Chapter XX
Change and Replay

I was ready. I'd been through everything I could bear and had lost enough to know I couldn't stand to lose anything else. I would secure my future with Edward the only way that promised an eternity of love. I was still frightened by what I would wake up to in three days time, whether I'd still be me, but I wouldn't wait another day.

I heard a leaf crackle behind me, and assuming it was Edward, I turned. It was Jasper.

He kneeled down next to me and then sat back with his arms around his knees as he'd done so often on the island. We looked into each others eyes.

"How is Emmett?" I asked.

"He's devastated, but he's Emmett. I think he'll pull through, but for a long time he may be a very different person. He's lost his guiding angel. He just needs to figure out where to go now." Jasper replied.

I sighed, poor Emmett. I could only guess at how much pain he was in.

"Bella, I've come to ask a favor." Jasper broke through my thoughts. I couldn't imagine what Jasper might want, but after our experience of being abducted, and his care of me, I didn't think I'd deny him much. I raisedan eyebrow at him, "Yes?" I invited.

"I want to help Edward change you." He said.

My eyes widened in shock, and my jaw dropped. I turned my head to face him a little more directly. "Why?" I questioned.

"Well, firstly, I want to prove I can do it." He looked down, his expression mildly embarrassed, "also, I want to be a part of changing you. I think it will make me feel more a part of this family than I have before now."

I looked into Jasper's eyes considering. I had to agree with his ideas. Having his venom along with Edward's in my veins would close the gap in the blood/venom relation to the rest of the family. Also, if he could manage to pull away after biting me, it would in effect prove to everyone, including himself that he was stronger than anyone believed. It didn't really change the fact that Edward would still be changing me. "Sure Jasper, I'm fine with that."

Edward came up on my other side just at that moment. He sat beside me and took my hand again. Jasper was looking nervously at Edward. Edward's face changed as he looked at his brother, and he looked suddenly at me. Anger on his face.

"Jasper gave his reason's Edward, and I happen to agree with him. I trust him, I know he'll be fine." I said defiantly.

Edward looked angry for a moment more, then sighed resignedly. "When?"

Smiling, I replied, "I think now."

Jasper and Edward looked at each other, twin looks of surprise on their faces. Carlisle, Esme and Alice appeared beside us. Edward moved to kneel next to my right arm, and Jasper remained by my left. Edward looked down at me, his brow rigidly furrowed. "Are you sure, Bella?" His voice never as velvety as it was then. I nodded my head, and softly answered yes. He sighed again, and said, "I love you."

I beamed at him, "You'd better." both Edward and Jasper laughed. My family chuckled, and I looked at them. Carlisle and Esme each had love in their eyes, Alice too, but I could also see excitement and anticipation as well. Emmett still hadn't returned.

I looked at Jasper, "Thank you, for everything. You've been wonderful to me brother, more than a brother. I have complete trust in you." He grinned back at me.

I turned back to Edward, "I'm ready." I sighed deeply. As Edward and Jasper lifted my wrists to their lips I looked at Edward again, "Hey!" He froze, and looked questioningly at me. "I love you too...forever." I said, smiling.

Edward grinned and leaned forward. Edward's face was concerned, Jasper's determined. The two of them bit into my wrists at the exact same time, Jasper almost immediately stood back up his eyes full of pride in himself. Edward stood just a short second after, I gasped at the sudden pain. They quickly bit each of my ankles and Edward walked back to my head.

I began to feel the burning, as I had when James had bitten me. My veins were on fire, only this time, instead of just my hand, both arms flamed. As I began to feel as though I was boiling from inside, I screamed. Edward's terrified voice called out to Carlisle. I barely felt the puncture as Carlisle gave me the morphine, I was in so much pain. I screamed again, the burning never ceased and I was unable to escape it.

"Edward! Edward, I can't, it's burning. No! Stop the burning, please." I screamed. Over my screams I could hear Edward's anguished please to his Father.

"I'm sorry Edward, I've given her the morphine. There's nothing more we can do but wait." he said.

Edward's voice was frantic, "I don't know how long I can take her pain." I heard Carlisle say something back, but the morphine addled my brain, I couldn't comprehend what was said. Minutes, hours, days passed. I couldn't be certain of the time because there was no change in the continual burning to compare it to. I burned, I screamed, time passed. That was all I knew. I did notice in a detached way that my voice finally became hoarse. My screams sounded strangled.

A new burn eventually exploded through both of my legs. I screamed out for Edward again, but it was Jasper who answered. "Shhh, shhhh Bella. He'll be back soon. I'm with you for now." His familiar voice reassured me, but my body arched at that moment, I screamed again. Jasper laid his hands on my shoulders. "Easy Bella." The pain returned, my awareness did not.

When my awareness finally did return, I felt I was listening to the room around me through head phones, everything amplified. I could see light filter through my eyelids and it was a ruby colored prism refracted by the delicate veins in my lids. I opened my eyes and sat up. Jasper and Edward stood on either side of me. I looked around myself, the world was new, and so was I.

I was helping my family pack, the Quileute's had been especially diligent in making certain we respected the three month time limit Jacob had set. They'd left us alone until after my and Edward's wedding, which despite all my reservations had turned out beautiful. The pack began asking us our plans soon afterwards.

At least Seth did. He recovered from his injuries soon after the battle with the Volturi and had, as promised, been the sole representative of the pack at our wedding.

