A/N: YAY NO CENA IN THE TITLE MATCH AT ONE NIGHT STAND! GO JBL! CENA'S GOING TO BLEED LIKE THE BITCH HE IS!

I'm done now.

Operation "Sneak Alana in the Center and Avoid Phyllis the Fire Breathing Receptionist at all Costs" is in full effect. How are we going to do this?

I have no fucking idea.

I'm not the sneaky one! Alana is the one that got my tired ass back to the hotel all on her own without me noticing. If anyone is going to plan this, Alana has to.

"So, Alana, what's your master plan to get you back into Phyllis's prison of death?" I asked as we checked out of the hotel. It was approximately noon, which gave us an hour to get to the clinic and get Alana in, preferably without Phyllis freaking out on me and banning me from seeing Alana.

"I'm not planning anything at all, Punkaroo. This is allllll on you. You were the one that wanted to take me out, so you're the one that's going to have to sneak me back in," Alana said, teasing me.

"I hate being toyed with," I said.

"Hm, your nipple rings sure don't say that about you."

Why does everyone make fun of the nip rings?

"Come on. We've got a drive to make," I said. Looks like I really do have to take the reigns on this one.

It was 12:45 when we pulled into the parking lot of the clinic. The only reason it took so long was because we had to stop for gas and then Alana wanted to feed the ducks bread at the park. I like feeding ducks. I started quacking at them until a giant goose came and chased me away.

Don't laugh. That goose was fucking scary, man. It waddled like Batista and sounded like Jericho squealing in pain. Yeah, I told you it was creepy.

"Okay, so this is what we're going to do," Alana said as I turned off the ignition.

Er, am I missing something here?

"I thought that I had to come up with the plan…" I sighed.

She started laughing at me. Thanks, Alana. You really know how to make a guy feel special. "Sorry, Punk, but your idea of a plan would involve dressing up in penguin suits and giving Phyllis a peace offering of Pepsi."

HOW DID SHE KNOW?!

"Are you psychic?" I asked. Come on, that was rather creepy. How did she know about my secret love of penguins? I mean, sure, the Pepsi thing is obvious. You don't get something tattooed on you unless you really love it, and I love me some ice cold Pepsi.

"Yes. I am. Now here's the plan. You're going to say you're visiting Kenny and she should let you in. Actually, I think Phyllis is working the later shift today. She shouldn't be in until two. Diane should be working the front desk. So you'll say you're visiting Kenny and she'll let you in. Then you run to the back and let me in through that door. I'll sneak around there once you go in. Deal?"

I'm not smart enough for this.

"Okay," I shrugged. What else could I do?

"Hello, how are you today?" a woman who I assumed was Diane asked. Wow, what a step up from Phyllis. She was probably in her early twenties and seemed like a nice woman. She was smiling and everything. I bet Phyllis is too old to smile.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking. I'm here to see Kenny," I said, just according to plan.

"Oh, go right ahead," Diane said. Nice.

I walked down the hallway like everything was normal but took a turn down a different hallway. I saw Alana through the glass doors. I hope to god that there's no alarm on these things…

Phew, that was good. She walked in the building and we went back to her room.

"Thanks," she said, giving me a hug. "I had a great time."

"Me too," I said, not wanting to let go of her, but I had to. "I should be going…"

"Yeah. Do that."

"MR. PUNK WHERE IS ALANA?"

Oh shit. I'd notice that howl from anywhere.

Phyllis has come to work early.

"She's in her room, Phyllis. Where else would she be?"

"I don't know, but the third shift receptionist left a note and said that Alana never returned here. What did you do to her?"

"I didn't do anything to her. She's in her room."

"Let's take a little walk, Mr. Punk."

I wanted to say to Phyllis that if we were taking a walk, I'd need to get her a leash, but I refrained from doing so. She might burn me to a crisp with her fire breathing abilities.

We walked down the hallway to Alana's room. Just like I knew she would be, Alana was lounging on her bed. "What's up, Phyllis?" she said, and I had to stifle a giggle.

Yes, I giggle.

"What are you doing here?" Phyllis asked in shock.

Okay, a giggle now slipped out.

"I live here, Phyllis. What do you think?"

"You…" she said, turning to me, and then leaving.

"Good work," I said. "But now, we talk."

A/N: Next chapter is the last one.