A/N: Okay, I know you're all waiting impatiently to find out what comes next, but I just have to say really quick... You guys are all AWESOME. That's the most reviews I've gotten for a single chapter... ever. Y'all rock.

It's Always the Quiet Ones.

Chapter Five.

"Sirius?"

I curled a tiny bit closer in on myself, pretending to be asleep.

Even though I'd just come up five minutes before and could never have fallen asleep that fast. Maybe he wouldn't notice.

"Sirius, I know you're awake."

Damn.

I wondered, not for the first time, why I was friends with a bloody prefect. Then I realized that being a prefect probably had nothing to do with anything, and that I was being an idiot.

Again, not for the first time.

"Sirius, come on, talk to me, please?"

I caved. "Yeah?"

I pulled myself into a sitting position, wincing slightly as the blankets settled around my waist but not willing to be so rude as to actually cover myself. Never before had I felt so naked in front of Remus. Not even when I actually was naked.

Because I was changing or something... I don't make a habit of stripping in front of my friends.

Rolling his eyes, Remus sat down on the edge of my bed. "If I'd known you were going to react like this..." he began, but I cut him off.

"Moony, before you say anything else, I have to tell you something," I said. "I love you, mate, but only as a friend. If this conversation is going to end in you confessing your love for me or something, please, I don't want to know about it. If I don't know, things can stay normal."

All this was barely intelligible because I was talking so fast I tripped over my words, but I think he got the idea.

If his laughter was any indication.

"Padfoot, darling," he got out between chuckles. "The world does not revolve around you, dear."

I blinked, unsure of his point. "I know that," I said.

His response was a mere snort, and disgruntled by his disbelief, I asked, "Okay, why do you say that? What have I done?"

A couple more chuckles. Then, "As tempting as it is to mess with your mind and tell you that I do fancy you, I value our friendship too much to waste it on a prank. Sirius, just because I'm gay doesn't mean I fancy you."

The diss against me did not go unnoticed, but I decided to finish the current conversation first.

"So you're not going to start confessing your love?" I asked, just to clarify.

"No, Padfoot, I promise. No love confessions."

At this, I grinned. The figurative clothes I had been missing earlier returned to my body and I felt normal again.

"So you're attracted to blokes then, huh?" I said as I relaxed into my pillows.

Remus shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so," he said. His awkwardness at the topic of conversation made me feel strangely comforted, as if things were as they should be again.

Not that I wanted Remus to be awkward, but... It was always Remus who was awkward around the topic of dating and sex. Seeing him acting normal about it, while it was tearing me apart... I was glad our roles were back to normal.

"So if it's not me... got your eye on any other guys?" I teased.

"Typical," muttered Remus. Then, "You know Severus Snape?"

Buckets of freezing were dumped into my body, and I could feel my blood turn to ice tea. I'm sure my face turned as white as Lucius Malfoy, whose pale skin was legendary even several years after his graduation.

And something monumental happened. For the first time in my life, Sirius Black's Rule of Conduct #16: Always have a witty comeback, was broken.

I was stunned speechless.

Remus laughed. "The guy that always sits behind him in Potions is pretty good looking," he finished.

As suddenly as the ice tea had arrived it was gone, and replaced with a blush to rival several others that had graced my face the past few days.

"You bastard!" I groaned, swatting at his head. "You scared me half to death!"

Remus fell over into my lap, laughing like a madman and oblivious to the beating I was giving him.

For a moment, he just laughed, and couldn't get out a single word without bursting into another fit of giggles.

"You..." Laughter. "You..." More laughter. "You!" A gasp of air followed by more laughter.

And so it went on, for what seemed like an hour. I joined in too, of course, after he gave up on talking. I was never one to not appreciate a joke, even when it was on me.

We laughed together for what must have been a good ten minutes before Remus even managed to say "You should have seen the look on your face when you thought... thought I fancied Snape." Then he calmed to mock-seriousness. "I didn't hear any objections from you though. I'm glad to know you would support me no matter who I chose."

I smacked him again. "You know I would disapprove if you liked Snivellus," I said.

"Oh, so you weren't silent on purpose?" he asked.

"No," I said with a glare. "You made me speechless, okay? I admit it! I was shocked beyond words."

The mock-seriousness morphed into a grin and giggles returned.

"Wait until I tell James and Peter!" he said.

Another groan left my throat, followed by a threat. "You tell James and Peter about this and I swear to god I'll... I'll tell them why I believed you," I said.

"Touché." He sat up.

I took the opportunity to tackle him, now that he wasn't on my legs anymore.

Taken by surprise, he didn't put up much resistance and I pinned him to the bed in no time. "You know Severus Snape," I muttered. Then, settling myself comfortably atop Remus, I asked another question that had been bothering me. "Why don't you want them to know, anyway?"

"Can't... breath," was Remus's reply.

I looked down on him, and finding him bright red and gasping for breath I decided it would be best to let him go.

When I did so with a muttered "sorry" he looked grateful. Slowly the alarming color faded from his face, and he regained his breath.

"So what did Slughorn think of your essay?" he asked.

I glared for what seemed like the millionth time that night. "Don't you be changing the subject, Moony darling," I said. "Why don't you want James and Peter to know that you're gay?"

Remus took a deep breath. "I suppose I owe it to you, to explain," he said. I wasn't sure what he meant by that, why he owed me anything, but I nodded, urging him to go on.

And he did.

A/N: God, I'm sorry. I wasn't actually intending to do that, but I had about a thousand words and... I didn't want the chapter to end in the MIDDLE of his explanation and... Okay, no good excuse. I'm sorry, don't kill me! I'll have the next chapter up soon!