Title: I Hate 'What If?'
Fandom: Xiaolin Showdown
Characters: Rai, Kim
Prompt: 082:If?
Word Count: 484
Rating: PG
Summary: He keeps asking himself, what if he never left?
Author's Note: I'm pretty sure we all hate that question, I know I do.

I hate asking 'what if?' It's the one question that puts you down in every possible way. Like 'What if this happened?' or 'What if so and so were to occur?' or how about 'What if I never joined the Heylin side?'

Ever since I came back, I've always asked myself that question. Every time I did, it leads me into a dark place. One that holds resentment, rage, and most of all, loneliness.

I sat in my room, contemplating this possibility. I hate it but I can't help but think about it, a lot. Then I heard footsteps come in my direction. It can only be Omi.

"Penny for your thoughts?" That can't be Omi. I straightened up and looked in the direction from where it came and saw Kimiko's solemn face. "You look surprised."

"Sorry, I thought you were Omi," I said going back to my slump.

"Why would you think that?" she asked as she sat down beside me.

"You know Omi, he doesn't know when to mind his own business."

"That's true. Anyway, what's up with you?"

"Nothing."

"That's a lie." I let out a snort.

"You know me too well, Kim."

"So what's really on your mind?"

I turned to her.

"You really want to know?"

"I asked didn't I."

I considered it for a moment. Would she understand? I didn't know, but I do know that she's my best friend and I love talking to her.

"Fine, I was just wondering... What if I never joined the Heylin side? I mean I know I'd still be with you guys, but there's a part of me that's angry at you guys for moving ahead. I guess I just hate being left out and-"

"Rai, stop. I know what you mean."

I looked at her with stunned eyes.

"After you came back, I asked myself the same thing, and in the end, I know it's meant to be."

"How do you figure that?"

"Because, if you have never left and joined Wuya, then you'd probably find solace in your room a lot, all pent up with anger, and by the time we met Chase Young, you'd probably be tempted to join him and we both know that's twenty times worse."

"But that would mean I would've joined the Heylin side anyway."

"Well yeah, but it would've a lot worse than with Wuya. Think about it."

I did and she's right. I would've been a lot worse if I decided to work for Chase Young. Maybe even worse than what Omi went through because I would've been willing.

I smiled down at her.

"Thanks Kimiko."

As I was getting up, I planted a kiss on her cheek. She looked at me with shock and I saw her blush.

"W-What'd you do that for?" she stammered.

"Just because," I said as I walked out of my room and left her stunned.