"Well first we need to know who the hell is on the other side before we can prepare anything so let's make a list." Harry stated as he took out a piece of parchment and a quill.
"Well first of we know that You-Know-Who is on that side mate." Ron told Harry, who in turn jotted it down.
"Then there will be Orochimaru, Kabuto, and the Sound Village. Then there is also the Akatsuki, and Mizuki" said Jiraiya.
"Then there is of course the Espada, Aizen Souske, Gin Ichimaru, Tousen, and the hollows," stated Rukia, with a crudely drawn cartoon of rabbits.
"The Hunters will be there," Rio stated.
"Don't forget Envy, Dante, Gluttony, Scar, Wrath, Sloth, and The Fuhrer," stated Mustang smugly.
"Even when explaining things he has an ego, sheesh!" exclaimed a rather annoyed Uruyu.
"Yeah, it's like a not duck-butt haired, better looking version of Sasuke," stated Ino.
"Hey! I thought you liked me, so then why are you insulting me?" Sasuke complained
"Because you are a traitor to Konoha as far as I am concerned. My crush for you died out long ago, as did Sakura's." Ino said acidly.
"Look you can argue about your love life later, but we need to assess the situation right now, because you can make sure that Voldemort is wasting no time whatsoever in making his plans to attack us!" Harry screamed as he got a particularly nasty burst of pain in his scar.
"Fine so we know who will more than likely be on which side, now let's analyze the weapons they have, or powers o.k.?" Kat told the group.
"Orochimaru will have a variety of jutsus at his disposal, the sound ninjas will attack using wave based attacks, the Akatsuki will go for Naruto and use attacks depending on where they are from, Itachi will probably use Genjutsu, and Mizuki will go for Naruto or Iruka using enhancement pills." Kakashi stated rather lazily as he pulled away from the book he had so avidly been reading moments before.
"Aizen will probably have an army of Menos Grandes, along with the Espada and don't forget 2 captain level Soul reapers." Urahara said rather lazily as well.
"The Hunters are strategist, they have no super powers, but they do have a high capacity for planning, so they will provide obstacles that require thinking to get through them," stated Eyes as he stared off into the distance.
"The Homunculi will have powers individual to them selves, such as shape shifting eating, acidity etc. And Scar has the power to blow things up." Hughes said, while cuddling a picture of his three year old.
"And Voldemort has a variety of dark creatures at his disposal, everything from Dementors to Vampires, and his army of Death Eaters, as well as a vast knowledge of the Dark Arts," said Dumbledore as he appeared in the room out of no where.
"Dumbledore! We didn't hear you enter!" Harry and Kat exclaimed surprised.
"Yes well I had some issues to deal with before I came to the meeting that could not wait. Ah, I see you showed Mr.Elric our Sorcerer's stone."
"Yes, he was pure enough to get through the test, as was his brother, plus for the upcoming war that is about to take place we need them at their fullest condition," Kat told Dumbledore as though giving a military report.
"Sir, excuse but I happened to notice that you are injured." Orehime said shyly.
"Yes well I doubt you could do anything about it girl." Snape stated rather acidly at Orehime.
"Darling, I am afraid he is right. My hand has been like that for over a year." Dumbledore stated in a much kinder tone.
Orehime got up from Ichigo's side and walked over to Dumbledore, a look of fierce concentration on her face. She took a deep breath and said "Shield of the heavenly duo," at that moment 2 fairies flew out of her hair clip and made a barrier around Dumbledore's hand, she then made a triangle shape with her hands and said, "I reject!"
The crippled hand started to heal with an amazing speed, it was as though the time itself was going back only in that barrier, taking back any damage that hand happened to its host.
"Amazing! Absolutely amazing, it was as though my hand had never been injured!" Dumbledore exclaimed, obviously pleased.
"You must have used some dark magic to heal that arm, because I used my strongest potions and they had no effect on that arm!" Snape snarled at Orehime. He made a move towards her, and in the blink of an eye, all of the Soul Reapers were around him, including Uruyu.
"Orehime's power is not evil magic, it is what we know as pure event rejection, it creates a barrier around a specified area and rejects the existence of the very object." Urahara explained to the room a small smile playing on his face.
"If you touch Orehime again we will make sure that you touch nothing else ever again!" Ichigo stated.
"O. k. No need to be so violent!" stated Dumbledore casually, as though he was discussing socks over tea.
"Well, since we know who might be on the other side, then we can safely assume that they know our weaknesses too." Shikamaru said as he stared at the Blade children, who were apparently thinking along the same lines.
"No worries, dude! They don't stand a chance! We will defeat them! Remember it is when a person truly cares for someone that they become genuinely strong." Naruto told Shikamaru, as he remembered what Haku had once told them.
