Crazy Beat
Kyle's POV
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH.
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH.
Goddam optical structural illusions. You can always count on agency buildings to make you feel like an idiot and think this place is much smaller when you first see it from the outside. This place is absolutely huge – much bigger than what outside makes it seem to be. And it's not just there's two basement floors below us, but this place is indeed, practically bigger than what it looks from the outside. Stan and I, after being greeted by possibly the happiest receptionist we both have ever seen, we find ourselves being guided down this warm, bright and nicely decorated corridor. We've been walking for about a full minute now – 4 long corridors, 2 sets of stairs and an outside-inside transfer of buildings certainly does add to the stupidity I feel from expecting this place to be small. As we passed down each corridor, it seemed we were passing the individual section of orphans and adoptable children in reverse chronological order. Where at the beginning of our walk we passed by a few corridor rooms belonging to a few of the 10 to 12 year olds, we find ourselves after passing the cafeteria, the playrooms, the living rooms, the nursery and then outside, a huge park complete with all a kid's favorite things, finally on the 2nd floor where all the new-borns are kept.
We're coming up to the ante-room slash waiting room which is just before where all the young ones are kept. Though me and Stan are walking side-by-side and can only see the back of the receptionist, who's guiding us down here, we can both tell by her slight shaking that she's STILL absolutely shocked to see us both. We can both tell that she's thinking…somewhere within the region of…"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD…!"…or something like that.
Finally, the glass electronic door slides open and we enter one hell of a waiting room. No more of those really annoying plastic chairs with fake stitched cushions to supply an uncomfortable wait for hours and hours……and hello…to some kick-ass lay-back-and-relax electronic leather chairs. Whether we're getting to wait in these things because of our status I'm not sure, but hey……this is sweet!
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH.
Crazy Beat, CRAZY Crazy crazy…
"OK, sirs, if you can just…take a seat right here…and……and…one of our leading agency members will be right with you shortly."
"Thank you…" I give the receptionist a wink and she turns back around in some kind of shaking mood. As she begins to make her way back down the corridor, I could swear I heard her whisper to herself – "OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD…" again. I wonder what she's OMGing over – our looks…or our fame.
Stan's already made himself at home here – hell, he's even slipped his shoes off and curled himself up so that he's completely endulging in the comfort of this huge leather 'thing'. "Wake me up when we get called, kay?" The front of his hair slips down to his eyes just as they close.
"Fine, whatever." I smile and lay back on my chair too.
Thank God for updated magazine selections in waiting rooms like this – no more ancient 2001 magazines about how I can knit myself some socks in less than thirty minutes and no more helpful tips on how to get rid of garden weeds……COME ON! Nope, there's actually a quite recent business magazine here and on the front cover is a heading that catches my eye: 2020 100 American Richlist – Page 12 I wonder if my position of last year's 14th place has changed. And as I skim through fourteen pages and realize that they're covering all the people in their own detailed paragraphs from 100 onwards, I finally get to me and……OH MY GOD…if my new position doesn't shock me…it's the picture of myself that goes with it.
You got to get it together,
You're shooting at me.
You're just a teenage in the street.
The accompanied picture is of me standing behind a podium during one of KBSM's yearly big meeting. There I stand, behind a massive HD screen showing the virtual KBSM logo…and then there's me…They could have captured a photo when I was smiling, thinking or just looking serious like the businessman that I am. But NO, they had to take a picture of me……during my speech…with one of my arms outstretched, hand open and my mouth looking like a pipe funnel. OH CHRIST! Anyway, the detailed paragraph goes something like this:
#5 – Kyle Marsh-Broflovski – Net Worth: $28.7 Billion – Media, Arts & Design
Kyle Matthew Marsh-Broflovski has certainly made a name for himself in the past few years. If his high-rating library of media channels isn't beating all major American television rivals in viewer totals with its award-winning programming, then his highly skilled, highly ranged and highly collectable series of art works are making him one of the most youngest and well-known billionaires in the media and art community. His media company KBSM's Net Profits have increased three-fold over the past eighteen months and 99.9 percent of his artworks are being sold for six-figure sums. Looks like the graffiti artist Banksy has got a major competitor when it comes to sales of artwork. But art and designing aside, Mr. Marsh-Broflovski has managed to gain all possible rewards from the success of his media corporation and looks to gain even more success in the years to come.
Now I can have a little nap myself knowing that EVERYTHING in my life is running smoothly.
Why do I see yer' having fun?
They think you're clever 'coz you've blown up your lungs.
But I love to hear that Crazy Beat. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Gets the people are dancing on their feet. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
And I love to live in paradise. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
YEP! And what's better than making this life of ours even smoother and sweeter than to start our own happy family. I just Stan doesn't glomp me to death when we get in there, finally……whenever that may be.
I love my brothers on Saturday night, yeah!
