And indeed she was. She hadn't even realized her face was wet with tears until now and that just made her even more upset. Ruby never cried. Never. And if she ever felt the need, she would never cry in front of someone. She couldn't control it now, though. They just kept falling. God damn it! She wrenched herself from the doctor s grip and ran a few feet farther down the hallway and into an empty bedroom.
Ruby slammed the door shut and the Doctor ran down the hallway. He stood in front of the door and was about to knock on the door when he suddenly felt horrible. He made her cry. He made Ruby cry. What did he say to do that to her? He sat down on the floor and adjusted him self so that his back was leaning on the door. He would just have to wait.
"Doctor?" Ruby braved that one single word out loud.
"Yeah, I'm right here." She heard his comforting voice from the hallway. Ruby was still getting over what had just happened so she left the door closed and just sat with her back to it.
"I'm sorry." She sighed; she was completely exhausted from crying. "I am so sorry. I just-"
"Needed some time alone?"
"Yeah. I mean sure you made me mad, but it wasn't your fault that I ran off."
Ruby heard the Doctor heave a large sigh and say, "I'm sorry too, Ruby."
"What are you sorry about? You didn't do anything."
"Well, I did make you cry."
Ruby thought for a moment and laughed.
"What are you laughing at me for?! It's not funny. I don't know what I did to make you cry, but I'm still apologizing and you're laughing at me!"
"Yes, I'm laughing at you." Ruby lightly shook her head. "Because you are such an arrogant prick. I wasn't crying because of you."
"You weren't?" the Doctor sounded completely relieved and at the same time perplexed.
"No. You didn't make me cry."
"Well, then why were you crying?"
She stopped and thought. She was crying because she was losing herself. She had lost control of her emotions and didn't know what to do. She had been Ruby Solange for 26 years and never had she been unaware of what she was going to do next. She was breaking down over some things and didn't even know why. And it was the worst when she was near the Doctor. He made it tough for her to think, to breathe, to walk.
"Imagine what it's like having all of your emotions bouncing around in your mind, in your grasp. Now imagine them bouncing around just out of arms reach, taunting you at the line of the fence that you can't cross. Let's just say that until yesterday, they were all contained and controlled for as long as I can remember."
There was a while there, where they had just stayed on either sides of the door. Every once in a while, Ruby would get up and walk around the room and sit down in one of the armchairs. The Doctor might get up and walk down the hallway and sit back down. While Ruby was sitting on the bed with her legs crossed beneath her dress, just staring at her hands for no reason, she heard the door handle twist down. In came the Doctor, and he only leaned on the dresser and looked at Ruby.
He was a bit curious that Ruby hadn't locked the door, but was distracted the moment he walked in the room. Ruby's mascara had run down her face and the bun in her hair was gone and it fell down and curled slightly around her shoulders. It even looked like she was pulling at her hair a bit. She was distraught and he wasn't sure if he should be next to her or not. He looked at her face again and saw her staring at him with those eyes that held so much mystery. But now all he could see in them was fright, and sadness. And maybe a touch of anger, but it all said one thing. She was alone.
Like him.
He quickly made his way over to the bed and sat down next to her. He didn't really know what to do so he just sat there. He watched her take a tissue from the nightstand and wipe off her mascara. She then flipped her head over and used her fingers to quickly comb through her hair. When she sat back up she looked up at him.
"You wanted to know why I was mad at you after the fact that you lied to me."
"Oh, Ruby. You don't have to-"
"No, you should know." She took a deep breath and exhaled it. "I knew that you lied to me, but I wasn't mad until I found out that you messed with my head with that stupid psychic paper. I felt like you had crawled into my head," into the one place where she could hide. "Like you had opened up a diary and used it against me."
The doctor fell into her eyes and felt her sincere fright that he had gone through her mind and found something. "Ruby, I didn't go through your head. In a way, the paper did. It finds something that you will believe and then displays it." Ruby seemed content with that explanation. "Do you want to go back downstairs? We could meet the princess."
Ruby's face went from blank to full of excited wonder. "Really? Wouldn't she have body guards or something?" She jumped up and almost ran out the door if it wasn't for the fact that she had one shoe on. She instantly tripped and miraculously fell into the armchair that she had sat in before.
The Doctor laughed at the sight of her sitting there in childish defeat. She even crossed her arms and pouted. "Aww! Poor Ruby." He smiled, and then said, "Maybe I can help."
Ruby watched as the Doctor knelt down in front of her and pulled her green shoe out of the inside of his coat pocket. She didn't bother asking. She knew it had to be timelord science. His hand gently held her foot as he slipped the on the shoe. "Would you look at that? A perfect fit. Cinderella would be jealous."
Ruby smiled as he helped her up. Yeah. Ruby doubted that Cinderella's prince charming was as handsome as the Doctor.
"Did we turn left or right, Doctor?"
"How should I know? You were the one who ran down here."
She gave him a small death glare. "Too soon Pluto."
The Doctor looked at Ruby curiously. "Pluto?"
"Yeah, I'm trying it on." Ruby watched the doctor roll his eyes slightly and look around at his surroundings. He looked left for a few seconds and then right. He then peeked through a few doors and came back with a confused expression on his face. "Are we lost?"
"No. We're not lost. I never get lost."
"Until now."
"No! I- I know where I am." He gripped his hair and scrunched his nose slightly. He then walked back and forth in a fast pace. "I just- We came from- What?!" Ruby was leaning on one leg and tapping her foot with her hand on her hip. She gave him a look that was somewhere between laughter and loving annoyance. She was amused by him.
"Oh, nothing." She didn't have to say what was on her mind.
"We are not lost. Soon enough you're going to have me asking directions from the next person to pass us."
Ruby rolled her eyes and said, "Did you open all of the doors?"
"Yes." The Doctor stopped pacing looked at Ruby. Her face had a mischievous look about it. He wasn't sure if that was good or not. "What's going through your head, Ruby?" She only smiled at the Doctor and started to walk down the hallway. "Stop. You don't even know where you're going."
"You're right. I don't." And yet she kept walking. "We're already lost, so what harm could be done by exploring a little. You can't say that you're not the least bit curious about the contents of this castle."