AN: I was pretty nervous about this chapter, because Alice and Bella are

idiots in it.

They all hate Tanya because you know...she's Tanya.

Edward isn't going to give in to Bella immediately

though he's struggling.

Anyway on with the story.

P.S. this chapter is pretty stupid, but that's only because Alice and Bella

are pretty nailed.

-I.N.

...

Chapter Three – Drunken Pixie Girl and The Other.

BPOV

"You know what, Alice, I just really like you-you-your eyesssss," I slurred.

"Ha, I know aren't they just, the coolest?"

"Yeah, give em to me!"

"No!"

"Hey, look! A jeep!"

"Jeep, Jeep!" Alice yelled.

"Shhhh, Alice! it's a Jeep!"

"Jeep, Jeep!"

Alice and I were drunk.

If you hadn't noticed.

Tyler Crowley had a massive ass party at his Dad's mansion on Stanford street.

We went there straight after school.

Party, Bella & Alice. Equals a major hang over.

"Hey, lookie, lookie, Bella, it's stopping over here!"

"Oh My God, the Jeep!"

"Jeep, Jeep!"

Alice and I were on the side walk, sitting down with half a bottle of beer's in our hands, Alice's arm was draped over my shoulder drunkenly, whilst my eyes were squinted and my finger was pointing at nothing in particular.

A muscly man, hopped out of his Jeep and started walking over to us.

"Muscle man!" Alice screamed.

All that was going through my head was – 'hot muscle man, hot muscle man.'

"Er, are you girls all right?" he asked, his eyebrows frowning, whilst he was scratching the back of his head, almost trying to figure out what to do.

He looked around and since it was ten at night, hardly no car's were around except for the occasional cab.

"Well, Mr. Hot Muscle Man, for your information-nnn, Bella and I here are,-" She made her finger wiggle to make him come closer.

"Er..."

"Just come here, Mr. Muscle Man, and you wont get hurt!" Alice screamed out of no where, and he jumped back, then quickly came closer to Alice.

Alice tilted his head so she could whisper in his ear.

"...are drunk," she whispered, then we both burst out laughing.

"Er, Yeah, now, do you girl's have anyway of getting home? or can you call your parents to pick you up?"

"AND IIIII-E-IIII, WILL. ALL-WAYS. LOVE. YOU-E-O-OOWWWWWW, WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUU! -OWWWWWWWW," Alice and I started singing together, swaying side to side while we were sitting together on the side walk.

"Okay, guess not. Jasper!" he yelled.

"Oooo, who's Jas-per?" Alice slurred.

A man, about the same height as Mr. Muscle Man, came out of the jeep and walked up to us as well.

"Day-um," Alice licked her lips. "Hi! I'm Alice! and this is my best-friend Bella!."

"Er, hey, um, Emmett? what are we doing here?"

"Well, we can't just leave them like this," he gestured a hand towards us, and we waved at them enthusiastically with huge grins, and they awkwardly waved back. "What if they get raped or some shit?"

"I guess, but, what are we going to do? throw them in the back seat and just wait for them to sober up?"

"That's exactly what were going to do, now pick up the pixie, and I'll pick up the other one."

"Excuse me, Mr. Muscle man!" Alice's arm shot up, like she was asking a question to a teacher.

"Er, yes?"

"I would just like to say that, 'Pixie' and 'The Other One' is not our names, who do you think you are Mr. Muscle man! you can't just do that, Oh My God I hate you Mr. Muscle Man I-I-,"

Then Alice burst out crying.

Then I started laughing hysterically.

Then they both exchanged looks.

"Yeah, I'll pick up the pixie," Blondie said.

...

AN HOUR LATER.

"Bella-doo," I heard a voice. "Oh, Bella-doo," There it was again.

"Ugh."

"Bella, get up!"

"Ah!, fuck, Alice. Don't fucking scream in my ear!"

"Oh, sorry, but we have a slight problem."

"What is it Alice?" I asked, not opening my eyes.

"I think I'm pregnant."

"What?!"

"Wait, wait, I mean, I don't know about you, but do you think we were raped?"

"Why would you think that, Alice?"

"Look where we are, Bella."

When Alice said that my eyes shot open, just to see nothing but black.

"Holy shit, I'm fucking blind!"

