Chapter 20

Bella's POV

I knew that it would be difficult to move on. But I never imagined it this hard. It reminded me of that Coldplay song, "The Scientist."

"Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard."

It seemed that during these recent days I had been useless. I thought that since I broke up with him it would be simple to move on because I had broken his heart… but mine appeared to be shattered into little pieces too.

At night I laid in bed, my only focus on getting his laugh, smile, and dancing blue eyes out of my head. Many sleepless nights have occurred- whether it is the loss of his arms or just him that caused this, I didn't know. But I was willing to bet that it was the combination of both.

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When we got back to school, everybody gave me strange, curious looks. They didn't know what happened- they could only guess. Luckily, I had made trustworthy and caring friends who made sure all false rumors where shut down, and all secrets kept inside.

But it was a well known fact that Bella Swan and Tristan Ashburn were history.

I continued on with my classes, doing well as I always did, but my writing lacked a 'voice', my calculus tests didn't have quite as many eraser marks, and the injury rate in my PE class drastically reduced.

Alice, Rosalie, Jasper, Emmet, and Edward were the ones who kept me going. I didn't have many friends aside from them, but they were more than enough. Although I was very quiet and invert these days, we went out to the movies, the mall, dinner, or anything that was entertaining often. Oh, and Edward's basketball games.

In fact, it was at Edward's basketball game where I started to return to my old self. After a while, I began to engage in conversations, pay attention to the movies, and laugh when Emmet made a silly joke. In other words, it began to feel as if somebody wasn't always missing.

When March rolled around, I was back into my regular self… as close as I could get with some minor adjustments. For example, when Mike asked me out on a date, I felt the need to reject him. I was finished putting me whole heart into things because I found out that that was an easy was to get it broken.

This was the new Bella- one who built walls instead of bridges as the old saying goes. But it was what I needed to make sure I didn't fall back again.

It was March 3rd, a Friday when Alice began pushing the limit.

"Bella! Get up, get up!" she screamed while bouncing on her knees on my bed. I tried to swat her away, but my hit was too feeble and I missed.

"Come on, Bells!" She usually wasn't this excited in the morning so I knew that something was up. I just had to figure out what this something was.

"I'm up, I'm up," I complied while sitting up, resting my back on the wall behind me. Alice just sat there on my bed in front of my smiling… this was creepy.

"What Alice?" I asked her impatient while rubbing my eyes, everything was still cloudy from sleep.

"Today is Friday!" she announced boisterously. I blinked once, and stared at her blankly.

"That's it," I stated bluntly.

"Yup it's the first Friday of March," she answered even more jubilantly. I gave her a skeptical look.

"What exactly is so special about the first Friday of March?" I squinted my eyes at her.

"Well, since you asked Bella…" I gave Alice a look that said 'get to the point'. "The first Friday of March is the unofficial, yet very official, first day of prom season!"

My mouth dropped open… she was not…

"Yes Bella, you're going! And with a date!" she added the last part quickly, as if I wouldn't notice.

"No, no, no, no way, Alice! I am not ready for this yet!" I replied violently shaking my head and getting up to go to the bathroom. I wasn't in a hurry, but I just needed to get away from her and soon.

"Yes, you are Bella!" she begged me. "You just can't see it!" she followed me keeping up easily even though her legs were a foot shorter than mine. I began brushing my teeth so I wouldn't have to answer.

"You know you need this Bella. It will be good for you! And with everybody there, it's going to be so much fun!" I looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"No," I stated hardly through the foamy toothpaste in my mouth.

"Bella, you know that without you, we all wouldn't have as good as a time. You need to be there with us." Alice pleaded, her words were sincere. Rosalie stepped into the bathroom.

"You can't miss out on this high school experience, too," she added, picking up a hair brush and running it through her perfect blonde hair. I hated when Rosalie made sense.

I spit out the toothpaste in my mouth and rinsed. After placing my toothbrush in the glass cup on the counter I turned around to look directly at Alice and Rosalie.

"A date?" I asked expectantly. Smiles flashed across their faces.

"Nothing too serious," Alice assured.

"Just a friend, if you want," Rosalie shrugged.

