A Battle of Land and Sea

Chapter Six

"It's the quiet night that breaks me,

I cannot stand the sight of this familiar place,

It's the quiet night that breaks me,

Like a dozen paper cuts that only I can trace"

"Carry the weight

I'll carry the weight of you, I swear

Carry the weight

I'll carry the weight of you"

Vienna Teng, "Nothing Without You" and "Enough To Go By"

The girl sat down on the bed with a thud. With her arms crossed, she stared at the insolent man above her. He didn't seem to mind though; the amused grin on his face was enough to show he didn't take her glare too seriously. She watched as he made his way towards her and bent down to delicately take off her shoes and thoughtlessly discard them across the floor. The sentiment was nearly there, but it was obvious that putting things neatly didn't seem to be his top priority right now.

She stayed in her rigid state as she saw him lean towards her and felt his lips brush her cheek as he kissed her before placing a hand delicately on her stomach.

"Stay." he softly ordered before standing and leaving the room.

It was when he left that Selphie let out an exasperated sigh. They were back home, away from Garden and the infirmary where she had spent the last few hours. Someone had found her on the floor and taken her to the infirmary where she simply lied there, feeling helpless as Dr Kadowaki checked to see if she and her baby were okay. It appeared that Selphie had cushioned most of the fall and that everything was fine, the extent of her injuries nothing more than a bruised behind. That she could handle. It was better than if…

She sat up slightly as she listened to the clattering noises throughout the house. She had no idea what Irvine was doing down there and a big part of her wasn't sure she wanted to know. Leaning back once more, she found herself picking up a magazine and idly flicking through it. Irvine had insisted that they go home and that she rest.

Unfortunately for her, that 'rest' would mean that she wouldn't be allowed to move from this spot the next six hours save for bathroom breaks. While she knew that Irvine worried more than he cared to let on, she also knew that it was because he loved her and their unborn child.

…Than if something had happened to her baby.

The thought finished itself off, came fluttering back even though she had tried to push it to the back of her mind. She was usually good at distracting herself away from her worries, but not this time.

What would she have done if something had gone wrong?

That scared her more than anything. Although she had never met this beautiful being growing inside of her, she'd already developed a huge bond with it. She loved being pregnant and wanted more than anything to be a parent, but if something were to happen…

That was what had terrified her more than anything.

The familiar sounds of footsteps made their way down the corridor and Selphie found herself drawn away from her thoughts once more as Irvine made his way back into the bedroom. She looked up from the magazine she had shown little interest in to find Irvine placing something down by the bedside table with a smile on his face.

"I made you lunch in bed," he said, almost a little too proudly of his efforts.

" ...Thanks." Selphie said, turning back to the magazine and began flipping through the pages once more. "Toast and orange juice, my favourite," she spoke, words dripping with sarcasm, although her face smiled at him brightly. She loved to tease him.

The cowboy let out a smile as he lay on the bed beside Selphie. "Don't say I never do anything for you."

He watched as his girlfriend's attention stayed focused on her magazine, the only part of her that seemed to acknowledge his words was the hand she used to tentatively pat him on the head like a dog rather than a boyfriend. Regardless, the gesture still managed to amuse him.

"How's my boy doing?" he asked, lying on the bed beside her as he placed his head on her belly. "Is he doing okay since the tumble you had?"

"She's doing fine," Selphie narrowed her eyes in mock anger before letting out a giggle.

Neither of them cared about what gender their baby was and had chosen to keep it a surprise for when the day came they would find out. Just as long as everything was safe and fine, that was all they worried about.

Safety.

Perhaps that was another reason why she wanted to turn her life well away from Garden, but then again, that was a haunting thought she wouldn't speak out for quite a while.

"He's a fighter," Irvine chuckled at his girlfriend's reaction, "Must have inherited it from his mother."

"Sure did." Selphie agreed. Her response was simple, but in her head, she couldn't help the surge of thoughts that echoed through her.

How would he react if she told him the truth – that she didn't want her child to be a fighter of any kind? That just wasn't the life she wanted anymore. Would he be angry with her?

