Well, here is the end of The Isuki Chronicles... It makes me sad, but at the same time, it was necessary.
Reputation
She hadn't meant to say anything at first
She hadn't meant to say anything at first. It had just… slipped out, straight from her lips to his.
It had started simply enough…
"I don't really look that much like my mom, do I?"
"Yes, you do."
"Oh, great; you're not gonna be like Deidara was and start telling me that all the time, are you?"
"Of course not. Although I have to admit your appearance reminds me of her, but when I look at you I see you, not her. I never really liked her, anyway; it was like she always needed someone. It was ridiculous."
"Really?"
"Except for the eyes. Just be glad you got your father's eyes."
"I know. Mom's eyes were pretty creepy. I never got a full explanation for it, either. She'd always say she'd tell me later, and here I am, later, except she's not here anymore. And she never told me how I happened, come to think of it! Dad won't tell me anything, either, like he wants to forget her entirely or something. Like, 'poof', she's gone."
"At last you don't see him telling you that you look like your mom."
"That's cheating; he can't even see me."
"True. But at least you had me to induct you into that other, mystical world."
"What-? Oh, yeah. Yeah."
"You sound like Deidara."
"That's not funny; now that he's dead and gone I want him to stay that way. Stop reminding me!"
"And you don't sound like your father at all…"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Oh, it's not like you're trying to forget about Deidara after he's only been gone for a few weeks. At least Itachi waited about a year before going completely numb."
"Yeah, but I didn't love Deidara. I still don't."
"Flattery will get you nowhere."
"Gods, you're so stiff."
"You're digging yourself a hole, you know."
"Oh, like that's going to help me. You know, just shut up; I don't feel like talking to you anymore."
"Fine. You swear you won't mind?"
"Mind wha-?"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…Won't mind that."
"Um, no, I-I don't mind…"
"Good. Now shut up for a bit."
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…It was my fault, you know…"
"…"
"…"
"…What?"
"…"
"…"
"…I told where the base was, so we'd have to leave… And then Eris would get left behind, and she wouldn't be glaring at me all the time…"
"…"
"…"
"…What?"
"…"
"…"
"It was my fault they found the base… And my fault my mom died… And my fault you came and Eris stayed…"
"…"
"…"
"…Really."
Isuki glared bitterly down at Sasori, trying to struggle free of the stupid razor thingy cord that came out of where his stupid stomach was supposed to be and kept her stupid arms pinned to her stupid body.
"You could at least let me walk," she vied. "You don't have to keep me dangling up here."
"No," he responded curtly, not even looking up at her as he strode purposefully toward the meeting hall. "Knowing you you'll try something, and I would rather not have to deal with that kind of annoyance right now."
Isuki was beginning to panic. Dammit why did I say anything?! Aaargh, idiot, idiot, idiot! Stupid, why'd you go and open your mouth… Besides that? Great, this is just perfect… Stupid damned fucking mouth why…?!
"You know, I didn't really mean that. I just wanted to see how you'd react, and look; it livened you up a little, just like I'd hoped!"
"Nice try, you manipulative little wench."
Isuki was resigned to waiting impatiently and sighing in frustration until the others showed up in the meeting hall. After they all filtered in, Sasori dropped her unceremoniously in the middle of the ring they formed, pulling back his line with a slight whir and a flick of poison. A droplet landed on her cheek, and it burned like dry ice until she wiped it off and glared at him again, sticking out her tongue.
"Sasori," Leader asked blandly, making an all-encompassing hand gesture, "what is… this?"
Isuki dropped her eyebrows and glared at him, too, hardly daring to believe that she was being ignored for fear of what she might end up doing. Then again, maybe she'd finally end up going feral like her mom and freeze in time, and she'd last forever… like Sasori… Because beautiful things last forever.
"Well, Sir, I have discovered something very disconcerting."
"Aw, will you cut the crap and just tell us what the fuck you're talking about?"
Isuki looked up at him, still spread out on the ground, propped up on one elbow. She looked up at the one who had once told her a story about monsters, then round the circle. The empty spot where six years ago someone had walked into the wrong room… The people who had raised her; fed her, played with her, or in some cases merely tolerated being played with.
"Well…"
But Sasori would ruin it. He would tell them how they had all been her playthings, her toys, the figures she moved across the chessboard with an invisible hand. He didn't really care what they would do to her when they found out. He didn't really care about her at all. He never had, had he? He never would care, about anything, except for the cheap imitation of human obsession he harbored for his stupid puppets, because his puppets would last forever. So she wanted to get mad, get angry, get pissed, because then she could go feral and last forever, and he would care.
She would make him care.
"Isuki is the reason for that attack a few years back, back when Michiko died."
"…W-…What?"
She glanced up again and saw her dad's expression. At least he didn't physically wince this time, just a twitch in his right eye. The right of the sightless pair that were drains for an unfathomable agony, pouring out their pain on anyone who fell under their hawkish gaze.
