Bwaaaaaaah !

I own neither Rayman nor the Raving Rabbids. I only own the parts of this story that I`ve made up from the games.

"Bwaaaaaaah!" said the Rabbids, holding their plungers high over their heads. There were thousands of them. They had enslaved Rayman`s world, not by their strategy plans but by their great number. And they were about to do the same to the human world. They began appearing almost everywhere, in restaurants, in parks, in houses, and they began invading the television world.

Rayman hurried behind a wall, and the Rabbids passed without noticing him. Rayman got back on the street, only to be hunted down by even MORE Rabbids, holding brooms! Rayman ran inside a building.

The place was desert. The inhabitants had probably been scared out by the Rabbids. He walked to one of the apartments with its door wide open. He decided to stay there a little, at least until he found a way to counterattack. He closed the door behind him, and then sat on the couch.

"Bwaaaaaaaaaah!" a Rabbid appeared from behind the couch, ready to attack him with a carrot. Rayman rapidly took the carrot from the Rabbid`s hand and threw it down the open window. The stupid Rabbid said something impossible to understand to Rayman, then hurried to the window and jumped down to get its carrot back.

He then remembered everything that had happened the last year. The Rabbids had invaded Rayman`s world. Though the Rabbids looked a lot more demonic back then.

They popped out of the ground, just as if they had been there forever. They were greater in number, but clearly not in brains, something that is still true today. Rayman fought in the Rabbid arena and completed the challenges. He quite liked how the Rabbids were becoming his fans, decorating his cell during the competition. But of course, once he got the last plunger leading him to safety, he noticed he had forgotten the babies…

Rayman came back into his cell, putting off the plungers from the wall and prepared for his last day. He had collected enough information during that period of time to know what would help him save the Globox babies. For his last day, the greatest challenges and deadliest traps were placed inside all mini-games. Rayman entered the four doors, completed the challenges, and prepared for the acclamation of the crowd of stupid bunnies. However, he had brought something from one of the mini-games: the hammer-cow. He threw the hammer-cow to the Globox babies` cage and broke the chain linking them to the arena. The Rabbids just said one thing, and you guessed it: "Bwaaaaaaaaaah!" They attacked Rayman in masses. The hero had also brought a pillow from his cell. He threw the pillow under the cage so the babies didn`t get harmed, but he had other problems as well; the army of Rabbids attacking him! He threw the plungers like arrow and smashed a few Rabbids. But another problem came when he had to get out of the arena. He had to do something to distract the Rabbids. He put on his disco clothes and… danced. The Rabbids just danced with him, while Rayman was leaving all while dancing. Once the Rabbids out of view, Rayman made sure they were all locked inside the arena and blew it up. But the Rabbids fell all around, and conquered Rayman`s world to get revenge. So it was Rayman`s fault!

All inhabitants, angry after Rayman, chased him around the world, until Rayman found a high-tech place where planes leading to the human world were located. He had no choice but to leave. The last thing he saw was the Rabbids, hunting down the plane with plungers and other nonsense weapons. He never knew what happened to his enemies, who saw him leaving. He`s quite sure however that they fought against the Rabbids, who later found another plane leading to the human world.

That battle wasn`t finished yet. He had lost a battle, but the war wasn`t finished. When he saw Rabbids appearing around, he immediately spied on them to see what they were up to. They were planning on taking the human world by copying what they do habitually. Of course, they did this with their habitual manner of doing: by being totally ridiculous. Everything went quite easy at first. The Rabbids didn`t pose much threat. That is, until Rayman worsened the things by telling everything to authorities…

Rayman looked around the apartment. The people who lived there before had left rapidly. Just as if the Rabbids had invaded their apartment all of a sudden. There were toys around, there was plenty of food in the kitchen, and there was a radio still on. This may also explain why the door was left open and unlocked. Looks like the Rabbids didn`t touch anything. After all, their intentions were clearly evil in Rayman`s world, but here? It looked more like assimilation. But the events of the pas few months had proven him something else, as the Rabbids became dangerous over time. He reminded again what made the Rabbids so dangerous.

Rayman told to the entire population of Earth what would happen with these Rabbids around: nearly nothing. From what Rayman had seen, they only wanted to learn about the human world. They were learning works, practicing hobbies and acting like disrespectful humans. Of course, they were just copying; their undeveloped brain couldn`t let them learn about what they were doing. And then, they fell on the humans` greatest problems. Once they saw what they could do with money, they began robbing banks. They then learned about alcohol. Knowing their already present dumbness, Rayman knew that it wasn`t something okay to mix that with beer or wine. And he was right! Soon, the simplest city became almost as dangerous as a Grand Theft Auto city. The Rabbids then learned about drugs, which only gave them a vegetative state and the impossibility to turn into their hyped up, red-eyed version. They finally learned about "adult stuff", and Rayman just wishes he`d forget what things he saw then. For younger audiences reading this, I will just pass over that part of the story. The world becoming an immense mess with these Rabbids around, a crowd of citizens took torches and guns and fought against the army, killing as many as possible. This happened everywhere on Earth. The Rabbids ran away in their Bunny Spaceships they had built with material from NASA (and with help from people there too, sorry), and planned a counter-attack.

