DISCLAIMER: I don't really know how many of these disclaimers I have to do but whatever keeps me on this site (shrug). In any case I do not own Beth or Jo or Marmee or Amy or Meg or even Laurie (though I do in my head . We're dancing right now so read the chapter and let us be...)
Chapter 28
TENDER TROUBLES
(revised pg. 170)
"Hum!" said Jo, still carefully watching her sister's face, for the blush on her cheeks had already left, the smile gone, and a tear left on the window ledge. Beth brushed it off and took a quick, wary glance at Jo, but she was intent on working at her latest "Olympia's Oath". But as soon as Beth turned, Jo's attention was on her again, and she saw Beth's hand brush more than one tear away with a quiet sadness in her eyes and the contours of her face. Eventually Beth recognized the pain as being too evident, and so quietly slipped away. Jo tried to figure out what had caused this odd behavior as she went into her room. Beth had just been sitting there when Laurie had walked by...
"Mercy on me, Beth loves Laurie!" Jo said with a start. Jo's mind swirled with emotions. Shock was clearly there, as well as something else. A very queer feeling Jo could not place. Jealousy? But the thought was so silly Jo dismissed it at once. "Well Laurie will love her back! What's not to love? And if he doesn't he'll be sorry. I'll see to it." Said Jo confidently and she glowered threateningly at Laurie's picture hanging on the wall.
Laurie tended to flirt with many girls of whom Meg and even Amy were included. He didn't dare do so with Jo for he knew he would receive multiple blows if he tried, and so he only joked with her. But with Beth it was different. He was always courteous and kind to her and treated her with nothing but respect. But this was not suspicious behavior for everyone treated sweet little Beth in this manner. No one would expect he had feelings for her.
When Laurie first started college, he "fell in love" quite frequently (about once a month). But these small affairs were so numerous and so quickly extinguished, they did nothing but amuse Jo, who couldn't help but think Laurie's philanderous ways (though she knew wrong to encourage) were somewhat humorous. But suddenly Laurie had stopped chasing girls, and started hinting at an "all-absorbing passion". This drove Jo mad with curiosity but he avoided the sensitive subject completely.
These were the state of things when Jo made her great discovery. That night she watched him intently (though secretively).
Nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary: Beth was her usual quiet, polite, pleasant self and Laurie was nice and behaved. But having discovered this new romance, Jo's fantasies ran away with her. As usual, Laurie sat in a rocking chair close by Beth, entertaining her with bits of gossip, while Beth sat comfortably on the couch, hands folded in front of her, a smile of interest on her face. But to Jo things were quite a different story. Jo thought that Beth's eyes rested on Laurie's dark face with strange pleasure, and that she seemed a bit too interested in Laurie's telling of a cricket match. Also, she fancied that she saw Laurie's demeanor toward Beth grow with tenderness. Every once in awhile the strange pang throbbed within Jo, but she was determined to beat it down.
"She will make quite an angel of him, and he will make life delightfully easy and pleasant for the dear, if they love each other." She said to herself. Although she had to admit Beth had a very gentle spirit whilst Laurie's was so wild and free. Jo thought that Laurie's spirit would most likely be tamed under Beth's influence, and that made Jo a little sad, for she loved Laurie's funny, insane character. True he was a bit childish but that's what made him so fun to be around. And when it came right down to it he was a smart and kind lad and Jo loved him just the way he was.
Jo was still pondering on these things as she sat down on the old sofa. The sofa was a shabby old thing but all the girls loved it, for it was their refuge. One corner had always been Jo's favorite. Among the mountain of pillows was a particular round, hard one, covered with a knobby button at each end. This was known as "Jo's Pillow" and was not to be touched. To her it could be a weapon, a barricade, or a deterrent of keeping a nap from turning into a hard-awakened slumber.
Laurie knew this pillow and it's purposes all too well and had caused to form a deep dislike of it, as he had been unmercifully pummeled with it before and occasionally blocked from being in the seat he most treasured - next to Jo. If it stood on the end it was a sign that he might proceed, but if it lay flat upon the sofa, woe to the person who dared disturb it! At that moment Jo had forgotten to bar her corner and had not been in her corner five minutes before Laurie's massive form suddenly sank into the cushions, his long legs stretched before him and arms sprawled along the back of the couch.