"Bella, no you're not, we're just in a dark room, and I have no clue where the door is, so, can you help me find it so I can use the toilet because I'm busting."

"Alice, how can you think about peeing at a time like this! we are kidnapped!"

"I don't know, Bella, jeeze. I guess my girlie forces are telling me that nature need's to take place."

"God, Alice, we need to be panicking right now, why aren't you panicking? start panicking for Christ sake!"

"Oh, okay, well, um...Ahhh?" Alice said sheepishly.

"Aren't you the slightest bit...scared?"

"Erm...no... are you?"

"...No, surprisingly not really." I said slowly, both of us looking ridiculously confused. "Why is that?"

"I don't know, but, I can't remember how we got here."

"Um, well, I sort of need to pee too, so let's find the door."

"Ok, but we have to have a plan."

"Okay...what type of plan, Alice?"

"Well, if we see them, we jump on their backs and try to pull out their hair."

"God, Alice, we're not thinking straight still, we shouldn't of drunken that much alcohol."

"Tell me about it."

"Ok, well, start feeling around."

"Er...that sounded really wrong."

"Ugh, whatever just look around for it."

"Right."

So Alice and I began to feel around for the door.

"Ah-hah! I found it!." Alice said triumphantly.

"Good, now hurry up and open it."

Alice, slowly -over acted- opened the door.

Her hands in-front of her, clamping together to make a gun shape, and she slowly walked through.

"The coast is clear, pee-operation on the go." She whispered.

"Alice, you're such a spaz."

"Yea-wait,what?! what-ever just hurry up or else there is going to be a yellow stain on this carpet."

Alice and I slowly walked our way down the dark hall way.

"Oh! did you hear that, Alice?" I said, grabbing her arm.

"Hear what?"

(Creaking noise)

"That!"

"Oh my god, yes!"

"Okay, Okay, when they come out, jump on their backs."

"Okay."

"Ready?" Alice nodded. "Okay, one, two three- AH!"

"Ahhhh!" Them.

"Ahhhh!" Us.

"Ahhhh!" Them.

"Ahhhh!" Us.

"Okay, you sick kidnappers, which one is the father of my baby?" Alice asked.

"Um, what baby?" A male's voice asked.

"The baby you forced on me."

"We didn't give you any baby."

"Well, it's not here now but it will be."

"Why?"

"Because one of you's gave it to me! sheesh."

"What the fuck is this woman talking about, Jasper?"

"This 'woman' has a name, and it's A-lice. You bozos."

"Whatever, Alice. Jasper, can you go turn on the light's, I can't see a thing."

"Um, I sort of can't, I have a hysterical girl, clinging to my back and trying to yank out my hair."

"You can stop now, Bella."

"Oh, right. Sorry."

The lights turned on, and everything was white for a while till my eyes adjusted to the room.

"Hey, I know who you are! you're Mr. Muscle Man!" Alice said, happily.

"Glad you remember, now can both of you's get off from our backs, please?"

"Right, Right." We both mumbled and jumped off from them.

We all looked around awkwardly till Alice asked-

"So, I'm not pregnant?"

"Well, we're not the father," Mr. Muscle Man said.

"Oh, thank God, Mr. Muscle Man." Alice said, taking deep breaths and holding on to his arm.

"My name isn't 'Mr. Muscle Man' It's Emmett."

"Sure, Sure, Mr. Muscle Man," Alice said, waving him off. "Ok, now, what the hell are we doing here?" she yelled, putting her hands on her hips.

"Well, what were you guy's doing drunk, on the side walk?" Blondie asked.

"It's none of your business, Blondie," I said.

Mr. M&M, snickered, and Blondie rolled his eyes.

"Well, I'm guessing you guy's were drunk, and under age," Blondie said matter-of-factly.

"How do you know we're under age, stalkers?" Alice accused them.

"You kept on mumbling to your friend here that you were going to have a 'sweet eighteenth' birthday party next year. And that you were going to drag her to the shops, then your friend here started crying," M&M said.

"It's Bella," I corrected, M&M.

"Okay, well, Bella and Alice, I'm Jasper and this is Emmett, now, do you have your parent's number's so they can come and pick you up?"

