Behind the Masques

Disclaimer: Don't own One Piece. Rayo Verrani owns Shidyk, Rayo, Nick, and Jinko. Crazy-Fishie owns the Masque Pirates.

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"Alright, move over, move over,"

"Dude, get off me!"

"Someone's hand is touching my butt!"

"Yo ho ho ho ho!"

SMACK!

"Brook, can't you keep your hands to yourse-YAH!"

"Hehehe...nice suit, Nami,"

"Very nice,"

SMACK! SMACK!

"Yo ho ho ho ho! Azu and Axe got bitch slapped,"

Devon shook his head as he, his crew and the others took their seats in a large amphitheater that sat at one end of the island. After hearing that a show was going to be performed, Dusty started bouncing around, annoying the others until finally, they gave in. Actually, Jinko wanted to watch the show too and well...here everyone was.

"Hey look!" Brook nodded to the stage as he massaged his jaw, "I think it's starting!"

Everyone, from both crews and the rest of the audience, became silent as the stage lit up and two people walked out on stage. Dusty squinted, looking right at one of them.

"Guys...that's Kagura!"

Shidyk leaned forward, "She's here? Man, everyone's being drawn to this place, huh?"

"Seems like it," Dusty flicked him on the head, "Hush now,"

"Hey-,"

"Hush!"

"I'm gonna-,"

"Hush or I'll grab the Flash Dials,"

Shidyk bit his tongue and turned to the stage, I'm so kickin' her ass...damn fox.

Veda D. Kagura and her companion Hoko, waved and bowed at everyone in the theater. Hoko wore a heavy black cloak, shield and gloves while Kagura wore a very...colorful outfit. It greatly resembled a jester's outfit, complete with colorful pants, curved shoes, and bells on tassles. On one of her hands, she had a miniature version of herself in the form of a hand puppet.

"Welcome, visitors and citizens of Samhain Island!" Kagura said loudly, waving at them again, "We hope that you'll enjoy the lovely show we have prepared for you all this evening! Tonight, we give you a feast for your eyes with acts of bravery, strength and skill!"

Hoko nodded, "That's right, Kagura-chan," he turned to her and looked her over, "What happened, you rob a dead clown?"

Kagura glared at him while the audience laughed, "Yeah, by the way, your mom says hi,"

Again, the audience laughed while Hoko's jaw practically hit the floor.

"Oh, burn!" Kagura made the small puppet say, raising it to his face, "Watcha gonna do now, loverboy?"

Hoko went silent, his eye twitching, "I hate that puppet,"

"You hate me, but you luuuuuuuurv Kagura-chan!" the puppet laughed, clapping it's hands.

"I'm not having this conversation,"

"Yes you are!" the puppet nodded rapidly, "You're having a conversation with a wee little puppetman!"

"You're not a man,"

The puppet looked at him, then at Kagura, who nodded.

"He's got a point,"

"Damn," the puppet scratched it's head, "Well, still, stop talking to dolls, loverboy,"

Kagura nudged Hoko, lowered the puppet and faced the large crowd again, "First off, everybody, while the rest of our group prepares, let us entertain you with the amazing strength of Kameki!"

Everyone in the crowd clapped along with Hoko and Kagura as the latter left the stage and a very large woman, who stood about eight and a half feet tall with dark skin, walked on stage. She wore camouflage cargo pants, heavy black boots, a tattered combat vest, and on her right arm was a large object...one that looked alot like a gatling gun.

"Who here thinks that they have what it takes to match my strength?" she challenged, holding up her left arm, "I have giant blood running through my veins...who thinks they can beat me?"

Almost immediately, Shidyk, Rayo, Jinko, Franky, Zolo, Luffy, Ace, Devon, and Axe shot to their feet.

"OI!" they shouted at the same time, "OVER HERE!"

Kameki sweatdropped while most of the crowd was filled with chuckles. She waved idly at them, "Alright, it seems I have a few volunteers...," she raised her hand and went back and forth, looking each of them over for a few moments before landing on one of them, "You, big guy in the red underwear! C'mon down!"

"SUPA!" Franky pushed off against the seat and practically flew onto the stage. As soon as he landed, he struck his super pose for the crowd.

