Ron hated himself. He couldn't believe that he had so easily gotten caught up in this situation. He had barely spent twenty-four hours with her and he already couldn't control himself enough not to kiss her. It won't happen again, Ron thought to himself sternly. He knew that as much as he denied it there was still something there. He was irritated that he couldn't just let it go. Hermione was the only woman he had ever loved and seeing her again stirred up emotions he had tried to push aside. And then it hit him. He had never had a chance to get over Hermione. He had always pushed his feelings to the back of his mind where they lay dormant until a few months ago when she had shown up on his doorstep. The build up had exploded tonight when he had kissed her. God, it felt so good. Ron paced up and down his room, debating what he should do. He was torn. He wanted to hate her, to hold a grudge against her forever. She had broken his heart and just admitted that she didn't have to leave, she chose to. On the other hand, he wanted to forget anything had happened and just go back out into the hallway and kiss her senseless.

Ron looked down at his boxers where Hermione's hand had just been. He hadn't wanted to stop her. He had desperately wanted to let his body say all the things he couldn't say. Wouldn't say. Ron supposed that was why he had told her he hated her. Hermione had the ability to confuse him more than anyone he had ever met in his life. "It's not fair!" Ron exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "Why the hell does Hermione get to know what she wants? Why do I have to be the fucked up one? This is such bullshit! God damn it!" Ron knew it was psychotic to be yelling to himself but it was all he could do to keep sane.

Normally, he would talk to Harry but that was out of the question. First off, Ron didn't know how he could even get in contact with Harry. Not to mention Ron couldn't decide if he was more pissed at Hermione or Harry. They had both betrayed him but in completely different ways. Ron could barely keep his head above water. The two people who had always known him better than anyone else had deceived him, together. Together. Ron's mind imagined a scene where Hermione and Harry were sitting in Harry's office discussing how they were going to lie to him. They didn't think I could handle it. Ron felt ashamed, knowing that they were probably right. He knew that he never would have let Hermione go on that mission. He had cared to much about her to knowingly let her go off and cavort with the remaining Death Eaters. It was too dangerous, and if she got caught…

Ron realized how lucky Hermione was to be alive and walking right now. He figured her body must still be sore, as he could only imagine the torture they must have inflicted on her before Harry intervened or whatever had happened. Ron paused and thought for a moment and realized that he had no idea what had happened in the few hours leading to their arrival at the safe house. He was hesitant to even thinking about asking for any more answers. He had been burdened with so much information in the last twenty four hours he wasn't exactly sure how much more he could handle without having a mental breakdown. Who am I kidding? I'm already experiencing one. Ron thought to himself.

Ron sat on the edge of his bed, with his head in his hands remembering the night she had left two years ago.

Ron was running late, by about three hours. He apparated into his and Hermione's apartment and quickly set down his briefcase on the table as he looked at Hermione who was vigorously wiping down a counter. She was wearing one of his old maroon Weasley sweaters that was much too big for her and black pajama shorts. She looked fantastic. Where the sweater covered some of Ron's favorite parts of her body the shorts left little to the imagination, and gave him a fabulous view of her shapely legs. He stood admiring her for a moment before walking up slowly behind her and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm so sorry I'm late." He moved his lips to her neck sweetly, hoping he might be able to lessen her anger by kissing the spot that he knew that drove Hermione crazy.

"You should be." Hermione replied sadly, not turning around to face him. "I feel like I never see you anymore." She replied honestly.

"Hermione, I'm sorry. The department is really busy right now. I tried to come home as soon as I could." He wrapped his arms more tightly around her waist. "You know I'd rather be here with you."

"Yes I know. I just-" Hermione faltered.

"You just what?" Ron asked turning her around and looking at her in the eyes. "It's not like we don't have the rest of our lives to make up for those three hours."

"Right." Hermione uneasily. Ron had missed it at the time. She sighed and smiled. "Well how was it?" She reciprocated his gesture and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"What?"

"Work?" She raised her eyebrow at him.

"I don't really want to talk about work right now." Ron shook his head as he stared down at her body.

"Why? Did something happen?" Hermione asked a bit concerned.

"Yes. You chose to wear that." He pointed down at her.

"What?" Hermione asked looking down at herself obviously confused.

"You see when you wear those short shorts and my old sweater you look entirely too sexy and my mind can only think about one thing." Ron ran his hands up her sides suggestively.

"And what's that?" Hermione asked coyly, getting the hint.

"You know, I'm not very good with words how about I show you." Hermione didn't have a chance to respond as Ron had lifted her up and began carrying her to their bedroom. Once her feet touched the ground Ron pulled her into a deep, passionate kiss. He sucked on her bottom lip as his hand slid up her sweater, delighting in the fact that she was wearing nothing underneath. He began caressing her back when she pulled away and looked him in the eyes.