She wasn't sure, but what she knew for certain was that today would not be the day she would speak her thoughts aloud. Maybe tomorrow she would tell him, or next week...just not today. It was too soon.

A comforting silence fell over the couple as they lay on the bed in their house. Everything that surrounded them was shared. They had built their relationship up so much over the last few years that it was almost scary just how easily everything had gone.

Perhaps it was because they were both so laid back, or maybe they complimented each other well with their different personalities. For now, everything was strong, they were okay. As long as she didn't say what was in her heart, everything would be fine, wouldn't it?

Following the same old routine was the safest route to go right now. No life-changing decisions being voiced whatsoever.

"What do you think happened in Rinoa's room today?" Selphie spoke up, effectively breaking the silence. Somehow dealing with another's problems seemed so much easier than her own, no matter how much her own disturbed her. "It seems a little weird... don't you think?"

Irvine shrugged, "According to Cid, it's not the first time there's been a robbery. It only takes one person to do something like that and Rinoa's dorm was the unfortunate room that was picked by the guy. They'll find out who he is and throw him out of Garden. Don't worry about it."

But Selphie did worry...a lot. She remembered the flowers on the floor, those same flowers that she had found outside Rinoa's door the day before. It almost made her shudder to remember the haunted look in Rinoa's eyes.

That's what it had been hadn't it?

Selphie had mistaken it for grief at the time, but looking back now, it must have been fear Rinoa's eyes were coloured with. Was there something going on?

"Something doesn't add up though," she said, "Rinoa's been acting strangely, she's not herself at all."

Irvine lifted his head towards Selphie, "She's grieving, remember? What are you suggesting happened?"

Shrugging her shoulders, Selphie shook her head. "I don't know," she said. "While she does seem have a lot on her plate right now...something's still off. Maybe I shouldn't tell her what happened."

"She doesn't know?" Irvine asked. He saw Selphie shake her head slowly, a guilty look forming in her features. "I guess there's no point worrying her right now. Maybe we should tell Squall at least?"

Tossing her magazine to the side of her, Selphie rubbed her belly, something that had become a habit during her pregnancy. "That sounds like a good idea." And then slowly, almost inaudibly, she spoke again. "It just feels like something is really wrong."

"There is something wrong," Irvine spoke; his gaze distant and fixated on the ceiling above them. "The best thing we can do is be there for her. It's hit her hard, anyone can see that. While it's not like they had the best relationship in the world, I'm sure she still has a lot to deal with."

"Yeah," Selphie responded, pushing her hair behind an ear. "And unfortunately, she'll have a lot more to deal with when she finds out what's happened today."

Steps collided with the cobbled driveway as the young girl made her way up the driveway. Her steps became faster as she saw her destination finally coming into view. She let out a small smile as she looked up at the blue sky. It was an unusually hot day and even though it was turning into late afternoon, the sun still gave off powerful heat waves, never seeming to lose strength as the day was coming to an end.

Adjusting her school bag on her shoulders, she managed to take those final steps towards the door. Normally, she would have taken the bus but since today was such a nice day, she decided to walk. Although it was quite far, she didn't mind; not today anyway. The sun seemed to be shining brightly and after having such a long day at school, she felt the need to take a more scenic route home.

The soldiers stood at the doorstep as they always did, nodding nonchalantly just like they did every day as she made her way through the door. Once inside, she placed her bag down on the floor, finally feeling glad that it was Friday and that she would have the weekend ahead of her. Once again, picking up the heavy bag, she began walking once more towards the steps which led up to her room, humming a tune in her head at the same time.

"You're late."

The young girl turned around, startled by the sudden voice from behind her. And seeing the figure of the man stood in the doorway, her good mood instantly dissolved into nothingness. His shirt half-hung out of his trousers scruffily and his hair seemed to have developed a life of its own, sitting in an unruly mess. She stood there silently, watching as he took another mouthful of the liquor in his hands.

"Did you not hear me? I said you're late," he growled with more force this time.

