I do not own anything from Charlie and the Chocolate factory. Alton Brown and Food Network are not mine either. All rights and likenesses belong to Roald Dahl, Johnny Depp and Tim Burton . No profit is being garnered from this work. Thanks go out to Kanikan for the constructive criticism. I rightfully got pinged on the classification for this tale, so as of this update it's now under "drama" rather than "humor." Kaytie – this one's for you. – Stealth Phoenix
Chapter 69
The camera zoomed onto the face of the blond man with wireless glasses perched on his nose; he nods to the camera, blond hair looking as if he'd been dragged backward through the shrubbery outside.
"Good Evening! I'm Alton Brown and this is a special edition of Food Network Challenge. Tonight – two titans of the candy industry face off in a long standing grudge match. Veronica Carmichael, queen of spun sugar and partner of the legendary Willy Wonka against mighty Victor Brahm, chef to the stars, owner/operator of the international Dolce La Vita, and new face of Slugworth Candies."
The screen showed two head shot pictures, both Veronica and Victor are in traditional chef's jackets, heads turned away from each other – a look of calm resolve on Veronica's face, a bright smile with invitational tilt to the head on Victor's
"These two worked together last fall during the Confectionary Competition, but after the collapse of the center showpiece, parted company."
There was slow-motion collapse of the sculpture cutting to Victor's furious face and Veronica's disgusted look as turned to leave the competition after getting fired.
"The dispute grew as Carmichael formed a partnership with the reclusive candy magnate, Willy Wonka and Brahm formed his with rival Arthur Slugworth. Carmichael captured the world's attentions by escorting Wonka heir Charlie Bucket to charity events and bringing the new face of Wonka Inc into a larger world."
Footage of Veronica and Charlie, walking red carpets and smiling for cameras – her sparkling smile and Charlie's infectious grin made flashbulbs go off like heat lightning.
"Brahm came out with a series of visits to the "O" daytime talk show while balancing a grueling schedule of high-profile catering events before announcing his support of a new Slugworth product to be announced next month. The close hold information of what that product is supposed to be is the next-to-biggest secret in the candy industry."
Footage showing Victor's appearances on the "O", flirting with the audience and cooking rapidly while talking to Miss O, cutting to celebrity weddings and post-award parties where pictures were snapped of the stars and Victor, looking quite dashing in a tailored tuxedo.
"The biggest secret right now being, where is WillyWonka?"
"Tragedy struck a few weeks ago when Wonka and his heir were injured in an explosion involving Wonka's invention – the Wonkavator.
News footage of black smoke billowing from the rooftop – confused mixed shots from different cameras of Charlie, strapped to a stretcher being lifted into an ambulance. Others of a cluster of EMTs around a colorfully dressed figure on a stretcher as it rolled out of the building and behind the protective cover of a parked fire truck.
"Bucket was treated and released. But the status of the reclusive Chocolatier is unknown at this time and it is questionable if he will be here tonight as originally planned."
"Despite it all, Carmichael has vowed to push on."
Back stage cameras showed Veronica giving last minute instruction to her team – dressed in dark green jackets with a golden W over the right breast. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail and light make-up brought out the green of her eyes and lightly colored her lips and cheeks.
The camera cut to a similar scene on the opposite side of kitchen stadium –Victor addressing his team of three workers. All wore black jackets with the Slugworth patch on their right shoulders and Arthur Slugworth himself, in his natty charcoal grey suit, stood to the side watching Victor with a smug, pleased expression on his face.
"The competition, as agreed by the two captains, is made up of four parts – fruit, pastry, chocolate and spun sugar."
"A fruit dessert worth 10 points to be served to the judges after one hour – then one worker per side is eliminated.
"The second hour is a pastry dessert worth 15 points with another worker is eliminated."
"The third hour is a chocolate dessert worth 25 points with the final worker eliminated leaving the two team captains, Carmichael and Brahm, to complete a candy sculpture worth 50 points."
"The sculpture has to be at least three feet high, no inedible materials used. Proper techniques and kitchen hygine is worth 10 points as is taste. The lion's share of the points is for presentation. The judges will be basing their decision on execution, creativity and overall theme."
"The battleground? Kitchen Stadium. The stakes? Nothing less than the future of both of their individual companies. The prize? The loser's individual company and the recipe for the coveted CandyGlass co-created by both. Who will win this Olympian battle?
"This is Food Network Candy Challenge."
--
"Okay – this is it. Remember what we practiced. Neville, you're out after the first hour. Sandra, you're next and Michelle, you're last. Don't hog the equipment and remember to communicate problems as they're discovered, rather than when they inconvenience you…" Veronica said, her face grim as the clock showed ten minutes to competition.
"Relax – we've got your back. Worry instead about who Victor called in as his ringers," Neville said, nodding in the direction of the small group on the other side of the kitchen.
