"Will you try to make me feel better, or run away? Say ok…"

Gabriella trailed off with her hand pressed against the frozen glass that was all too thick, for her. She wanted to reach out and touch his bronzing skin, his trembling hand, his swollen face. Even though she spent her entire night the previous evening, it didn't seem enough to feel him against her. Her arms didn't seem to heal the way they might have before things were out in the open.

Nothing happened last night. Well, nothing sexual happened. Gabriella spent a sleepless night with her arms wrapped tightly around Troy's sobbing body. At around two AM he finally seemed to torture himself to sleep, while Gabriella did her best to try to attain some rest. From the dark circles under her eyes, it was evident that she had not.

Now, they hadn't spoken a word to each other since last night. Their body motions were enough to say what they could while in the studio. Troy's thousand pound head stared distantly towards the soundboard, Gabriella knowing he was deeply in thought, along with her own. The singing seemed to flow more naturally today, and with one robotic movement of his head, lifted so his light orbs locked with her cloudy ones.

His eyes were different today. A milky silver instead of the sharp white she was getting used to. It could have also been the navy dress shirt he was wearing, for their away basketball game was tonight. Troy almost had, embarrassment written on his face. Embarrassment from what? Letting out emotions? His mother? None of these things deserved to be embarrassed about. Did he not feel like a man because he was in tears all night? That was stupid.

Unable to take their separation and silence any longer, Gabriella removed the oversized headphones from her tiny head and trotted out of the crowded sound booth. She took gentle steps forward, noting the red rims in the white spots of his eyes proving his acidic tears last night. "Troy…" Her voice was horse as he flinched at the sound of his name.

He trained his eyes to remain forward, staring blankly at nothing with his jaw set. Gabriella tenderly, Gabriella fell to her knees, letting her jeans connect with the hard ground. Her hand brushed the softness of her fitted ruby tee before making her way between his legs, though his head still remained stationed to the side, avoiding her eyes at all cost. "Troy please… please say something…." She begged while slipping her hand over his shaking thigh.

Her hand began to gingerly caress the inside just to calm him down. There were no other motives as she gently placed a soft hand against his cheek to smooth out the frown lines. But his head turned again just to shake her off. "There's nothing to say."

It sounded like he had never spoken before. The rasp almost caused Gabriella to drop her hand on his knee. "Please Troy…" She pleaded with as much passion in her voice as she could muster. Troy's grey eyes finally turned to find hers, Gabriella almost letting her own tears slip again as tiny trickles swam down his face.

Desperation was evident as she reached up to press a sloppy kiss against the side of his statue face. He didn't move. The only notation that he was alive was the sound of his beating heart. So she kissed his face again, trying to bring something out. Anything. She would have rather had him screaming than this. Gabriella's mouth danced across his cold skin until they connected with his frozen lips. The hand that wasn't resting on his knee gripped the back of his sturdy neck.

He kissed back, but it was so mechanical, it gave Gabriella shivers of fear. She silently begged for him to wrap his strong arms around her protectively, but they remained at his side. His lips moved with hers, but there was no fire, no electrical waves that surged through her blood stream. A tiny tear trickled down her face as she pulled away, pressing her forehead to his lips. Not the other way around. "Troy…"

It was like his mind wasn't there; she was just kissing an empty shell.

Unexpectedly, she felt a wave a freezing fire wrap around her frail body. Troy's muscles clenched as he held her with one arm, Gabriella tensing hopefully. Her brown eyes closed, feeling a small triumphant curse soar through her. She got him to show a small form of affection, even if all he did was wrap an arm around her back. It didn't matter. It was emotion. It was feeling, it was a sense that he was still alive. "I love you." Gabriella mumbled in a tiny voice. It might have been her imagination, but Troy seemed to have tilted his head the slightest bit foreword to inhale the scent of her hair.

