Life's A Blur Chapter 4: Coffee & TV, a south park fanfic

Author's Notes: Sorry about the delay in uploads, but I'm back. So...4 chapters in and we're already up to my favourite Blur song. :D

Coffee & TV

Kyle's POV

Why is it that even though they call it the LA Adoption Agency, they had to build it RIGHT away from the city – as far away as possible but still in the LA region?! According to a quick search on our friend, the web, the agency is situated about 3 or 4 miles away from where we live – just a bit of a South highway journey and a few baron road turn-offs and bingo, you're there. It's Wednesday late morning and the highway's got its usual selection of busy automobiles and delivery trucks. As I'm sat firmly in the driver seat of my convertible just as I set the heat temperature pressure a level down, Stan is sat beside me in the front passenger seat – his head and elbow leaning on the cool glass of the closed window – staring out into the quick rush of vehicles both in the same AND the opposite direction.

I may be one of the youngest billonaires in this whole dam World, but I still have the social dignity to drive myself to places instead of getting someone else who's paid to drive people places. I was never a fan of that whole 'You're so rich that you can get people to drive you places instead of yourself' thing – I like to set an example that unlike many other rich people, I haven't got my head shoved my ass to the point that I'm too lazy to do some driving once in a while. Besides, I like it – what better than to spend some driving experience on the wide, open and pretty complex American highway systems?!

Anyway, back to the point – Stan and I have a reserved booking at the agency for about 1 o clock – apparently you HAVE to book this 'appointment' thingy for when you want to come and have a look at who you want to adopt. It's no longer just a matter of coming, looking, taking and going...no no no, it's far more complex than that nowadays. But when I said who was coming down the phone to the agency, I'm sure I could someone faint in the background of that call and who wouldn't...a famous, popular and skilled buisnessman/artist and his just-as popular and talentted husband...appearing at THEIR agency. I wonder how much FOX, ABC and all those other TV channels are gunna try and milk and/or criticise this move? I don't care though, Stan's been waiting for this day to come...and I guess...so have I.

"Alright, let's go through this one more time so that we both know what to say." I say – my eyes glued to the jungle of traffic front, side and back. "How many?"

"Two!" Woah, that was quick. "Twins would be nice but I don't mind."

"Alright...and gender?"

We discussed this before we left...yet Stan still hasn't given me an answer. Well Stan? "Ummmmm...alright...boys...I think it WOULD be best if we adopt a gender you and I know well."

"Agreed. Two boys with an option of them being twins."

Stan rests his head on the glass again and the car goes silent again. Bah, I can't stand pure mute silence. "Radio ON...Channel Preset 1..." The radio does its little jingle ping noise and the radio comes to life. 102.6FM – LAFM 1 – One of the main stations I listen to in my spare time. One of those regular daily programmes is on now where they play songs from the past and you have to guess the year. The first track on...

"2006!" Stan shouts and smiles. Looking at him, I can see he just did that for humor means and that certainly raises a smile on my face too.

This highway journey can go on forever so I betta think of flash-back memory to pass the time – making sure I save enough focus for the road AS WELL. Ah yes, I was gunna recall this memory anyway...it relates to why I'm glad Stan wants to have kids. To be honest, it's been one of my life-long wishes...ever since I was the age of 10. That one time back then certainly did provide me wth THE answer to how good me and Stan would be as parents.

AH YES...it was way back once more when me and Stan were 10 years old. Our week-long project of having to look after an egg was done & finished and for some odd reason, we'd done something to help equality in gay marriage...whatever it meant back then. My flashback memory begins just after the wedding me and Stan had been to, had just finished. Stan in MY EYES, had just told Wendy to finally 'Fuck off' and it seemed as if he was totally and completely over her...for good. Obviously, at that point, I couldn't show any REAL mood or emotions of satisfaction wth Stan's wise decision but deep down, I was squeeling and smiling with glee and delight. My inside shouted 'YES', but my face showed nothing. I wanted it to stay that way...coz' that might have given too much away if I smiled. So it was then that I came up with a devious but clever idea to TEST Stan...after all, I really enjoyed that half-week of looking after the egg WITH Stan. Before, I was slightly confused at why I was the only one enjoying the project...for more than just the obvious reason. But I guess it was all down to the confusion of the whole thing and how Stan thought certain things existed and were true...when in fact they weren't.