Veronica shook her head, "No – I'm not wasting any time with that. What's done is done and I refuse to let him see me upset."
Within the small community of chefs specializing in various candy, it was easy to know each other.
Victor had tapped into her particular field and had managed to find one of the few people that knew her techniques inside and out…
…after all, he had taught her.
Across the kitchen, the older man saw her looking and waved merrily.
Jacques DuPane, Cordon Bleu instructor now based out of Paris had been her instructor in the art of spinning sugar. He was clueless to the politics of the field outside the walls of academia and had been snapped up by Victor to work for his team.
Victor looked to see who Jacques was waving to and smirked, giving a little wave of his own.
"Asshole," Sandra growled through a bright smile, nodding in their direction. "Poor Jacques doesn't know what he's getting into."
"Bridgette does though," Michelle said, indicating the tall, dark slender woman standing by Victor's side. The black woman had painfully short hair and huge liquid black eyes. "I heard that he's been banging her as soon as she demonstrated her talent with chocolate," she reported.
"Probably wanted to cement her loyalty," Veronica said cynically.
"What about that guy?" asked Neville, pointing to the short balding man with his back to them.
"I dunno. His name's Charles and he's supposed to be working fruit. Other than that, I don't know." Sandra said.
"Think Vic is banging him too?" Neville asked, sly grin on his lips. The discovery of Victor making appearances on various gay websites had thrilled him to no end.
Veronica snickered, "Who knows?"
There was a wave from Alton toward the front of kitchen stadium.
"Oops. That's the sign. Take your places." Veronica grinned at her team. She put on her game face and strode to the stairway that led to the raised platform where Alton waited with Victor and Slugworth.
Victor was looking smug as she climbed the stairs alone. Willy's continuing absence noted.
"Good Evening, Ms. Carmichael," Slugworth said silkily.
"Good evening, Mr. Slugwoth…Victor," she replied, giving her rival grudging recognition.
"Where is your sponsor for this event?" Slugworth asked, with mock innocence and concern. The two men eyed her predatorily, like two lions circling around something young and wobbly.
"Behind you," replied an unexpected familiar voice.
Slugworth and Victor whirled in alarm to see the dapper figure of the missing man in question. He had stepped out of the door from the control room.
Willy stood with glove-clad hands resting lightly on his familiar Nerds-filled cane, the gleam of the black and white swirled knob contrasting with the purple latex. He wore a bright red velvet frock coat with matching band around his black top hat. His clothes revealed no suspicious bulges of bandages or casts. He wore his dark goggles to protect his sensitive eyes from the glare of the hot lights overhead.
"Good evening Willy. You look well," Slugworth recovered first, covering his surprise with an urbane greeting.
Victor was struggling to do the same, managing to paste a smile across his face, "Mr Wonka. I'm glad to see you here this evening."
Willy stepped forward to take his place at Veronica's side, face showing contrived surprise, "You are? Where else would I be? This is the hot ticket tonight and I want to see the show up close and personal."
"Sir, it's a pleasure to meet you, I'm Alton Brown," said their host, a degree of surprise and awe in his voice.
"Alton – love your shows!" Willy said shortly, nodding to the blond man with a plastic grin.
The camera swung to face them and as the red light came on, Alton smoothly moved into 'professional' mode, "Mr. Wonka, as this is your first appearance in public since closing your factory, and rumors of your demise seem to have been greatly overstated, how are you doing tonight?"
"I'm just peachy! Thanks to the efforts of the medical community I'm better than ever. New and Improved - Wonka 2.0!" he chirped, his voice slightly higher than normal due to nerves, but only Veronica knew that.
"So what brings you out into the limelight after all these years?" Alton asked.
"I wouldn't miss this for the world, Alton. I have full faith in Veronica and her abilities and am here to show my support," Willy said, placing his hand on her shoulder. She looked at him fondly and patted his hand with her own. Alton saw the flash of gold on her finger.
"Any truth to the rumor of any engagements?" Alton asked, raising one eyebrow.
Willy playfully wagged a finger at the man, "Aw, Alton, you shouldn't have asked. I never guessed that you were interested. I'm sorry to break your heart, but I'm not that type of guy. I realize that I'm astonishingly handsome, a snappy dresser and can dance, but you really shouldn't read too deeply into stereotypes."
Alton blushed bright red and stammered, "Mr. Wonka, I'm married with kids…"
"Good for you! Best thing really…move on without me. Live a long full life and enjoy. I'll survive…" he sniffed mockingly and wiped an imaginary tear from his cheek.
Slugworth just rolled his eyes in exasperation while Victor stared at the strange man.
Veronica blushed prettily, looking down in embarrassment, but she didn't remove her hand from his where it rested on her shoulder.