"Blondie, M&M," I said nodding towards the both of them, they both rolled their eyes. "We are not calling our parents, my dad is the police chief here and if he found out I would be in so much shit, then you guy's would be too for taking us while we were intoxicated."

"Well, then, what were you guy's thinking of doing then?" Blondie asked.

"Umm, Maybe, Bella and I could crash here till tomorrow?" Alice asked.

"Ha! no way, Pixie," M&M said.

"Oh, come on, please Mr. M&M, we'll be gone by tomorrow," I begged.

Blondie sighed then looked over at M&M.

"Ugh, whatever, but you's have to be gone by tomorrow, I don't want to explain to my girlfriend why I have two seventeen year olds half dressed in my house," M&M said.

"Sure, Sure," Alice said.

RING. RING.

Blondie's phone rang.

"Oh, wait one sec, It's Edward." Blondie said.

"Hey, Ed," Blondie said.

"Hey, Eddie!" M&M yelled.

"Yes, we were on our way there, but Emmett and I found two really drunk seventeen year old girl's on the side walk, Emmett didn't want them to get raped and then they past out, so we brought them back to ours, and they ended up jumping on our back's and taking chunks of our hair out, so you know, nothing really that interesting,"

Blondie said, though glared at us.

Obviously he was being sarcastic.

Alice and I shrugged.

"Could happen to anybody," Alice said, sticking her nose up in the air.

"Um, why would you know them? I don't know... Hold on, I'll ask," Blondie said.

"Hey, do you's, by any chance, go to St. Bridget's Senior High School?"

"Yes."

Blondie nodded then started talking on the phone again.

"...They said their names were, Alice and Bella they were-,"

All of a sudden this loud roaring came from the other side of the phone.

I looked at Blondie. Blondie looked at Alice. Alice looked at me. M&M looked at Blondie.

And for a twinge of a second I felt like I was in a 'Batman Movie'

"Edward, Calm down...what? No, no, we can take care of them, Edward? Edward? just, no just stay with Tanya, Edward? Hello? Hello? shit." Blondie cursed.

"Wait, wait, wait, was that Edward? As in Edward Cullen? As in my teacher Mr. Cullen?" I asked, starting to panic.

"Yeah, and he's coming here now, pissed off like hell, so I suggest you start running."

"Oh shit, this can not be fucking happening! How the hell do you's know him?" I yelled.

"Well, Em and I here, have been best friend's with him since ninth grade."

"God, out of everyone who had to pick us up, they just had to be Mr. Cullen's best-friends," I said, closing my eyes and pinching my forehead.

"Oh My God," I moaned. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Oh, Hell no! Jasper! Quick take her to the bathroom!"

"No way man, you take her!"

"There's no fucking way I'm going to get vomit all over me, yo-,"

"Oh, for the love of Jesus, will you both just shut up! I wasn't being serious!" I yelled.

"I am though," then Alice threw up in a pot plants pot.

"Ew," we all cringed at the same time.

"Ugh, shit, I need a- a- ," Alice tried to explain.

Jasper, knowing that Alice was trying to ask for a toilet to throw up in, quickly towed her to the bathroom, and M&M and I both scrunched up our noses in disgust while we heard her throw up her gut's in the toilet bowl.

"He takes her to the bathroom," I grumbled. M&M chuckled.

"So...your Edward's student, eh?" Muscle Man asked.

"Yeah," I smiled sheepishly. "Are you the same age as Mr. Cullen?"

"Yep, twenty two and loving it," M&M smiled.

"And is Blondie twenty two, too?"

"Yeah, though he's a day older then me. Won't let me forget that fact either."

"Life must be terrible for you then."

"Yes, yes it is."

M&M grinned and I grinned back.

Everything was going fine until my grin was wiped away when I heard the screeching of tires then the loud banging of a car-door being slammed shut.

"Shit," I said under my breath, instantly jumping behind the couch and bringing my finger over my mouth to tell M&M to be quite.

M&M rolled his eyes.

Mr. Cullen busted the door open and then yelled-

"Where is she?!"

"Well, hi to you to, Eddie," M&M laughed, though I could tell that there was a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"Emmett, Jasper just called me now, so don't act like you don't know where Bella is," Mr. Cullen growled.

I might of gotten away with it until I saw a white chubby cat sitting beside me.

