A/N: continuing from last chapter ladies, ooh Randy been suspended. Anyone know what he did?
Chapter 12 - Coffee overload!
John left the tent and swore he could see it shaking when they giggled. "Damn woman." He muttered as he turned off, down into the next aisle. For some reason he found himself looking straight at a red headed diva sitting in a shopping cart. The charismatic enigma pushing her along.
"John! John! Pass me the tomato juice!" Amy yelled, without questioning the diva John handed her a carton of tomato juice from the shelf. She opened it and tipped it upside down. "To the rest room, Jeffy Boy!" She giggled in delight as the multicoloured high flyers zoomed off down the aisle leaving a trail of red liquid behind them.
"Insane." John muttered as he headed into the next aisle. "Toys." He read from the sign above him. He looked down the aisle to find his best friends, Randy Orton and Dave Batista. "Hey guys."
"But I wanna be me!" Randy squealed.
"Shut up, ya baby." Dave replied throwing the Legend Killer action figure at the real life Legend Killer. "I'll be Undertaker than!"
"Oh god, not again." Randy ran off in the other direction, at the end of the aisle he fell head over heels at the help of Amy and Jeff's little accident.
"Oh sweet Jesus, I am not with you people." John walked into the next aisle, and decided to walk down it when he saw Trish. "Hey girl."
"Do you think this is muh colour?" Trish asked holding up a box of blonde hair dye. "Ya know where Ry, and the girls are?"
"Well, Amy happens to be in a shopping cart," John carried on regardless of the look of confusion on the diva's face. "And Ry and Laura are currently camping out in a tent in aisle 7."
"Should I even bother asking where Randy and Dave are?" Trish laughed.
"Orton's on his back and last time I looked, the big man was hovering over him." John smirked.
"And what about Matt and Rey?" Trish said putting the hair dye back on the shelf.
"I don't quite know yet, ya wanna find out?" John said as they started to move to the next aisle. Yet another toy aisle, but this one was bigger, sectioned off from the rest of the shop because of the giant displace it housed. A colossal bouncy castle.
"Oh dear God." Trish sighed as she caught sight of three highflying superstars. "Rey rey baby, come off the kid's toy." Trish coaxed the short Mexican off the bouncy castle with her finger. "It's up to you to get dumb and dumber off." The blonde diva pointed at the two Hardy Boyz bouncing around, looking as if they had the mental age capacity of three year olds. The luchador followed the Canadian bombshell around the corner into the next aisle. When completely out of sight, John swore he heard the small man yelp.
"Right, come on, we gotta go now. Matt, Ashley'll be waiting for ya at the hotel. "Wait, Jeff where's Amy?" John stood in front of the gigantic castle with his hands on his hips, in some sort of attempt to look fatherly.
"Crashed, into a bean display." Jeff stated simply. "Man over board, had to leave her." Jeff continued to bounce.
"I don't wanna know." John sighed, he hung his head and out of the corner of his eye he spotted something that could lure the brothers off the bouncy castle. He grabbed it and held it in front of him. "Yo, guys look what I got."
"Ooh, Ben & Jerry's!" Jeff giggled in delight bouncing off the castle, closely followed by his brother. "Hand it over John." Jeff smiled sweetly; his smile slowly disappeared as the champion ran off down the aisle, waving the tub of ice cream above his head.
"If ya want some," He smirked. "Come get some!" John ran as fast as possible, weaving in and out of other customers in an attempt to keep both men near by.
"John this isn't fair!" Jeff wailed from behind him. John skidded back down an aisle. Aisle 7, the one that housed a tent at the bottom of it. He managed to dive head first into the tent after unzipping its door.
"Now hey I said you had to bring pillows to get in here!" Laura yelled at the champ as Rylee sat behind her, French plaiting the girl's long dark brown hair.
"But I brought ice cream." John offered, with a hopeful smile on his face he held out the tub of Ben & Jerry's.
"What no spoons?" Rylee yelled. "Get out! Get out now!" Rylee speared John back out of the tent, Laura following them. Rylee and Laura stood up, brushed themselves off, and made a run for the next aisle. John started to run after them but got slightly sidetracked when he heard a near by clothes rack giggle. He walked slowly towards it, reaching out to touch a t shirt when it was hauled back and three highflying superstars jumped out.
"PICK ME!" Jeff yelled. John was about to reply by slapping the three's heads when a livid red head appeared.
"Jeffery Nero Hardy! You left me to swim in a lake of beans!" She whispered off. "BEANS! For Christ's sake!" Amy screamed waving her arms around her body to show her tomato sauce splattered clothes and her bean matted hair. Matt and Rey stood pointing and laughing at the fiery diva.
"Oh good God." John attempted to stop a laugh escape his lips, which only angered the red head further. John was about to run away from Amy when Rylee and Laura reappeared. Laura stood cradling six or seven yellow bouncy balls in her arms, she threw every one of them straight at John.
"Go Pikachu Go!"
"Ahh! That was muh forehead!" John yelled back.
"Oh shut up ya big baby." Rylee caught sight of her best friend. "Oh sweet mother of flying pigs. Aimes, what happened to you?"
"We," Amy replied pointing at herself and Jeff, "crashed."
"Okay then. Can we go back to the hotel now?" Rylee pleaded with John, knowing that she would win. She kissed his forehead where Laura had attacked him with the bouncy balls.
