Hello all! Sorry for the wait, I was at home (you all know the deal with that, lol, I had no chance in Hell). But, alas, here we are at the... (counts) penultimate chapter of To Be Loved! It's been a hell of a ride for me, and I hope it has been for you all too. I really loved writing this, and I'm content with the ending...I literally couldn't end it any other way. But y'all will see soon enough. XD Thanks again to everyone who stuck with me, and read, and a special thanks to the reviews. You guys (gals, lol) are great.

Onto the story!

Triple H had just gotten off the phone with the police officer for the third time that day when the door opened and the Undertaker walked in. After the suspension, 'Taker had set up camp at a hotel near WWE HQ, determined to find Shawn. Hunter didn't live too far away, but the two men figured it would be best if they worked together, and he commuted back and forth between his home and 'Taker's hotel room, exchanging information.

"Any word?" they asked at the same moment, expressions mirroring one another's concern.

"I just called the cops," Hunter explained, sitting wearily on a the nearest sofa. "They haven't seen a trace of him… It's been a goddamn week since we filed the report, and they don't have any idea where he could be!"

'Taker sat down on the arm chair, resting his head against the back, sighing heavily. "I just got back from his house in Texas…nothing. He's not there, he's not at my house, he's not at your house, he's not with any of the boys in the back…" He sighed again. "I don't know where else to look."

Hunter began pacing, kicking at whatever was in his way. "So, either he's hiding from us, or…something's happened." He hated to say it aloud, but the thought had been with him since he first heard the news.

"And it's our fault," Mark added, finishing the thought, voice low and sad. He was tired from the three back-to-back plane rides, exhausted from the searching… He didn't have the strength to even be angry with himself anymore.

"If something happened to him…" Triple H shook his head, and began pacing faster, blond hair flowing behind him. "I'll die."

The Undertaker gave a low, bitter chuckle. "Well then, I guess they'll be having at least two funerals, because I'm pretty sure I'd die too." He thought for a moment, frowning. "And this time I won't be coming back," he added quietly.

Hunter looked over at the Deadman, smiling ruefully at the sentiment. After that last fight, it seemed as though they had reached some kind of mutual understanding, and what both men had thought to be hatred vanished in the face of their love for Shawn…and the fear that they had lost him.

'We both absolutely love Shawn,' Hunter thought, sitting slowly on the sofa again. 'And…we both need him… And Mark knows the emptiness I'm feeling now because he's feeling it too…' Feeling his eyes mist up, he buried his face in his hands, taking a shallow breath.

'Taker sat up, looking at Helmsley with a sad glance after hearing a low sob. "Hunter," he began, standing up and walking over to the other man. "Don't let this drag you down. It's only been a few weeks… He could show up at any moment."

"And if he never shows up again?"

"I'm willing to wait forever to see if he does."

Hunter felt a hand pat him on the shoulder, and he looked up, blinking back tears. "You're right, it's just…hard."

"I know." The Undertaker sat on the sofa next to Triple H. "And when--if--he does come back to us… There's no guarantee that he'll forgive us." He crossed his arms, eyes closing with thought. "Just imagining that he'll return and tell us to fuck off is hard too."

The Game nodded slowly. "I'm worried about that too. We treated him like shit for months and tried to make him choose…He only wanted us to get along, for his sake… We've basically screwed ourselves over on this one." He wiped at his eyes again, becoming angry at the tears. Triple H knew he wasn't a crying type of guy, but when it came to Shawn…

"He sure has a way of breaking a guy," the Undertaker said with a half-smile, and Triple H could only nod.

"You know, now that I think about it, I knew all along that Shawn loved you and…if he loved you, well, I should have loved you too, just because he was in love with you," Hunter mused aloud. "If that makes any sense."

The Undertaker gave a faint smile. "It does. Because on the ride back here, I realized what an asshole I was for asking Shawn to choose between me and the man he's loved for well over ten years. I just…didn't see it until now."

"Me neither."

The two men sat in silence for a few minutes then, both feeling the exhaustion that comes from a week of worry and searching, both feeling slightly comforted by the other's presence. And while it wasn't much, it was better than nothing, and without Shawn there, it was the best they could hope for.

"Can I stay with you tonight?" Hunter asked suddenly in a low voice, almost as though he was whispering. "I don't want to go back to my house, especially not now, not alone." He wiped away a few stray tears. "There are pictures of him everywhere, you know?"

'Taker nodded, managing small smile. "Sure, you can stay with me. But you're not sleeping in my bed, Helmsley."

As the Undertaker opened his eyes the next morning, he was surprised to smell breakfast, stomach growling almost instantly, and he wondered when was the last time he had eaten. He looked over at the other bed, seeing it messy, but unoccupied, and assumed that Triple H had ordered the food from room service.

"Helmsley?" he called, somewhat sleepily.

"What?" His voice came from the area of the sofa, and sure enough, there he was, wide awake, already on the phone.

"What are you doin'?"

"Seeing if the police have any new info." He smirked as he looked up at the Deadman, who was just sitting up. "Hey, you might want to, uh, fix yourself up a bit there. Ever heard of the word 'bedhead?' 'Cause you got a bad case of it right now."

'Taker gave him a sarcastic smile. "Fuck you," he said with a yawn before heading to the shower.

"I got breakfast already," Hunter called after him, smiling at the small nod he got in return. "Shawn really has good taste," he mused aloud, hanging up the phone gently. The police were completely useless to him now--he didn't even know why he bothered calling, especially so damn early… He had called Kevin to ask if he had seen any hint of Shawn, but the big man made it clear--for the last time, he vowed--that if Hunter called him again without Shawn by his side, he'd kill the Game next time he saw him.

