"Will somebody tell me what is going on?" you demanded, feeling annoyed.
As soon as you had arrived back at the building from a day out with your grandma, you had been stuffed in a van, driven across town, pulled into a hotel, and now you were sitting on a bed, looking around in confusion at the serious-faced people around you.
"Matsuda has been taken captive by Yotsuba…it seems he stumbled into one of their meetings," Yagami explained shortly, pushing a mattress on to the balcony.
"Captive? What do you mean captive? Is his life in danger?" you asked, walking over to help Yagami with the mattress.
As you finally manipulated it into place, Yagami turned and fully explained the situation to you. "Matsuda was found eavesdropping on Yotsuba, he pretended that he was there to promote Misa-san for a commercial, and so Ryuuzaki had to devise a plan for Matsuda to escape."
You glanced warily at the mattress, thinking 'I don't think I'm going to like the sound of this plan…'
"While Misa-san has Yotsuba distracted, Matsuda is to feign drunkenness and attempt to balance on the edge of the balcony, which is several levels directly above this room. He will lose his balance and go over the edge. The plan is to catch him on this mattress and make it look as though Matsuda has fallen to his death."
Worry coursed through you as a thought occurred, "Won't that leave a chance that Matsuda will misjudge the fall and actually…miss the mattress?"
Yagami looked down at his hands before conceding, "Yes, there is a chance of that occurring. However, this is the only way that there will even be a small percentage chance of Matsuda being recovered safely."
You gaped, unable to believe what you were hearing. 'That's the safest thing they thought of? They want him to jump off a balcony?'
"Matsuda is balancing on the ledge, be ready Yagami-san, Ahiru-chan, Wedy-san," L's voice interrupted through the speaker.
"Yes, Ryuuzaki-san, everything is in place," Yagami confirmed, moving to secure the mattress.
Before you could react, Matsuda fell from above, landing heavily on the mattress. In the same instant, Wedy threw a brown sack over the edge of the balcony. As the heavy sack impacted with the hard cement, it made a sickening noise. Matsuda's face lit up as he realised he had survived the ordeal, and he stumbled over and collapsed on the bed as his legs gave out on him. You moved across and sat next to him, feeling helpless in the circumstances. "Matsuda-kun…" you whispered to the overstressed investigator, "You made it."
After the entire Matsuda episode had come to a conclusive finish, the man himself sought you out the day after, standing quietly behind your chair in the main room.
"A-Ahiru-chan, I need to talk to you," Matsuda said, stumbling slightly over your name.
You looked at him in confusion, wondering what had him so nervous. "Yeah, sure. I'll be finished this in an hour or so…"
Matsuda's face fell and he looked over to the side. "I was actually wondering if we could talk now? It's important."
You raised an eyebrow at his words, but nonetheless you pushed your chair back and stood. "Where do you want to go?" you asked, glancing at L.
L quickly turned back to his computer, and you wondered why he was avoiding your gaze. "Somewhere private?" Matsuda suggested, making it obvious that he didn't believe that such a place existed within a 50mile radius of L.
"Ok, c'mon. We can go on the rooftop. I'm pretty sure that Ryu-kun hasn't any equipment set up there," you said, making your way to the exit.
Matsuda quickly followed you, his features still betraying his anxiety. L watched over his shoulder as the two of you disappeared through the doorway. Inwardly, he cursed himself for failing to bug the rooftop.
"So what is it?" you questioned, leaning your elbows against the railing surrounding the rooftop.
"Ever since…I was held by Yotsuba…I've been thinking," Matsuda began, his eyes downcast, "And, I realise now…that my feelings for you are never going to be returned."
Shock reverberated through your body, your eyes widening an almost impossible amount as his blunt confession registered. You spluttered, unable to form a coherent sentence. "M-Matsuda! I…you…what? When? How long?"
He nervously smiled his quirky grin and replied, "About a few hours after I first met you."
You mind desperately searched back through your memories, trying to piece together evidence to confirm his story.
'"Good morning, Ahiru-chan!" chimed Matsuda's voice from the doorway. You glanced up from your work and nodded a greeting before ignoring the energetic policeman. Matsuda visibly deflated by your lack of reply, and trudged into the room muttering to himself.
"Umm…would Ahiru-chan like to get coffee with me?" Matsuda asked, a blush spreading across his face.
Taken aback, you took a second to reply. "Not today, Matsuda-san, maybe another day?"
His smile faltered a little but he nodded acceptance of your reply. "Another day then, Ahiru-chan."
