Disclaimer: Don't own it. But the original characters belong to me, obviously.

Author Note: I know it's kind of lame or whatever to be posting on Halloween night, but I am so grateful to those of you who reviewed, read, or even just passed by that I decided to do a little quick update before I go and join in on the festivities. Thank you all so much, you've truly inspired me to write this thing, and to keep it going.

How much would you bet
that if I tried hard enough
I would spontaneously combust
I wish I could disappear
and run away from all of my fear
I think I'm coming undone.
Constant Knot, City & Colour

Chapter Two

That night, I slept in a tent on First Beach with Rae and Sofie. My sister was oddly amenable to the prospect of sleeping on the ground, and that surprised me. Usually the diva, Sofie under normal circumstances would never agree to this closeness between she, I, and our cousin in such proximity to nature. But I think she saw the look in my mother's eyes as she asked of her to do this – that pained look that she had such trouble concealing on this day of every year. My mother could've given Sofie that look for the rest of their lives, and Sofie would always do as she asked.

"Rem," she whispered, once the soft sounds of Rae's snoring began. She prodded me gently with her hand through her sleeping bag, and looked directly into my eyes. "I want to be there for mom. Tomorrow, when they clear out grandma and grandpa's house."

"So be there for her," I whispered back.

"What do I do? She'd think I was making fun if I just walked right up to her and grabbed her hand."

"Sofie, if your intentions are honorable, mom will see that." I cracked a small smile in support of her. My little sister, who knew she could care about anyone but herself?

"We were so young, weren't we?" She laid her cheek on the pillow, and moved her eyes far away, to where I couldn't reach her. "It still feels like the world is crashing around us, and it's been five years."

I reached my hand forward to brush the hair out of her eyes, and rested it there on her cheek. "I feel like that might change. Once there's nothing left to remind them, it will be easier for them to move on."

Sofie nodded her head up and down, and slowly let her droopy eyes fall closed. "Love you, Remy."

"You too, Sof."

---

I watched my family from where our tent stood. They were all in a group, but still moving independently of each other toward the red house. My mother walked in first, then my father, and Charlie followed close behind. They all fell in line, no doubt cramping inside the small space, until I was the only person not inside.

I took my time disassembling our tent. Everyone else had already done theirs, and packed them away into the trunks of cars. I took the iron spikes out of the ground first, removed the aluminum poles where they were propping up the worn tent fabric, then folded it all up, and shoved it inside the bag it had come from, but seemed too small to fit anything of consequence now. To me, it seemed that no time had passed at all. But in reality, the short amount of time it should've taken me started out at one hour, then bled into two.

"Remy!" Elijah called from the front porch, waving his arms about his head. "Remy, we're going to get lunch! Do want to come?" I felt one corner of my mouth twitch. Elijah was always so blissfully unaffected by everything. My father stepped out of the dark doorway, and placed his hand on Elijah's shoulder, his eyes squinting down at me through his glasses. He looked like a stranger to Elijah, this dark-haired boy that looked solely my mother's. He smiled bleakly, and his head tilted toward the ground. Though my father knew the significance of this cleansing, as the years piled up, I knew that he found it harder and harder to give a damn.

I shook my head. "No!" I yelled back at him, and saw him nod. He, my father, and our cousins Lily, Blake and Holden formed a line behind each other down the porch steps, and climbed into his car.

I heaved the strap of the tent bag over my shoulder, digging my feet into the sand of the hill where our cars were parked. I popped the trunk of my terribly outdated Nissan, now nothing but an antique, and tossed it into the empty space. I leaned back against the trunk, and folded my arms over my chest. I must have stood that way for 15 minutes without moving; just a statue of myself, and the role I played here.

My uncle Billy and Janice came out holding hands, Danny and Rae scowling at Janice's back behind them.

"Well, Remy," Billy said to me, in his rich, deep voice. "It was great seeing you, kid. But we'll catch back up in Seattle, huh?" He didn't wait for my answer to turn, pulling Janice behind him, and walk to his car.

"Love you, Remy girl," Rae said, pulling me into a tight squeeze. "I'll come by with the truck on Sunday morning, okay? Bright and early." Her attempt at a smile was weak.

"Oh, Jesus," I moaned. "I still have so much packing to do."

"See ya, Remy." Danny pulled me into a one-armed hug, and let me go quickly.

I watched as they walked to Billy's car, just as still as before, and waved to them as they drove away. I took in a deep breath, my eyes focused on the front door, the threshold I had gone through so many times, but now, would feel so different. My legs seemed to move by themselves, one foot in front of the other, until I was standing just behind the doorframe, looking in at my aunt Tessa, my uncle Liam, and my mother, Naomi, go through the ruin that had once been the lives of their parents. Already, there were piles of black trash bags in one corner of the living room, taking up a huge amount of their space. It looked like a great, looming monster, something that would come to life at the drop of a hat.