Immediately, the young girl took a step back, not wanting to be in his way at seeing his anger. "I'm sorry," she apologized, her head turned to the floor.

A silence passed over father and daughter like a chilling draft, leaving her feeling uncomfortable. She couldn't help holding her breath as she felt his harsh stare burn into her as her gaze stayed firmly on the ground. The twelve year old stayed frozen, waiting for him to move once more. She didn't care what he did right now, just as long as his eyes weren't on her any longer. It was growing unbearable.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw his shadow move slowly towards her and his feet echoing loudly on the wooden floor. She felt the weight of his heavy steps vibrating the ground beneath her feet as he came closer to her. It took all her might for her not to turn and run away from her father. She had not seen him act this way before and she couldn't help the rapidly growing panic rising up inside of her. Something about him just seemed... so different. As he came to a stop momentarily to take a few more big mouthfuls of the alcohol from the bottle in his hands, she watched as he stumbled slightly. The level of concentration he was using to get his balance back shifted to her once more.

Somewhere between his approaching gait and her inner battle to stand still where she was, she had found herself with her eyes tightly closed, adopting the notion that if she couldn't see it, it wasn't there. It was the childish thoughts that somehow seemed to comfort her most in the moments of fear. She could hear her heart beating loudly within her chest, feeling her veins pulsating as the blood rushed through her being.

A loud clatter filled the room, forcing her eyes wide open as she heard a cry of pain. A puddle of amber liquid reached out towards her dampening her shoes. She looked to see her father fallen on the floor from losing his balance, his drunken state seeming more obvious to her now. She watched as he placed his hands on the glass scattered on the floor to aid himself into a standing position. He didn't seem to notice when the shattered remnants of bottle had cut through his skin, causing crimson droplets of liquid to run down his hands like tears. He looked around the floor in a confused daze, and wanting nothing more than another drink.

"Look... look what you've done," he mumbled barely inaudible. He spun a little too fast, and she almost expected him to fall over again. Yet, he seemed to have gained his composure somewhat. His eyes settled on her once more, narrowing slightly. This time, she did not struggle to hear her father's words as he almost spat them in her face.

"Look at what you've made me do!" he screamed.

When she felt the saliva hit her face, she couldn't stay stood still. Her feet started to move, not really sure in what direction they were taking her. It didn't seem to matter the moment she felt his hand clasp tightly around her wrist, dragging her towards him.

"I didn't do anything," she mumbled as the tears now made their way down her cheeks. "You fell over and I don't know. I- I didn't mean to-"

Her words were cut short as she felt herself dragged up the steps. His arms tightened even more on her arm and she found herself unable to do anything but let him lead the way. What had she done? She wasn't entirely sure, but then she had a feeling that she didn't have to do anything wrong for him to act like this. Perhaps he already knew he was taking this out on her. In time, she would learn that this would become his normal drunken ways, but right now, she was scared and alone. As she felt herself being pushed into her room, the tears welled in her eyes from the pain around her wrist.

He stared at her for a moment, almost as if he knew that deep down, his daughter had done nothing wrong, that this was his irrational way of venting out his own inner demons. The thought didn't seem to last long however as the door slammed shut and she stared helplessly at it when she heard a metallic click of a lock. It was at that moment when her legs could no longer carry her weight and she collapsed onto the floor.

"What did I do?" she cried to the door. Her father was already long gone.

It was starting to rain again.

She watched as the first droplets hit the window, the water crashing against the surface of the glass. Below her, the streets which were illuminated by the amber glow of the street lamps which were hit by the first drops of water. It began slowly at first and then it quickly changed into heavier rain, the paths becoming wet and shining under the lights of the city. People ran past in search of shelter away from the rain and the cold wind brewing outside. The wind raced through the trees, swaying them from side to side.

The sky was mainly dark, but in the distance, she could see the purple colours from the last signs of day as the sunset faded into black. She wasn't sure how long she had been standing at the window, watching the sunset and the people below her who were walking through their daily routines, not even aware of the girl looking down at them, simply watching everything go on below her feet as she stood in the silence of the hotel room.

