Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls...

AN: I know! I'm horrible! I've neglected you badly! And I feel terrible... School kind of didn't leave time for much else...and then when I had time..the words just didn't come... I wrote this chapter...then re-wrote it... But here it is... finaly! I wanted to thank you all for your wonderful reviews...they keep me going...really :) I hope you like this chapter...especially because it took me a while to get it on paper (so to speak)... Well without further due (I've kept you waiting way too long already)... Chapter 11. :) Read and review!

Chapter 11: The bend in the road is not the end

Rory took a deep breath. She was standing in the driveway of the Dragonfly Inn. Her heart was pounding. Would she dare to go in and confront her? Her fingers were clenching around her car keys. She exhaled and ordered her feet to move. It was Michel who was reorganizing the post its on the front desk.

"Hey Michel," she greeted with a weak smile.

"Oh hellow," he greeted with a heavy French accent. "Eef eet eesn't the spawn of Satán…"

His cynicism made her relax a bit. Good ol' Michel.

"So how have you been?" she asked fidgeting with her bag.

"Don't you see that I'm beezy, child?! Now stop botthereen mee and go awayyy." he shooed her away with a flawlessly manicured hand.

"I'm looking for mom." She said softly.

"And whuat am I?! Your secretaryyy?" he snorted, "I don't theenk sooo…"

"Michel," Rory sighed rolling her eyes.

"Are you stuupeeed?! I said No! Go look for hur your lonesome selfe! What doo you theenk?" he then asked, giddy like a five year old "Peenk for confeermations, yellow for cancellations and blue for 'yet to confeerm' oooor yellow for confirmations, peenk for 'yet to confeerm', and blue for cancellations?"

Rory furrowed her eyebrows: "I think blue for cancellations, pink for confirmations and yellow for 'not yet confirmed'."

Michel glared at her from across his desk.

"Ceetee girl… No style, no notheeng."

"That's not nice." she snickered. "I'm going to look for mom. Bye"

"Bye…" he said in a tired tone and then added. "I theenk she ees een the keetchen."

"Thank you, Michel!" she laughed walking past the main staircase. It was impossible not to love Michel. She turned to enter the kitchen and stopped. All the gathered courage flowed out of her and scurried away in to opposite directions like a pack of hunted squirrels.

"M-mom…" she stuttered. Lorelai's initial surprise got soon replaced by hurt, masked in anger. Her mouth was a straight line, her eyes cold.

She didn't say anything just crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"I wanted to explain…" she meekly continued, looking at the floor. That woman sure as hell could be intimidating at times. Lorelai raised her eyebrows.

"And apologize."

"You don't need to do either of those. You are after all grown up and you don't need me so why should you apologize?" Her mothers words stung bad, yet she swallowed her tears.

"I should have been honest from the start, but… I was scared….and…"

"And here I thought you were so grown up. You don't just live in your own head, Rory!

The population is not one! Your actions affect other people!"

"I know…" she replied as her eyes filled with tears. "And I want to explain myself. I know that won't change anything, but you … I owe you that much."

"I frankly don't want to see you right now. Nor talk to you. You hurt me! And truthfully you disappointed me. Have the decency to let it sink."

Rory wiped away her cheeks, suddenly full of new élan. Her eyes locked on her mothers.

"Well that's too bad, because I'm not leaving till you let me explain. And since I disappointed you I have no decency… this wont hurt it more."

Lorelai was speechless. She had wanted to sting her back, the way she had stung her… but the girl – young woman- standing in front of her wouldn't have it. Her blue eyes were not only filled with tears, but with sheer determination. This was not the confrontation shy Rory, her sweet sheltered daughter. This was…She sighed. She didn't know who it was anymore and that made her sad. She had questioned herself all the way home from Yale that faithful day, all night in bed…crying… Had she done something wrong? Provoked such behavior or simply been blind?

She passed her, then stopped and turned around.

"Coffee?" she asked.

Rory let out a breath she didn't know she was holding and followed her mother in to the lounge.

"So the prospects for the next 5 years are pretty good IF and I add IF we cut on the expenses…"

Logan was leaning back in a leather chair, 30 stories high, in a conference room in Chicago. His mind was anywhere but Chicago though. He watched the snowflakes lazily fall out of the grey sky and couldn't help but wonder what had come over him that morning. He had almost said something, that hadn't even crossed his mind until now.

