It was my fault. I could have told them to get out, I could have told them to go to the ground floor and wait for proper instructions but I didn't. I told them to sit tight and that I would find out what was going on and tell them what to do. I didn't think that another plane was going to hit the building, the building that we were in, that I walked out of only to look up and see the plane hit the building, possibly even the floor and the room that I had just been in, the room that my friends were dying in.
I could feel my legs getting ready to give out on me, I looked over at Bones and she picked up Parker and together they held me. Then she led me to a bench where we sat and just looked at the pit, the fence around the pit, the other people who like us all had tears in their eyes as they looked at and took in the same things we were.
I did not think I would ever come back here. I avoided New York like the plague. When I was with Cam she always wanted to go to New York. I always came up with excuses not to go. After the attack I stayed and helped pull bodies out of the wreckage. I was still Army at that point and so I had full clearance to help as much as I wanted. No one ever asked me to leave or to get out of the way, they, we needed all the help we could get. I helped search for a week. When the decision was made that it was no longer searching for people and it was now body recovery I left.
I couldn't be there anymore, I had to leave New York. I broke up with Cam, turned in my equipment to the Army and moved back to Philadelphia. I sat in my room at my parents house for three weeks before I turned in my application to the FBI. Someday I would tell Bones and Parker my real reasons but for now…now I cant. At least not ready to tell Parker.
"Let's go home now." I said after a few minutes.
Bones stood up still holding Parker and we walked back to the car. When we got to the car I went to the passenger side and climbed in. She helped Parker buckle into his seat and turned on a movie for him and then she climbed into the driver seat without asking any questions. She always knew when to ask and when not to. I could tell she wanted to ask but somehow she knew not to ask in front of Parker.
"Daddy can we get pizza for dinner when we get home?" Parker asked once we got onto the freeway heading home.
"Sure Bub but it will be late. Way past bedtime even so we may stop on the way before we get home. He accepted my answer and turned back to his movie, he was asleep within a half hour.
"Thank you Bones." I finally said to her after spending two hours staring out the window watching the lines in the road.
"Booth I was there too you know. My roommate from college was one of the missing. All that we have found from her so far was her wallet. That is why I was there, I had to help find her and all the others. They need to go home to their families Booth." She said reaching over and putting her hand on my leg. "It helps to share, to talk about what happened Booth, it helps. Those of us who were there and even those who just saw it on TV it affected everyone. We wont ever forget and talking about it helps."
"It just hurts so much Bones." I said as my voice broke. I leaned my head against the window and closed my eyes.
"Partners in this too Booth. When you are scared you hug me. That is what you said isn't it? You are always here when I need you and I am here for you." She said squeezing my leg one last time before putting her hand back on the wheel and driving home.
I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew Bones was leaning over me running her fingers down my cheek waking me up to go inside. I looked in the back for Parker and he was already out of the car carrying a McDonalds Happy Meal box.
"Daddy you didn't have any bad dreams when you were sleeping this time." He said bouncing around Bones and I as we walked into the house. He was right, no bad dreams with Bones. I could actually sleep when I was around her. In her office on the couch while she worked, when we were out of town for work, last night when she came over, in the car just now. No bad dreams with Bones.