I had enough of angst for a while so here's an update to the humourous fic which is OMG 3 years in the making.
You've Got Mail: Chapter 2
To : Tsukushi Makino
From: Tsukasa Doumyouji
Subject: I'm going to make you
REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET
REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRETREGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET
Tsukushi massaged her temples, an all-too familiar scene which happened every morning. Well, technically every morning since the F4 crash landed into her world. Oh wait, this world did not belong to her. It belonged to Doumyouji. Fine, what unbelievably asshole thinking to do in the morning. Too bad Yuki was away on a business trip with Tsubaki this week. She sorely needed to vent her extreme frustrations.
She cursed under her breath as she began to delete the last of Tsukasa's emails. The young man had decided to spam her account, with the same message repeating itself like a broken record. Either way, she knew that when she saw him later in the day, somebody was going to get hurt real badly. She picked up the phone and punched in the number furiously.
"Welcome to the Doumyouji Helpdesk. Please press 1 to speak to an operator, 2 for enquiries on unlocking your password…."
"1." She said tersely and waited forever for the operator to come on line. Finally, she heard a click and heard a lazy drawl on the other end.
"Doumyouji Helpdesk, how may I help you beautiful lady?" Tsukushi frowned when she heard that voice. It was oddly familiar, like she had heard it somewhere before. A sudden realization hit her as she glanced at the timetable she had drawn up for the F4. She rolled her eyes.
"Nishikado-san?"
"Oh!" The voice at the other end started to sound more enthusiastic. "Makino darling, is that you? Gosh, what are you doing, calling us? Checking up on me? You never replied my email for last Friday evening about drinks! Ah, you made me wait in vain…"
"Nishikado, are you the only one manning the desk?"
"Well, the rest are here although Rui's asleep and Tsukasa nearly punched the other person on another line if he could have. Akira seems to be engaging in… oh you don't need to know but we're good. Will you come down to see us?"
Tsukushi groaned inwardly. Whatever was she thinking, sending them to answer phonecalls at the helpdesk? Heaven save her, she was turning retarded.
"Er, I might. Anyway, make yourself useful. I need assistance with my email account. I would like to block someone."
"Anything for you, Makino." She swore she could see him wink at that. "Sounds serious though? And who exactly would you like to block?"
"Ok, I'll spell this out for you."
"D"
"D"
"O"
"O"
"NISHIKADO. You don't need to repeat after me!" She screamed into the phone, calming down a little when she remembered that he was after all, inexperienced.
"Ah, my bad. As you were saying…?"
"D-O-U-M-Y-O-U-J-I-T-S-U-K-A-S-A-A-T-D-O-U-M-Y-O-U-J-I-D-O-T-C-O-M" She heard the guy type furiously into the logging computer.
"I got that Makino. Doumyouji… wait Makino dear, you want to block Tsukasa?"
"Will you keep your voice down Nishikado?! I don't want that idiot to hear that!"
"I'm talking to you over the phone now. Just lower your phone volume if I'm too loud. But Makino, are you sure?"
"That crazy idiot just spammed my email with 1000 messages! He's psycho!"
"Tsukasa's a real pain in the ass sometimes but...Oh hey Tsukasa! Don't!"
"YOU BITCH. YOU WANT TO GET RID OF ME BY BLOCKING ME?! NEVER!!"
"Tsukasa! OUCH! Akira!"
"What Jiro?! Tsukasa STOP THAT MESSING AROUND WITH THE PHONE."
"You guys are way too noisy."
"GIVE ME THE DAMN PHONE I WANT TO SCOLD THAT WOMAN AND TELL HER…" Tsukushi heard scuffling in the background, with more curses thrown around and an occasional yelp of pain here and there. Finally, all seemed to have gone silent.
"Hello?" She asked cautiously.
"Makino." A dead voice came over the line.
"Oh, Hanazawa Rui! What happened to them?"
"They'll be fine. Thank you for calling the helpdesk. I just logged your request in. Have a good day." The phone clicked and went dead. Tsukushi put the phone back on the hook and groaned loudly. It was only Monday and things were already getting way too intense for her.
To : Tsubaki Doumyouji
From: Tsukushi Makino
Subject: I want to die
Right now. Tsubaki, your brother keeps spamming me, Akira and Soujiro keep flirting with all the female staff and that Rui guy just spaces out in every corner. Help me, please. Tell them to go away. Send them away!!
To : Tsukushi Makino
From: Tsubaki Doumyouji
Subject: Out of Office Reply
Hi! I'm not in the office at the moment! My access to emails are limited but I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can!
To : Tsubaki Doumyouji
From: Tsukushi Makino
Subject: I want to die
NOW! TSUBAKI YOUR BRATS ARE CREATING HELL!!
To : Tsukushi Makino
From: Tsubaki Doumyouji
Subject: Out of Office Reply
Hi! I'm not in the office at the moment! My access to emails are limited but I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can!
To : Tsubaki Doumyouji
From: Tsukushi Makino
Subject: ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH
ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
To : Tsukushi Makino
From: Tsubaki Doumyouji
Subject: Out of Office Reply
Hi! I'm not in the office at the moment! My access to emails are limited but I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can!
Throughout the entire day, Tsukushi's phone kept ringing off the hook. The IT helpdesk decided that the F4 were creating more problems than they needed and called her urgently to have them transferred to another department. It was a hellish day just trying to find a department willing to take them in, and finally, they ended up sitting in her already very crowded office, staring at sullen her.
The only good thing was that IT agreed immediately to block Tsukasa's email. You can't have everything in the world.
"Is this called an internship?" Tsukasa asked nastily, his arms folded as they sat on the sofa in her office. "Picking calls and all?"
"Well you have never seen what it's like to work so shut up." She countered. Tsukasa was about to retort when Soujirou placed his hand over his mouth.
"Iufhwroij!" Soujiro smiled at Tsukushi sweetly.
"So, what else can we do?"
"I honestly have no idea."
"Question." Rui raised his hand, after snapping out of his seeming trance for the day.
"This isn't fucking high school where you have to raise your hands!" Tsukasa told Rui but the boy ignored him.
"How old are you, Makino-san?"
"HUH?" She looked at him somewhat shell-shocked. "Er. 25." He nodded thoughtfully.
"That's one year older than us! Now I'm interested." Akira said as he sat up in his seat. Soujiro smacked Akira on his head.
"Ok, let's not talk about this internship, alright? Look. I am going to talk to you INVIDIVIDUALLY tomorrow, and assess your needs, wants and try to fit you somewhere. Tsubaki entrusted me to you, and I really hope you will learn something."
The four guys looked at her, and shrugged together.
"Whatever."
"Floats your boat."
"OK!"
"Question." Rui raised his hand again. Tsukasa rolled his eyes and muttered 'weird'. "When are dinner hours?"
"ARE YOU SERIOUSLY DUMB RUI?!"
"Oi Tsukasa!"
"Don't hit Jiro!"
"He hit me first!"
"FUCK IT! "
And before Tsukushi knew it, a fight broke out right in front of her. She sighed and got up to leave. Just as she was about to open the door, a hand stopped her and she looked up to see Hanazawa Rui.
"Makino-san, would you like to join me for dinner?" She glanced at the fighting trio and gave up, sighing again.
"Let's go then."
Reviews are appreciated! So Rui scores, abut what happens? More madness and mayhem to come!