"Now we have to figure out where they are staying." Said Hermione.
"Well at Hogwarts of course!" said Harry, Kat, and Dumbledore at the same time.
"Kakashi can stay as the Shinobi teacher, Urahara as the Shinigami professor, Mustang as the alchemy professor, and the older ones can be the assistant for the others." said Dumbledore. "The rest will be sorted and placed into Houses, where they will take the classes that pertain to them."
"Wait! Professor Dumbledore not all of us are capable of doing what others can do, for example us wizards and witches can't create shadow clones!" Hermione exclaimed.
"Well you will find that some of us can. See when the dimension collided, some of us gained powers," Kat said, "for example, all of the newcomers have the power to do magic, some of us will have Shinigami powers, others will have, Shinobi powers, others will have alchemy, and some might have all. So before we sort you into houses we will figure out who has which powers."
"Urahara will check for extremely high spirit pressures, Kakashi will check for chakra signatures, and Edward will check for Alchemic reactions, guys if you could please start." Harry said.
Urahara was the first to start. He approached the middle of the classroom and said that he needed them all to relax, that if he felt spirit pressure worthy of being a soul reaper that he would tap that person.
He first approached Naruto, and concentrated on Naruto only. At first he only felt a small amount but it steadily grew so that Naruto's spirit pressure was so strong that it made Urahara weak, he tapped Naruto and went on, at the end the list of soon to become soul reapers were:
Naruto
Kat
Harry
Edward
Alphonse
Kakashi
Jiraiya
Shikamaru
Gaara
Hinata
Shino
Sasuke
Eyes
Next came Kakashi, the list to become Shinobi was:
Harry
Kat
Ron
Ayumu
Ed
Al
Mustang
Hiyono
Kousuke
Mustang's list was:
Naruto
Rio
Sakura
Shikamaru
Hermione
Kat
Harry.
At last they had finished. Everyone immediately wanted to know what house they were in, but before that could happen; Kat had an announcement to make.
"Ummmmmmm… before we start there is one more person that has to be introduced, well I'm not sure how y'all will take this so I'll just have to bring him on out. Here is Itachi Uchiha."
At that moment nobody spoke, nobody moved, it was as if time had frozen still as the Uchiha stepped out of a closet that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. In that instant several things happened, all the ninjas attacked Itachi, Kat knocked them all back, and Itachi cried.
"What the fuck is that fucker doing here? Shit!" Sasuke exclaimed rather angrily. "He killed my family and then he has the fucking decency to show up here!!"
"You brought him here? Does the fact that he has been trying to catch me so he barbeque my Nine Tails mean nothing to you!? You basically just put me on a golden platter, no, a grill for him, jeez, just throw some seasoning and a little barbeque sauce and I'm good to go!" Naruto exclaimed rather insulted, and hungrily since the extended food metaphor did sound quite delicious.
"Naruto, don't describe your self in such a succulent and exquisite way, I mean, come on, I haven't even had breakfast yet, that's like, unconstitutional or something, right? I mean, it's like torture, or whatever." Kat said as she imagined a plate full of barbeque.
"Look, all I want to know is why an S class criminal is in here and I haven't either killed him or captured him." Kakashi said as he looked up from his book for a second time in the day.
"Itachi is here as my guest Kakashi, and he is not an S class criminal, he does not want to barbeque Naruto, as yummy as that may sound, and he didn't kill his family because he wanted to, but because he was ordered." Everyone stopped talking once again.
"He was ordered? Don't give me that bullshit! He killed them because he wanted to measure his strength, nothing else! I was there, he told me!" Sasuke exclaimed, Sharingan ablaze.
"You idiot, don't you ever think? If he had wanted to just kill everyone to just measure his strength then he would've just killed everyone, why would he want to leave someone to hunt him down? He was ordered as the head of the ANBU black ops to kill all Uchiha because they were planning a coup de grace, and to make this clear, the Third Hokage had already tried to negotiate with them, but they wouldn't listen. Itachi was, is, a man who hates conflict, he did what he was told, murder a few, or watch many more die. He did not want the leaf village to be thrown into a world of chaos so he did the right thing, but he couldn't kill his little brother, he loved him to much. So instead he knocked him out, took him to the hospital, and spoke with the Third, he asked that no one tell you the truth, and that no one try to kill you, so when the Third died he had to come to Konoha to make sure that no one tried to kill you, and as for The Akatsuki, he joined to keep an eye on the leader nothing else, why else would he have given Naruto the power of the Sharingan if not to protect himself?" Kat finished explaining, and in the background silent tears rolled of his cheeks.
