Chapter Four
Another thunder struck, making him shudder in spite of himself. It was getting really bad out; he was glad they managed to escape on time, and fairly in one piece. And that brought back the last thing that had happened before they made a run for the dormitories, and his forehead wrinkled at the memory of it. He still didn't have the faintest idea why she would bring it up all of a sudden, but at the same time he cursed his naivety, because he should have seen it coming.
It would be a lie to say he had not weighted his options a thousand times over since the whole thing had started. Those pressing questions had kept him awake for a few nights in a row now. He had been avoiding Galinda for several days, and she was obviously beginning to notice it. Just that afternoon, she was trying to corner him, and somehow he managed to get away without letting his meeting with Elphaba slip. He knew how much he was risking by keeping it away from her, but to be honest, it wasn't something he wanted to handle at the moment.
Only now he seemed to have to. But it still bothered him, because Elphaba's reaction was so sudden, literally out of thin air. She seemed comfortable one moment, and then the next she was all but avoiding him. And it hurt because just like that, she was back where they had started, a scared young woman who thought so little of herself. All she needed was to gain a bit of self-confidence, which she had done during this time she was with him, and now in a split second, it was all falling apart from a reason he could not quite figure out.
He grabbed a few towels from the cupboard and headed back to his bedroom. He buried his head in one, drying his hair as he opened the door absent-mindedly. He looked up, did a double take, and the towel dropped to the floor when he realized what it was he was witnessing.
Her eyes met his for a brief moment before she gasped, looking as frightened as a rabbit. She was wearing a thin dark slip, soaking wet by the way it was clinging to her. Horrified, she wrapped her arms around herself, but it didn't quite have the desired affect. Trying not to look straight at her so he wouldn't embarrass her any further, he hurried towards her and draped a blanket over her shoulders.
"Thank you," she murmured in what sounded like discomfort.
"I'm sorry, I should have knocked," he said, kicking himself for not thinking about it sooner. Things between them were delicate as it was; he had to do that to make things worse… and what was even worse, she might think he did it on purpose! "Can I get you anything? Maybe some tea?"
"No. I'm fine. Thank you," she replied, teeth chattering.
"Here, have a seat," he said, gently directed her to his bed. "I'll light a fire."
Soon the fire was burning, it was getting slightly warmer. He knew he should probably change his own clothes, but he didn't want to leave her alone. She looked terrified, probably at the thought of getting caught in his room. When their eyes met, she wrapped the blanket tighter around her, as if wishing to disappear into it.
He took in her lips, almost purple with the chill, her damp hair that was tumbling down her shoulders in tangles. She had never been more beautiful to him. He raised a hand to brush a lock of her off her forehead before he could think better of it. She kept her eyes locked with his; they looked huge in her face. He didn't dare to look away. He thought he was the one moving towards her first, but he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of anything, except for the feeling of her lips against his.
He kissed her slowly, careful not to scare her off. Her lips were cold. To his surprise, she didn't try to push him away. Her kisses were uncertain, as if she was holding back, but at some point, the hesitation melted away. The room got stifling with each frenzied kiss. He slipped the blanket off her shoulders as he gently laid her back. He could feel her hands tangling in his hair as he leaned over to kiss her more deeply. His head was reeling, but he wasn't going to stop and question. No, he'd just go with his instincts on this one. That, or wait for the slap.
When the need for air became unbearable he pulled away and started trailing light kisses along her jaw, down her throat. Her back shot off the bed as she threw her head back to give him better access. He moved the thin straps of her slip with his teeth so he could kiss her shoulders, first one, then the other. Her breath was getting raspier each time his lips made contact with her skin. His hand slid up her leg, feeling the silky material of her slip, slipping beneath is, sliding up her thigh –
She jolted up, breathless, and laid a hand against his chest. "Don't."
He pulled away from her, startled by her sudden movement, but not entirely surprised. He sort of expected her to do that much sooner. He tried to steady his breath and bring his mind back to the right track as he looked at her questionably. She seemed to be struggling to do the same thing.
"Not until Galinda knows," she breathed.