I pursed my lips in thought… maybe I should go. It could be fun with Alice, Rose and everybody; giving my best friends once last look I nodded. They squealed simultaneously.

"Yay! I'll text everybody the good news," Alice cheered immediately breaking out her blackberry from her pocket and moving her thumbs at a rapid pace.

I turned back into the reflection of the mirror and began getting ready for the long school day.

News travels fast at Bridgeton, because by lunch three people had already asked me to prom, Mike Newton being one of them. I noticed that many of these boys asked me to Homecoming also.

"What's for lunch today, Emmet?" I asked as I sat down at our usual table in the cafeteria. Emmet, of course, had already filled a whole tray of food and was sitting down, eating it.

"It's Friday, so there's strawberry ice cream today!" he cheered excitedly and I laughed, taking an apple off of his tray.

"Is that all your going to eat?" Emmet questioned with his mouth full, barely able to pronounce the words.

"Why does everybody always say that?" I hissed before taking a very large bite for show.

"Because it's weird," Emmet answered bluntly, taking a sip of his pink Vitamin water. I growled and gave him a dirty look, he laughed at my attempt.

"So Bella, find a date this morning?" Alice asked me brightly while setting her over large purse down on the table and sitting down, Jasper beside her with their tray of food.

"Eh," I answered… not really an answer. Alice gave me a look,

"So somebody asked you?" she questioned hardly… like an investigative reporter.

"Yes," I replied sheepishly, now focusing all of my attention on this wonderfully shiny red apple.

"Who?" Alice demanded.

"Uh… Ryan Conings, Weston something, and Mike Newton," I answered, taking another small bite and stealing a water from Emmett's tray (while receiving angry looks from Emmet).

"Bella, its Weston Saile and he happens to be gorgeous," Alice scoffed, I looked up at her and she was giving me that look when she thinks I'm going crazy. I met this look and retorted back, more fiercely than I thought it would come out.

"Yeah, well a lot of guys are 'gorgeous' and just because they are, doesn't mean everything is going to work out."

Grabbing my bag, water bottle and apple I got up and left the cafeteria, brushing past Edward on my way out.

"Bella!" I heard him call out to me, the tears were just leaking out from my eyes when I felt somebody grab my arm. Turning me around, he demanded,

"What's wrong?" his green eyes were soft with worry.

"Nothing," I instantly lied, a tear rolled down my cheek, betraying me.

"Bella…" Edward insisted. Being, next to a bench, I plopped down on it, Edward following suit.

"I just hate this whole prom thing," I admitted in a rush, looking away from Edward's face, ashamed.

"Why?" Edward's voice was comforting and melodic.

"Everything!" I answered frustrated.

"I know you Bella; you don't hate everything about Prom. What's it exactly that has you in tears?" I looked at Edward and his lips were in a small, consoling smile. His bronze hair was lighter these days- the sun bleaching the copper locks.

"You're right," I sighed, "I'm just not to… fond… about finding a date," I stressed the word fond so he knew that I meant revulsion, loathing, and disgust.

"Oh," Edward said, pausing for a moment to think.

"That's understandable; you recently ended a very serious relationship. I wouldn't be too 'fond' about your situation either," he agreed, smirking when he said fond. I smiled lightly back at me, he always knew the right thing to say.

"Though, I do have to agree with Alice and Rosalie on the subject of your attendance to the Prom. You can't miss the Prom." Edward stated; I nodded because I knew that he was right… once again. There was a thoughtful silence. I broke it, wanting to switch to lighter conversation topics.

"So who are going with?" I asked Edward as gaily as I could. He shrugged.

"Nobody, I guess. I mean there's nobody that I want to ask that would say yes," Edward answered nonchalantly, not making eye contact with me for the first time in our conversation.

"What's wrong with her?!" I exclaimed, outraged that Edward, of all people, was being rejected. Edward looked at me seriously,

"Nothing, she's perfect."

"She is obviously messed up, though, if she doesn't like you," I tried to make him feel better.

"That's what everybody is telling me, but I think she's got it right. I'm not worth it," I gaped at Edward, my mouth dropped open with a quiet 'pop'.