She couldn't even remember the last time she had stayed a night in Deling City.

But those times long ago were visits during day and she was staying here for as long as was needed to sort through everything. To sort the funeral and the many items lying within the walls of his now-empty house.

She felt a shiver run through her and once again, she began looking towards the sky where the glowing orbs above her twinkled in the heavens. She would look for shooting stars, she thought to herself. That was always something that always brought comfort when she needed it most. The blanket of sky above her may have once been the place where, what seemed like a lifetime ago now, she had floated along helplessly, just waiting to die, but it would always be the one thing that would make her feel at least a little more content- when her feet were planted firmly on the ground that is.

She felt the now-almost familiar pangs growing within the pit of her stomach, almost like a piece of her was missing and nothing she did would be able to make it go away. She'd left the house earlier today after being in there a few hours. The memories were almost overpowering her now, like snapshots and mental images of her past life. Things she hadn't thought about, things she hadn't felt in years which were now floating to the surface again. And even worse, she was getting all her childish fears back again. She was having nightmares, she was afraid of the dark, afraid of the thing lurking just behind her... the thing which she hadn't been able to turn around and see. But she had felt its warm breath on her skin. It had felt so real. So vivid... Yes, there were a lot of childish thoughts running through her mind right now.

She turned her attention back down to the streets below and watched as a couple walked past and disappeared out of her view of sight. Letting out a small sigh, she focused her thoughts back on the time at the house. Something had happened there, something had triggered off those childish thoughts of hers. She had run out of the house so fast with her heart pounding in her chest. Thinking back, now she couldn't help but feel slightly stupid at her reaction.

"What do you think of irises?"

There had been a noise, the sound of a door slamming from somewhere within the house. She had heard footsteps walking through the hallway and then a few more steps before everything went silent once again.

Holding a picture in her hands at the time, she stood frozen as a cold chill ran through her. Her heart had skipped a beat and then started up again, louder and harder than before. Her eyes were wide as she waited in the silence of the room until there was another sound – a bang from the same area.

This time, she didn't freeze but the picture fell from her grasp and shattered upon impact with the floor. She bolted to the door, ignoring the guards on the outside of the house. She didn't care what it looked like; all she wanted to do was be as far away from the house as possible right then. She was sure that there was a plausible explanation for the sounds since her father's home always had visitors who came and went. Maybe if she hadn't been so scared she should have stopped and asked one of the... What?

As the voice finally registered, she turned on her heels to face the speaker. He was looking at her expectantly, waiting for an answer. His only response from her was a dazed and confused look as she saw him sitting on the bed with lots of magazine cuttings and pieces of paper scattered all over it. She felt a pang of guilt as she realized that she had been standing by the window, too deep in her thoughts to even notice Squall or what he was doing.

"I'm sorry, what?"

She still looked confused as she began to walk towards him. As she approached the bed, Squall handed her one of the many pieces of paper he had scattered around him. She held it in her hands as if it was a foreign object before turning her eyes at what she saw was a picture on the paper. Raising her eyes back to meet his once more, she couldn't help but feel even more confused. She really had missed a lot whilst being lost in her own thoughts.

"Flowers?"

By the look on his face, she realized that Squall wasn't going to elaborate, making it seem as if it was the most obvious thing in the world for him to hand her a picture of some flowers. Looking onto the bed, she saw piles of different magazine cuts outs and pictures of other flowers scattered over the bed.

"Well done," Squall replied dryly. She noticed his lips upturned slightly in a smile that was barely noticeable but those who knew him well enough could detect when the once- cold commander was showing signs of emotion. Some habits died hard.

He picked another picture off one of the many piles and handed it towards his girlfriend, giving her that same look as before. Again, she figured she must have seriously missed something whilst being lost in her own thoughts.

"You've developed a sudden liking for floral arrangements and want my approval?" she questioned, a smile growing on her lips. The first true smile she had given in what seemed like too long. "You're replacing your leather fetish with flowers?" she added, still unsure as to what all of this was.