Jo smashed down the pillow down but to no avail. There was not room for it, and so it crashed to the floor.
"Come, Jo, don't be thorny. Do you hate your boy and want to fire pillows at him?"
"How many bouquets have you sent Miss Randal this week?" Jo asked, instantly turning to the next subject on her mind.
"Not one, upon my word. She's engaged. Now then."
"I'm glad of it. That's one of your extravagances, sending flowers to girls for whom you don't care two pins," continued Jo in a lecturing tone.
"Sensible girls for whom I do care whole papers of pins won't let me send them flowers, so what can I do?"
"Mother doesn't approve of flirting, even in fun, and you do flirt desperately, Teddy."
"I'd give anything if I could answer 'So do you'. As I can't, I'll merely say that I don't see any harm if all parties understand it's play. Besides, it holds a higher purpose."
"Higher purpose? And what would that be?" said Jo inquiringly.
"To make a certain girl jealous." Said Laurie, looking straight at Jo with his deep brown eyes.
For a moment Jo's heart skipped a beat. But before she could let the odd little blush she felt creep into her face she remembered Beth. Beth was – of course – his all-consuming passion and true love. She went back to an earlier subject.
"Well, flirting does look pleasant but I can't learn how it's done."
"I'm glad you can't flirt. It's really refreshing to see a sensible, straightforward girl who can be jolly and kind without making a fool of herself. We fellows don't like flirts though we may act as if we did sometimes. The pretty modest girls are never talked about except respectfully among gentlemen."
For some reason Jo felt a sense of relief. Jo frowned at the fact these queer feelings continued to bounce in at any given moment. It was like she had no control of her senses at all.
Returning suddenly to her admonitory tone (and with Beth in mind), she said lowering her voice, "Teddy, devote yourself to one of the pretty modest girls whom you do respect."
"You really advise it?" and Laurie looked at her with an odd look of hope on his face.
Did she? Jo blinked. What an odd thought, of course she did! "Yes I do." she said. The old, lecturing tone returned, "But you'd better wait till you are through college, and be fitting yourself for the place meantime. You're not half good enough for – well, whoever the modest girl may be," and Jo blushed, for Beth's name had almost escaped her.
"You're probably right." Said Laurie with a sigh and an expression of humility. He dropped his eyes.
Jo couldn't help but smile at this softer side of Laurie that came only so often. But the moment was a little too strained for her liking so she said, "Go and sing to me. I'm dying for some music and always like yours."
Laurie started into "Up with the bonnets of Dundee", but Jo's lids were heavy, and so she went to say a goodnight to Laurie and escape to her bedroom.
Though she was tired, Jo lay long awake that night, and was just dropping off into slumberland when the sound of a stifled sob made her bolt upright and race to Beth's bedside.
"What is it, dear?" she asked anxiously.
"I thought you were asleep," Beth sniffled.
"Is it the old pain, my precious?"
"No, it's the new one but I can bear it," and Beth as she tried to hide her tears.
"Tell me all about it, and let me cure it as I often did the other."
"You can't. There is no cure." The utter lack of hope in Beth's voice frightened Jo tremendously.
"Where is it? Shall I call Mother?"
"No, no, don't call her, don't tell her. I shall be better soon. Lie down here and 'poor' my head. I'll be quiet and go to sleep."
Jo obeyed, but as she softly brushed Beth's hot forehead and caressed her tear-stained face, she asked, "Does anything trouble you, dearie?"
"Yes Jo," replied Beth after a long break.
"Wouldn't it comfort you to tell me what it is?"
"Not now. Not yet."
"Then I won't ask, but remember, Bethy, that Mother and Jo are always glad to hear and help you if they can."
"I know it. I'll tell you by-and-by."
Holding each other tenderly, they fell asleep. Jo's last thought was that Laurie would love her sister. No matter what it took Jo would she her Bethy happy again.