"I can't…" Troy's voice cracked under pressure against her smooth forehead. Stiffly, yet slowly, he brought his hand around to push her thin shoulders away from his lips. The murky gray of his eyes depressed Gabriella's hope, crushing it back to the ground. "I can't do this. Not here, not now."

"When then?" Gabriella pressed in a shaking voice as Troy shook his heavy head and rose from the large chair, letting her fall pathetically to her knees.

"I don't know." His voice was almost a whisper before he stared at her for a moment longer, almost a longing written in his face, before turning robotically to the door.

It was Gabriella's turn to stare blankly into space, only listening to the sounds of his dress shoes against the linoleum and the opening of the studio door. Distraught blinded her from the fact that Troy never closed the door again. Her heart twisted before it burst. She just had to keep telling herself that he was vulnerable right now. But was he? Was he ever going to get better? She knew without a doubt that no matter what, she would stick with him. But would he do the same? If he found out that her own past might be just as twisted and sick as his, would he still want her? Would he be ok with every shattered thing about her? Would he be able to handle an abused victim and a drug user?

Doubt scrunched in horror as the rain of tears dribbled down her face, yet they were silent. It was as though she had been sucked into a black hole and was being stretched into a glob of mush. She couldn't take her eyes off the chair her love was present in previously, wishing, praying that he would come back. She sang to him moments ago that she wanted him to say ok. Say everything would be alright. Come back to tell her he would be fine. That he loved her.

"Okay."

Her heart skipped four beats at the sound of the almost immeasurable voice. The head filled with fluid turned to the door to see Troy piercing his colorless eyes to her, his still swollen bottom lip trembling. The overwhelming feeling of helplessness was crushed by another prayer. He was still standing in the doorway. He never actually walked out the door as she thought. "What?" Her confusion lacing into her tone as she nudged forward on the hard ground.

Troy took a defining step back, showing her that he didn't want her to close the distance. Almost like he was so desperate to make her understand something, yet he needed space. It took a moment for her to realize that his motions meant he wanted her to know he loved her, but he needed time to accept the fact that she now knew about his mom. "You asked me to say it…"

Gabriella's broken heart cracked again. He was referring to the song she just sang to him. "T…"

"Okay." Troy whispered a final time before finally turning around and shutting the door, leaving Gabriella in tears, yet letting her heart know he loved her.

She was getting sick of this destruction.

"You guys ready?" Andrews boomed in the locker-room, causing two sophomores almost slammed into the red paint from fright at the coach. The tight ringlets bounced as Chad laughed and pointed at the younger classmen. "Bus leaves in five… Richards put some pants on damn it!" The coach yelled at a junior who was in the middle of grabbing a pair of his uniform shorts to cover his bright yellow boxers.

"Idiot." Chad mumbled under his breath before turning to the face of horror beside him.

Troy sighed before resting his throbbing head against the metal lockers behind him. He inhaled the tart smell of sweat that made the locker-room famous, attempting to intoxicate his mind clear of all tormenting thoughts. This whole constant pain thing was beginning to get on his nerves. The ones that weren't coated in embarrassment for his behavior the previous night while Gabriella's arms held him protectively.

"Bolton, you're coming to my party after we smash them right?" Zeke questioned excitedly, Troy barely hearing what he was saying. Party, after the game… right.

"Uh… yeah." His voice was unrecognizable, even to himself. He felt less like Troy Bolton than ever before, but not in the way he wanted to feel. He felt as though a large chunk of him flew off into the night, never to return. Troy lifting his somewhat shaking hands and rubbed his temples profusely.

The last thing he wanted to do was play a basketball game right now. Actually, the only thing he really wanted to do was crawl into his bed and close his eyes, pretending last night never happened. How could he get that vulnerable to Gabriella? He swore he wasn't going to hurt her anymore, and the look on her face this morning in the sound booth was as of horror. He smashed her again, even when he promised himself he wouldn't.

"Captain, let's go." Chad shoved at Troy's unbalanced shoulder, causing him almost to stumble to the floor from the shock. He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't even seem to noticed the irritability on Chad's chocolate face.