My eyes stay shut for quite a while. Who would have thought that it'd take THIS long just for some people to tell some other people that we're here. God, it's like being a hospital – they say all that 'Oh, you MUST be here by bladybla past bla next week and not a second later'. And yet, you get here earlier than you're supposed to be here just as they expect, and you still stuck having to wait for hours on end. I can hear the digital plasma clock on the wall making that digital clicking tick every passing minute – even when it gets to the hour mark where it makes a happier ping……it does that twice……2 hours come and go, just like that.
Finally, after two hours of hazy feel of my surroundings, someone shakes me gently on my shoulder and wakes me up. "Mr. Marsh-Broflovski?" It's a woman's voice – mid-20's. Opening my eyes again, I lean over to Stan and give him a little shaking too. But it looks as if a heavy shake's needed to wake this sleepy-head up. Although, he DOES look cute when he sleeps, ha ha.
Stretching ourselves back into our usual condition, me and Stan put our shoes back on and stand back up.
"Thank you for being ever-so patient sirs."
"Ah no problem." Stan says – scratching his still half-asleep head. "The chairs were really comfy anyway, I could sit in those for days."
"Well I'm glad to hear that – at least we know we're giving our clients the best form of comfort whilst they're here……" She stretches out her hand for a hand-shake. "Hi, I'm Karen Mazdovich – I'm the head female director of the LA Adoption Agency."
I begin first with the hand-shake. "Pleased to meet you. I guess we don't need to tell you who we are huh?" I joke and Miss Mazdovich smiles.
"It's such a pleasure for such famous people like yourselves to be here – we find it an absolute honor to be helping you in this."
"No problem……though you couldn't have built this place any further away from the city could you?" Stan jokes…something I firmly agree with.
After a friendly chit-chat introduction, Karen Mazdovich guides us beyond the ante-room and into the next corridor where waiting at the end, is a security-enabled lock-door. She inputs a numeric code into the terminal, the static shielding disappears from off the door and we walk in. Karen proudly smiles and I follow suit. But Stan……well………just as I expected……he's off on THAT mood again. The door automatically slides across and closes just as me and Stan begin to take in the wonderful beauty of all these new-born babies in their incubation capsules. Row after row, column after column……
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH.
Crazy Beat, crazy beat…YEAH YEAH.
"Oh my God, LOOK KYLE…" Stan glomps me and grabs my arms. "Somewhere in this room……are our boys…OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!" Jeez, he's getting just as excited as the receptionist from before.
Karen starts browsing through the sheets she's got hold of. "So, looking through the details of your booking, you're looking for two boys, am I right?"
"Yes…" I reply – managing JUST to stop Stan's hug around me. "We don't mind whether they're twins or separate…but we're looking for two boys at the end of the day."
"OK, right this way." She guides us both down a few rows and columns to the boys section and more specifically, within the twins area near the back.
We spend a few minutes browsing through the group – even picking a few babies up to see if it 'feels' right. 15 minutes pass and neither me nor Stan have found the right pair. We've tried both separate and twinned babies…but there's been no success yet. Karen walks over a bit and starts scrambling through her sheets again as if she's desperate to find something again.
"Anything Stan?"
"Nah……darn it…who would have thought picking who yer' gunna adopt would be so difficult."
"Ummmm excuse me……sirs?"
"Yes, what is it?" Me and Stan turn to Karen who's stood by another twinned capsule which we haven't been to yet.
"Well…did you say in your booking that you didn't mind if these twins were 'physically' separate?"
"Ummmmm…yeh……born twins or just separate ones…we don't mind."
"Well……have you had a look at this couple yet……I think these might interest you."
Stan's the first to rush over to where Karen is stood. Peaking over and into the glass capsule, Stan breaks into his giddy mood again. "Oh my God…" He says in such a high-pitched cutesy voice. "Look at him……he's got……he's got black hair……just like me." Now this certainly is a curious new thing, I better go and have a look. And as soon as I go over there, my heart melts too……not by the baby Stan's staring at, but of the baby that's lying beside…
"Woah……" My face lights up just as much as Stan's. "That hair………it reminds me……of mine…"
"Well, if your hair were a bit more strawberry blonde that is…" Stan reminds me. Though babies hardly have any major thickness of hair as me and Stan do, I can certainly see a small dusting of a few flicky red-like hairs on that boy's head.
With kind permission, I open the glass capsule and lift out the baby with the strawberry blonde-red hair. But just as I lift him out and place him in my arms, he starts crying. And more bizarrely, so does the other baby in the capsule – just before Stan even has a chance to pick HIM up. "W-what did I do? I'm just holding him……is something wrong?"