"Yeah, this is way too much craziness for one day." John laughed throwing Rylee over his shoulder. "We need to find the others first." Randy and Dave walked up the aisle. Randy smirked and grabbed Laura to throw her over his shoulder, same as John and Rylee. Dave took one look at Amy, covered in beans; she gave him the don't-even-bother-asking look, so he threw her over his shoulder and walked over to John and Randy.
"Where we going?" Randy asked.
"Hotel." An upside down Rylee replied.
"Okie dokie then." Dave replied, watching his former tag team partner attempt to run away from the charismatic enigma.
"Come on Rey-rey!" Jeff chuckled.
"No man I aint getting on ya back!" Rey kept making attempts at dodging the multicoloured man.
"Rey, get ya ass back here!" Jeff yelled pulling the luchador back by his pants and throwing him up over his shoulder.
"Jeff! Put me down! Matt help me!" Rey pounded his fists off Jeff's back, pleading with his kidnapper's brother.
"Nah, wait, there's Trish." Matt pointed ahead. The blonde Canadian was stood in the middle of a group of male sales assistants and bored male shoppers.
"So are you for sale?" Trish asked winking at one of them.
"She's ours!" Matt yelled throwing the former women's champion over his shoulder. All the men walking in a row, making in easier for all of the captives to plot their kidnapper's deaths.
"Matty! Put me down! I'll set Ashley on ya!" Trish giggled.
"Nope!" He replied bluntly. The men carried their victims through the shop, Rylee brushed up against a shelf; she quickly picked up the box in front of her upside down form. A box of condoms. She opened the box and passed some along the line of victims, all of them randomly throwing the condoms into various shopping carts when the shopper wasn't looking.
"What are you lot doing back there?" Dave asked as Amy giggled slightly too loud.
As the group walked by, Laura received a filthy look from a jealous sales assistant Laura managed to wriggle out of the Legend Killer's grip, flipping herself down and landing safety on her feet. She walked up to the sales assistant, tapped her on the shoulder and waited for her to turn around. "Could you please tell me where I can find the bitch be gone spray?" Laura asked in a sickly sweet voice. The gang had stopped and turned to watch Laura. The sales assistant raised an eyebrow.
"Why would you want to get rid of yourself?" She smirked; Laura looked over the girl's uniform, finding her name tag. 'Becky.' Becky seemed quite proud of her self, she turned to walk away.
"She should not have said that." Amy whispered to Rylee.
"I know." Rylee whispered back, smirking.
"Oi Becky!" Laura charged after the girl, she lay her hand on Becky's shoulder spinning her around. "Bite this." Laura smirked, pulling back her arm, clenching her fist and letting it loose, across the girl's face. Becky stumbled back, holding her nose.
"Oh my god! You've broke muh nose!" Becky cried.
"Ah well, Daddy'll just have to pay for another nose job then." Laura smirked before walking down the aisle and out of the shop.
The gang quickly followed, four out of the original five captives still on their kidnapper's shoulders. "Jeff, I reckon you can put me down now." Rey said through gritted teeth.
"Oh yeah, sorry lil man, I forgot you were still up there. What with you being so small and all." Jeff chuckled as he set the short Mexican down on his feet.
"We resent that comment." Laura smiled, "Don't we Rey."
"John, can you put me down now?" Rylee asked from somewhere near the West Newbury native's backside.
"Nope."
"Fine then." Rylee replied with a smirk on her face, she swung her legs, kneeing him in the chest and pounded her fists on his ass. He let her down. "Dead ass?"
"Yeah." John groaned holding his injured backside.
"Can we get going now? I told Ash and the other girls I'd go out with them tonight." Trish whined.
"Lets go then. Er, Laura. You're with me." Rylee and Laura scurried into Rylee's McLaren F1. They sat for a few minutes while the rest of the gang got into the remaining rental cars. Once everyone was ready, Laura picked up the walkie-talkie from the floor of the car.
Laura: Well ladies we are back on the road…
Randy: Which button do I press…
Trish: This kid is killing me over here…
Laura: Who…
Amy: RANDY YOU ARE AN IDIOT…
Laura: Oh him…
Randy: What about me…
Amy: Nothing, go back to ya box…
Randy: It is a very comfortable box I'll have you ladies know…
Laura: Randall shut up…
Randy: Sowry…
Trish: Are we there yet…
Amy: No…
Trish: How bout now…
Laura: No…
Trish: Now…
Randy: No Trish…
Trish: Okay then…
PAUSE
Trish: What about now…
Randy, Amy and Laura: NO…
Trish: Geez, calm down…
Laura: In all seriousness, are we there yet…
Amy: AHHH! Actually yeah we are…
Randy: Out…
Trish: Out…
Amy: Out…
Laura: Out women…
All four cars pulled into the hotel's underground parking lot. All four cars cut their engines. And all four cars passengers spilled out of them, collected their luggage and headed up to the reception desk to get their room keys.
"Well, I don't think we'll be allowed back in there any time soon." Amy giggled referring to every Wal-Mart in the state.
A/N: I am sleep deprived so I am sorry now If this chapter sucks ass completely. I blame the person that poured the vodka down muh throat last night. Luv to all muh reviewers, and if ya haven't already reviewed please drop by in the review box, ya know it's a comfy lil box. Loadsa thanx to scarlette xx ShatteredFaith latingurl1523 mrscena4u and of course wonderouswardy who by the way is the original Laura, and most expressions used are original wardy remarks.