"Elphaba – "
"I'd better go," she murmured, mostly to herself, it seemed, as she climbed out of his bed. She picked up her dress and put it back on hastily, keeping her back turned to him, be it from modesty or embarrassment, he couldn't say.
"It's still damp," he remarked dumbly.
She shook her head, obviously not caring. "I just want to get out of here," she replied, tying her boots. She escaped the room before he managed to utter another protest. It was obviously futile; she wouldn't listen. A shiver went through him; the room was suddenly chilly once more. Sitting alone on his bed, his head between his hands, he sighed wearily, wondering what he had gotten himself into.
For the next few days, he was confined to his room with a cold, which saved him the need to think things over. Then when he got slightly better, the weather was so horrible that everyone was constantly seeking for shelter from the rain, hurrying from the dormitories to their lessons. Not wishing to become ill again, he had done the same. He found himself avoiding both, Elphaba for her denouncing looks, Galinda for her ongoing interrogations.
He headed back to his room after his last class. The sky was surprisingly clear from clouds, but it was still cold; he had a feeling that the storm wasn't over yet. He was distracted, pondering where he should spend his afternoon, now with the unexpected break in the rain. Just when he decided to have lunch at the café at the far end of the campus, he heard his name, and a tap of feet behind him. He turned, and cursed his bad luck. Galinda was gaining closer, and he had nowhere to hide.
"Fiyero, dearest, there you are, I've been looking all over for you!" she chimed, finally catching up with him.
"Good afternoon, Galinda," he murmured; he was hardly able to look at her, as if his face alone would turn him in.
"I haven't seen you around recently. I was worried about you," she said, genuine concern reflected from her eyes.
"Oh. I'm… around. It's just… this rain and all, you know."
"Well thank Oz it's just that," she replied, laughing nervously. "I thought you were ignoring me or something."
"Why… why would I do that?" he asked, heart pounding, wondering how the ever oblivious Galinda was so spot on with her observations this time?
"I don't know, that's how it looked like," she said, somewhat hesitantly, and gave him a closer look. It felt as if her eyes were drilling holes into him, trying to see through his pretence.
"Galinda…" he sighed. There was no way out. He had to do it. "Let's take a walk."
The farthest they went into the grove, the more uncomfortable he felt. There was something about this place he had always associated with Elphaba, as if it was 'their' place. Bringing Galinda there made him feel like a traitor. He hated himself for what he was going to do to her. He didn't want to upset her or break her heart, but it seemed inevitable.
"It's beautiful here," she commented as they crossed a small bridge. She stopped to lean against the railing, and looked down at the little river that flowed beneath it. "I didn't even know this place existed."
"I come here a lot, to think."
She turned and gave him an astounded look. "To think?" she echoed as if she misheard him. "About what?"
"You know, about school, about you, about the future."
A small gasp escaped her. Slowly, she walked towards him. "Do you see me in your future?"
This was where he realized the trap he had dropped himself into. He didn't mean it like that. But of course that was how she'd take it, if she heard her name combined with the word 'future'. He felt like kicking himself. He looked down at her, frantically trying to think of a good enough reply that wouldn't get him into deeper trouble. "I'm not sure what it is I see," he said eventually.
"Well, I see you in mine," she whispered, her cheeks darkening with sudden blush. Before he knew it, she was moving closer to him, shy yet determined. There wasn't much he could do. He kissed her back because it made more sense than pushing her away. He didn't mean to be rude; if he was going to hurt her, the least he could do was to maintain some of her dignity, and his. He tried to clear his mind, not to make comparisons, but they seemed inevitable. He remembered his first kiss with Elphaba, right there in the grove. This one was different. Something was missing, yet he couldn't quite figure out what.
A thunder boomed right over their heads, forcing them apart. He looked up just when the first drops of rain had started to fall, and wondered how he hadn't noticed the darkening sky before. Galinda shrieked, exclaiming something about her hair and outfit. He laughed; it was so much like her to worry about such vanities. And then his laughter stopped when he remembered the last time he had escaped a storm, and where it had led him to. He grabbed her hand as they ran off to find a shelter from the rain.
As he looked back by instinct, he thought he saw a flash of green by the riverside, disappearing among the trees.