It wasn't until late that very afternoon that Light had remembered what had gone on that night, since by the time he had woken up, L had already returned to his own bed. Perhaps Light dismissed it as a dream, or just simply forgot, for that matter. Still, he sensed a strange attraction to L that had not been present the previous day.
But it was now, glancing over at L's almost unnaturally concentrated gaze that Light recalled the exact details of the night before. It was like a movie was suddenly playing in his head, no, more like flooding into it. This was a sensation not unlike touching a Death Note after forfeiting possession of it. Had Light have known about the Death Note at this time, he would have instantly seen the striking similarity. Still, it was indeed the remarkable paleness of L's face, and the beautifully contrasting pure black of his eyes that compelled Light so much.
"Light-kun, we should go out and enjoy the snow while it lasts. It is extremely rare for snow to fall at this point of the year."
Blushing madly, and wanting deeply to do so with L, Light extraordinarily could not bring himself to verbalize the latter. So instead, he rudely sneered, "Why? We're not little kids or something. Besides that, we have all of this work to fin-mmph!"
L had rushed, no, perhaps fluttered over to Light and, holding the young man's perfectly formed chin ever so delicately with his long fingers, planted a firm, yet graceful, kiss on Light's astonished lips. Light, having no time to react, had no choice but to give in to L's desperate gesture of affection. He shut his tawny eyes and placed his hands on L's shoulders in a kind, accepting manner. He was actually finding himself enjoying this.
No. He thought, no no no no no! He couldn't do this, he shouldn't do this, he wouldn't do this. He shoved L away angrily, simultaneously snapping around to the opposite direction, hiding his still-red face.
"L," Light started coldly, "Get these chains off now. I can't stand them any longer."
He bit his lip. Now he was just being stubborn, like usual.
Sure, he had plenty of friends, he was naturally outgoing. But whenever he truly tried to let someone into his heart, his stubborn unwillingness to lose took over. He was actually quite lonely for the kind of kid he seemed to be. So how could he possibly conceive that this would be any different than the other times?
He refused to admit that he was falling in love, even though he knew that was exactly what it was.
"Light-kun, I-"
Light cut him off. He turned to face him, holding his left arm up to L's eye level.
"I want this off. I'm serious."
L was perfectly silent as he fished in his pocket for the key, and when he unlocked the shackles as well. When he was finished hegave Light the most pitiful look he had possibly ever seen.
It stung Light awfully. He couldn't stand it. Had he really hurt this man that badly? It apalled him that he could do such a thing to a human being. Isn't this exactly why he wanted to prove himself innocent of being Kira? And seeing L like this was shredding his heart like some kind of internal blizzard. He couldn't grasp as to why at all. His whole mind and emotions were being ripped apart at the seams from this drama. He had never let anything like this happen, ever. This change unsettled Light. He was losing control. He needed control. And yet he still wouldn't admit the reasons for the sudden change of character.
What the hell was wrong with him?
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