"You're worth it, Edward. You're great. You're such a good friend to me, to everybody, really." I thought about how many friends Edward had… he had a lot. I no longer thought of it as a possibility that Edward like me more than a friend. It had been so long and there were many other- more worthy, girls than me. In order to be a friend that he deserved, I thought it right to encourage him with other girls.

"Plus, you're an awesome basketball player- which is a major turn on,
I reminded him and he laughed in response- just what I wanted to hear. I smiled lightly at him,

"You should go ask her, she'll say yes, I just know it," I encouraged Edward; he tilted his head to the side, thinking deeply.

"Bella, you're right- I'm going to ask her…" Edward began.

"Do you want to go-," Edward stopped short when I broke away from his gaze to look at the person that was now standing next to me. I recognized this medium height, blonde senior, he had dark, cobalt blue eyes that dramatically contrasted with his perfect tan.

"Hey Alex," I greeted him; I still remembered when he asked me to homecoming. He had written "I love Bella' on his chest. My face turned red from laughing so hard.

"Hi Bella," he took a deep breath, "I know that it's a long shot, but I thought that maybe you would want to go to Prom with me?"

I looked at Edward from the side of my eye next to me; he was frozen, just staring at me.

"A long shot, really?" I questioned Alex. Alex snorted loudly and smiled,

"Uh, yeeeah. You've already turned down three guys this morning. What's the chance you say yes to me? Especially since I've already asked you to Homecoming and to the movies- both times being rejected." I was surprised he was laughing, smiling widely at the end as if I told a funny joke.

"Well since, you can never predict people," I stressed the last part hoping Edward would catch on, "Sure, I'd be glad to go to Prom with you."

Alex's honey eyes went wide with surprise,

"Holy shit! Thanks Bella! I'll call you later!" I laughed, smiling.

"Oh and can you do me a favor?" Alex asked me, getting something out of his pocket… a black marker.

"Sure," I breathed, shrugging. Alex grinned even wider.

"Can you write 'I'm going to Prom with Bella' on my chest?" He began take off his shirt only to reveal a very nice six-pack. Carefully and in all capital letters I wrote the silly message and gave him back is pen.

"Thanks Bella," was his parting words as he ran off, hollering and needless to say, attracting a whole bunch of attention. I turned back to Edward,

"Back to the previous conversation," I breathed and focused all my attention on his Greek god- like face. His eyes were not the same, and the smile on his lips was faint- it was forced.

"I was just going to ask you if you were planning on going with the rest of us," he stumbled over his words and they were rushed, not having the usual poetic feeling they possessed.

"Of course," I laughed, trying to lighten the now darkened Edward, "why else would I be even going to this stupid dance?"

Edward laughed with me, but it was different and he stood up, suddenly in a hurry.

"Sure, Bella; look, I got to take off. Emmet needs my homework. He forgot to do it and needs to copy off of mine. I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, sure," I replied and watched his tall, lean figure walk to the cafeteria, he ran his hand through his hair frustrated.

Edward's POV

I took my usual seat at the familiar cafeteria table. Bella remained outside so the seat next to me was empty.

"So…" Alice prompted, her head rested on her hands, leaning forward to hear what just happened.

"Didn't you see?" I asked, angry and irritated.

"Umm, we couldn't exactly see you guys from here," Alice answered, defensively.

"No. What I meant was, didn't you see Alex Craft?" I corrected and everybody at the table shook their heads in confusion.

"Well as of three minutes ago, Bella is going to Prom with him," I hissed, roughly taking a cinnamon sugar cookie off of Jasper and Alice's tray.

"No!" Emmet exclaimed; earning many heads turned into our direction. Rosalie nudged him in the ribs with her elbow.

"Yup," I answered curtly.

"How did you let this happen?" Alice demanded with fierce eyes. I swallowed the last of the cookie and rubbed the sugar on my hands off onto my light-wash Abercrombie and Fitch jeans my mother bought for me.

"Well I was telling her about how I wanted to ask somebody to the Prom but was reluctant because I was afraid that that somebody may reject me," I replied, frustrated in the extreme.

"Can't she freaking take a hint?" Alice said through gritted teeth. Jasper placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"No, I thought that she did get the alterative meaning, because then she started telling me about how I was such a good friend, how I being a basketball player was a turn on, and that the somebody that I was nervous to ask to Prom was crazy if they said no to me." Emmet clapped a strong hand on my shoulder.