Kameki grinned and shook her head, "Seems like we got ourselves someone who loves the spotlight. What's your name, big guy?"

"Franky! No...wait, scratch that," Franky lifted his sunglasses and pointed proudly to his emblem on his chest, "SUPA-FRANKY!"

In the crowd, Azu shook his head, "Oy very...,"

"Alright, Supa-Franky," Kameki cracked her neck as Kagura and Hoko carried a large table onto the stage, "You think you can match my strength?"

Franky nodded and took a seat, planting his large arm onto the table, "Question should be can you match mine?"

Kameki planted her own arm on the table and grasped Franky's large hand, "Well, that's what we're here to find out, eh? On three. One...two...three!"

The two of them put power behind their arms and everyone in the crowd was cheering for one or the other. Luffy and Usopp screamed their lungs out cheering for Franky while Rayo chuckled, shaking his head.

"That reminds me of the past,"

Shidyk nodded, "Yeah,"

"You two talking about me?" Axe's foam gator head appeared between them, "Huh?"

Rayo and Shidyk looked at each other, nodded, and pushed Axe away, "GET LOST, KID!"

Axe yelped and fell over onto his back thanks to the push. He tried to pick himself up, but found himself rolling from side to side, stuck on his back.

"Guys...I can't get up!" the treasure hunter waved his stubby foam arms, "I've fallen and I can't get up!"

Rayo looked down at him, "Are you serious?"

"Yes!" Axe stopped for a breather, "The costume's bulkiness is stopping me from getting up! I can't do anything,"

"...is that so?" Rayo glanced at Shidyk, who already had a smile on his face.

Axe looked back and forth between the two, "Uh-oh...,"

"Everyone, if you'll excuse us," Shidyk rose to his feet, grabbed Axe's costume by the gator head and dragged him away, Rayo taking up the rear while Axe screamed in protest.

Niri shook her head as Kameki's and Franky's arm wrestling contest was over, "Great, I missed it! Dammit, Axe,"

"Thank you, Kameki and thank you Supa-Franky," Kagura cheered as the rest of Kameki's warm-up act finished, "Thank you. Now, for those of you out there, who are thinking of leaving for a snack break, don't! We have prepared lots of delicious food for you all, so if you could just wait for our friend...," she stopped and peered out at the crowd, "Speak of the devil! Everyone," she nodded to a young woman in a pink dress and red vest in the crowd, her long blonde hair covering one side of her face, "...meet Mary Jizabel, she will be going around the crowd selling snacks to you all as the show goes on,"

-Meanwhile...with Rayo, Axe, and Shidyk-

"How much longer you think we can keep doing this before we're bored of it?"

"I dunno...how much has this kid annoyed us to no end?"

"Good point,"

Rayo let Axe fall onto his back on the dark ground, "I'm surprised he hasn't thrown up yet,"

"I'm surprised we found a hill rocky and big enough to screw with Axe," Shidyk murmured, looking at the steep, boulder-encrusted hillside that was illuminated by the moonlight.

Axe groaned as he held his head, "Not again...,"

"Too bad," Rayo kicked Axe in the side and soon, the treasure hunter screamed as he not only rolled down the hill, but collided into the rocks below and bounced off them.

"For a guy with a big bounty and a fearless attitude in a fight, he's kind of a wimp in his offtime, ain't he?"

"Yeah. That's just sad,"

-Back at the theater-

Kagura watched as her friend Zayne, who was dressed very similar to Hoko's fashion of costume, finished up his animal act with Raffles, their St. Bernard. She tapped her foot impatiently behind the curtain, "This isn't getting as much good mojo as I hoped...I just hope Mary's scoring some good money with her food,"

Hoko nodded, "Ya ask me, the animal act's kinda blah. Things will definitely pick up once Eric starts,"

"Speaking of," Kagura nodded to Eric, who was now walking on stage, dressed in a fine suit and wearing a white half-mask over his face, "There he goes...could've waited for the intro,"

"Eh, don't worry about it,"

Eric bowed deeply to the crowd, "Greetings, faithful audience! I am Eric, a humble musician. But, not only am I a musician, but I am skilled in the nearly forgotten art of hypnotism-,"

"IT'S JANGO!" Straw Hat shouted, earning a whop upside the head from Nami.