When he met her gaze with a glare, which seemed to be holding a hint of playfulness within it, she couldn't help but laugh, it felt good. It felt relieving, like a weight had ever so slightly shifted from her shoulders. For the first time in a long time, she felt happy... she felt normal; she felt that she really could get through all of this.

Turning back to the pictures in her hands, she sat down on the bed beside Squall. "Are you going to tell me what all of this is yet? That is, unless if you want me to continue the inappropriate guesses."

"...You have more suggestions?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Hundreds," Rinoa said enthusiastically. "Although my next guess would be a nice floral design printed on your gunblade or a-"

Rinoa's words were ended as she felt his hands pull her towards him and his lips pressed against hers. His kisses were light and gentle and she suddenly realized how much she had missed him and...how much she had neglected him during the last few days. It felt like she hadn't spoken to him in weeks and suddenly, the effects were finally letting themselves known. She pressed her lips against him once more, before he pulled away resting his forehead against hers.

"Stop talking," he said, barely above a whisper as his hand pushed her hair behind her ear.

"...Did I guess right?" she asked as he planted a kiss on her forehead before turning back towards the scattered papers across the bed.

"I said stop talking," he shook his head at her words, giving her a disapproving look.

In spite of this, he couldn't help but smile as she gave him her best innocent face and moved closer to him resting her head on his shoulder. She was being herself again and it was a great relief to see her this way. He'd watched her for a long time tonight, noticing how she was in her own little world. She'd hardly spoken a word to him since she had come from her father's house so he guessed that in time, she would talk more about what was going through her head. She seemed okay at the moment so that was all that mattered.

"It's for the wedding," he finally answered, placing an arm around her waist. "Selphie's been pestering me to help out with some of the arrangements for a while. For some reason, she put me in charge of centerpieces for the tables, because you're... busy."

Busy? That was an interesting way to describe what she was going through. Rinoa felt a mix of emotions run through her; the reality of what had happened hitting her once more. She felt a little angry by his phrasing of what she was going through, but at the same time, she felt happy. He was trying, they were all trying. She had to keep reminding herself of this fact, so she let his comment slide. As much as she wanted to get upset, to be angry or just do... something, she let it pass. Right now, what she needed most was a piece of how her life used to be. She needed him.

A smile formed on her lips as she looked down at the bed, seeing all of the research Squall had put into his task. Of all the emotions that she had gone through the last week, she did the only thing she could at the given moment.

She laughed.

Squall looked at her, almost shocked at her reaction. His choice of words was not the best phrasing in the world as he had inwardly cringed as soon as the words escaped his mouth. He expected her to be angry at him and when she had remained silent he mentally berated himself for how insensitive he had sounded. The woman beside him made a sound and he thought she was crying at first. What an idiot, he told himself over and over. Squall faced Rinoa, about to apologize when he realized the sound wasn't crying.

Was she... laughing?

"What's so funny?" he asked, bewildered by her reaction.

Rinoa looked at her boyfriend, her laughter becoming uncontrollable, loving every moment of it. It was as if the more she laughed, the more she felt alive.

"You... and flowers..." she tried to speak. It took a moment to compose herself before she could look at Squall more seriously. "I swear Selphie's sense of humour has got worse since pregnancy... Do you need any help?"

"Yes," Squall replied, a rare true smile on his lips. "Honestly, all flowers look the same to me and I don't know where to begin."

Rinoa turned to look at Squall in silence for a moment before wrapping her arms around him. He seemed slightly startled by her sudden actions, but his arms soon made their way around her as she rested her head against his shoulder. She loved moments like this with him, when it was just the two of them away from SeeD and everyone else. These were the times where he would show her his true side and not have to hide behind his usual professional manner.

"I missed you," she said after a moment of taking in the strangely foreign feeling of him holding her close, the sensation of him stroking her hair gently in the safe haven within his arms.

While the thing in the dark was lurking somewhere and she could sense it, but for now, it could wait. All that mattered right now was that she felt safe and happy with Squall by her side.