You pushed the door open into the main headquarters. As you entered, the other members of the investigation looked up and either greeted you by name or nodded in acknowledgement. "Ohiyo, Ahiru-chan!" called Matsuda, a little too eagerly.'
"You mean…all those times? All those small things you've done for me…all that support you've given me, the encouragement to keep on going even when everything looks like it's about to come apart…that wasn't just because we're friends?"
Matsuda shook his head slowly, intently watching your face for your reaction, as if he expected you to shout at him and storm away. You, however, were in such a state, that such a thought didn't even think of appearing to your struggling reasoning processes. "So…" you began, starting to pull yourself back together, "Why did you decide that I wouldn't feel the same way?"
His nervous smile twisted bitterly as he replied, "Even after only knowing you for less than a day, my mother knew that you didn't love me…that you were in love with someone else…"
You inhaled sharply, afraid of what he might say. "I couldn't see it before, I just thought that you were too shy or too embarrassed to make a move…so I kept trying to make you notice me, make you appreciate the things I was doing for you."
Matsuda paused, his expression conveying defeat. "I should have known that it wouldn't make a difference…and I know that I'll never be as smart, or as rich or even able to compare to him in any way…but…"
Conviction suddenly appeared in his eyes, and he turned to you. "But, I know that if you had let me, for your happiness…I would have given you everything."
Your mind had deserted you and had left you to deal with the situation by yourself. Matsuda's words had paralysed you, leaving you with nothing to say, no words of comfort or reassurance for the man who had just admitted his love for you. "M-Matsuda…I…had no idea that you felt that way about me…I really don't know what to say…" you stammered, afraid of the tense silence engulfing you both.
His signature smile crossed his face once again, lightening his features. "It's okay, I've come to terms with the fact that you're in love with someone else…I only wanted you to know, just in case something happened and it was too late for me to tell you. I think that would have been worse, because that would mean that I never really admitted my feelings…and in a sense, there would never be any proof that I had them."
Something he had said hadn't made sense to you, and you apprehensively asked, "When you said that you'd never be able to compare to him…who did you mean?"
Matsuda gave you a surprised glance, as if he didn't expect such a question. "You never realised?"
"Realised what?" you questioned, drawing your brows together.
"Well…I guess you'll have to figure it out for yourself," Matsuda said, before grinning, "I can give you a hint though."
"Yes?" you asked, coming across a little overenthusiastic.
"Look at what you keep close to your heart. I think that will tell you what you must already know on a deeper level," Matsuda smiled, surprising you with his wise words.
You mulled over his idea, trying to decide what you kept close. "I guess you must have a bit to think about, so I'll let you think in peace," Matsuda said, grinning wryly as he patted your shoulder before walking to the door.
"Hey, Ahiru-chan?"
Pulled from your thoughts, you turned at looked at him questioningly. "Thanks for letting me tell you. It really makes you feel better, when you finally admit it to that person."
With that, Matsuda walked through the doorway, leaving you staring at an empty space.
'What I keep close to my heart?'
You struggled over the concept for a while before eventually conceding defeat and retiring to your room. As you entered through the doorway, you smiled as your bedside table came into view. Sitting on your bed, you picked up the daruma doll L had given you went you visited the festival together. Running your fingers over the smooth surface, memories of that day came flooding back. Setting the doll back down, you picked up the object to its left. It was a photo frame, and inside was a photo of L grimacing as you partially strangled him to make him stay in the picture. You thought back to that warm, eventful night when you had dragged L into the arcade, and had made him agree to a photo in one of the booths.
'"Aww…c'mon, Ryu-kun! It's just one tiny little photo!" you pleaded, pulling him closer and closer to your goal.
"I have remained alive so long, Ahiru-chan, because of my ability to stay out of photos…" L grumbled, nevertheless, walking with you.
"Well, there'll only be one, and I'll make sure that no one ever sees it but me and you. Happy?" you grinned, using both of your arms to propel him closer to the booth.
He sighed in defeat, and you inwardly cheered. Pushing him into the booth, you selected the type of photo and waited for the flash. At the last second, L tried to escape, however, you wrapped an arm around his neck rendering him unable to move. Unfortunately, you practically cut off his oxygen supply, but you considered that a small sacrifice for a photo of him and you together. As it finished printing, you held it up to L's face, waiting for his comment. "Fine, you can keep that one. But no more photos…ever," he had grudgingly agreed.
You thanked him with a hug, before sliding the photo into your coat pocket, just next to your heart.'
Your eyes widened, staring down at photo frame in your shaking hands. The pieces were slowly falling together, making sense of the confusing jigsaw in your mind when it came to the dark-haired genius. "The one I love is…L?"