Did he love her? He felt stupid for even having to think about it, but it was not like had to compare it to anything. Was it love he was feeling? It irritated him when he noticed that she had shaven her legs with his razor (yet again), when she stole his bathrobe (for the millionth time) and look better in it than he ever could, when she alphabetized his dvd collection ( it was his mess and should remain strictly his mess). When she was in his apartment, she was everywhere. He could still smell her perfume after days. Everything was the same, yet slightly different and he didn't know whether he liked it or was annoyed by it. But on the other hand he wanted to guard her and protect her. He hated seeing her sad. Sometimes he spent half the night watching her. Just watching her sleep. Inhale and exhale. And his own breathing would adapt to hers… Breathing in and out at the same time she did. He missed her when she wasn't in his bed when he woke up, or went to sleep. It was even strange when her toothbrush wasn't in the same cup as his. Without her the apartment seemed quiet and too big. Was it love? Or just an addiction?

Lorelai crossed her arms in front of her chest and steered her gaze to her daughter, who was facing her from the opposite chair, timid and unwavering at the same time.

"I met him last year." She started." He was an arrogant, self-involved, infuriating brat, born into a golden crib. He didn't have to work for anything, nor did he appreciate anything. I hated him. He represented everything you hated about Hartford. For a while it remained that way…him goading me… me ignoring him," she smirked involuntarily, "as far as it is possible to ignore Logan Huntzberger. And then I started doing research for this article on the Life and Death Brigade." Lorelai raised her eyebrows.

"Don't even ask…What I found led straight to him. I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry out of misery. I asked for his help and against all odds he said yes." Rory looked at her mother, trying to gauge her mood, but she was plainly staring back at her. She took it as a silent sign to continue.

"He brought me to this outrageous event. It was unlike anything I had ever seen and just when I thought that it couldn't get anymore crazy he persuaded me to jump of a 7 storied scaffolding with him. "It'll be fun, it'll be a thrill," he had said, "Something stupid, something bad for you. Just something different. Isn't this the point of being young? It's your choice, Ace. People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute. You climb up here with me, it's one less minute you haven't lived" He got me wondering … was I too sheltered, too serious?"

"You jump, I jump, Jack." She had said, clasping her hand in his, standing high above the ground, the wind playing with the blue of her dress and then they had jumped. When they had touched the ground, just seconds later, adrenaline was rushing, the crowd was cheering and she had his hand still firmly in her grip, pressed against her chest, that was raising and falling heavily. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes vivid. She had taken a chance… He smirked at the memory… a minute less lived. Was he a hypocrite? Telling her that she needed to take a chance, risk a little and now not daring himself? He was risking his heart here, she had risked her health in the worst case. Not true… He fixated his stare on a drop of melted snow on the window and followed it's path down. She had risked her believes. She had risked her life as she had known it. In omnia paratus… He sighed. Aut vincere aut mori (AN: Either conquer or die)…
"And I did. I literally took the plunge. It felt amazing… It was as if the foundation of my being had been shaken to it's core. And in a way he was a part of it. I don't know whether it was because of his words or that he didn't let go of my hand, but he was a part of it…of me, or was I a part of him of the moment. It still confuses me. After that there was this connection between us. This feeling of mutual understanding. When he would look at me it felt as if we had a secret that was only known to us. I couldn't hate him anymore. I'm not sure if I ever did. I simply didn't understand him. It took me a long while to really do that. The mystery about him, it was as if he was hiding and not coming out, except if it was to play. His remarks, his attitude were all a play for him and I desperately wanted to know the rules, see what was behind him… And one day he came to my dorm…and… we…" She paused contemplating how to bring that.

"Had sex." Lorelai finished and caused her daughter to alter 5 shades of red, before nodding slightly.

"The next morning I was in heaven and he was sorry, going on and on about caring about me and not wanting to hurt me. I put my foot down. And he warned me… he warned me. And I wouldn't have it. I wanted him. A part of him. Whatever I could get, because he made me feel…like I was standing at the brink of that scaffolding. And it was new for me…chasing after a guy. Dean put me on a pedestal and Jess wasn't sure how to deal with me, so he walked on his toes for a while before bolting. Logan simply saw me. And it felt so good to be seen…really seen. When he is with me…I feel special."

She took a deep breath, a lump forming in her throat.

"So we kept seeing each other for about 5 months like that. Occasional dinners, movies, nights spent together… Then one day he asked me to this benefit. And at that time I was ready to break it off, because well, I fell in love him and it frustrated me that he was so introvert… I only could see the surface of him and the other girls..." she sighed. It had been only a week. It seemed years ago. "In New York it came to a burst."

She mulled whether to tell Lorelai about his mother and decided against it. It was not relevant at this point.