"Do you have any idea why?" Leader didn't ask Isuki if it was true; obviously her trustworthiness had plummeted. They talked about her like she wasn't there, like they didn't even care to hear her side of it, her motive.
But he wouldn't have understood! He never would have understood! She had killed her own mother, and in doing so killed him. And with him went that secret, hidden recess of kindness and understanding, and all hope of him ever forgiving her. Everything had just drained out of him after that until nothing was left but the ghost of person, a replica in flesh and blood of the father that had thrived before.
"Not really, Sir. If you ask me I think she's just delirious and a tad unstable."
Isuki broke when she heard that, heard him say that about her. Her head drooped, then snapped back up with an eerie twisting sound.
"You liar!" she screamed, pulling herself quickly to her feet and bracing as if for attack, but instead she stood their angled slightly, screeching at him. She had cracked, and she just leaked out through the small break, but the pressure kept building up and roiling inside her until it smashed through and gushed out of her in a wild, raging torrent.
"You never told me that! You never told me what you thought of me, not now or ever before! You never cared enough to assign me characteristics, but I did it for you! I had no idea what it was but I wanted to be with you and have you there and touch you, have you hold me and feel you in and all around me all the time and I didn't know why! I just wanted it but Eris was always there hovering and making sure nothing happened and glaring at me like I was the spawn of demons! I had to do it so we would move and she would have to stay so I could have you, but you still didn't care! Granted I didn't know the difference but I felt it in the way you touched me you never really cared about me! It's not my fault my mom got killed, it's not!" She was crying by this point, but they were tears of rage, not sorrow. Or at least she managed to tell herself that. "I just wanted you to love me!..."
She collapsed again and huddled on the floor, but only because she wanted to. Someone touched her shoulder, but she jerked away and shot to her feet again. She didn't see who it was but she didn't care, she screamed at him anyway. "You never cared because I wouldn't last forever like your stupid perfect puppets and your stupid perfect you! They're not going to last forever, though! None of them! I will, but none of you will last forever!"
Isuki shot off and tore out through the window, ripping shredded tears into her clothes and skin, pulling out her wings. None of them would last, but she would. She could fly, but none of them could. Smirking, she flew up high and built up her chakra for something she had made herself. She had stolen inspiration from Deidara and her dad, but it was hers. She arched backwards and sucked in an impossibly deep breath and-
Fire exploded from her mouth. It couldn't be contained in a steady, regulated stream and burst loose like a starved beast ripping through the bars of its cage, falling on the base and everyone in it, devouring it as she guided it to the points most easily digested to help feed its growth. That was something her father had never understood, or Deidara, for that matter. Not completely anyway, but she had taken care of him before he figured it out. You couldn't use fire like a weapon, couldn't force it and then leave it to die.
You had to love the fire, nurture it like a child while it grew a more independent mind while you told it gently what to do until it gained enough force to do whatever it saw fit. Isuki loved the fire, and the power it gave her, and the natural ability she had for fanning its conquering maw.
She flapped down and looked in. The flames were so thick she couldn't see anything, but no human movement made itself evident. Grinning, she turned to go and was suddenly struck by a thought:
What the hells was she supposed to do now? Her life had revolved around the base and the people in it… and the puppet in it…
Isuki lingered a little by the window, watching her fire-spawn eat the base whole.
And someone landed heavily on her back, weighing her down until she slammed into the ground. A hard, unyielding hand ground her face into the grass and dirt, but allowed her just enough leeway to glance out of the corner of her eye to see Kisame drowning her fire, her baby. She gurgled a scream past the turf filling her mouth and choked it out when she was released, but she couldn't move her hands; they were forced behind her back and held there from a distance by Sasori's wirey thingy, like she was something dangerous or some crap like that.
She looked up at them through the mussed up curtain of her hair, willing them all to die where they stood. They had no idea, would never understand.
"Isuki, you're a liability," Leader's voice cut in, cold and clear as you like. "You're more unstable than a boulder on a pin." He didn't say anything else, just jerked his head toward her, like a signal.
She saw something move out of the corner of her eyes, like a little swish, and her field of vision flicked over to one side to encompass it. Isuki saw him just ceasing to lean wearily on his katana and heft it experimentally. She looked up at him, her mouth a hard line and pleading in her eyes, but she got blasted by the sheer miserable loathing that poured out of his.
It was sort of funny because even though no one on the outside really knew, it still bolstered his reputation.
Even after Michiko had died and he had gone almost completely catatonic, it still made people mutter and stories got told, somehow, like the news could fly. It made people tell their children stories at night: "Be good or else…"
Even if he lost a little face, becoming the kind of man who could love and be loved, or have a child, that all got washed away.
Because who wouldn't harbor at least some fear of a man who could execute his own daughter without a second thought?