Disclaimer: *checks* nope. still don't own Inuyasha
Inuyasha held Kagome as she cried against his shoulder. He couldn't even feel the joy of having her pressed up against him. His mind flooded with memories of Miroku and he tried to erase the tightening that grew in his chest. Kagome started to shake as sobs escaped her body. Shippo clung to her shoulder as if it was the last anchor to earth. Small tears ran down his face as he desperately tried not to cry, remembering how Inuyasha had told him that real men didn't cry a while back. He sniffled and buried himself in Kagome's long black hair.
A cool breeze blew down the path as a giant feline landed next to the small huddled group. Kagome pulled her face out of Inuyasha's shoulder, noting dimly the wet puddle she had left on his red haori. He kept a comforting hand on her shoulder as she turned to face the demon slayer that was stone-still on Kirara's back. Sango didn't meet Kagome's teary brown eyes, but instead stared intently at the golden staff that she held clasped in her hand.
"Sango-"Kagome started to say before cutting herself short. What could she even say? She knew, more than the two of them were willing to admit, how much the two had cared for one another. Sango looked up. Her eyes were already red and starting to get puffy. Kagome guessed that she had cried the entire way back from the cliff. Kirara huffed out her sympathy as Sango climbed off her back and into the arms of her waiting friend.
The two young girls cried together. Sango was missing her love, her future. Kagome was missing a good friend. He had always been there for her in moments when she needed wisdom or extra support. He had been there for them all. Sango let down her tough-girl façade and bawled her sorrows into Kagome's shoulder. Kagome held Sango as tears silently wound down her cheeks. Inuyasha kept his hand on Kagome's shoulder, glaring down onto the path. Anger was a much easier emotion for him to feel, so he let himself be mad at anything and everything that could possibly be to blame. He stopped just short of blaming Sango herself for letting her brother do such a thing.
"I couldn't do it," Sango mumbled into Kagome's shoulder. Kagome gently pushed her backwards and asked her to repeat herself. It was still hard to understand through the tears.
"I couldn't make myself do it. I couldn't kill Kohaku for what he had done." Sango met Kagome's brown eyes with her own. Kagome's gaze was filled with sympathy and sorrow. She knew exactly what Sango was talking about. She had pretty much been there. She had seen what Sango had, only through Kohaku's eyes instead. She had felt Kohaku's emotions along with it. He felt so…helpless and sorrowful. Sango's sadness had caused him pain. It confused Kagome that Kohaku would have these feelings while being a complete puppet to Naraku. Could it be that he had broken the spell? Why not tell them then?
The realization hit her like a slap to the face. She tried not to show the shock and if Sango or Inuyasha caught it in her eyes, they didn't say anything. Kagome knew why he wouldn't tell them. He wanted to defeat Naraku from the inside. He wanted to make what he had done wrong, right. But why kill Miroku then? Would he do even that to keep up appearances? Kagome met Sango's eyes again and put one hand on each of Sango's shoulders. She took a deep breath as she wrestled with the words in her mind.
"You did the right thing Sango. He wasn't himself. That wasn't your brother who did this." Kagome watched Sango's reaction. Sango looked down to the path and let her bangs cover her eyes. She let one last tear fall before succumbing to the numbness. Kagome made the decision then and there to keep Kohaku's secret from everyone else. She had to let him keep what little chance he had at sabotaging Naraku. Kagome hooked an arm around Sango's shoulder and walked her to Kirara. The sunshine seemed an utter mockery as it beat down upon the saddened group. Shippo poked his head out from under the shelter of Kagome's hair. He looked up into the sky and hoped for a better tomorrow.
"Let's head back to Kaede's village." Kagome's voice came out in a rough whisper. Sango flopped herself emotionlessly onto Kirara's back. Inuyasha got down on one knee to help Kagome onto his back. She shook her head sadly at him and climbed up behind Sango. She would need all the support she could get at the moment. Inuyasha nodded that he understood as he ran ahead of them to the village. His vision grew blurry as he ran. He allowed only one tear to slide its way down his face and he wiped it away irritably as the forest around him became a blur lost in his emotions.
Two days later found the small group still at Kaede's. Inuyasha was through being gracious. He was irritated and wasn't afraid to let anyone know it. He received many sits from Kagome, but he couldn't help being annoyed at the lack of progress. The morning was cloudy and one fat raindrop hit his face as he made his way into Kaede's small hut. It had been raining ever since the incident as if the heavens themselves were crying over such a loss. Inuyasha pushed the straw door aside angrily. He flipped his head to the side to move the hair from his face. Kagome was kneeling next to the fire, warming her hands on the small flame. He stopped a moment to admire her beauty as the flame danced on her face, giving a warm orange glow to her complexion. He quickly averted his eyes as she looked up at him hopefully.