"BAKA!"

Eric cleared his throat, "I've seen to cause a stir with mention of my other talent, so let's start with that, shall we?" he looked through the crowd, "I will need two volunteers...," he pointed to Nami and Aro, "Young ladies, would you join me?"

Sanji shot to his feet, "Messing with Nami-san's mind...!"

Brook pulled him down and leaned close, "If this guy's good, he can make Nami think and do anything...,"

Sanji became silent and soon, a lecherous look crossed his face, followed by a smile, "Nami-san...,"

Brook nodded, "Glad you understand!"

Eric walked back and forth, looking at Aro and Nami, "It seems these two ladies have a theme in their costumes...,"

Nami shrugged, "I doubt it...I'm a famous cat burglar," she gave a flirting wink at him, "Never heard of the Black Cat?"

"Heh...," Eric clicked his tongue and held up a gold watch, "Now, what I want you both to do is look straight at this watch...never look away from it," he began to swing it from to side and for a long moment, the two girls' eyes followed it, "Now...when I count to three, you two will do anything that I or anyone else will suggest," he glanced over his shoulder, "Nothing too adult!" he warned.

Brook moaned and leaned back into the chair. Robin couldn't help but chuckle...knowing Brook, he'd ask Nami and Aro to show him their panties, something they wouldn't do in real life.

Once Eric counted to three, Aro's and Nami's eyes seemed to lose their luster and they just stood there silently.

"Alright, any suggestions?" Eric asked, turning to the crowd again, "I'll say again, nothing over the line,"

"SHOW ME YOUR-,"

BONK!

"BAKA SKELETON! HE JUST SAID NOTHING LIKE THAT!"

"Damn, Niri, go nuts on the guy why don't ya,"

Azu shot up, a large smile on his face, "CATFIGHT!"

Almost instantly, Aro and Nami looked at each other, then pounced on one another. They fell to the stage floor, tugging and clawing at themselves as they rolled around.

"Catgirl in skimpy shorts and Nami in a tight catsuit," Azu looked around, "WHERE THE HELL ARE BINOCULARS WHEN YOU NEED THEM!?"

Backstage, Kagura lightly beat her head against the wall, "I never should've let him do his hypnotist stuff...there's always at least one pervert out there,"

Hoko shook his head, "Well, at least nothing else can go wrong,"

"Don't say that,"

"Why not?"

Before Kagura could answer, their friend Isaac, who was dressed in black pants, a button-up shirt with askew tie and square glasses walked up to them.

"Guys, we got a problem,"

Kagura glared at Hoko, who looked away, whistling innocently.

Sighing, the botanist turned to the doctor, "What's up?"

Isaac jerked a thumb to where the others were, "Uhm...it's Taeko,"

"What about him?"

Kagura followed Isaac further backstage to find Taeko laying on a makeshift couch, wearing red robes, a wig of shocking white hair and a strange golden ring around his neck. His head and face were covered with lumps.

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!"

Isaac rubbed his temple, "He made the mistake of trying to steal from The Beast while on break,"

Kagura's eye twitched, "Someone out there hates me...," she turned to Isaac, "Guess you'll need to work with Noir in her act,"

As if on cue, the ninja of their group appeared, clad entirely in leather, wearing a large hat on her head.

"If I help her act, that means I gotta do two acts," Isaac reasoned, "Don't know if I have the energy to do that and my knife throwing act,"

Kagura covered her face and shook her head, "Someone really hates me. I-," she stopped and went silent for a few moments before lifting her head, a small grin on her face, "I'm a friggin' genius!"

The two of them watched her run off, leaving a dirt trail in the air of her wake.

Isaac turned to Noir, "I hate it when she says she's a genius,"

Noir could only shrug.

-----

"You guys are asses,"

"Aw, c'mon...you've messed with us all the time, it's only fair to get you back,"

"By making me a pinata,"

"Hey, rope and stick were right there,"

"By rolling me down a hill...,"

"You flew when you hit those rocks,"

"THEN you spun me around until I almost threw up,"

"What's your point, kid?"

