Note-Thanks to all my faithful reviewers. You guys make my days. Also, I made him British because…well, doesn't he have an accent? Or am I the only one?
Of course, Snoop Dogg Attending was not the only one with a hated nickname. There also stand another Background Man looking in on the action, just there. Always there, never moving, never speaking, apart from the protest which has become his catchphrase:
It's Beardfacé, damnit!
Seymour Beardfacé patrolled the doors of Sacred Heart, ignoring the greetings that were flung his way. Every time someone got his name wrong, it was like someone had chucked an unexpected Jiggly ball at his head.
He made his way into the cafeteria, and sat down at a table. Presently he felt something flick at his chin, and he turned his head sharply. Dr Dorian and Dr Kelso were sitting at a table, eating. Seymour sighed as he saw their plates. Macaroni day.
He turned back, as he felt a few more pieces of pasta slap his face. He pretended not to notice. One day, he was sure; he would snap and destroy the cafeteria. He just had to try and pretend to be normal until that day came. Whenever it was.
He got, and chucked the remainder of his chicken mayo sandwich in the bin. Stalking out of the room, he made his way into the on-cal room. He'd just had a night shift, and needed to sleep. He lay down on the bed, and his eyes gradually began to close…
"Seymour? Seymour!"
Seymour turned. He was ten years old again, and a pretty young woman was standing in front of him.
"Seymour, darling! Where were you?" she asked. She had a pretty British accent, dark hair that was almost black and a floral dress that hung off her petite frame.
"Sorry, mummy! I was playing doctors!" Seymour laughed. He ran up to his mother. She enveloped him in a hug, and he squirmed as she kissed his cheek.
"Seymour?" came a gruffer voice. Seymour wriggled out of his mother's arms to see an older man standing there.
"You shouldn't run off, Seymour! Mummy and me where very worried!" said the German man.
"But I'm a big boy!" Seymour protested. "I can go where I want to!"
"You can't spend your time playing doctors!"
"Yes I can, daddy! I'm going to go to America and be a famous doctor and help sick people get better!"
"You can't go, you're much too young!" chimed in his mother.
"No, I'm old…" said Seymour. Suddenly, he realised that his face had sprouted a thick, bushy beard, and it was growing rapidly, covering his face whole face and his body…
"You have an old man's beard, Beardface!" yelled his mother.
"Beardface, Beardface…" his parents called out, and suddenly Seymour's beard was covering his mouth so he couldn't breath…
Seymour gasped, and woke up with a start.
"Beardface? Beardface?" said Dr Turk, who was standing in the doorway. "Your patient Mr Davidson needs to be prepped for surgery"
Then he left.
Seymour sighed, and lay back. He would snap someday. Just a matter of wait and see, was all. Wait and see…