A/N : Thanx as always for the feedback, which I love! Here we go with more LoVe! :-)
(For disclaimer, etc - see chapter 1)
Chapter 6 - We'll Be All Right
It had taken some serious talking, a couple of sincere promises, and a stern warning before Keith had finally agreed that Veronica could go to school on Monday morning. It wasn't as if she would usually mind skipping a day of classes for any reason at all, but Veronica knew if she didn't face Neptune High today, she never would again. For a little while longer she could pretend everything was normal, a privilege she would lose just as soon as anyone found out about her pregnancy. That was going to be a made a lot easier when she started showing, and given her slim figure that could only be just around the corner!
Facing Duncan wouldn't be easy, and facing Logan would be even harder for her, but Veronica was determined to be brave. Nobody else knew yet, no teachers or students or anyone. She would be safe in class and away from the two men in her life. She could learn, which is what one went to school for anyway, and hopefully socialise a little with the other girls, not that many of them talked to her anymore. It wasn't their fault, Veronica didn't blame them for feeling awkward. As much as they all missed Lilly, Veronica had been her best friend, and as such was affected more by her death than any of the other girls. Veronica without Lilly was an unthinkable concept, and as with most things, that which was not understood was avoided altogether.
"I could've walked" Veronica told her father once again as he drove her to school, checking his watch for the fifth time in as many minutes, both of them knowing this trip would make him late for an appointment.
"And I said it's no problem to drive you" Keith repeated with a smile, though he was now kind of wishing he'd accepted that she could have used her legs instead of his wheels, "Now, you remember what I said" he reminded her as they neared the school at last, "No gym class, you give your teacher that note and if she asks any questions you get her to call me" he said firmly.
"Yes, Dad" she responded dutifully, producing the note he'd given her to prove she'd picked it up as instructed.
It was basically a vague instruction that Veronica was not to participate in any contact sports or over-energetic exercise due to doctors orders and an unnamed medical condition. It was at least partially true, and Miss Mars doctor certainly had advised against her doing anything that might result in taking a blow to the abdomen or similar. Of course her condition wasn't so much an illness but the less said about that the better.
"Okay, I'll be right out here when school ends to take you home, no arguments" Keith said swiftly when it seemed his daughter might fight him on the issue.
Knowing her words of disagreement would do no good, Veronica only nodded in response and waved as her Dad drove away from school, leaving her alone. It was perhaps the wrong word to use, since one could never really be alone amongst so many fellow students, but with only two of them knowing her secret and the distinct possibility that neither would be hugely eager to talk to her right now, Veronica felt entirely lonely. It was moments like these when she felt Lilly's absence so strongly.
Taking a deep breath and steeling herself against whatever was to be thrown her way today, Veronica headed for the school building, her head held high. She needed to practice being strong and confident in the face of adversity, Lord knows there would be plenty to come when her secret was revealed. One thing Neptune High was good for was spreading information around, whether you wanted it to happen or not.
"Oh, hey, Veronica" Duncan smiled awkwardly as they almost literally bumped into each other in the hall.
"Hey" she responded in kind as he realised eyes were on them and put his arm around her briefly whilst he kissed her cheek.
They were one of Neptune's golden couples, and the subject of much gossip, not in a bad way but just because every couple wanted to be like them. Before Lilly died, she and Logan were another talked about pair, along with a few other 09er relationships. People kept up with the ups and downs of each couple, like watching their own live soap opera each day in the halls of the High School. Most times, Veronica didn't pay too much mind to it; today she hated it.
"I think we really need to talk" she told her boyfriend, ever mindful of other listeners, "Later, alone" she added and Duncan looked away then back at her.
"Er, well, today might not be the best day" he said, shuffling his feet, "I have Student Council meeting at lunch, and after school I need to get a ton of homework done..." he said with a random hand gesture as the bell rang over head, "And if I don't move fast I'm going to be late for class" he said with an attempt at a smile, before planting another peck on her cheek and hurrying away without so much as a 'see you later'.
Veronica turned and watched her boyfriend disappear down the hall. She was equal parts stunned, mad at him, and upset as she stood alone in the middle of the hall, feeling like the fool she knew she was. Lies be damned, the two of them needed to talk. Whoever was the father of her child, and regardless of who knew what facts about its creation, Duncan was still her boyfriend, he should still care about her enough to want to talk to her about the situation she'd gotten herself into. If he loved her, he'd want to be with her no matter what, and yet here she was standing alone in the hall.
"Hey" said a voice behind her and Veronica realised that some things never changed, despite all that had in the past couple of days.
When she felt lost, in trouble, and terribly alone, she was always reminded that there was at least one person who would always be there for her.
"Logan" she said as she turned to face him, not really knowing what else to say right now as she looked from his face to the hundreds of others all around the halls, all hurrying to their first class of the day.
"I didn't sleep last night thinking about everything, Veronica" he told her honestly, and the blonde knew if anyone overheard even that particular sentence they could be the subject of gossip within a second.
Right now, more than any other time in her life, Veronica could use not being targeted by the gossip girls of Neptune High. Taking a look around, she grabbed Logan's arm and pulled him behind her over to the wall. Sure no-one was paying attention to them, she suddenly shoved him back through a door before he had a chance to argue, and followed him without a word.
"Huh" he said, taking a look around at the unfamiliar surroundings as Veronica checked the stalls were all empty, "So this is what the girls bathroom looks like" Logan said thoughtfully, before he was unceromoniously shoved aside.
Veronica pushed the wedge under the back of the door, stopping anyone else from entering and then turned to face the young man who could be most accurately described as the father of her unborn child. Of course, nobody but the two of them knew that, and for now at least, she planned to keep it that way.
"What do you want from me, Logan?" she asked him in earnest, her eyes practically begging him to make this easy on her but unfortuanelty they both knew that was impossible.