I prayed to god that I wouldn't sneeze since I'm allergic.

No such luck.

"Ah-choo!"

There was silence and I smashed my eyes shut.

Hoping that if I closed them hard enough a hole would appear out of no where and I would jump in it.

Then, the couch was pushed aside and I was yanked up by my wrist by a large hand.

"Bella, how can you be so stupid?!" Mr. Cullen yelled.

"Mr-"

"What do you think you were doing? huh? on a fucking side walk?! any one could have kidnapped you."

"Well, I can see that now, and for your information-,"

"I can't believe you could do such a stupid, stupid thing Bella. And I came speeding here straight from a restaurant I was suppose to be having dinner at with Tanya, Emmett and Jasper, then-,"

"You didn't have to come here, Mr. Cullen," I cut through.

"What?"

"Why are you here, Mr. Cullen?"

"Because, you're here, because-,"

"You could of stayed with Tanya, and you could have had an excellent steak, though you're not, because you came here instead, because I'm here, and Emmett and Jasper could have taken care of us perfectly fine without your help," I told him matter-of-factly. "I can bet a million dollars that there has been tone's of other students that have gotten drunk and pissed out of their brains, and have sung on side walks, but you didn't come all the way from a really nice restaurant, especially with your girlfriend, to go save them, now did you?" He knew I was right.

"So now I'm asking, why are you here, Mr. Cullen, when you can be there, with Tanya?"

And I knew he knew the meaning behind my words.

For once, Mr. Cullen was speechless.

"Of course, there's the obvious, that Tanya is so damn boring that you would take any excuse to get out of her presence, I mean right now when I just said her name and talking about her now you were -are- staring at my boobs," I said smugly.

His eyes shot up to my face and he looked slightly panicked.

"Was I?"

"You were, dude," M&M said from behind us. "And that's sort of weird, since she's your student and all, but I'll let you pass this time because I found myself staring too," M&M took a chug of his beer. Which apparently came out of no-where.

"I know," I said looking over Mr. Cullens shoulder to glare at Emmett.

"Sorry, Bella, just don't tell Rosalie," M&M said sheepishly.

I rolled my eyes.

I looked back at Mr. Cullen and he was looking at me.

"Come on, Bella, I'll take you home," Mr. Cullen said quietly, tugging at my wrist which I now just realised he was holding on to for the whole time.

I tugged back, as much as I wanted to go, I couldn't.

"I can't leave Alice like this, she's spewing her lunch out in M&M's toilet."

"M&M?"

"Muscle Man, aka your best friend Emmett over there," I pointed over at Emmett and he waved at us with a huge grin.

"You said my name!" he said happily.

"Yes I did, Mr. Muscle Man," I laughed and his face frowned.

"Come on, twinky," he said sulkily and pulled the big white cat in to his arms and he stormed off in to a bed room.

"Where's Jasper?"

"Oh, Blondie's in the bathroom, helping Alice, who is supposedly passed out now," I shivered.

Edward chuckled while he shook his head.

"You're so crazy sometimes, Bella," Edward told me.

"Yeah, it's called having fun, Mr. Cullen," his smile faded and his face kind of fell when I said 'Mr. Cullen'.

He sighed and closed his eyes, and then I realised he was still holding on to my wrist.

He squeezed it slightly, then slowly let it go.

"You're right," Mr. Cullen said. "I shouldn't be here."

"No, no, no," I said quickly. "I didn't mean it like that."

"It doesn't matter anyway," he muttered. "I have to get back to, Tanya."

I knew he wanted to stay here, with me, because I mean, who want's to stay with Tanya for the night? Who the hell wants to stay with, Tanya, period?

But his jaw tightened and he shook his head.

"Right, you have to go home to T.B, that must be fun," I said sarcastically.

"You know how you're getting to school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, either M&M or Blondie are going to drop us off at home tomorrow."

He sort of barked a laugh, and rolled his eyes.

Though he then quickly cleared his throat and his poker face came back on.

"Well, then, I'll see you in class tomorrow, Miss Swan," He waved as he walked to the door.

"Yep," I said back with a grin. "Cya...Edward," He looked at me for a second longer then was out the door.

Already I knew that his undoing was going to come, fast, and soon.

Very soon.