement from the bed.
"Come one, kid. I know you're not asleep. Seth said you've only been out here a few minutes and it's not even ten o'clock yet."
Still no movement.
"All right, then. If this is how you want to be, so be it. We're going to have a talk - about a lot of things. This talk will include your knowledge of purse snatching, car stealing, and without a doubt, this talk will include your stepfather and his treatment of you. This little fake-sleeping act of yours is giving you about a nine hour reprieve from that talk, but believe you me, it's going to happen. Tomorrow morning, whether you like it or not, we are going to have a very long discussion, and you will be expected to talk...a lot, and answer our questions. Got it?"
Ryan remained motionless.
"I'm going to take that as a yes," Sandy said as he stood up. "Oh, and by the way, Kirsten and I know you were planning on running away last night."
Sandy saw Ryan's shoulders stiffen.
"And just to let you know, I wouldn't get any similar ideas for tonight. You may have noticed that this pool house is pretty much entirely made of glass. And if you look straight ahead, you can see our bedroom, which also has a wall of glass. We have a lovely view of the ocean, the pool, and this pool house. We will be keeping an eye on you tonight, and just in case that's not enough, I'm letting the guards at the gate know that they are to call me if you get within twenty feet of the gates."
He walked to the door.
"Good night, Ryan. Sleep well. We'll talk in the morning."
tbc