"Why don't you just tell her how you feel, no alterative meaning," Emmet suggested full-heartedly. I shook my head, looking down at the table.

"No, it would just scare her. She isn't ready for anybody new. She told me this. She still loves Tristan," I answered, trying to understand what I could do, because I would do anything.

"Edward, she's always going to love Tristan," Rosalie consoled me. "But the fact that she's still holding on is the reason why everything feels like it's at a standstill."

I looked up at the perfect face that I had learned to trust and love like a sister. I looked around the table and realized how many good friends I had gained his year. I looked around the table and saw the people I had come to love.

And the one that I was in love with wasn't here. She wouldn't even let me love her.

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I couldn't believe that I had to sit through is torture…it seemed that Alex and Bella were glued to the hip. I had to restrain myself from slugging Alex in the face during the dance when he began "dancing up on Bella" for the lack of a better word or words. I sat down at a table with my date, Jessica Stanley.

I couldn't believe I asked her, but I had nobody else to ask. She was talking animatedly about something I didn't care about, so I didn't listen except for the occasional nod of the head or the "continue" which kept her plenty busy.

I watched enviously from my seat as Bella and Alex danced, smiling and laughing with each other. I had to look away from he put his hands on her waist to pull her closer. Once the song ended, I got up from my seat, excusing myself from Jessica. Twisting my way through the mass of bodies, I finally reached the people I had been looking for.

"May I cut in?" I asked politely. Smiling brightly at Bella and then at Alex,

"I'm getting thirsty. Why don't I get us some drinks," Alex suggested happily and walked away after Bella nodded. Another song started to play, we started to dance- Bella's back against me.

Could she feel the electricity between like me?

She turned around to face me, and smiled while she moved the hips to the beat. I just watched her, wishing I had her; wishing that she saw me.

The song ended and instantly, Alex was there, beside her.

"Hey Bells, some of us are going to a party nearby. I wasn't going to go unless you wanted to…what do you say?" Alex asked her, handing her a clear plastic cup with red liquid in it.

"Sure, I guess," Bella shrugged and looked at me, "Want to come, Edward?" she asked me. I shook my head.

"No, it's fine. You go and have fun," I fake smiled.

"See you later, then!" Bella gave me a small, friendly, hug and Alex held her hand as they exited the dance floor and hotel all together. I stood there in the middle of the dance floor and looked at the doors, even after they were long gone.

"Dance, Edward!" Emmet nudged me in the side with his elbow as he and Rosalie grinded seductively. He was smiling from ear to ear as they dancing off in the general direction of the DJ at the front.

I slowly walked off of the dance floor and sat at a now empty table. At the edge of the dance floor I could see Jessica and Mike dancing. Perfect.

Alice suddenly was at my side, nearly bouncing with joy in the seat next to me.

"Edward! Having fun?" she asked me with a sly smile. I gave her a hard look and looked away, that was all the answer she needed to know what I was thinking.

"Where did Bella go," she asked me, though it wasn't too much of a question- Alice probably guessed that this would happen. Her voice was in monotone. I shrugged, looking at the door again, hoping that she would magically appear there.

"I don't know. She went to a party with Alex somewhere."

As if on cue, the air was suddenly tense, Alice grabbed my arm and forced me to look at her. For as tiny as she was… the girl was strong.

"A party?" she demanded, rigid. I nodded confusedly.

"Jesus, Bella," Alice growled and was out of her chair. I got up and watched while Alice walked out of the door with her cell phone already out and in her ear.

"Where's she going?" Jasper questioned me, concerned.

"I don't know all I told her was that Bella left to go to a party with Alex Craft and she flipped out on me," I answered, waiting for something to happen. Jasper nodded twice, and then followed her out of the door. I went also, not knowing what else to do.

"Bella! Answer me!" was what I heard as I walked through the door. I saw a very red faced, angry Alice yelling into her pink cell phone. She snarled when there evidently was no answer and closed the phone viciously. Alice turned on us and huffed loudly. Her hair was slightly disarrayed with a couple of wisps of hair stuck on her rosy cheek.

"Jasper, get Emmet and Rosalie; Edward call the limo. We're leaving."