Do you feel like a chain store?
Practically floored.
One of many zeros,
Kicked around bored.

So, it was time for my idea to commence.

"Hey Stan, can I ask you something?" I asked just as we two sat down on one of the wedding garden's stone stairs. Stan had injured his arm and I'd hit my head pretty badly so we both needed to help each other out to get into a seated position. "It's about this whole project thing we've done."

"Alright, sure."

"Well...the thing is...did you enjoy it?"

"What?! You call JUST avoiding being shot by machine gun fire and JUST avoiding getting blown to bits by some kind of land mines...enjoyable?"

That WAS a predictable answer...I had to agree, that was one hell of a scary way to end the whole project thing. "Well...apart from that...I mean before...during the week...did you enjoy it?"

"Yeh, it was alright...I guess."

Great, I thought – it was just the perfect enough answer to ask him it. "Well...would you wanna do it again? I mean...not for school...but just y'know...for fun?!"

"What!? Why would I want to do THAT again?"

"Aw come on Stan, the only reason why I don't think you enjoyed it as much as I did was because so many things were on yer' mind, am I right."

"Well...yeh, I guess so."

"So how about we try to enjoy it one more time...no bossy school rules and work with it – just us two...as friends...with our egg, please Stan!"

Stan rolled his eyes and smiled. "Oh alright, but I better enjoy it more than I did with the last one."

I stopped myself from hugging him too much coz' that might have given TOO MUCH away.

Your ears are full but you're empty,
Holding out your heart!
To people who never really,
Care how you are.

The next week, Stan and I spend time 'round each other's houses looking after the egg – we gave it a mixture of black and red crayon hair, blue eyes and a red mouth. As I started building all the necessary items to keep it safe...and alive, Stan meanwhile was happy to just look after it whilst I made some other things. I'm surprised that no one stopped us and asked what the hell we were doing...though Cartman never spotted it and whenever Kenny looked at us, he would raise one of his eyebrows and always give us a quick 'Rrrrrrrright' look. Ha, I guess THAT was the beginning of Kenny's hunch into what exactly was going on between me and Stan really...hence, why years later I had to tell him THE truth.

So give me Coffee & TV; history!
I've seen so much I'm going blind,
And I'm brain-dead virtually.
Sociability,
It's hard enough for me.
Take me away from this big bad world and agree to marry me!
So we…can start over again.

So the days passed and me and Stan would always be together – whether it in the kitchen, living room watching TV, the dining room or even in the bedroom...sadly not in the bed though, ha ha. But always, we'd be together with the egg – safe, secure and always protected by us two. I knew that it was during those seven days within that little egg-caring thing that it was the closest me and Stan would ever be together for that present moment...by that time, I'd sworn to myself that I'd never let Stan out of my sight – it had actually come to the point where I personally realised I did indeed...LOVE love him. Whenever Stan had something to do or whenever he had a problem, I'd always be there by his side – either to help, to support, or just to be there with him. But situations like the time I was FORCED to move to San Francisco were hard for me...being split apart from Stan made it feel like my heart was the one that was splitting apart. If anybody else saw just HOW I was looking out of the back-window of my dad's hybrid at Stan, than they would have known how hard that was for me to cope with.

Do you go to the country?
It isn't very far.
There's people there who will hurt you,
Coz' of who you are.

But I guess...it was all forgotten with all the future times and adventures me and Stan spent together. That one abiding memory in particular of when me and Stan went on a little trip across the Coloarado region and eventually, to The Vatican to discover and protect the Secret of Easter. But believe me, you DON'T wanna know how the hell we alone managed to get from America to Italy but trust me...7 and a half hours of being in the air in a dark compact box with me and Stan closely sat beside each other inside it...brilliant...though if we were about eight years older at the time, it so would have been much better, believe me.