"I want to know how long you're going to keep lying to Duncan" he told her, "And maybe why you told the lie in the first place?"
"I already explained that" Veronica said sadly, turning away.
"Oh, that's right, to save your reputation" Logan said, snapping his fingers like he'd just had a eureka moment, "Well, safe to say, Ronnie, I think you just came up with the best ever example of shutting the gate after the horse bolted"
He knew he'd said the wrong and maybe even unforgivable thing way before she spun around, her hand connecting with his face with more force than he ever would've expected, had he expected such an attack at all.
"Don't you dare talk to me like that" she said hoarsely, angry tears welling in her eyes as she stared up at Logan, his hand going absently to his cheek that stung like hell, "I didn't do this alone, we both got into this mess and now I have to deal with the consequences" she said sadly, deciding she'd had enough of this and heading for the door.
Logan reached for her arm as she made to escape and pulled her back.
"Hey, I didn't ask you to handle this alone, you didn't give me a choice" he pointed out, stopping Veronica in her tracks.
His light grip on her upper arm would be easy to evade but the truth he spoke was not. She couldn't blame him for knocking her up and leaving her high and dry, she hadn't exactly been forthcoming with the truth or quick to ask for his help or even his opinion. Veronica had cut Logan out of this child's life before the baby were barely a person. They'd both done wrong, neither was blameless, and yet right now as she turned red-rimmed eyes on him, she could see only the damage she herself had done.
"I'm sorry" she cried, tears trickling down her cheeks, "Logan, I am sorry that I'm lying to Duncan and his family. I'm sorry I couldn't even tell my Dad the truth. I'm sorry I couldn't be faithful to Duncan, and that a part of me always wanted you more than him" she bawled, crying like a child as each confession spilled out, "And most of all I'm sorry that Lilly's not here, because she is the one person who I might've actually been able to talk to about all of this... who might've actually understood" she cried hard, her body convulsing with huge heaving sobs.
Despite the shock at her sudden outburst, Logan reacted on instinct alone and pulled Veronica into his arms in an attempt to comfort her. She fought a little at first, but eventually just let herself relax against him, let out too much emotion that she'd been holding in. She thought she was done with crying yesterday, but clearly that wasn't the case. Apparently her damn hormones were going to mess with her head more than she ever suspected they might.
"How does this keep happening?" Veronica said eventually when her tears finally subsided, "How do we always end up like this?" she asked, lifting her head up from Logan's chest and looking up at him.
"I don't know" he said putting a hand to her face and wiping the tear tracks from her cheeks, "Maybe its a coincidence" he considered, "Or... maybe its fate" he said, knowing it was probably wrong and yet not being able to help himself as he leaned down to kiss her.
"Logan..." Veronica didn't look mad at him, just tired and a little off-put as she backed away from him a little, though stayed in his arms still, "Please, don't. You know I'm with Duncan..."
"I know you guys are supposed to be dating" Logan sighed, "I know you fight so much lately that you spend more time with me than with him" he said, turning her chin in his hand til she was looking at him again, "And I know you just said a part of you always wanted me more" he reminded her, eyes boring into her own.
Veronica knew she couldn't lie about it, not after what she said. She wasn't sure she could find a way to hide this truth much longer anyway, and really her being pregnant with his child ought to make it easier for her to be with Logan. The town at large would expect the pair to be grown-up and deal with the consequences of their actions. Of course, the concept of the population of even Neptune High knowing her situation made Veronica feel terribly nauseous, but at the same time, standing here in Logan's embrace made her feel like everything would be okay somehow.
"I do want you, Logan" she admitted, voice cracking with emotion, "I... I do love you" she said seriously, unable to miss the smile that curved his lips then, "but I also love Duncan" she said, shaking her head in hopes in might ease the confusion inside her brain - of course, to didn't work.
"Veronica, if you loved Duncan so damn much, you wouldn't be pregnant with our baby" Logan pointed out to her, and that at least there was no argument for.
Girls who were in love, really in love, were completely and hopelessly devoted to their boyfriends. It shouldn't matter how they fought or yelled, because deep down a person in love ought to hold on to only that and believe that everything can be worked out in the end. Instead of this, Veronica had used a rather nasty argument with Duncan as an excuse to fall into bed with the guy who was both his and her best friend at different times. As wrong as she'd always known that night they spent together ought to be, something about it had felt so right, and still did to this day, in spite of the more than awkward consequences that had been literally spawned out of it.
"Veronica" Logan said softly, pushing her hair back off her face and staring down into her eyes still, "I love you"
Though she'd started to see it before, it was now, standing here in the girls bathroom of all unlikely places, in the arms of a young man who was not her boyfriend, that Veronica realised what a fool she'd been. Not for cheating with Logan, not even for getting pregnant, but for actually thinking for a second that life would be easier if she chose to pass the baby off as Duncan's child instead of admitting the truth and being with Logan.
She'd tried to tell herself it was more important to protect her reputation and that the Echolls family would never want anything to do with all this. Logan had been so right when he said just now that her name would be mud around Neptune for the pregnancy alone, the father of the child would make no difference. It was also abundantly clear now, as perhaps it always should have been, that Logan's feelings for her ran so very deeply, he'd do anything to help her. Veronica almost felt worse for not believing in his love for her than for anything else she'd done so far.
"I have to tell my Dad the truth" she blurted out, the product of one very bumpy train of thought through one too many things, "Duncan and the Kanes and the world can wait, but I do know I can't lie to him anymore, I never should've in the first place..." she said, getting herself all upset again.
"Hey, shh, its okay" Logan tried to calm her down, holding her close and rubbing her back soothingly, "We're gonna work this out, Veronica, I promise you that" he swore to her, and she believed him.
To Be Continued...