A/N: I felt like my last chapter was a bit short, so I think this one will make up for it!

Chapter 5

Hogan went to join his men for lunch; glad to finally be getting something to eat. He immediately noticed that Newkirk was sitting next to Carter, and inwardly smiled. He wasn't sure why, but he had a feeling if anyone could help jog Newkirk's memory, it would be him. He fixed himself a plate and sat down next to Kinch.

For a minute or two no one said anything; they were too busy wolfing down their food. It was Newkirk who finally broke the silence. "LeBeau, this is delicious!" He exclaimed, "You're a terrific cook, mate!"

"Funny," LeBeau replied sarcastically, "You never liked it before."

"Didn't I?" Newkirk seemed surprised. "Well, I must 'ave been crackers then, because this is fantastic!"

LeBeau looked at him suspiciously, waiting for the insult that was sure to follow. When none seemed to be forthcoming, he asked, "Are you serious?"

Carter gave Newkirk a nudge. "Some people don't know how to take a complement," he said with a smirk, glancing in LeBeau's direction.

"I do too know how to take a complement!" LeBeau cried out indignantly. "I'm just not used to getting them from any of you!"

"Now that's not fair, Louie," Carter replied defensively, "We complement you all the time!"

"Oh, really?" LeBeau countered, "When was the last time you said you liked my cooking?"

Carter appeared to be contemplating. "I think it was last week," he answered, his brow furrowing in concentration, "Or was it the week before? I'm sure I said something…maybe it was…well, I've never said I didn't like your food, did I?"

LeBeau's face was red with anger by now. "Carter, I'm going to…"

"Hold it, hold it!" Hogan yelled, interrupting them. When he had their attention he said, "LeBeau, you're an excellent cook, and if we haven't let you know that lately, then I apologize…for all of us!" He glanced at Carter, who now had a guilty expression on his face.

"Thank you, Colonel," LeBeau said as graciously as he could, throwing Carter a look of triumph.

Newkirk had been watching the entire exchange in complete confusion. He finally spoke up. "I don't understand," he said, glancing between Carter and LeBeau, "Why were you two arguin' just now? I thought you were mates."

"Oh, I think they just like to argue," Kinch told him, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth, "They do it often enough."

"We don't always argue like this, you know," Carter stated matter-of-factly.

"He's right," Kinch replied, breaking into a grin, "Usually it's much worse!"

Carter opened his mouth to protest, when suddenly the door to the barracks burst open, and Sergeant Schultz entered, simultaneously yelling, "Rous! Rous! Everybody outside for a surprise roll call! Rous!"

Hogan stood up and turned to face the large man. "Aw, c'mon Schultz; we're eating here!"

"Yeah, Schultzie," LeBeau piped up, "Why don't you let us finish, and I'll let you have some, too."

Schultz inhaled deeply and closed his eyes. "Oh, it smells wunderbar!" He exclaimed, but then opened his eyes and said, "No, I can't…I have my orders. Colonel Klink wants everybody outside for roll call right away!"

"Why does he want a roll call in the middle of the day, Schultz?" Hogan asked him, fishing for information.

"I don't know," Schultz answered nervously; "I only know that he wants you all outside right now. Please, Colonel Hogan!"

Hogan turned to his men. "Well, you heard him, fellas, everybody outside!"

There was a collective groan from the men seated at the table. They started to get up and make their way to the door. As Carter rose, he felt a hand latch onto his arm and grip it tightly. He turned to look at Newkirk, who was looking back at him, his eyes filled with fear.

"That's a German guard!" He whispered fiercely, glancing at Schultz and, more importantly, the rifle he was carrying.

Carter put his hand reassuringly on Newkirk's shoulder and smiled at him. "Oh, that's just Schultz," he replied, "You don't have to be scared of him, he's okay." Boy, he thought to himself, I've never seen Newkirk like this before! He really has lost his memory, hasn't he?

"So, where is everyone going, then?" Newkirk asked, still scared.

"We have to go outside and line up, and then Schultz will count us to make sure we're all here," Carter explained, "Then we have to wait for the Kommandant to come over and tell us why he's making us stand out there in the first place. Then he usually says something that we already know, and…"

"Carter," Hogan called to him, "Let's go. I'll show Newkirk where to stand."