Back to the week of taking care of OUR egg, there were times where I'd test Stan further by saying that I was going out somewhere or that I needed him to look after the egg by himself whilst I was away doing what ever I said. Obviously, I lied...after Stan would adorably refuse and finally give in and as soon as I walked out the door, I'd simply walk to a safe distance and peak through the window to check up on what he'd be up to. 4 times I did it...and 4 times it mad me smile – Stan did one hell of a good job. What could be better than seeing the guy you love looking after an egg as if it were our own...well...THAT I guess – what I just mentioned...only in real life. But it looks like that that's going to become an actual reality as soon as we get to this adoption agency.

Your ears are full of the language,
There's wisdom there you're sure!
Until the words start slurring,
And you can't find the door.

Back in the present, I see a digital highway sign on the right-hand side indicating that the spiralling turn-off we need to take is about another mile ahead. You only see it for about five seconds before you pass it, but somehow whoever managed to build those digital signs managed to make sure you know things like how to turn off, direction of present traffic, direction of your vehicle into the turn-off and stuff like that, before it finally passes you and goes out of view.

And yes, Stan was right about the year on that 'guess the year of these tracks' radio programme – I guess hearing 'The Killers' & OUR song kinda gave it away. Despite it being quite sunny and warm today, I decided before we set off to keep the roof on. If past experience is anything to go by, do not NOT have the roof over and on coz' the speed you go down a highway...that is a lot of wind...and kinda learned that the hard way y losing a hat which got blown off my head and onto the past stretch of highway road behind. Plus, the wind gets both mine and Stan's hair in our faces and we both get annoyed when the wind does that. And Kenny too seems to have an annoying habit of knowing that and positioning the air conditioning streams in his house so that they blow the hair into our faces. GAH – darn Kenny and his all-knowing knowledge about what makes us tick...and what annoys us too.

Finally, a mile later – the turn-ff appears underneath a giant over-head digital sign – pointing us directly in the direction we want to be going. I make the turn-off which begins our three spiral descend onto the main road beneath. The main road, just like the highway, stands between two stretched blocks of tropical trees and outstretched freshly cut fields.

Thirty minutes and a three quarters of a mile later...FINALLY...we're here. Los Angeles Adoption Agency Centre as it says on the steel-plated sign at the entrance which is followed by a calming slow-drive up a thin road. The centre is another one of those blocky but compact two or three-storey buildings. As we enter the cr park region, I notice that there's a special isolated space with a sign in front of it. As the car slowly drives closer, me and Stan both smile and guess that this agency really are glad and proud that we're both paying a visit. This spot is reserved for the presence of Stan & Kyle Marsh-Broflovski.

Oh...we can start over again.

A few minutes later, the key card slides out of the automatic ignition and me and Stan hop out – making our way to the front door of the agency up the zig-zagging brick-tiled path. Checking both ourselves over, the reality comes back to me that we're both dressed in a smart but casual way. I'm dressed in a plain black T-Shirt with dark jeans whereas Stan's wearing a navy blue T-Shirt with lighter Jeans – both accustomed with tight squashing belts around the waist.

"You excited?" I look over to Stan as he seems to be walking faster than I am.

"What do you think?! OF COURSE I AM." That last bit certainly shows his excitement.

Oh...we can start over again.

And as we finally stand in front of the door, Stan excitingly presses down on the red button beside the terminal screen and voice speaker. There's a short organ theme played whilst the screen shows us the 'loading, please wait' screen. And finally, it lights up to life as does the speaker. The receptionist on the screen is stunned into shock at the sight of us two. "Oh my God! My staff colleagues weren't kidding...you're really here!"

Author's Comment: I have to thank one person in particular for giving me the idea of that flashback – thanks, you know who you are. ;)