Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers.

Author's notes: Yeah, I know, this is a little silly chapter. It doesn't go well with the other, more dark chapters. But anyway, here you go.

The Gossip Column

Starscream woke up to the warm feeling of someone holding him.

He opened his optics.

Megatron.

He couldn't stop the smile that crawled to his lips. Megatron was beside him. And last night...

Last night they had spent together, in every meaning of the word.

He slowly sat up, not wanting to wake the silver mech. He looked so peaceful. How strange. Used to seeing Megatron only mad, fighting or talking about the Autobots, Starscream couldn't tear his optics off of the silver mech's solemn face.

He touched Megatron's nose with a single finger. No reaction.

Starscream wondered briefly what was the tyrant dreaming about. Probably something nice, since he was so quiet and still.

Should Starscream leave before he woke up?

He soon noticed it was too late for that, as Megatron moved a little and then opened his optics.

As soon as the silver mech registered who he was looking at, a smile crept to his lips.

"Starscream." He stated quietly, still half asleep.

"Megatron." Came the Seeker's answer.

Megatron yawned and streched his limbs. Starscream chuckled. He looked so cute. The silver mech's optics concentrated on the still giggling Air Commander. He turned on his side and rested his head on his palm.

"What's so funny? Never seen a mech wake up before?" Megatron demanded, pretending upset.

"Yes, I have. But you looked so cute." Starscream let out another giggle.

"Oh yeah? You want to laugh? I'll give you something to laugh about!"

Starscream yelped as big hands landed amazingly fast on his sides and started to tickle him. In a matter of seconds, Megatron was sitting on his legs, preventing him from moving. It was torture! Starscream tried to push the hands away, to no avail.

"No! Please, stop!" Starscream pleaded between his laugh. "I'm begging you!"

"Oh, you're begging me? I've heard that one before, it's not enough! I want something more!" Megatron yelled playfully.

Starscream was sure he would die soon from laughter.

"Anything, anything!" The laughing Seeker managed to say. The torturing hands slowed down their pace and then stopped completely.

Starscream was panting, worn-out. Megatron smiled in triumph. The Seeker glared daggers at the mech sitting on him. How humiliating! Megatron leaned closer.

"Due to my victory, you are obliged to come to me every night from now on. No excuses." There was a playful spark in Megatron's optics. Starscream decided to try the mech's patience and play hard to get. He pulled a diva-like scowl on his face and sighed like a martyr.

"How about once a week? I don't think I can bear to see you every nigh-" The rest were left unsaid as the tickle-torture began again.

"This is not a negotiation! Do you yield?"

Starscream tried to nod his head, but it was hard when his whole body was shaking from laughter.

"I yield, I yield!" The Seeker promised. And then he was left gasping for air to his systems.

Megatron brought his face close to Starscream's again.

"Excellent." He said, grinning down on the gasping Seeker. Then the silver mech planted a kiss on Starscream's nose and got up from the berth. Starscream sat up again and watched as Megatron brought two cubes of energon to the berth. The silver mech placed one beside himself as he sat down and offered the other to Starscream.

Starscream took the cube and flashed a smile to Megatron. "Thank you. All that laughing got me thirsty." He took a long sip and put the cube then aside. His optics widened as he saw the empty cube in Megatron's hands. He pointed it with his finger.

"How did you... How can it be empty already? I took just one sip and yours is already empty??"

Megatron sneered and tossed the cube on the floor. It shattered. Starscream was shocked by his leader's bad manners. Megatron laughed at his expression.

"You act like a femme!" Megatron leaned closer to his Air Commander. "And you also drink like a femme." He finished.

Starscream let out an angry scream and stormed upon his leader. Megatron only laughed even more as his back hit the berth.

"You even scream like a femme! And look at this," Megatron threw his hands in the air, "no hands!" He stated and easily rolled them over.

Starscream squeeled and squirmed as Megatron's greater weight was on him. He was so heavy!

Megatron had evidently calmed down as he reached for Starscream's lips with his own. Starscream tried to stop him but it didn't work. Megatron was so much more powerful than himself. So he decided to let it go. But first...