"The point is you both can go straight to hell!" Axe huffed, adjusting his gator head, "Honestly, you guys-," he stopped walking and looked to the side, "Guys, check it out!"

Shidyk and Rayo came to a stop and looked in the direction where Axe was looking. Off in the distance was a large house, covered in vines. In one corner of the house, a light shined through the window.

"I thought everyone on the island was at the festival?" Rayo took out a piece of pocky and began chewing on it, "Guess they left the lights on,"

"Eeeeh...wrong!"

All three men turned to see Kairi Lumina and Toby Dicey standing under a large oak tree a short distance away.

"Great," Axe slumped, "What do you guys want?"

"Aw, don't worry, we're here to play nice," Toby grinned and nodded to the house, "But, like I said, you guys are wrong. Everyone else is at the festival. Besides, even if they weren't, there shouldn't be a light on in the house,"

"How the hell do you know?"

Kairi blew a strand of hair out of her eyes, "Because, we've been here longer than you three...we've taken in the stories," she glanced at the house, "That place is supposed to have good and evil things in there...but in recent years, it's mostly evil,"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

The Blood Countess chuckled, "You really wanna know?"

-----

"Isaac, it's fine,"

Isaac shook his head as he stayed as far away from Dusty, Niri and Pingu, his eyes staring straight at the bird, "Heeeeeeeeeeell no!"

"What's wrong with him?" Niri picked up Pingu and hugged him close.

Kagura held up the puppet of herself again.

"Doc is scared of birdies," the puppet said, pointing to Pingu, "So, he tries to avoid them,"

"Just keep it away from me," Isaac looked at Niri, "Please, I just-" he stopped and noticed that Pingu was suddenly missing, "Where the hell is the bird?!"

A soft honking sound and pressure around his body made him look down to see Pingu giving him a small hug around his waist. Letting out a bloodcurdling scream, Isaac ran off like a gunshot. Kagura's puppet waved at him furiously.

"RUN BOY RUN!"

Kagura rolled her eyes and turned to Dusty, "Anyway, that's our problem. Think you can help?"

Dusty nodded, a huge grin on her face, "I'D LOVE TO!"

"Thank every friggin' god out there," Kagura sighed in relief, "We just may save the show yet,"

"Guys, where's Pingu?"

Everyone looked around the room to see that Pingu was no longer with them. Before they could call out his name, another bloodcurdling scream filled the air and they knew exactly where he was.

"Isaac's got problems," Kagura muttered.

The puppet nodded, "Yeppers,"

-Short time later-

"Ladies, gentlemen, and everything else in between!" Kagura walked briskly across the stage, "We have a special treat for you all! Due to unforseen injuries, one of our is unable to perform. However, as a treat, we have a special guest taking his place. Everyone, from the Grand Line, formerly of the Foxy Pirates, now an Axe-Head Pirate...," she spun around and waved to the curtain behind her, "DUSTY WENATA!"

Cheers, and one very loud one from DJ, ripped through the audience as Dusty walked out on stage, a large smile on her face. She bowed deeply, "It's an honor to be here, everyone. Long have I wanted to display my talents, my illusions, my gift and my skill among a curious crowd such as yourselves. For years, I have practiced and practiced, trying to be great so that wherever I go, people would know my name not by my wanted poster but by my skill as an entertainer,"

"SHOW US YOUR PANTIES!"

"ERO-SKELETON! DUSTY-CHAN DON'T DO IT!"

Dusty sweatdropped, but ignored DJ and Brook, "Let's begin, shall we?"

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Axe: Hey, everyone, what's up? Listen, uh...this chapter kinda wore out Kilnorc. He has been under pressure for this chapter due to the oncoming holiday and he wants to get it finished by then. He tried with this chapter, and with his best judgement and his mind being all racked for stuff now...he did what he thought was best. -points to Kilnorc, whose laying on couch, a smoking keyboard nearby- see, bad shape. Anyhoo, I'm sure he'll be up and ready to go again with the next chapter soon. Later ya'll!