His eyes roamed the room before resting on Sango. She was where she always was. Her back was to him and she was lying on Kagome's sleeping bag on the floor. Her chestnut hair covered her face as she wallowed in self-pity and anger. Why wasn't the world satisfied? It had taken her entire family and now it took the only man she would even love. She contemplated this same though for the past two days. Nothing seemed to make any sense anymore. She looked over her shoulder at Inuyasha. She had the same hopeful look that Kagome did. Inuyasha sighed inwardly. 'Damn…'
He made his way across the room before settling against the wall across from Kagome. He felt the warmth from the flame warm his face as he leaned closer to the fire. It seemed to be trying to warm out the chill that had been in his bones ever since the incident. Both girls had their eyes locked on his. He looked back into Kagome's brown eyes. He could tell that she caught the emotion in his eyes. She always seemed to know exactly what emotions he was thinking. She had been around him long enough to tell when he was angry, when he was sad, when he was hiding something, and especially when he had just seen Kikyo.
Likewise, he could tell what she was feeling too, but not through her eyes. Her actions and little things that she did make it fairly obvious to him what was running through her mind and heart. If she was angry at him or upset over something, she would excuse herself and take a walk through the woods, no matter what time of day it was. If she was sad, she would refuse to meet his eyes and would sleep with her back away from wherever he was. If she was sad because of him, her eyes would sparkle, but in a different way than when they sparkled with excitement. If she was angry at someone other than him, she would grumble under her voice, but his sensitive hearing would usually catch what she said anyway. Whenever she was thinking deeply about something, she would toss and turn in her sleep a lot. She had been like that a lot lately. If she was completely pissed at him, he knew he could expect a couple of sits followed by: "I'm going home, stupid!"
Right now, she looked down and wouldn't meet his eyes anymore. She was sad. He looked over and Sango and started to speak. She rolled back towards the wall. Her mind reeled when she noticed the sad look on his face. The news that she didn't want to hear was about to come out of the half-demon's mouth. She closed her eyes and braced for the impact.
"I didn't find him." Inuyasha's voice held sadness for the first time in two days. Kagome met his eyes and he noticed her own eyes opened wide for a split second before she suppressed the shock at the tone of his voice. He had learned from their almost-year of adventures together that she almost immediately repressed emotions right after she felt them. This was true for everything except anger. Her sadness sometimes broke through too. 'Even with her being a stupid, fragile girl, I've only seen Kagome cry a few times. And it was never out of pain or fear. It was always because of me.'
Inuyasha let his mind wander and didn't notice immediately that Sango had gotten up for the first time since they had gotten back. She seemed unsteady on her feet, as if she had forgotten to walk. Inuyasha scoffed at her human weakness. 'She's acting as if without Miroku, she's forgotten about life. As if nothing is worth doing anymore. Stupid.' What would you do if Kagome died? He stopped himself as his conscious screamed the thought at him. Overwhelming sadness overwhelmed him as he thought about it. He realized he might feel the same as Sango.
'No. I wouldn't feel the same. I would feel much worse. And I definitely wouldn't live much longer. Kagome, I will follow you anywhere. Even in death.' He stared into her eyes, daring her to make eye contact. She was staring out the door after Sango. He could tell she was worried in the way that she was wringing her hands together. She then smoothed out her skirt. He knew what she was going to say next.
"I'm going after Sango." Yep. Exactly what he knew would come out. She always pulled down and flattened out that cloth of hers whenever she was about to get up. He stood up when she did.
"I'm coming with you." Kagome started to protest when Sango re-appeared in the door. Kirara was perched on her shoulder and she held Hiraikotsu on her back. Her eyes were red and puffy and her face was blotchy. Her hair was disheveled and she looked shaky.
"Sango…" Kagome half-whispered her best friend's name. Sango looked up and met Kagome's eyes. Before Sango spoke, Kagome nodded and returned to her spot on the floor. Inuyasha looked back and forth between the two, trying to catch the secret message. Sango retreated back out the door and Inuyasha sat across from Kagome once more.
"What the hell was that all about?" Inuyasha's voice came out harsher than he had intended. He cringed when he saw the look on Kagome's face. He gulped and was about to say something to take back what he said, but he was cut off.
"Inuyasha, SIT!"