DISCLAIMER: I don't own Jo or Beth or Marmee, Hannah, Amy, Meg, John, Laurie...am I forgetting someone? Gosh writing this fan fic makes me want to start saying "Christopher Columbus!" and burst into "Astonishing" from the musical (One more chapter after this one - don't stop now!)

Chapter 37

BETH'S SECRET

Jo could not stop smiling. Life was like a dreamland to her. Now she understood why Meg acted so silly around John, for she could not help but act silly herself.

"There!" she cried triumphantly, putting down her pen as she had finally finished the book that had taken so long to write (her previously gloomy spirit being responsible).

"Oh, Jo, you finished your book? I am glad." said Beth, who had quietly entered the room without Jo's knowing.

"I knew you, would, Jo. You always - " but right then Beth burst into a fit of coughing.

"Beth, darling, are you allright?" said Jo concernedly.

"I'll be f - " but Beth broke into another barrage of coughing that made her whole frame shudder violently.

"Why Beth you're sick!" said Jo.

When Beth's fit died down she said with great weariness, "Well, I guess the truth is out now. No point in trying to hide."

Jo looked to her questioningly, "What do you mean by that, lamb?"

Beth took a deep breath, but began coughing again. Jo went to fetch some water. Soon Beth was able to speak again.

"I've known that I was terribly ill for a long time now, Jo. But I didn't want to tell you because it would only make things worse, and there was nothing you could do for me anyhow. It would only break your heart."

And Jo recalled the passage in Beth's diary, I don't know how I shall ever tell Jo. It will break her heart if I do...

"I am dying." said Beth. Only three words, but three words that brought Jo's world crashing down.

"Beth, you... you can't." said Jo, still stunned from the impact of her words.

"It's true, Jo. When Laurie came he saw me and knew at once. He got it out of me, but I made him swear not to tell you or Marmee and Father."

And then yet another memory came to Jo's mind, Laurie holding Beth and saying "I can't live without you."

Because who could live without Beth?

And Jo suddenly saw the difference she could not see before: how pale Beth was, the sunken look in Beth's tired eyes, the frailty and thinness of Beth's figure.

"Oh, Beth!" cried Jo, grabbing onto her sister with complete despair.

Jo felt Beth shudder with more coughs.

Jo began to cry then.

"Hush, dear. Everything will be allright." said Beth, soothingly, although she was the one who would soon leave them all.

But it wouldn't be allright, for little Bethy would be gone.

...

For the next several weeks Beth was treated as queen. She was surrounded with the best things and by those who loved her most. Meg and John came over with the twins so Beth could play with them. Jo read all of Beth's favorite stories to her, Laurie played endless amounts of tunes (including Jo's Melody, which Beth found beautiful and earned him a kiss from Jo). Mr. Lawrence smothered her room in flowers and chocolates and pretty things, Mr. March told her tales of the war (but not the sad ones of course). Marmee and Hannah made the most delicious meals fit for royalty. Even Amy came back to see her. Of course everyone soon found out about Alrick and Beth was the first to hear of the romantic affair, which delighted her to no end.

"I am the happiest girl in all the world." said Beth, beaming while cuddling up to her dear cats.

But time was short, and Beth grew sicklier with each passing day.

Then one night as Jo was sleeping, Beth called out to her.

"Yes, Beth, what is it?" said Jo tenderly, coming to her beloved sister's bedside.

"I only want to let you know..." Beth's forehead wrinkled in the pain of talking "..that I love you more than anything. And as everyone has gone away, you have always been here. You have never left me. And I am grateful." she smiled weakly at Jo.

"Oh, Beth I could never leave you." said Jo, putting Beth's hand to her cheek and kissing it.

"But I shall soon be leaving you. I am so sorry." said Beth with the look of a sinner begging to be forgiven.

"No, no, Bethy, dear. Do not be sorry for it is not your fault. I am the one who must be forgiven, for I have been a horrid wretch to envy you when I should have only ever loved you."

"I will always forgive you, Jo." said Beth with a look of pure, unadulterated love for her sister.

"I know, dear. That is why you have to go: God misses you so much, he is unable to bear your staying here any longer."

"I don't want to leave." said Beth with sadness.

"It's allright, Beth. Think of what heaven will be like."

"Tell me, Jo. Talk to me until I fall asleep." said Beth.

And so Jo told Beth of what she thought heaven would be like. She described clouds whiter than snow, of brilliant sunshine and soft meadows. Of being surrounded by lovely angels, who sang to her all of the time. She talked well into the night, until Beth's figure had grown still. But, Jo realized, she was not asleep.

She was gone.

"Oh, Bethy." she whispered, and held her sister's frail little body close, her tears falling onto the still, peaceful face.

A face that still held a shy, gentle smile.

A smile that Jo loved.

A smile that she would never see again.