"We're not here this evening to discuss such things," Veronica finally said firmly, dragging the topic back on track before Willy could break out into "My Heart Will Go On" and scare everyone away. "We're here this evening to lay all cards on the table and determine who the best candy maker in the world is."
Alton turned to Victor and Slugworth
"Victor, you're here representing Slugworth Candies with Arthur Slugworth – how did this cooperation come about?"
"It was a natural relationship to develop – Victor approached us with an idea for a product using CandyGlass and we're eager to make it happen," Slugworth said calmly, coming across as a more mature serious businessman than the hyper owner of Wonka Inc.
"That's right Arthur – I went to the company who could help me develop and market my idea without the secrecy or strange stipulations that others may have," Victor said smoothly, not even looking in Willy and Veronica's direction.
Veronica tensed - the one-two punch of claiming her invention and going to Slugworth to sell it off was hitting below the belt.
"Steady," Willy whispered from behind his plastic smile.
"And what is this idea?" Alton asked.
Victor looked directly into the camera and winked, "Stay tuned – once I win the competition, we're going to give Food Network a sneak preview."
Willy stiffened and it was her turn to sooth him by patting his hand as Slugworth looked smug, "Easy now – don't give him the satisfaction" she whispered back. "We both know who's going to win."
"Thank you both – Chefs, take your places, the competition is about to start," Alton announced. The camera cut off and Alton shook both Victor and Veronica's hands, "Good luck!"
--
Victor narrowed his eyes thoughtfully. Engaged? Looks like the little gold digger is setting her hook, he thought spitefully. Some of the little by plays and looks exchanged at the marketing meeting made sense now.
Seeing the man standing before him had been quite the nasty shock though. He hadn't been far when the bomb had exploded – down the alleyway in the back by the fire escape in fact. It had startled him badly when it went off so soon and he'd ducked the flying debris, taking shelter behind one of the dumpsters. Some of the flying glass had cut his hands.
Still the sense of warm satisfaction of a job well done upon seeing the billowing black smoke was well worth it. Even more so when Willy's famous black top hat had floated down to land nearby. It'd been beyond temptation to take it home as a trophy.
So much for that, he thought grimly as he approached his team. Somehow the bastard had managed to escape scot free. How had he managed it? They wheeled him out on a stretcher!
Piss and moan later, he reminded himself firmly, work now.
His team stood at attention at their stations facing Alton Brown. Veronica's team mirrored them.
"Contestants ready?"
He nodded. Veronica called, "Ready!"
"Begin!"
The six hour time clock started its countdown and suddenly the kitchen was a flurry of movement. Charles bolted for the refrigerator to yank the fresh berries and other fruit from their places as well as his other ingredients. Victor focused on him first after ensuring that Jacques was in fact working.
During practices, the spun sugar master had a bad habit of drifting off into daydreams and working at a lackadaisical pace that was ill suited for competition.
Seeing that he was pouring sugar to start melting, he turned toward Charles. Fruit was the first dessert up and Charles had carefully designed a lingonberry lemon mousse with a rich mango sauce to fit the timeframe and the elegance demanded. Seeing the camera swing his way, he vigorously started pulling the delicate stems off the fruit and dropping them into the bowl.
Time to look good.
--
After watching Veronica work for a moment, Willy quietly stepped back into the control room. Rows of computer screens and production equipment filled the room and the quiet chatter of the Food Network broadcast technicians filled the air. Willy removed his goggles, putting the wall at his back out of the way in a dark corner and watched the screens.
I miss my television room, he thought wistfully.
"How are you doing, Willy?" asked Charlie over the concealed earpiece under hat and hair.
"Aching pretty good right now. I had to get away from Slugworth or risk punching him in the nose," he whispered back.
His low voice was overlooked by the camera crews as they cut from shot to shot putting the production together.
"Dev-On says you're due for another dose of Wonkavite," Charlie relayed.
"I know – it'll have to wait. At least I'm up and moving normally, right?" he replied.
Such considerable progress in so short a time!
After waking from surgery and getting the blasted tube out of his throat, the first thing that Willy did was demand to know when he would be released.
Well, technically, the first thing he did was get a warm kiss from Veronica, but then he made his demands…
…And was ignored.
Outraged, he demanded to speak with the physician in charge.
Nurse Ratchett (actual name Phyllis) told him in no certain terms that Dr. Mettu had gone home and he'd just have to wait until he made his rounds the next afternoon.
Considering he was still feeling pretty lightheaded and in pain from the surgery, he was forced to back off for the moment and Nurse Ratchett had acted insufferably smug the rest of the day. In retaliation – he took a nap.
Veronica had stuck to his side the entire time, even telling the officious nurse to do something anatomically impossible when she tried chasing his fiancée away after visiting hours. Seeing her lovely face sleeping in the chair next to his when he had awoken filled his chest with a warm fuzzy glow.