After the wedding he became the unhappy liaison, but delighted friend to the family. Carlisle, like Edward , had come to respect Seth as a friend and confidant. Seth's youth and exuberance amused us all. He was inconsolable over losing the two people he loved, and looked up to most in the world, but when Leah had died, he'd been thrust into the position of responsiblity for his family, now consisting of just him, and his Mom.

He'd also taken a lot of responsibility for Billy Black, now that Jake was gone. Billy spent a lot of time at the Clearwater's, finding common ground in loss. Another frequent visitor was my Dad, Charlie. The only time I'd allowed him to see me was at the wedding. I felt it would be common enough for a girl to undergo a "change for the beautiful" on such an occasion, and would soften his shock. Contacts were an easy fix, but the rest of my new appearance was less fixable. Fortunately, it was also less definable.

We broke the news of our move to the guests during the wedding reception, and Charlie left unhappy, and deflated, which was my only regret.

Our news at the reception propelled Seth to begin joining us at the house almost every day. Since Jake had rescinded the treaty, Sam couldn't really forbid Seth from coming.

It was during one of Seth's visits that I finally learned what had happened that day; the day of the battle that was responsible for so much loss.

Seth explained to me about how Jacob and Sam had taken flight into the forest in the same direction, while Seth had run off a different way. When he realized they were split up, he cut back and ran to meet up with them, where Jacob said they had stopped. Just as Seth caught up with them, Jane, with four guards in tow, had stepped out. Seth had launched himself at Jane as the guards had taken off after Sam and Jacob. Jane had jumped onto Seth's back and began bashing him with her tiny hands, crushing his shoulder and several ribs. Seth had fallen to the ground and Jane had jumped off him.

It was when Jane turned around to start afresh that Edward and I arrived, effectively saving Seth's life. Edward had checked Seth's body to be sure he hadn't been bitten when they'd heard my spine snap against the tree and my scream. I had no memory of screaming, but wasn't surprised to hear I had.

Edward was upstairs while Seth said this, but Seth still leaned in close, as if he could be secretive around a family with supernatural hearing. I was fortunately repelled by the idea of killing generally, but more importantly about killing wolves, so was fine with Seth's closeness.

"Aw man Bella, when Edward turned on Jane, he looked so terrifying even my fur stood on end. I think that little vampy-witch realized her mistake one moment too late. Edward launched himself at her feet first, his body curled upward, he grabbed her hands, which she was holding out to protect herself, ha! That didn't work out. When his feet hit her chest, Edward pulled back on her arms. There were twin popping sounds when her arms ripped off, and the little vampire was screaming. That woke me up, I limped over and started stomping and shredding her body as she hit the ground. It was great! Just like when Edward and I took care of Victoria and that creepy kid, we had her burning in seconds."

Seth was grinning from ear to ear, but my memory of the battle was still a little too clear to allow me to think of it in any good light, and made my expression bleak. Seth hastily rearranged his face when he noticed my expression.

"The guards chased Jake," Seth winced slightly as he said his lost pack brother's name, "and Sam for awhile, they might have outrun them, if they hadn't come across four others who were attacking Leah. Jake jumped in and tried to pull her out, but she'd already been bitten, dozens of times. Did you know vampire venom is poison to us?" Seth suddenly asked. I nodded.

"Well, he knew, Jake I mean. Jacob never could ignore a fight though. All eight of the guard attacked him. He was outnumbered and Sam decided to go work on something he could do something about."

Seth's expression told me he wasn't pleased by Sam's response, and I couldn't help but agree with him.

"So what happened to the guard?" I asked. "Most of us are still here, so I'm assuming we won, but there were like twenty guards."

Seth frowned, "It was strange Bella, I'm not sure exactly what happened, but from what I've heard within the pack, your brother - the big one - went berserk when he discovered the beautiful blonde burning. She was his wife?" Seth asked. I nodded, and heard the sound of Emmett running out and away from the house. Seth heard him too, and his face fell. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend him." I shook my head, "Don't worry Seth, Emmett's been staying away from the house a lot these days. He's been a little better since Alice and I went up and packed all of Ro-" I still couldn't say her name without it hurting, "her things; their photos, and things she'd bought for him. We can't save him from every memory though."

Seth still looked stricken, I tried to get him back on the subject to distract him, "So you said Emmett went berserk? What did that mean?"

It worked, Seth's eyes lit up enough that I thought it was probably a good thing that we were moving, or Emmett and Edward might very well have replaced Jacob and Leah in Seth's idolizing mind. I smiled at the thought which seemed to encourage Seth. "Oh yeah, he went cuh-razy. He flew through the forest like some dark spirit of retribution, and before we knew it, we had a huge pile of used vampire parts." I heard Edward and Jasper chuckling upstairs. I laughed too, continuing to wrap the dishes and cups Esme had brought me to pack. It was good to hear the laughter, there had been little of it in the house lately.

Later that evening, when Emmett returned, he passed through the living room going to the stairs. His face was a serious and drawn mask. Edward loudly cleared his throat, getting everyone's attention, we were all watching the news. "Oh look, the dark spirit of retribution has finally returned home."

Everyone laughed, and I looked at Emmett, worried he might be angry, but he just stood there with a confused look on his face, one eyebrow raised in question, and the hope of a smirk lifting once corner of his mouth. As Emmett shook his head, turned and ascended the stairs, I began to hope for the first time that Emmett might make it after all.