"Need help?" I asked, self-conscious of my voice and how it echoed in the space of the living room.

"Oh, Remy, there you are," my mother breathed, her hand over her heart. "Could you…" She stopped speaking, her whole face drawn into a pucker. "Could you please go into your grandmother's room with this?" She held a scary black trash bag out at me.

"Sure, mom," I told her, and grabbed the bag from her hand. I now completely understood the power of that look, and its hold over Sofie.

"Sofie, honey," my mom called into the kitchen where Sofie sat at the small, worn wooden table, examining her nails, "please go help your sister."

We rifled through everything - drawers, the closet, and the bathroom that was exclusive to the bedroom. I couldn't bring myself to trash any of it. Sofie was filing through all of Bella's clothes, now moth-eaten and falling apart. She had somehow wedged herself between the closet door and the clothes on their hangers, and was having a hard time getting herself free. She pushed against the inside wall, propelling herself into the depths of the middle of the closet. A whirlwind of dust and debris followed her after her fall, and billowed in clouds throughout the room.

Sofie coughed violently, and fanned the air in front of her face. She got down on all fours, and crawled from where she fell, but got her foot caught in a loose floorboard in the middle of the dark closet.

"Remy," she coughed, "help!"

She continued to inhale the stale air and the dirt, coughing while I coughed, and tried to pry her foot loose. "Hold still!" I told her, wheeling the floorboard around the nail that secured it to the foundation. Sofie fell forward, her elbows smacking against the hardwood flooring, once free.

"Shit!" She exclaimed, her expression bewildered, and her head and shoulders covered in a thick layer of grey dust. "I did not sign up to get eaten by the closet of my dead grandmother." She stood, brushing herself off, and wailed a fake sob as she caught her reflection in the mirror. "My hair!"

I got down on my knees, crawled to the place where Sofie was caught, and tried to shove the floorboard back in its spot. But it was now bent and damaged, and wouldn't fall back into it's place without extra force. "Damn it," I mumbled, and rested on my side on the dark floor. "Sofie, could you give me some light? I can't see anything down here…"

Sofie crossed the room to the window where the curtains were drawn, and tossed them aside, so they flew on their rods. More dust filled the room from the dirty shades. I moved my hand over the displaced floorboard, and back again, and noticed a twinkling light coming from underneath the floor. "What…?"

I lifted myself back onto my knees, grabbed the board with both hands, and threw my weight into ripping it from the ground. It creaked and groaned, and made a loud screeching noise as I ripped it away.

"Remy! What the hell are you doing?"

I didn't answer her right away, and threw the board to the side, then dove back into the closet. I reached my hand inside the cavity, and it fell on several hard objects – light, and smooth to the touch, like books. I grabbed them, selfish, and hungry for another secret hidden beneath the floorboards of Bella's house. I lifted out two of the books, and another, larger one, bound with fabric, and thick.

In the light, I knew exactly what they were.

"Diaries?" Sofie asked, and bent to pick one up.

"And a photo album," I said, and brushed the dust away from the cover.

Sofie pulled at the lock, but soon gave up trying. "It's locked. Is there a key down there?"

I dove down again, reached my hand back into the cavity, groping in the darkness, but didn't find anything. I looked up at her from the floor, and I could feel the hunger engulf me, take over every other inclination. "Look through the drawers. I'll search the bathroom."

Sofie opened every drawer Bella had, and closed each one as she didn't find a key. "Jewelry box," she said to herself. "Look in the jewelry box."

In the medicine cabinet, there was a dish lined with small earrings, a bracelet, and a locket. I lifted the dish, poured its contents out into my hand, and sifted through. No key.

"Anything?" I called to Sofie.

"No," she said back, slamming drawer after drawer, "nothing."

"Shit." I poured everything in my hand back into the dish. A gold locket, plain with just Bella's initials slid off my hand, onto the floor, and popped open. A single, silver key tumbled out onto the linoleum. "Sofie," my voice was shaking as I swooped to pick up the key, "I think I found it."

Sofie shoved the first diary into my hands. I held the small, round key in my fingers perfectly over the lock. Now that I could have it, I wasn't sure I was ready to know what was on the inside.

"Come on," Sofie urged. "Open it!"

I took in a breath. What was written on those pages might or might not answer every question I had ever had about my grandmother. I felt so unprepared for the answers – they had dropped in so suddenly.

I placed the key into the lock – a perfect fit – and turned it clockwise. Click. A single, pristine photograph fell from within it, and floated to the ground.