They took control of transmission lines. They soon "invaded" television, appearing in cartoons (their reputation made them so popular, some shows even had them as new regular characters), shows, varieties and reality shows. Raman remembers one of them: "The Dumbest Rabbid Ever". There the Rabbids were given a simple task and the one who succeeded best was eliminated from the show.

Rayman once trapped Rabbids inside a TV in a cottage, though. This only blocked four or five bunnies, which broke free.

Now, Rayman could do nothing. They were millions, all around the planet. Transmissions were all completely blocked. Rabbids were wrecking havoc everywhere. And in the end, Rayman had lost…

Rayman decided to stay in the apartment… for now. As long as he had somewhere to live, clothes and food, he had no problem. He just had to lock himself up and the idiot bunnies just wouldn`t be able to break in. He also closed all windows after watching around the apartment, making sure any Rabbid wasn`t hidden somewhere. He couldn`t watch TV, he couldn`t listen radio. He was just happy to be still alive. He looked in the kid`s room and found a Nintendo DS. He then saw one of these horrors humans had made. A videogame about Rabbids! He popped the game in, and turned the game on. And inside, he found all answers to his problems. These answers, with what he learned during his great adventure, would make up the plan that would help him save the Earth… and his own world at the same time.

Rayman made circulate papers around to tell the population about a meeting. This message would pass off the Rabbids, since they can`t read. Rayman then told the entire population of the town about his plan.

"Many people will need absolutely to give things to the Rabbids. I`ll call the police officers, they probably got a lot of what we need. We`ll hide sugar products and keep it out of Rabbids at ALL costs. We need absolutely to weaken them before we fight back. We need drugs."

Journalists began talking to each other.

"You heard me. Drugs make Rabbids weak. Their testosterone will no more raise and drive them mad. They`ll even become vegetative. Only a few grams per Rabbid will be enough. We will fight back and free not only television and radio, but also the entire Earth from the grip of these invasive bunnies!

Everyone acclaimed Rayman.

"Are you sure of what you are saying, Mister Rayman?" said a journalist.

"I`m sure of it. Human things drove the Rabbids crazy. In my world, there is no TV, no radio, no drugs, no money – unless Lums can be considered money – and alcohol doesn`t exist. I`ve studied Rabbids in my original world. I`ve studied them here. They are merely dangerous copycats. So, we can probably fight back by these same means. Get ready, everyone! It`s time for Earth Freedom!"

That`s it. The plan was begun. The citizens had hidden a humongous number of drugs in bars and drinks-selling places, and they were getting ready for Rabbids to sip up what they had planned for them. People had as well taken everything from pharmacies; all medicine (which did the same effect than bad drugs) was thus needed. They just had to plan either to drug the Rabbids or to give them an ill and cure them with medicine, which would in each case prevent their madness. Looked simple… but actually, the wide range of weapons the Rabbids could use was making it more difficult. They had plungers, brooms, boxing gloves, spray paint, and even themselves as projectiles (which hurts the enemy and the Rabbid – one more stupid thing!).

Rayman had looked around Internet; Rabbids were well-known everywhere on Earth. Nearly everywhere, spaceships had been made. There was one in each town! Maybe in case of problems, the Rabbids planned to leave. They were so stupid, they couldn`t have planned something that big… That was not the point. This was going to lead them to their loss against humanity. Because not only the drugs made Rabbids vegetative, but this effect lasted more than a day. So after the medicine or drug given to them, the Rabbids needed to be brought to a spaceship and thrown in. Once the spaceship completely full, it would be blasted off into space.

The battle raged everywhere in the world, during five long days. About 90% of the Rabbids had been cast away into space. However, the humans thought about a new plan for the Rabbids left. Since all spaceships had been used, the remaining Rabbids would be kept as pets, and they would be taught how to be good little animals (after all, they can be cute when they want to, don`t they?). Rayman hoped that with time, all this would be forgotten. Before going back to his world and save it in the same manner, Rayman decided to spend a few days in the human world. Maybe go eat ina restaurant, making friends… but he couldn`t stay in his apartment, the family owning it came back. He asked to stay a few days and the family agreed.

He tuned in the TV and listened with a distracted ear.

"Blah bolablada babolala, boblah daah… Bwaaaaaaaaaah!" the Rabbid News Reporter said.

With all that, Rayman had completely forgotten to free television and radio from these pesky invaders…