"Ouch! Why did you bit me??" Megatron demanded, now sitting up and wiping the energon from his bottom lip. Starscream smirked.

"Call it a revenge. Can you get off me now?"

Surprisingly, Megatron did as asked, still glaring at the Seeker. Starscream sat up and waved his legs off the berth.

"You know, I should probably go now. Before the others wake up. You don't want any rumors or gossips, do you Megatron?" Starscream asked.

Megatron rubbed his chin, as if he was pondering.

"No. I don't think I do. Though, it sounds good, doesn't it?" He asked.

Starscream, who had just stood up, frowned questioningly.

"What sounds good?" He asked. Megatron stood up from his berth and walked to the Seeker. He waved his hand before Starscream's optics.

"I can already see the headlines; The evil Decepticon leader and his even eviler Second-In-Command: A wild night together. Even the Autobots would read it! Sounds pretty good, don't you agree?"

Starscream chuckled. "It sounds terrible, Megatron!"

The Decepticon leader rubbed his chin again. "I know. I have to come up with a new headline."

Starscream leaned his head against Megatron's chest, still chuckling. As Megatron noticed what he had on his chest cavity, he pulled the Seeker into a warm embrace. He kissed the helm under his chin. They stayed like that for a long time.

Then suddenly, Megatron's comm. link went on. Someone was calling him.

He looked down on Starscream. "It's Soundwave. I am probably needed in the control room."

Starscream understood what the silver mech was implying; Starscream couldn't stay here. So the Seeker leaned up and kissed Megatron's chin tenderly.

"I love you." He whispered, turned on his heels and quickly left the room before Megatron had a chance to say anything.

What could he even say to that? "Oh, thank you."?? Starscream snorted to himself as he opened the door to the hallway. He took a peek from the door and when he saw no one, he stepped outside and closed the door behind him.

He headed for his private lab, he wanted to think. And that was his personal thinking place.

He completely missed the gleaming optics behind a dark corner.

XXX

Thundercracker lied lazily on his berth. Yet another day off. Wonderful. He didn't need to do anything or go anywhere. He could just lie here on his berth and listen in on the Coneheads' conversations through the wall.

He had been listening in on their lives for an eternity now. Ever since they had gone to Earth. He knew everything about their little lives.

He knew that Dirge hated flavored energon and that Thrust got easily drunk. He knew what time they usually went to recharge and what time they woke up. He knew everything about their life on Earth, down to the last detail. And the Coneheads weren't the only one's.

Thundercracker and Reflector had gathered pictures and gossips about everyone in their headquarters. No one was safe. There was alot of dirty secrets in the Decepticon HQ. They knew most of them. And they got them all on a note pad.

It was surprising how much the 'Cons were ready to pay if Reflector and Thundercracker black-mailed them about their secrets.

But none of them knew the duo made copies of the stories and pictures.

What were the Coneheads talking about now...?

Thundercracker leaned his head against the wall, so he could hear better.

Right at that moment, Skywarp banged into their shared quarters.

"You'll never guess what I just saw!" The black and purple mech yelled.

Thundercracker frowned at him.

"Not now, I can't hear what they're saying!" Thundercracker whispered, signaling to the wall beside him. Skywarp blinked his optics for a moment. Then he waved his hand dismissively in the air.

"This is much more interesting than those Coneheads. Listen..." Skywarp signalled his friend to come closer. Thundercracker sighed, annoyed.

"This had better be good."

Skywarp nodded enthusiasticly. "It is, I promise." Then he lowered his voice into a whisper.

"I saw Starscream in the northern wing." The black and purple Seeker stated.

Thundercracker frowned again.

"So?" He didn't bother to lower his voice. Skywarp signalled him to be quiet.

"So?? Northern wing is where Megatron has his quarters. Don't you get it?"

Thundercracker rubbed his chin.

"No." He dismissed the whole conversation and leaned his head back on the wall.

Dirge was currently complaining about something to Ramjet. Thrust wasn't present.

"TC!" Skywarp yelled, annoyed.

Thundercracker turned to look at him, annoyed as well. "What?"

"I saw Starscream coming out of Megatron's quarters!" The black and purple mech whispered.