If Shawn never came back, not only had he lost his lover and best friend, but he gained a hell of a lot of enemies.

Triple H heard the shower running, and sighed. 'Is this how it's going to be if Shawn doesn't come back?' he wondered, sitting back and popping a piece of buttered toast into his mouth. 'Mark's the only one who understands what I'm going through… If Shawn never comes back, he's the only one I'll be able to talk to…the only one I'll be able to turn to, because he's in the same boat as me.' He felt a bitter smile on his lips as he looked up at the ceiling.

"Ah, sweet irony. You are soooo cruel, Shawn."

'Taker had gotten dressed in the bathroom and when he came out, Hunter was sitting listlessly on the couch, head back, with toast sticking out of his mouth.

"Damn," Mark muttered as he sat opposite him, making a bowl of cereal. "You look enthusiastic today."

Triple H gave a shrug and sat up. "So…What do we do now?" he asked bluntly and suddenly. "We've looked everywhere… If he's going to come back, it's going to be on his terms, and who knows how long that's going to be."

"If he comes back…" 'Taker repeated, shaking his head, starting in on the cereal. He was quiet for a long moment, thinking everything over. "Honestly, I have no idea where we go from here…I don't think it'd be wise to show up at the WWE anytime soon." He sighed and put one long leg on the coffee table, sitting back in his chair. "And as much as I hate to admit it, your company is making this somewhat bearable."

"Believe me, the feeling is mutual," Hunter said with a short laugh. "If this is the lesson we were supposed to learn, I think we've learned enough."

"Yeah, but we learned it already, and he's still not back."

The two men looked at one another for a moment.

"So…are we supposed to fall in love or something?" Triple H asked sarcastically. "Is that the magical miracle that'll bring Shawn back?"

'Taker smiled slightly. "I hope not," he said, shaking his head. "Because I don't think I could ever fall in love with ya, Hunter… no offense."

"None taken," the Game conceded with a grin. "Of course, you haven't slept with me yet, so you never know."

There was a long silence, and both men suddenly realized what an interesting situation they were in at the moment.

It's funny how not hating a guy will change your perception of him.

'Taker coughed and stood quickly, avoiding Hunter's eyes completely. "Well, that's not disturbing at all," he muttered to himself as much as to Hunter. "I guess I'm going to the gym now..."

"Wait… I'll go with you! And you know I was just kidding about sleeping with you, right?" Triple H said quickly, grabbing his bag and putting on his sneakers.

"Were you?" the Undertaker asked, turning to face Hunter, eyebrow raised.

Triple H shrugged, and, to Mark's utter surprise, blushed a little. "Somewhat," he said after a moment, looking suddenly confused. "I mean, you are pretty good looking…well, I really mean that…ah, fuck it." Hunter grew tired of his words and simply walked up to Mark, dropping his bag.

"What I mean is this," he whispered, and then closed his eyes and pressed his lips gently against the bigger man's.

'Taker surprised even himself when he didn't push the Game away--in fact, if he dared to admit it to himself, it was almost…comforting to be kissed again. Slowly, carefully, he began to kiss Hunter back, bringing his arms around the smaller man's waist.

Hunter opened his eyes wide, shocked that he hadn't been punched yet, and was met with the rare and beautiful sight of the Undertaker kissing him back, his green eyes shut, expression somewhere between confusion and concentration.

"What are we doing?" he asked breathily, wrapping his arms around Mark's neck.

"I don't know," 'Taker answered, gasping as Hunter's tongue invaded his mouth. Cruelly, however, his mind went back to Bradshaw's words to him, and he pushed Triple H away. "But whatever we're doing, we can't."

Hunter sighed and backed off, arms dropping to his sides. "Sorry, I just…wanted to kiss you." The rare blush appeared again. "Sorry about that."

"It's okay. I think we just need to…forget everything for a while," Mark said with a long sigh. He wasn't sure if he should be more disturbed about the fact that he was kissing Hunter, or the fact that he was enjoying it. "Maybe we'll hit the bars later?"

Triple H composed himself with a breath, smiling faintly. "Definitely. But first and foremost, we should go get some ice cream."

'Taker couldn't help but chuckle at that one. "You sound like Shawn," he said with a smile, perhaps the first real smile he'd had in a long time.

"It's what Shawn would do right about now, y'know?" Hunter laughed as they walked out the door together, the awkward moment behind them, at least for the moment. "He'd have me in the damn shop eating ice cream all morning, and we wouldn't ever actually get to the gym--"

"Hey, don't try to blame your gut on me."

Both men froze in place, right in front of the room they had been in, and turned around slowly at the sound of the oh-so-familiar voice.

There was Shawn, standing behind them, hands clasped in front of him, blue eyes bright as ever. His golden hair was free of any restraint, and fell freely over his strong shoulders, shining as beautifully as his hesitant smile.

"Hey guys," he said softly, breaking the spell of stillness that had fallen on them all. "I'm sorry I was gone for so long."

Hunter dropped his bag, brown eyes wide and quickly filling with tears. "Shawn!" he exclaimed, running to his best friend and embracing him warmly. The Undertaker stood there, completely still for a moment before walking over to Shawn and hugging him tightly as well.

"Jesus, Shawn, we were so worried!" Triple H began, stepping back, words coming out in a rush. "We called the police! We looked everywhere! We were thinking that something had happened or--"

"Something did happen," Shawn said somewhat gravely, gaze dropping to the floor. He took a deep breath. "While I was away…I made my choice."

Shawn's back! But he has made his choice...Who did he choose?

Last chapter up soon... (sobs)

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