"C'mon, Newkirk," Carter said, leading him toward the door, "It'll be okay, I promise!"

Hogan now noticed how frightened Newkirk looked. He smiled at him and said, "Don't worry, Newkirk, we do this all the time!"

They went outside and joined the line that had formed directly in front of the barracks. Hogan took his position, and motioned for Newkirk to stand next to him on his left. Schultz came down the line, counting them, once again elated that they were all there. He looked at them, smiling, and was about to say something, when the door to Klink's office opened and the Kommandant emerged.

"Repooort!" Klink yelled, like he always did.

"All present and accounted for, Kommandant!" Schultz declared.

Newkirk saw Klink approach, and his fear grew. He shot a look at Hogan, who was standing at attention, staring straight ahead. He decided to copy him, doing his best to stand straight and look forward.

Klink walked up to the line of prisoners and started pacing back and forth in front of them. "I suppose you're all wondering why I called this little 'Surprise' roll call, aren't you?"

"You were feeling lonely, sir?" Hogan asked innocently.

Klink shot Hogan a look of annoyance. Ignoring Hogan's comment, he continued, "I have just been informed that there was an escape from Stalag 4 this morning, and five men are now missing from there."

The line of men began cheering. Klink let them carry on for a moment, and then held up his hand. "I'm telling you this because I want to remind you that there's never been an escape from Stalag 13, and I don't want you getting any ideas…"

"But that's not what you told me, Hogan!" Newkirk blurted out, turning his head to look at him, "You said…"

Hogan leaned over and clamped his hand over Newkirk's mouth. He brought his face up to Newkirk's ear and, gesturing to Klink with his eyes, hissed, "He's not supposed to know about that!"

"Colonel Hogan!" Klink shouted, "What are you doing? Remove your hand from that man at once!"

Hogan let go of Newkirk and stepped back to his spot, glancing nervously at him.

Klink stepped in front of Newkirk and looked directly at him. "Now, Corporal Newkirk," he said, "Is there something you want to tell me?"

Newkirk was scared to death. At last he croaked out, "No."

"No?" Klink repeated, looking expectant.

Hogan leaned over again and whispered something in Newkirk's ear.

"No, sir!" Newkirk answered.

Klink looked at Hogan and motioned him away from the line. When they were far enough away to carry on a private conversation, Klink asked, "Colonel Hogan, what's wrong with your Englishman?"

Thinking quickly, Hogan replied, "He's been sleepwalking, sir. It started last week. I think it's making him a little delusional."

"Sleepwalking?" Klink echoed.

"Yeah," Hogan said, and then leaned in conspiratorially. "He's even started thinking he's someone else while he's doing it."

"Really?"

"Uh huh. Last night, he thought he was Churchill for a whole hour!"

"He did?"

"Yes, sir. And the night before that, he thought he was Hitler!"

"He thought he was Hitler?"

"Yep."

"So, what did you do, Hogan?"

"Well, we tried to get him back to bed, but he wouldn't stop making speeches!"

Klink looked at Hogan, and knew he'd been had. "Hogan!" he exclaimed angrily, "Just control your man from now on; I will not tolerate any more outbursts at roll call!" He stomped off, heading back to his office, yelling, "Dismissed!" almost as an afterthought.

As soon as Klink was gone, Hogan looked at his men. "In my office, now!" He ordered, giving them each a look that said he meant it. He walked purposely toward the barracks, not once checking to see if they were following.

Newkirk turned to Carter. "He's angry with me, isn't he?" He said quietly, looking both scared and sad at the same time.

"Aw, hey, it's not your fault, you know," Carter responded, trying to make him feel better. "I think he's just upset because we forgot to tell you to be quiet at roll call, that's all. Don't worry, It'll be okay, you'll see!"

Newkirk looked at him gratefully. "Thanks, Carter," he replied.

"Hey, what are friends for?" Carter said, smiling at him. "Oh, and by the way," he added, "You can call me Andrew if you want to."

