Chapter thirteen: Release
As I stepped into the room I turned to close the door. Before I turned back to him I took a deep breath. Good thing I had because when I took a look at him I couldn't breathe. I could never really get used to how gorgeous he was. There he stood in the moonlight with dark blue and black flannel pajama pants, bare chest, with the light highlighting his strong features. Looking at him right there and then he was more of the Greek god than my Edward.
I walked to him slowly keeping my eyes on his, and his on mine. Once I reached him I lifted a hand on his chest where his beating heart would be. "You may not feel it anymore, but it still works and is full of love," I whispered, "I give you my life and love. Can you accept it?"
Edward placed one hand over mine and another on my cheek, "My Bella, I accept any treasures you choose to share with me." He then leant down and kissed his lips softly against mine. This kiss was not like the others, not at all. This kiss held so much admiration and love, though it wasn't fierce or long, it held so much meaning.
When we pulled away from each other we were both smiling and I knew he felt the same thing I had. We went to lie on the bed; I lay against his side and rested my head on his shoulder. "Are you excited for tomorrow my love?" Edward asked and I didn't respond right of way. He turned my face to his, "Bella, please tell me what you are thinking."
I didn't know where to start but I guessed it would be best to try and see where everything landed. "Well I know that I have been saying that I don't want my parents to be there," or Jacob I thought, "but I really do care and I feel awful that I have been saying that I don't and that it wouldn't mean anything if they were not there tomorrow. When I do care and it will hurt so much if they did not come to see me happy, when that is what I wanted; for them to come and see me happy before everything we do...before I change and before we fake my death. I want them to have some sort of comfort but this, how is this going to comfort them?" I began to cry and my eyes burned of hot tears.
I felt his cold fingers rub against my cheeks to wipe away my tears, "Bella, they will come if they truly accept us. Would you prefer that they came, not really wanting to be there, just being there out of courtesy?" he had a point. I wanted them to come because they were accepting the fact that I was marrying him. I didn't want them there feeling uncomfortable. I started to cry again but Edward lifted my face, "No…no more crying," he wiped the tears from my cheeks. "This is supposed to be a happy time and you will be happy because you are choosing this. This is what you want. You need not please to anyone except yourself. You will be happy; I will make sure of it." He then crashed his lips to mine and kissed me desperately. I could not believe what was happening. His difficult wall had crashed down and he did not hold back anything in this kiss and I was lost, twining my fingers in his hair and wrapping myself around him.
In this moment I was getting all that I wanted, but the more he opened the more I wanted to stop. We rolled on the bed and Edward was laying gently above me his hands began to slide down my sides. When I realized where this could be headed, I stopped him and pulled away. He looked down at me flushed and confused and I smiled sweetly. "I love you and I know you are doing this because you think this is what I want," he was about to protest when I placed a finger on his lips, "but I am willing to give you what you want and wait, just one more night…because now what you want is what I want." He smiled at me, his perfect crooked smile and adjusted us so that we were lying in the same position we started in.
We laid there silent for a while just appreciating the presence of each other. Then right as I got comfortable a big weight of guilt rested on my chest. Edward was able to feel the change, how I don't know but I couldn't hide from it.
"Bella…what is the matter?" he asked in a hushed tone. I put this subject off long enough. Our wedding was the next day; I had to talk this through with him.
"Edward I know that I have only mentioned the fact that I would like my parents to be there but there is one more person that I desperately want to be there," I paused not being able to for a complete sentence in my mind. I really could not figure out how I wanted to tell him that I wanted Jacob there, but he spoke first.
"I know who this person is Bella and I remember you asked not to send him and invitation to the wedding, but…" I was confused on where he was going with this testimony. "I sent him and invitation." I was shocked.
"You sent Jacob an invitation?" I could not believe what he was telling me. After everything and me specifically asking that Jacob not get an invitation he went and sent him one. "Why did you send him an invitation?"
"Well I figured that if I was in his position, though I would hate to ever see you marry that dog, I would have liked to make the choice for myself if I would attend. I would not like the idea of someone making the decision for me. Therefore I sent him the invitation so that he could have the choice and do what was in his heart. It was the least I could do for him, especially after all that he has done for me," he said looking into my eyes and brushing his fingers down the side of my face.
I was in complete and total shock. Edward had actually gone against his word and sent the invitation that I asked him not to send, but I was not mad. Not at all. I was very happy. I looked up at him and gave him the biggest kiss on the cheek that I possibly could. "Thank you Edward," and I snuggled right back into place ready to get a good nights sleep.
"You are not angry with me?" he asked, it was so cute when he worried. I looked up to him smiled and shook my head, "No I am not angry with you. I could not be; you know me so well that you went against your word, which is something you and I take very seriously, so that you can do something for me that I subconsciously wanted." I kissed his lips lightly and laid back to drift into sleep as the love of my life hummed my lullaby.