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XI.
alive with love, alive with love tonight
A week passed – during which Ashley and Spencer had many more small, "nice" moments – and they finally arrived at their goal. Madison's eyes shone brightly as they scanned the crowded, dirty space. She clutched their list of needed supplies tightly in her hand as everyone around jostled her. She didn't seem to mind.
"It's beautiful!" The Latina exclaimed and rushed off into the multitude to find the things they needed. Ashley chuckled as she watched her leave, reaching for Spencer's hand and threading their fingers together.
"C'mon, let's shop around." Spencer laughed along and followed the gentle tug that the other girl gave to their joined hands.
People teemed from every alley, every opening, swarming the limited space. The blonde felt a burst of fear at the sheer number of people, all in one space and closing in on her, but it faded when Ashley squeezed her hand and gave her a reassuring smile, a lock of curly hair in her eyes. She stepped closer to the strong girl and allowed her to lead her through the throng with the ease of experience.
They reached a vendor selling colorful clothes, some noticeably damaged. He beamed crookedly at the pretty girls holding hands and proceeded to try and sell everything he had, which turned out to be quite a few things. Spencer declined politely, well aware they had no money, but Ashley listened intently. She was examining a brightly-colored shirt closely when Spencer tugged her away, throwing the article of clothing back with an apologetic smile.
They find Madison again at a produce seller. She gazes hungrily at a fresh, deep red apple, not even noticing when the two girls come upon her. Ashley laughs at her expression, nudging her to get her attention. The Latina looks up, dazed for a moment before recognition comes into her eyes.
"Hey guys. I was just lookin' at the food."
Ashley grins mischievously, "The apples look good?"
"Hm? Oh, yeah, real good." She gives a fleeting glance at the mouthwatering fruit that had held her attention previously. "What're you guys up to?"
"Just shopping around, you know." Ashley looks into the crowd for a second, searchingly. "Actually, I've got somethin' I've been wantin' to do. You wanna stay here an' help Mads out a little, Spence'?" It's not really a question, and the blonde knows enough to not take it as one. She nods and watched Ashley as she disappears into the crowd, heading away from them intently.
"Wonder what that was about," Madison says, thoughtfully, from behind her.
"I don't--," Spencer's eyebrows furrow, "I don't know."
--
Ashley catches Jim just as he's ducking into one of the many dark alleys that cover the place. She shouts his name as he strides through the crowd, sure it's him even though she's only seen the back of a gray, balding head and his clothing. He doesn't turn.
When she finally reaches him, she grabs his forearm and yanks him back slightly. He yelps and turns to her, eyes wild. She grins triumphantly when she sees his face, confirms his identity.
"Hey, Jim."
"Oh, hi Ashley!" He pulls her into a hug, obviously trying to hide his ignoring her earlier. "How are you?" He looks even more ragged than usual – dark circles under his eyes, bones protruding.
"I'm fine, good. We're just picking up some supplies before we head out again." She turns to the mass just outside the alley, searches for a moment, then turns back to the man standing nervously before her. "Madison and Spencer are--."
"Spencer?" His eyes widen and a hand comes up to play with the few wisps of hair that remain on his head. "Spencer's still with you?"
"Yeah," she says, slowly. "She's been with us for a long time now."
"Really? I just…I thought…" He trailed off, fingers clenching and unclenching on his balding head. Ashley's eyebrows furrowed.
"Do you have a problem with her?"
"What? No, no. She's…I don't…" Ashley had refused to blame Jim for what happened to Spencer in the Underground, when it first occurred. She didn't even want to think he had anything to with it, but his hesitance was setting off an alarm in her head.
She had to know. "You set up that attack, didn't you?" He flinched, closing his eyes in answer. "You're the reason she…" She couldn't find the words to express the total betrayal of this man, the person who had helped her get back on her feet after everything she loved and cherished was gone. It hurt so much it was almost hard to breathe. Her fist clenched tightly by the side of her leg.