"There's one thing I have to tell you about these two……ever since these two arrived here at the agency……we've been told by the LA hospital that they can't be split up. Though they're physically NOT twins and that they're in fact individuals – born from different mothers, we've learned on several occasions that when we take either one of them just a meter away from the other, they BOTH start crying. They won't stop until they're both beside each other's side."
"Awwww, that's so cute." Obviously Stan sees the positive side to this.
"That's true…" Karen continues. "But it's put many people off since the majority of couples that have been here, have only been looking for just one boy…not two. To put it in basic terms, these two MUST be adopted together…or not at all." NO…PROBLEM. I smile right back at her. "But I guess this is exactly what you were looking for, am I right?"
"Dam right……oooops, better not say anything like that in front of the children."
"Stan, they're not even one years old yet." We both laugh – once again, Stan's taking this whole parenting thing seriously……ALREADY.
"So…do we have a perfect find?"
"We have a perfect find!"
"Excellent." Karen claps her hands together. "Now then, if you'd just like to follow me this way…and we'll begin with all the necessary paperwork."
As Stan happily follows Miss Mazdovich out of the room, I look down at my now official…'son' and gently place him back down beside his…'brother'. And just like that…they stop crying…as if by magic………WOW.
2 Hours Later
Stan's POV
WOOHOO! It's done; dusted, finished and completed…I'm so fucking happy right now. And if Kyle's actions are anything to go by, he's just as happy as I am. As we wait once more in the leather-chair-filled ante-room for our copy of the adoption records and official statements, Kyle's pacing back and forth with his mobile phone pressed against his ears. He's been on that for fifteen minutes now – telling his whole family that it's finally happened and showing (well…speaking) just how happy and excited he is.
I'm on my mobile; I'm talking to the crazy den.
I'm gunna hear it for the money I've spent.
Trying to get 'em to party with me.
I even remember - it makes good sense…
I WOULD ring my family too and tell them the good news……but…we wouldn't want a room with TWO loud & happy guys showing just how much they're delighted with what's happened today.
But I love to hear that Crazy Beat. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Coz' the people are dancing on their feet. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
And I love to live in paradise. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
I love my sister and I love her tonight.
After another hour of waiting and as soon as I've finished MY go of showing just how much I'm fucking loving it……the important documents arrive and just like that……we're off and out of here. Obviously, because of the new adoption laws and legislations in force, we have to wait at least seven days before we can come back here…to finally collect our adopted children……MAN, SEVEN DAYS? I can't wait that long!
Yeah, I love to hear that Crazy Beat, (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Coz' the people are dancing ON THEIR FEET! (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
And I love to live in paradise, (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
I love the feeling that I love'em tonight!
A friendly receptionist guides us back to the front door and where the exit was/is. With a quick wave and goodbye, we head out and back into the outside open once more. Kyle's got firm grip of those important documents…and he BETTER keep tight hold, ha ha. The sun's come out again and it's beating down on us with a hot sunny glow. Kyle and I whip out our shades just as we walk around either side of the convertible and jump in. Though he despises getting his face and 'fro waved about by the passing rush of the wind, Kyle decides, since IT IS a special occasion, to have the roof off – a nice journey of sunshine and fresh-air is just what I love and fancy on our long trip back to the city and back home.
As me and Kyle strap ourselves in with the magnetic seat-belts, Kyle places the key-card into the slot near the wheel and the vehicle roars to smooth life. "Well then……happy?"
What does he think?! I grab hold of him, drag him towards me and give him one hell of a large kiss – front-row centre on the lips. As soon as I let go, he tilts back – half of his shades leaning down and revealing one of his eyes. "I'll take that as a yes then."
"You dam well can…………you've made me even happier than I could ever imagine…and as soon as we come back here a week from now I'm gunna…"
"Woah woah woah……don't forget…just like I said inside…we've got one hell of a long week of preparations. We need to paint, buy, decorate and sort out the boy's bedroom out, remember?"
"Awwww, work……"
"Hey, all work and no play for a week make Stan and Kyle's little family very very happy."
"Well…" I raise my shades onto the tips of my hair. "All play before all work and no play make Stan wanna give Kyle a very happy night…"
"Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?" He raises and arches an eyebrow and smiles.
"Believe me Kyle, MY LOVE…you can have all the loving you want in bed tonight……I PROMISE. I'm sure we can squeeze one night in before we go to work next week."
That smile on his face grows and he kick-starts the electronic gear control. "Well then, LET'S GO…"
And with that……we're off…back to the city of LA…and back home.
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Crazy Beat, crazy beat it YEAH YEAH. (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Crazy beat (Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH)
Crazy Beat…
Yeah Yeah YEAH Y-YEH!
Author's Comments: Yep, Kyle's one rich little guy isn't he - 5th richest American, not bad eh? So then, the boys have got a week to prepare for the 'home-coming' of their adopted boys - 7 days to decorate and fill a new boy's bedroom...can they do it? Find out...in the next chapter...