"What he had warned me about happened. I freaked out. He didn't understand why at first so I practically screamed that I loved him. It's a little blurry… but he held me and things were said… and he agreed to commit to me. The week following that it was like getting to know him all over again. I still am…And he is just human. It felt good to know that he has his insecurities and fears…You know the rest," she sighed.

Lorelai wanted to gather her in her arms, wanted to hold her. Her girl had been through so much, but what she couldn't grasp was: Why? Why hadn't she told her? They always shared everything. She felt shut out…and angry.

"Why, Rory? You telling me this story, all nice and charming. A regular fairy tale, but why didn't you tell me?! 5 months! You lied to me for 5 months…"

"Logan…. Logan…. LOGAN!"

Logan's head shot up and his fathers booming voice echoed in his ears.

"Yes?"

"Are you brain dead?" Mitchum asked.

"Not that I recall.." He was still a little frazzled from his long pause of contemplating.

"Then stop staring out of that window like a damn invalid and pay attention…"

Logan took a deep breath and steered his eyes to the syllabus in front of his nose. Charts, data… He knew it all inside out and it didn't do anything. He simply didn't care. The irony was, that he was good at it. If he put his mind to it, he could be great. But he didn't WANT to put his mind to it. He wanted… what DID he want? He had no clue, but not this, not now. Only the thought of sitting in some glass prison tower made him sick. Graduation was creeping up to him and it felt as if hands were slowly clenching around his throat…tighter and tighter… Was this how a burn out felt? Burn-out… He hadn't even started, or maybe he had way too early. He could remember so well… Him 6, maybe 7, sitting on his fathers desk, stapling something… It had felt wonderful back then, being around him, watching him. He had felt pride. THAT IS MY DAD, radiating from his face. Long lost times… Times he missed on one hand and wished that they had never happened on the other…Now it was only cause for melancholia.

"LOGAN!!! MY GOD are you high on something?!"

"I just didn't want you to be disappointed in me. I didn't want to let you down…" Rory cried. It was to no avail to stop. Once the first tear had fought it's way down the rest followed uncontrollably.

"Let me down???" Lorelai asked incredulously.

"Yes. Logan is everything you ran away from, everything you despise and then your perfect daughter was casually sleeping around. You would have been so disheartened. And you are! I mean..."

"Rory, I never…"

"And the more time went by, the harder it became. I just couldn't face you."

A lone tear made it's way down Lorelai's face. Disappointment was not something she was feeling. It was mostly hurt. But disappointment. Never. The love for the younger Gilmore Girl was unconditional.

"Hon, you could never disappoint me! Never! You could swear off coffee! Eat green stuff! Tattoo "I love Mom" on your butt! Join the Hells Angels….I would never ever be disappointed in you. I love you…Always always… it's the fact that you didn't tell me that disappointed me … not you. And the way I feel about Hartford… I never meant to indoctrinate you with my hate of the elite. And I don't hate them. It's just I needed that cynicism to survive."

"Well you didn't… Indoctrinate me. And if you did, you did a bad job at that… I don't think you would fit the profile for a SD-6 agent."

Lorelai smirked.

"I'm so so so so so so so so so incredibly sorry, mom." Rory cried launching herself into her mothers embrace.

"Me too, kid, me too.." she whispered in her daughters hair. It was going to be ok. Rory cried out of relieve and out of sorrow, out of happiness and simply just because she felt like it. It was going to be ok…

"Would you for once in your lifetime stop embarrassing me?!" Mitchum hissed, "What is wrong with you?"

"There is nothing wrong…" Logan sighed, stirring his coffee.

"At least ACT like you want to be here."

"Well I don't want to be here!"

"Grow up! Really… Grow up! It's getting old those teenage tantrums you keep throwing. Grow up! Stop being such a goddamn disappointment!" Logan shook his head in disbelieve.

"I never said I wanted to be here. I never said I wanted to do anything with this at all. You want me to be here? I'm here! You want me read the goddamn prospect? I have! You want me to like it?"

"You are a Huntzberger! It's in your blood! YES, I want you to like it!" the man rumbled.

"Well TOO BAD! You can get me to do a lot of things, but I decide for myself whether I like it or not!" Whether I like you, or not! "Which I don't. So up yours really." He sipped from his coffee.

"Sir, are you ready to proceed?" the secretary asked. Logan threw his father a look.

"Yes, the sooner we start this charade, the sooner we finish and the sooner I can get out of this hellhole." He then said and left his father in the lounge. He felt like colliding a fist with a wall and clenched his fists till his knuckles were white. The slight vibration in his pocket made him loosen his hands. He pulled his phone out and flipped it open. Ace…

Mom and me… I think we are ok. :) I don't know what to do with myself I'm so happy… How is Chicago? xxx Needy pushy girlfriend.