"Sorry." Troy mumbled inaudibly before using his strength to lift the heavy red gym bag and following the rest of the basketball team like a zombie.

It seemed as though all his energy had been drawn from him. His enthusiasm for life vanquished. He hadn't given a thought about what would happen if he had been so vulnerable to Gabriella. Never once had he believed that she would actually meet his past, let alone have it be last night. Everything was such a blur now. He promised himself he would not let her in. He didn't want to destroy her anymore than he already had. He failed. That was what was torturing Troy the most. The knowledge that he failed in his quest to protect her. If he couldn't even shield his girlfriend from his past, how would he ever be able to shield his mother from Charlie?

Not until he felt his aching butt connect with the ripped bus seat did he realize that they had officially loaded and Chad was stationed next to him with a hard look on his face. Troy slouched in his seat, pulling out his black ipod and gazing out the window into the brisk surroundings. The shadows of the mountain were cast over the valley East High sat in a contrast to the orange glow of the setting sun. A distressed sigh released from his rough throat before he tried to pull himself from reality. Imagine a place where he could go and never have to worry about anything.

Every place he tried to escape to, Gabriella was there.

"We talked." Chad's excited tone didn't match his angered face as Troy turned to him in the dark. The rest of the bus was buzzing with excitement from the game tonight, so Troy knew their conversation would not be over heard.

"As in Taylor?" He questioned, finding his voice unrecognizable. Did he really always sound this raspy and pained?

"Yeah." His curls bounced as he nodded.

"And?" Troy almost sounded impatient. He just wanted to be left alone in his thoughts.

"We're uhh… friends again. We're gonna try to take it slow, and see where it goes from there," A tiny smile coursed his face that didn't match with his hard eyes boring into Troy's gray milk colored orbs. "She said she wanted to be with me."

"That's great man." Troy mumbled before gazing out the window once again, hoping that Chad would just stop talking.

"Yeah. It is." Chad almost seethed. "For once I'm getting the girl."

"I'm proud." His eyes were still trained off into the distance, and he turned the volume up on his sleek ipod to drown out the excess sounds of the Wildcats.

He didn't see the red fumes come from beside him. "Fuck it Bolton… can't you not be so damn selfish for like two minutes?"

Troy's head snapped back to his best friend who had murder written in his brown eyes. He pulled the tiny earbud out of his drum and raised a dark eyebrow. "What?" He questioned with a sick confusion.

Chad's eyes rolled obnoxiously. "Can't you just shove all your shit away for five minutes and pretend like you're happy for me? The girl I've wanted since… well forever just said she wanted to be with me. All you can fucking do is mope."

Troy's eyes flashed a shade of white, but seemed to be too tired to completely change back to the horrific blinding headlights he had previously. "Ok yeah… I'll just put my shit on hold for you. 'Hey Mom? Can you stop using for like a day? I have to celebrate with Chad that he's got Taylor.'''

Chad's animalistic characteristics broke through. "You're mom has been clean for while Bolton."

"That will change once the fucker comes back." Troy hissed angrily. Chad was his best friend, why was he acting like this would be easy for Troy?

"Dude, you've been like shit for weeks now. I hate it!" Chad announced unknowingly by the fellow teammates. The gray seat suddenly felt smaller as Troy felt Chad almost… betraying him.

"I'm sorry," Troy responded sarcastically. "It's not like I haven't been burning in hell or anything."

"I don't care that you are!" Chad roared. "Yeah… I'm sorry you have to go through this shit, but news flash Bolton, other people have had drug users for parents."

Troy narrowed his tired eyes. "My dad…"

"And people's dads were dicks and left too. The only difference between them and you is that you sit there and feel sorry for yourself." Chad shot at him as though he was holding a rifle.

