A/N: So anyway I'm back with a new chapter! Yay. Not. Anyway read and enjoy but first:

XrazorxpiesX- sorry to gross you out, but what is drinking piss compared to eating human meat pies, hm? LoL

Falling Stardust- How did you know I love chocolates and roses? You're too good. I thank you. Weird is a big complement to me.

LazyCatfish27- Ah excellent question. And because you asked I will answer in the next chapter!

NelliethePieAngel- lol that funny with the pineapple juice, I'll have to try it one day! And thank you for the lovely review. I glad you enjoyed it.

ByTheBeautifulSea- I am so happy that you enjoyed it, love! And as you can see I am (finally) continuing. Unfortunately there are no pirate/Sweeney crossovers in this chappie sorry. Thank you for the review and I'm happy that I made you laugh.

Winnywriter- Why thank you for the comment. Yeah I know the Pirate/Sweeney thing is a little over done and predictable but I'm glad you found it funny!

Xblackxtearsxofxlovexandxhatex- sorry if you didn't understand it, love. Maybe you'll like this chapter more?

Snowseal135- I'm so happy that you liked it! Thanks for reviewing!

And of course thank you to all the other people who also read BUT DID NOT REVIEW…

Cause if you review I can thank you kinda sorta personally!

Disclaimer: I still don't own Sweeney Todd or anything for that matter. But I do own the original London cast CD. Angela Lansbury kicks butt.

By the way: You might understand this chapter more if you go watch the Broadway musical on youtube. This part is called "Kiss Me"…

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Kiss Me

Inside Judge Turpin's home the second time was much nicer than his first experience, thought Anthony, especially since this the Judge wasn't there to show him his dirty books and he actually is getting to see Johanna.

She was pretty.

She was even prettier now that he could see close up, rather than having to be a stalker and wait outside her window…

But then when she threw the key to her house to him, he was filled with joy. And even better was that he was going to be able to free his beautiful Johanna for Mr Todd said that he may take her to his shop until he was able to bring her somewhere safe! With such happy news, why did his love look so…skeptical?

Johanna sat staring at the strange boy she allowed to enter her house. Why did she throw that key to him? Oh, right, he was cute, about her age, and might be able to get her away from the wack job she had for a father.

The wack job that wanted to (gag) marry her.

Ew.

She just hoped that this kid had some glimmer of an idea to help her get out of this place. If she was lucky he would have something better than making her stay in some random pie shoppe/tonsorial parlor to stay in while he went to get the coach to take them away. Surely he looked smarter than that…right?

No, no he did not.

Oh, there was no hope left! The Judge was going to marry her Monday!

"He wants to marry me on Sunday!" I suddenly yell. The boy is slightly startled by this I see.

"Don't worry, I have a-," he started.

"Was that a noise?" I screamed. What if the Judge was to come back from the court and see this strange boy in his home?

"I have a plan!"

"Oh, I think I heard a noise, but he's in court, he wouldn't be back yet would he? He wants to marry Monday!"

"I said I have a plan."

"If he plans to marry me Monday, I'll drink a poison on Sunday. There's a good apothecary on Fleet Street…"

"But I have a plan!"

"Oh, it's Friday, virtually Sunday! What can I do with so little time?"

"We'll leave tonight!"

"I think I heard something!"

"It was nothing."

"No, I think I heard the gate."

"…you don't have a gate."

"No, I know I heard a click!"

"Kiss me!"

"What?"

"Kiss me!"

"…why?"

"Um…because I have a plan…to free you…"

"So?"

"We will be married!"

"Marriage? Isn't that a little too…committal?"

"But, the Judge…"

"Where? Is he here?"

"No! But you don't want to marry him do you?"

"No! Of course not!"

"Good."

"But I never said I wanted to marry you."

"What?"

"What do you think, just because I don't want to marry the Judge, I automatically want to marry you?"

"N-no! I didn't say that!"

"Am I just some prize to be won? Do I have no say in whom I marry?"

"Of course you do! I just thought since you threw me that key and…"

"So, throwing a key to someone is the same as proposing marriage nowadays? I know I never been out of my house, and I don't know that many worldly things, but I think that that is a tad ridiculous."

"Uh…kiss me?"

"You're not very bright are you?"

"…We'll go to France?"

"Oh! Why didn't you say that earlier? I'd love to marry you…er…um, what's you're name?"

"Anthony. Anthony Hope."

"I will marry Anthony on Sunday in France. Wonderful!"

"Well, actually I was thinking of getting married in St. Dunstan's…"

"Oh, I knew that one day we would be together, even though I didn't even know your name!"

"Um, yeah…did you even hear what I just said?"

"Oh, sir, kiss me!"

"Really?"

"Kiss me!"

"Are-are you sure?"

"Quickly!"

"Yes, my love!" Johanna puckered up and Anthony started to lean in when something occurred to her.

"Wait, you're a sailor, right?"

"Yes, Johanna, I am."

"The Judge Turpin says that sailors know the ways of the world? Would you say you know the ways of the world, Anthony?"

"Um, you aren't going to show me dirty books, are you?"

"What?"

"Kiss me!"

Anthony ran down Kearney Lane to Fleet Street to tell Mr Todd of his wonderful news of his and Johanna's soon-to-be marriage. He would also have to bring up to his friend how to deal with mood swings. And how he feared for his love's hearing.

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A/N: Sorry, I don't think that was as funny as the first one. I dunno you tell me. Anyway, I have a few for Anthony and Johanna and the fact of the matter is that they are not nearly as funny as the Sweeney and Mrs Lovett ones. I don't know. I blame Anthony.

More to come soon (hopefully).

Next will be a Sweeney and Mrs. Lovett oneshot spoof type thing kay?

Momma always said that reviews were like a box a chocolates.