Newkirk looked at him curiously. "Andrew?" He repeated.

"Yeah, that's my first name." Carter informed him. "You used to call me that all the time, remember?"

Newkirk searched his brain, but there was nothing. "Sorry, mate, I just can't seem to remember. But I'll be happy to call you Andrew, if that's what you prefer."

"Gee, thanks, Newkirk!" Carter replied happily, and then, suddenly realizing they were supposed to be meeting in Colonel Hogan's quarters, said, "We better get going. I don't want to make the Colonel any madder than he is already!"

Carter led Newkirk back through the barracks and into Hogan's quarters. Kinch and LeBeau were already there, standing near the desk. As soon as they entered, Hogan shut the door.

Before Hogan could say anything, Newkirk spoke up. "I'm sorry for gettin' you in trouble, Hogan," he apologized, a mixture of sadness and guilt radiating from his eyes.

Hogan noticed how crestfallen his Corporal was, and his anger immediately drained away. "It's all right," he replied gently, "I realize this isn't your fault. And don't worry; I'm not in any trouble…at least no more than usual! But, it's obvious that we need to show you how things work around here."

"I'd like that, mate," Newkirk responded sincerely. "I don't want to be causin' trouble for you...or for me self!"

"Well," Hogan said, "The first thing you should know is what to call me. I know I told you to call me Hogan, but since I'm your Commanding Officer, you need to address me as 'Colonel Hogan', okay?"

"Or you can call him 'Colonel'…or even just, 'Sir'." Carter added.

Hogan looked at him. "Thanks, Carter, but I think I can handle this," he told him impatiently.

"Sorry, sir," Carter replied, embarrassed.

Hogan turned his attention back to Newkirk, and was about to continue, when an idea popped into his head. "Say," he said, glancing briefly at the other three men in the room, "Why don't I have one of my men here show you around the camp, and he can fill you in on what you need to know at the same time."

"I'll do it, Colonel!" Carter volunteered enthusiastically.

Hogan smiled at him. "I had you in mind, Carter."

"C'mon, buddy," Carter said, grabbing Newkirk's arm and leading him out of the office, "We can start with the rec hall; you're gonna love that place, boy! There's a pool table, and a record player, and we've got lots of records to listen to. And sometimes we have dances in there, but only for special occasions, you know. And then I'll take you over to…"

As Carter's voice faded, LeBeau looked at Hogan. "You're sending him out there with Carter?" He asked him incredulously.

"Yeah, Colonel," Kinch chimed in, "You sure you're not mad at him for what happened at roll call?"

Hogan looked surprised. "Don't you get it?" He replied, "Carter's perfect! Newkirk's gonna learn more about this place in an hour with him than it would take one of us a week to explain!"

Kinch nodded. "You're right, Colonel." He agreed.

"Oui, Mon Colonel," LeBeau responded, also in agreement. "I hadn't thought of it like that before. But I still think Newkirk will need a couple of aspirins when he gets back!" LeBeau chuckled, and then went out to the main barracks to clean up the dishes.

As soon as they were alone, Kinch asked, "So, Colonel, have you decided what we're going to do about Newkirk?"

"Not yet, Kinch," Hogan told him. "Wilson said he might get his memory back in a few days, or it might not come back at all. Only time will tell."

"And if it doesn't come back?" Kinch asked.

Hogan sighed. "You saw what happened today. The way Newkirk was acting; he was terrified! Even if we teach him everything he's forgotten, I don't think he's got the temperament he needs for this job anymore." Hogan walked over to the chair and sat down heavily. "He's just so…different."

"Well, sure, Colonel," Kinch said, seeing what Hogan was getting at. "When he lost his memory, his old personality went with it. Everything's brand-new to him right now. Imagine how you'd react to a place like this if you lost your memory?"

"Probably the same way Newkirk's reacting right now." Hogan replied, grinning, and then his grin faded. "But that's the problem, Kinch. If he doesn't get his memory back, it's not safe to keep him here…not for him, and not for us." Hogan considered it for a moment, and then finally made his decision.

"Two days, Kinch," he told him. "I'll give him two days, and if his memory isn't back by then, I'm sending him home."

8