"He lies! You all lie! I know him better than any of you! He killed them to measure his strength, and he didn't give Naruto the power of the Sharingan!" Sasuke yelled, struggling to maintain this conversation on a plane that he knew.
"Idiot, listen for once in your life. Itachi is a good man. He took dishonor in payment of honor; he took hatred in payment of love! He has been trying, even now to protect all of you! Does no one believe me? Look at him, he weeps! A man with an evil heart is not capable of tears for tears are the embodiment of innocence! This man is as innocent as any here!" Dumbledore spoke with such a conviction that everyone stood silent.
"I believe you, and Itachi, I'm sorry." Naruto walked forward with his hand outstretched and shook hands with Itachi.
"Me too." Sakura said as she too walked forward.
Slowly every Konoha ninja approached him, and shook his hand, all except for one.
"Sasuke, are you going to sulk?" Kat asked.
"It's true isn't it? I remember now, that day, when I threw the kunai at him he turned, just before I passed out, and I saw a tear stream down his cheek. I thought that I had imagined everything. But what now? My whole life has been a farce, I no longer deserve anything, and I am tied down to Orochimaru, for a revenge that wasn't necessary. Itachi I believe her, but it will take me a while to forgive you, because ninja who don't follow the rules are trash but those who abandon their comrades are worse than trash. And Itachi you are worse than trash, you are scum and that image won't disappear in a day or two, it took me 8 years to build up that image, it'll take me twice as long to tear it down." Sasuke looked at the floor, his voice bitter and full of hate.
"Calm down drama queen. Jeez. And the award for best soap opera actor is Sasuke Uchiha, for the captivating speech that made us all gag, "I can't forgive you." Now everyone lets give a round of applause." Kat said her southern accent now booming.
Itachi stood still as he was told that he was going to be placed in whatever group pertained to him. He was immediately placed in the soul reaper group.
"Well now that the drama is over shall we begin with the sorting?" Harry stood with a battered hat next to a stool, he placed it down walked to a chair and looked at it as though it was going to talk, which it did.
"A thousand years ago,
Hogwarts barely started,
Four noble wizards and witches decided they should found it,
To teach magic was their choice,
They lined up young ones and tested all their powers,
It all worked, but one problem they encountered,
How to choose where they went, for each founder wanted different qualities
Gryffindor said "I'll take those brave and bold!"
Slytherin said "Cunning and sly are those that I want!"
Ravenclaw said "Give me those of sharpest mind and I shall hone their wit."
Hufflepuff said "Give all the rest to me, and I'll treat them all the same."
So off the head of Gryffindor I came, and with tricky magic the Sorting Hat I became,
My job to sort, to separate,
I wonder if it's right to divide, instead of unite,
In this time of discord and war I make a choice, I will divide no more,
Instead I now give a warning, and heed it well, United we stand, Divide we fall,
Those of dark hearts, united they are by their greed and vengeance
Separated we are by our prejudice
So see past that, past Houses and Villages, past Court Guards and Ryoka,
And when we do then we will truly be unstoppable."
Everyone stared at the hat, in all of Hogwart's history it had never denied to sort, even when it gave cryptic warnings it never denied to sort.
"Yeah, so, ummm, I guess that means that they will have to choose their own house?" Ron asked confused.
"No, you heard the hat, and it's about time someone listened to it." Harry said as he picked up the Sorting Hat.
"There is a tower on the east side of the castle that no one uses; we will turn this into a tower for those that want to follow the sorting hat's advice, there will be no houses just, unity, for now they can stay in the Gryffindor house, then we will move into the East Tower." Kat finished saying, then added an afterthought "Is there anyone who disagrees?"
Slowly, Kanone stood up and looked at her, and said in deep southern drawl "I disagree. I do not want to be stuck with that wretched Narumi; I absolutely refuse to be stuck with all you goody two shoes, I'll be leaving now." He stood up and walked towards the entrance, but was blockaded by Kat.
"Where the hell do you think you are going?" Kat said her southern accent now booming. "Off to tell all your friends what you heard, well I'll just have to stop you!"
"You stop me? What are you going to do, point your stick at me?" he then made the fatal (j/k) mistake of trying to walk right past her.
At that moment she tied him up with the ropes that shot out of her wand. "I thought you were going somewhere, but before you do, I'll erase your memory except for one thing, tell them all that I know who they are and what they fear, that I will again remind them why they once feared the dark. Obliviate!" A puff of smoke appeared out of her wand and a glazed look came over. "There now that is all he will remember!"
She then did some trick with her wand and he disappeared. Everyone stood up and walked out of the Room of Requirements, Naruto's words still ringing in their ears.