"Don't you know who she is, Ashley?" he said, exasperated. "She's the enemy, she's--," his sentence was cut off by the arrival of the very blonde, blue-eyed girl they were talking about. She stepped out of the crowd and smiled upon seeing Ashley, grabbing her arm excitedly.
"Ashley, I found something I think you'll like!" She looks to the person Ashley was talking to and stiffens, smile dropping. Ashley can feel the blonde's grip tighten on the muscles in her arm. "Oh, hello." Jim nods, trying to force a smile, only managing a weak twitch of his lips.
When no one says anything, he sighs. "I think I'm gonna get goin'," he points a thumb down the alley where he was heading before. Ashley nods, but remains silent, as does Spencer, whose knuckles are white, gripping hard enough to leave a bruise on Ashley's tan skin.
"It was nice seeing you – both of you." He turns to leave and Ashley thinks about tearing away from Spencer, turning Jim by the shoulder and punching him till he bleeds. The thought passes. He disappears into the darkness and both girls visibly relax when he's out of sight.
"I'm sorry, Spencer." Ashley reaches down to grip Spencer's hand tightly in her own.
"It's done, now." They leave the alley and slip back into the crowd. Her former animated state returns. "I think you'll really like this, Ash'." She squeezes Ashley's hand and they head off to find the source of her excitement.
--
"This is awesome, Spence'!" Ashley holds the battered guitar reverentially. The girls had found it at a booth in the far corner, halfway in the shadows. She turns it, holds it as if she was going to play. Her thumb strums the strings lightly. "It's beautiful," she whispers.
--
"OK, last one, make it count!" Ashley's fingers flew over the strings, bringing forth strong sounds. Kyla straightened from her place on the floor in front of Ashley. She wiggled excitedly, waiting for the moment. Jess smiled at her enthusiasm as she sat with her back against the armrest of the couch, feet against Ashley's thigh. Ashley nodded and grinned as Jess and Kyla began to sing.
"He goes wa wa, wa wa wa, waltzing with bears! Raggy bears, shaggy bears, baggy bears too! And there's nothing on earth Uncle Walter won't do! So he can go waltzing, wa wa wa waltzing. He can go waltzing, go waltzing with bears!" Ashley ended the song with a flourish; Jess and Kyla clapped excitedly, cheering for the performance.
"Now it's time for bed little one." Ashley stood, leaning her guitar against he couch carefully. She picked up the whining little girl, starting for the stairs. "Stop your cryin', we'll have plenty more nights like this."
Kyla raised her head from her sister's shoulder, big blue eyes shining. "Promise?"
"I promise."
--
"Ash'?" No response. "Ashley?" When she still got no response, Spencer whacked Ashley on the arm, surprising her. She looked to the other girl, confused.
"What?"
"I kind of lost you there."
"Oh, sorry, I was just…just daydreaming I guess." She looked to the guitar in her hands, almost as if she was shocked to find it there.
"It's OK. Do you like it?" Spencer lay a hand over Ashley's shoulder cautiously.
"Hm? Oh, yeah, it's great. Thank you, Spencer." She kissed the blonde on the cheek quickly, and then began inspecting her new instrument. Spencer stayed silent; she had traded her best blanket for the thing.
--
They headed to camp soon after that, laden down with the supplies Madison had managed to trade for. They made a fire quickly, as it was getting dark and, as soon as that was done and dinner was cooking on the fire, Ashley settled down with her new find.
She reveled in feeling an instrument in her hands again – it felt like so long since she last had. She strummed the strings lightly, playing different chords and notes with no specific song.
"Play something?" Ashley looked up, startled.
"Do you want me to?" Spencer nodded, smiling brightly, and Madison nodded grudgingly.
"OK…" She thought for a moment, then began to play a song. As she continued to play, each girl could hear her singing quietly. "My Uncle Walter goes dancing with bears…"