Why was he doing this to his best friend? Troy suddenly felt a wave of guilt that wouldn't subside. He couldn't help the pain he felt. Why couldn't Chad understand that? For so long his best friend had always been behind him. But now what? "I don't…"

"Don't bullshit. You've been fucking depressed since freshman year. Gabs…" Troy's heart skipped a beat at the sound of his girlfriend's name. "… comes along and for once you're like… normal. Now you're just… suck to be around. God, I'm surprised she hasn't dumped your ass yet."

That was a really good thought that clouded Troy's mind too.

"I DON'T HAVE CONTROL OVER ANYTHING!" Troy snapped, surprised that people didn't turn around to look at him. The bus was already filled with cheers of excited joy that they were def to their captain.

"That's your problem. I'm done watching you waste your life. You only get one, and you've done a pretty shitty job of living it so far." Chad glared darkly.

Troy let that thought ponder. Chad was right.

"Sorry." He apologized in an almost silent voice.

"Whatever." Chad mumbled angrily before popping his own ear buds into his chocolate ears and leaned back. The conversation was over.

Troy trained his eyes back on the empty window again. Was Chad right? Had he really been just feeling sorry for himself all this time? But how could he not! He had been through so much, yet it all felt so overwhelming he could barely stand it. Flashes of the mountainous scenery passed by.

He had been so focused on keeping Gabriella out of his past, so determined, yet he failed. Was that really what he should have been focusing on though? Troy's course hands felt his practice ball beneath the rough surface of his gym bag. The ball was in his hands, but was he playing the right game? Should his energy have been focused on getting himself out instead of keeping Gabriella from getting inside?

The bus slowed to an abrupt stop, almost knocking some sense back into him. Chad abruptly stood, obviously still angered. Another seeping round of guilt tainted Troy's blood stream. Chad WAS right. He was almost always depressed, and it wasn't fair to his best friend. His best friend who had been there through everything, and Troy couldn't even offer congratulations for finally getting Taylor.

He was scum.

In response though, his heart almost became a pound lighter. Chad was completely right. He had to do something. He had been attacking all the other components to the puzzle, trying to fix them instead of the real problem. His pain and angst still bled through his skin, but his mind seemed to be steering in a cleaner direction. It was a start.

"Chad!" Troy called after he stepped off the bus into the icy air. The back of the white hoodie stopped before Troy's own warm up jacket fell from his head. He did everything in his power to try to flush his cheeks in color and try to feel something. The act was put up, he had to do it. "Dude… you're right."

Chad's eyebrow rose curiously. "About what?"

Troy sighed before staring at his old ratty sneakers, knowing they would change in a matter of moments to his new basketball shoes. "I don't know… everything I guess…" his heavy head rose, a flash of a tiny cerulean light almost caused Chad to jump backwards, but it was gone the moment it arrived. "… I gotta stop taking three pointers when they're not going in. Driving it's gonna give me more game."

What that meant was, he had to stop avoiding the problem and take the bull by the horns. He was gonna have to go in and solve what was causing this… all of this. He couldn't loose his best friend, and he couldn't loose Gabriella. Sulking wasn't going to do anything. For the first time in almost three years, he realized it. What he should have done all along. Whether it destroyed him to do it or not. He just had to muster the courage to do it. It was now or never.

He just needed time.

For the first time all night, Chad flashed a triumphant smile and patted Troy roughly on the back, for the first time all day he finally felt the small effect of no sleep as he almost fell over. "Dude… the basketball analogies have gotta stop. You're giving me a headache…"

And for the first time in weeks, Troy flashed a smile that was actually meaningful. "That's why I'm your captain… Game on."

He wasn't referring to the game that would be starting in a few moments.

The fight against his pain started.

For real this time.

He was getting sick of this destruction.

A/N: I'm not sure I like this chapter at all, but I tried to point out how tired both Troy and Gabriella are of their own pain. It really didn't come out the way I wanted it to, but it was hard to write their torment after watching HSM3 and being estatic because it was so amazing. Anyways, thanks for your reviews, because they are really amazing!