Now he got Thundercracker's attention. "Oh, the Creator of all gossips! This is a gold mine! When did you see him?"

"Just this morning, when you were still sleeping."

A knowing smile crept to Thundercracker's lips.

"What were you doing in the northern wing, Skywarp? And this early? You're usually still asleep after I've woken up."

Skywarp stared at his feet.

"Well... I swiped a couple of energon cubes from the main storage room to you--to us. I thought we could use some extra energy in some point..."

Thundercracker sat up in his berth. He folded his arms, still smiling.

"I thought Megatron banned you from teleporting inside the base?"

Skywarp smirked. "True. But when you got it, use it."

Thundercracker chuckled. "I guess so." He knew that Skywarp got bored easily. He was a mech of action.

"So, tell me about what you saw this morning. I want to know all about it."

Skywarp sat beside the blue jet. "Not so fast. Energon first." He pulled out not two, but six cubes.

Thundercracker just stared. "Wow, 'Warp. That's impressive."

He didn't notice how Skywarp blushed.

"Now, tell me about this morning." Thundercracker demanded as he took a sip from his drink.

"Well, after I saw him come out, I wisely hid in the shadowed corner. Then I followed him to the eastern wing, to his lab door. Then I teleported back here."

Thundercracker rubbed his chin.

"You think there's something going on between our leaders?" He asked.

"Uh-huh! You should've seen Screamer's face. He was happy, Thunder'."

"Perhaps he was happy because he just blasted our glorious leader into dust? That never crossed your mind?"

Skywarp shrugged. "I guess I was too busy thinking about your happy face when I brought these cubes back, I didn't think of that..."

Thundercracker gave a hug to his friend. "Thank you, 'Warp. I appreciate it. You're one brave little thief. But you should be more careful. One day Megatron will catch you in action. What are you gonna tell him then?"

Skywarp shrugged again. "I'll worry about it when he catches me." Thundercracker smiled briefly. Skywarp was always so optimistic.

"I'll contact Soundwave and ask him if he's heard anything from Megatron. You know how he's always the first to know about everything. It gets a little creepy sometimes, I admit that I'm scared to pit of him and his collection of little devils..."

Thundercracker opened his comm. link.

"Thundercracker to Soundwave. Do you read me?"

"Affirmative. State your business."

"I was wondering if you had heard from Megatron lately...?"

"Affirmative. At 09:32 contact taken."

"Well, where is he now?"

"Location: Control room."

"Are you there now?"

"Negative."

"Are you going there anytime soon?"

"Affirmative."

Thundercracker rolled his optics to Skywarp.

"Could you take an anonymous message to him from me?"

"Affirmative."

"Tell Megatron that someone saw Astrotrain breaking into the main storage room. Do you copy?"

"Affirmative: An anonymous message from Thundercracker to Megatron: Someone saw Astrotrain breaking into the main storage room."

"Thank--Whoa, wait a minute! Don't mention me! At all, understand?"

As he heard a mocking, monotone voice laughing on the other end of the line, Thundercracker's oil began to boil.

"Are you mocking me Soundwave?"

"Affirmative."

Growling furiously, Thundercracker closed his comm. link and turned to look at Skywarp, who was chuckling. Thundercracker glared daggers at him.

"What? It was kinda funny TC, you gotta admit. If it had been me calling 'the monotone', you'd be the one laughing now." Skywarp stated.

Slowly a faint smile found it's way to Thundercracker's lips.

"You're right. I shouldn't take everything so seriously. Besides, I found out that Megatron's just fine and is currently in the control room."

Skywarp nodded.

"So they do have something going on..."

"Yes, it seems. Unless ol' Megs ordered our Screamer to do house cleaning." Thundercracker played around and Skywarp played along.

"Yeah, I can picture it: Starscream in a maid's costume, cleaning Megatron's feet with his tongue." Skywarp chuckled at the thought.

"Mmmm... And Megs spanking him to get more speed on the job." Thundercracker finished.

"TC!" Skywarp pretended he was shocked. In fact, he was amused as he looked at his friend with new found respect.

Thundercracker was indeed his kind of mechanism.