He chuckled and let himself down in the leather chair again.

Well there you go. I'm happy for you, needy pushy girlfriend. I hate it here… It's worse than the 9th circle of hell… Did you lock the door? L.

Rory snickered upon reading Logan's response to her text and couldn't help but feel bad for him. She put the DVD in the player and hopped on the couch, tucking her feet under her body and started texting him back.

"I have….wine gums, marshmallows, pop corn…sweet and sour. I have chocolate, cookie dough, Skittles… taste the rainbow, baby. I have chips and well the usual really." Lorelai exclaimed dumping massive amounts of food on the coffee table and plopping down on the couch next to Rory.

"Logan?" she asked. It was going to take some time, getting used to Rory seeing that boy.

"Yeah…" Rory smiled. "He is in Chicago or according to him the ninth circle of hell."

Lorelai gave a little smile.

"So you love him…" Rory nodded. Still slightly uncomfortable.

"Does he love you?"

"Sometimes I get the feeling he does and then there are moments when I'm not sure. He has never voiced it, but then again, he's not really the touchy feely kind of guy."

Lorelai took a deep breath.

"I would like to meet him…some day. In the 5th circle of hell… or the 4th, either is fine really."

"You would." Rory deadpanned.

"Yeah… I have to meet the guy that you claim to love."

"Ok…" A handful of wine gums disappeared in her mouth. It felt strange. It was going to take some time getting used to her mom knowing Logan.

Lorelai pressed 'PLAY' and the title song of Gone with the Wind filled the living room.

Poor you. I think the friendly squatters are grilling mice in your fireplace. Needy pushy girlfriend signing off… Gone with the Wind time. Her eyes flew over the lines and she pressed SEND, focusing her full attention on Scarlett O'Hara once more.

Logan was beat. Chicago wasn't big enough to house Mitchum Huntzberger. 4 days, 3 nights, 2 flights and one Mitchum Huntzberger later all he wanted to do was crawl in bed and sleep for a century. But going back to an empty apartment just didn't seem appealing after all. It was closing to 2 am and he contemplated whether knocking on Rory's door would inflict bodily harm. He decided to take his chances and strolled to Branford, breathing in the cool February air and letting his annoyance defrost a little. He knocked sturdily and waited. When no answer came, he knocked again.

A faint shuffling could be heard on the other end, some fidgeting at the door and then the door opened revealing a barely awake Rory. Her cheeks were pink with sleep, like those of a baby. Her hair resembled Chernobyl and she was wearing the disastrous bright orange flannel pajamas with singing penguins on it. He smiled.

"Hey…" he said.

"Hey…" she yawned.

"The squatters are occupying my bed."

She snickered and opened the door further to let him in. He took of his coat, carelessly draping it over the couch and kicked of his shoes, before wrapping his arms around her orange manifestation, pulling her close and burying his nose in her hair, inhaling her scent.

"Are you sniffing me?" she asked with raised eyebrows.

"And what if I am? I don't want to hear any comments from you, Booksniffer."

"Hey! I provide your bed for tonight…be nice." She pouted, sneakily taking in his scent as well.

"I missed you, Ace…"

"Yeah… I would miss me too."

"All the drama is gone, so now miss. Perky has her wit back." He pinched her side, she let out a displeased grunt.

"Fine…" she rolled her eyes, "If we are on the cheesy tour… I missed you too." Logan snickered giving her a brief kiss.

"You look drained," she observed taking in the dark circles under his eyes and the absence of the vivid spark in them.

"I feel drained." In silence she pulled the blazer of his shoulders.

"Crawl back in bed…" he said, "I can undress myself."

"Don't fall asleep standing there." she said walking back to her bedroom and crawling under the covers.

Logan finished undressing leaving his clothes scattered on the living room floor. Rory felt the bed shift when he lied down and tried to find a comfortable position on the twin sized bed. When he didn't stop squirming and twisting Rory sighed and pulled him in her arms.

"You need a bigger bed…" he stated.

"No I don't" she sighed running her fingers through his hair. "Sleep…"

"Yes you…do…" he protested his voice getting distant.

"No I don't. This bed is just fine…" She smirked, still stroking his soft hair.

"No….It's not….It's…too…." he couldn't find the strength to finish the sentence. All of his remaining brain activity was focused on the warm bed and Rory's gentle hands, as that too became blurry and he drifted into a deep dreamless sleep.

TBC...