"You know I love you right?" Ron pulled back so he could get a better look at her.

"Of course. You know I love you right?"

"Yes." Hermione replied meekly.

"Is everything okay?" Ron asked curiously.

"Yes. It's just Ron, I need to tell you-" Hermione started.

"What?" Ron was becoming more and more concerned and it was apparent to Hermione.

"I'm just really happy with you." Hermione forced a smile.

"You about gave me a heart attack Hermione." Ron hugged her tightly.

"Sorry." She chuckled humorlessly. She reached up and touched his face and leaned in, kissing him aggressively, as though she suddenly needed him more than ever. She pulled him back onto the bed and…

Ron's mind stopped there. It had been the last time they had slept together. It was too painful to even imagine again. He immediately thought, she had tried to tell me. "Oh God." Ron said aloud rubbing his face. He leaned back and laid spread eagle on his bed unable to move. Literally, paralyzed by his thoughts. She had tried to tell me. The words ran like a marquee across his brains for the rest of the night. He was still angry but he did feel a little better knowing she had at least thought about it. Ron could not get a grip on anything. He was so overwhelmed at the moment he just prayed that sleep would come. He didn't care that it was daytime, he just wanted to succumb to the sweet nothingness of sleep.

Although he lay in bed tossing and turning for about another two hours, Ron finally fell asleep. When he woke up he looked at his watch seeing that it was around 4 a.m. He hadn't realized he was so tired. His stomach rumbled beneath him as he realized his diet for the past two days consisted solely of scotch. He rubbed his eyes, willing himself to forget the dream he had just had. It was of the night Hermione left, except no one was there to hit pause this time as things heated up. He groaned as he remembered the dream. He didn't want to think about anything that involved Hermione naked, with or without him.

He stood up, throwing on a sweater, much like the one Hermione had been wearing in the dream. He hoped that he didn't run into her. He couldn't handle seeing her at this particular moment. He walked cautiously to the kitchen, praying that somehow food had appeared out of thin air, because he knew there had been none before. When he reached the kitchen there was no sign of Hermione. He opened the cabinets slowly, peering around the edges. To his delight it was fully stocked. He looked around hoping to see the source of this glorious gift when Hermione appeared in the hallway. His face instantly fell. She was wearing exactly the same outfit as the dream and memory. She looked up embarrassed and tried to turn away.

"What the hell do you think your doing?" Ron yelled outraged. Hermione repeatedly opened and closed her mouth, not really sure how to answer that. "Where did you get that?"

"H-Harry brought some of my s-stuff by along with the food when you were asleep." She spluttered.

"Some of your stuff? Take it off!"

"Excuse me?"

"Take it off! NOW!" Ron didn't know why he was acting so insane but he couldn't help it. He couldn't stand to see her wearing that outfit, he wanted to run away but he knew he would look even more like a psychopath if he did that.

"No!" Hermione said frustrated.

"Hermione. That is my sweater. Take it off!"

"I won't!" Hermione had held onto the sweater for too long to give it up now. She had kept it hidden while she was away, transfiguring it. It had comforted her while she was gone. "It's mine now. You let me have it!" Ron growled in frustration. He stormed toward her as she backed away from him. She was backed up against a wall wishing she had brought her wand with her.

"One last chance." Ron breathed barely two feet away from her pointing a finger at it menacingly. Hermione shook her head, unable to get the words out. Ron raised his eyebrows and plunged. Hermione and Ron were suddenly engaged in a full out wrestling match. They fell to the floor legs and arms flailing Ron quickly over-powered her yanking the sweater over her head but instead of standing up he stared down at her, wearing nothing but her bra and the short shorts he used to love. He sucked in air at the sight of her underneath him and half naked, instinctively he ran his hand down her side. Her skin was soft under his rough and callused hands. Hermione closed her eyes for a brief moment enjoying his touch. Ron stroked for only a moment before he snapped back into reality. He was still pinning her down as he soon realized and jumped off the floor. His chest was heaving.

Hermione took a little time before she stood, crossing her arms over her chest. She wasn't scared, she wasn't mad, she was glad for the contact between her and Ron. Earlier he had left her breathless. She had ignored the 'hate' comment thinking he had really been pissed at himself for kissing her but it had still stung. Now she had no idea what to think. Yes you do. She thought to herself. She had worn that outfit for the exact reason that pissed Ron off but she hadn't expected him to react so intensely. Now they were standing awkwardly, staring into each others eyes. Neither of them was able to move.

"Just stay away from my stuff! Stay away from me!" Ron yelled suddenly. He picked the sweater up off the floor and stormed out of the room, once again. He knew it would be impossible for the two of them to stay away from one another. But, as much as he hated to admit it, it was going to be damn difficult to keep his mind, and hands, off of Hermione Granger.