Of course that could have been the morphine too.
When Dr. Mettu finally made his appearance, the man had been reluctant to let Willy leave so soon. Probably wanting to charge as much as possible for unappetizing green Jello with unidentified floating chunks in it, Willy thought cynically.
So with Veronica's help, he checked out AMA – against medical advice.
Sneaking out of the hospital had involved three vans, a wheelchair, a quick trip to the neo-natal unit and an ungodly ugly dress.
Dev-On had swung into action as soon as he was home and judicious applications of a hot herbal poultice to keep infections out and Wonkavite managed to get him to the point where he could look and act normal for hours at a time.
There was some scarring on his back and shoulder where shrapnel from the Wonkavator had tagged him – and the surgically repaired muscle didn't quite work as it used to, ranging the movement of his arm on the right side. But all in all, he was getting back to his old self.
Of course that didn't mean he minded playing up his injuries if he could scam a sponge bath out of Veronica.
The down side was as his body went through accelerated healing, he would eat like a horse and if not careful, would drop off asleep with narcoleptic ease.
"Still there?" Charlie asked. It was his job during the competition to make sure Willy didn't take a nap at the wrong time.
"Yeah – just thinking," Willy murmured.
"Better head out to the platform - Slugworth is looking a little suspicious. Guess he feels better if he can keep an eye on you," said Charlie.
Willy didn't reply, but pushed his glasses back on with a sigh and started toward the control room door.
"Mr. Wonka?" asked a young woman in the front row. She wore a headset and had shoved the microphone out of the way to address him.
"Yes?" he squeaked. He hated people just coming up and talking to him. Pushing his voice back down to a reasonable range he coughed and tried again, "Yes?"
"I have a question about one of the stipulations of the agreement between team captains. Apparently there was a condition that if workers were to be eliminated – as is planned – that a selection of music had to be played over the speakers to the kitchen," the nervous woman said.
"That was a statement. What's the question?" he replied haughtily.
"Where's the music? I mean – there's no CD, file or anything with whatever tunes we're supposed to play," replied the woman, flapping her hands in aggravation.
"Oh! I get it – you need the music," Willy said, slapping himself in the forehead and almost knocking his hat off.
"Yes, Mr. Wonka," the woman said, looking expectant.
"Um…Willy? The CD is sitting right here. You forgot to grab it on the way out," Charlie said over the earpiece.
Crap.
Then inspiration hit like a meteor.
"Umm…gimme a moment…" Willy said, holding up one hand in supplication as he frantically dug through various pocket.
She'd given it to him for safekeeping before the competition…It wasn't the same, but something had to be better than nothing, right?
Locating it, he hauled out a small poisonous green IPod – brand new and fully loaded with a wide selection of her favorite songs. He played with it for a moment before finding a good song list.
"Here! Hook this in and play "Shake n' Bake" song list first and scroll through the rest after that's done," he said, handing the young woman the IPod.
She looked dubious, "Are you serious?"
"I try not to be – it causes wrinkles," he replied with a grin before turning a walking out the control room door.
Slugworth was sitting in his seat at the small area set up on top of the platform. It was a way to catch the sponsor's faces while their champions worked on camera while they sat in comfort.
Willy took his own seat and relaxed as best as he could while feeling eyes crawling all over him.
"Feeling better?" Slugworth asked solicitously, the gleam of malice in his eye.
"Much thank you. Too many burritos for lunch – Whew!" Willy said with a grin, enjoying the man's recoil in disgust.
"Think you can slip him some of the broccoli flavoring into his water?" asked Charlie, his voice soft in his ear.
Willy smirked, but said nothing.
Loud pounding music suddenly blasted from all the speakers in Kitchen Stadium – startling everyone and making one of Victor's team members drop a steel pan of molten chocolate with a crash. Victor could be seen yelling something to his team, but he said was lost in a wail of electronically enhanced guitar licks.
"What the hell is that?" Slugworth roared in confusion.
"Bad Reputation Remix by Joan Jett," Willy yelled back, "Not my favorite version, but there's no accounting for taste."
Veronica paused and looked back at Willy. She gave him two thumbs up and a wide grin before turning back to her duties. Her team was grinning and heads were bopping to the beat.
"Turn that crap off," yelled Slugworth.
"Nope! Stipulation 12, subclause B of our contract for the competition – you get the worker eliminations and we get control of the stereo. Them's the rules!" Willy said smugly.
"Is this going to play for the entire time?" asked older man said in shock.
"No – I think there's some Gorillaz and Green Day thrown in there for good measure as well," Willy said thoughtfully, nodding in time to the beat and watching the action with intent interest.
Slugworth groaned.
It was going to be a long 6 hours.