With Claire on Lindsay duty Jill agreed to stay with Cindy. "Deja vu." Jill said with a small smile as she sat down on the edge of the bed.
A slight chuckle escaped Cindy before she reached out and took Jill's hand, "believe me this is one deja I'd rather not vu."
"Is that even a thing?" Jill laughed.
"Hey, cut me some slack. I was in a coma after all." Cindy was trying to keep the mood light but uttering the actual word made her nauseous.
After taking a moment to studying her, once again lucky to be alive, friend Jill decided to dive into the deep end. "So you think saving her life is a good way to win her over?"
"Not this again." Cindy responded with a deep sigh, clearly not looking forward to the coming conversation.
"Last time you stormed out on me. At least I know that won't happen this time."
"I could call the nurse and have you forcible removed." Cindy threatened half-heartily.
"Why won't you just tell her how you feel. You might be surprised by her response."
Cindy squeezed Jill's hand and looked at her friend intently "I do not want to date Lindsay."
"Worst.."
"Stop." Cindy cut her off. "I am not going to date her." she amended.
"Cindy," Jill began calmly. "she is my best friend, I know her better than anyone, other than Claire maybe. And I am telling you you're blind if you don't see it."
"Then I guess I'm blind. Look, maybe what you're seeing is just hero-worship. Because of the alley." Cindy really wanted to derail this conversation but Jill was persistent.
"I know what you're doing but I'm not as flappable as the good inspector." Jill laughed lightly.
"Maybe not, but you aren't quite up to Claire's level of unflappableness either." Cindy was trying to deal with this conversation with the one emotion she could handle at the moment, humor.
Cindy obviously didn't want to deal with this now and there was a part of Jill wanted to drop the whole thing. But she was convinced that she was right and the fact that she was once again sitting on Cindy's hospital bed made her that much more determined. "She hasn't left since you've been here."
"Actually she has. I made her go home last night to Pete, her boyfriend by the way."
"And she was back bright and early. She was barely gone."
"Long enough." Cindy whispered looking away.
Jill shook her head. "See. What was that?"
Caught in her jealousy Cindy reluctantly turned back to face Jill. "Okay, even if I am attracted it doesn't matter."
"Why not?"
"Did you not hear me mention Pete, the man in her life. Which by the way, I'm not."
"So, you're afraid she'll turn you down because you're a woman? I happen to know she's been attracted to women in the past." Jill revealed.
Cindy felt a flare of hope in that revelation, then it quickly turned to another stab of jealousy. "Did you two ever?"
"Would that bother you?" Jill asked with a smile. When she didn't get an answer she decided to put Cindy's mind at ease. "No, we never. That would never work." Jill paused for a second, torn between what she knew was best for her two friends and revealing Lindsay's secrets. "Lindsay doesn't like for her personal life to be on display, so I think that has kept her from ever pursuing a serious relationship with a woman. Men are easier and expected and they don't draw attention."
"So what makes you think she's ready now?" Cindy asked, still unconvinced.
"Well you are pretty hard to ignore."
Cindy contemplated what she was hearing. "If what you say is true then I'm even more convinced that I'm not right for her."
Jill watched the pain and disappointment that was clearly on her friend's face as she uttered the words and it finally hit her why Cindy was so reluctant. "Is that what this is all about? You don't think you're good enough?"
"I didn't say that, I said not right." Cindy clarified. "She is better off with Pete, he can give her what I can't."
"And just what is that?"
"Stability, a family, and she can keep her life under the radar where she likes it."
"Maybe," Jill appeared to mull over Cindy's argument, "but what about happiness and excitement."
"I think you give me too much credit." Cindy said with a sad smile.
"And I don't think you give yourself enough." Jill watched as Cindy's eyes filled with tears, "I also don't think Pete would jump in front of a car for her."
"I didn't either, just didn't move out of the way fast enough."
"No but you moved her fast enough."
Cindy finally let go of Jill's hand and turned toward the window. "You know I think I'm getting kinda tired."
"Cindy.."
"Why don't you go find the others, I'm gonna get some rest."
Slowly Jill stood up from the bed and moved toward the door. Before she left Cindy spoke again, "take Lindsay home with you." Jill started to respond but decided that she had pushed enough for one day.