Arfea: Well...we're back! And wasn't that ending a shocker? Well...things only get odder...although the story begins to actually have a point from here on! O.O!

Alcy: Now we have a villan! yay! -

Arfea: Err...yeah...I guess...although the true villan won't be revealed for a little while...

Alcy: And then comes the big finale!

Arfea: Ok, Dissy, do your thing! (Alcy made me)

Dissy: I've said it a million times...well not really...only a few...

GoPD: I said it first! ( Ghost of Previous Disclaimer)

Dissy: Well, yeah, but I'm sick of saying it...check previous posts for the disclaimer..i'm off to have some tea...

Chapter 5 A Fish, A Zombie, A Plot...Oh My!

Legolas stared at the phone astonishedly. "... You're joking, right?" "No! couldn't you tell?" "Well, no. How did this all start?" "Well, one night, Boromir asked me If I wanted to see the horn of Gondor (authors note: taken from Very Secret Diaries of FOTR. Cassie claire ROCKS!), and when I said yes..." "Pippin, you fell for that old line?" "Yes, I know... anyways, I fell in love with him, and thats how it happened."

Legolas sighed, "if you must know pippin, you weren't the last he tried that line on." Pippin began to sob into the phone and Legolas back peddled to fix the situation.

"But you could tell he really meant it with you!" Pippin stopped sobbing and sniffled, "Really?" Legolas crossed his fingers and answered enthusiastically, "Yes of course! Hold on, there's a knock at my door, be right back!"

Legolas put the phone on hold and put it down. He then started laughing. "GAHAHAHAHAHA! HE ACTUALLY FELL FOR THAT ONE! OH THAT'S RICH!" He then composed himself, and picked the phone back up. "Salesman. You were saying?"

And Frodo, who had actually knocked at the door, wondered what the loud noise was about. "Uh Legolas? Hello? Anyone there?" Legolas, however was in the middle of consoling Pippin. Frodo sighed. "FREE HAIR CARE PRODUCTS!" he shouted. Legolas burst through the door, knocking Frodo over, poor frofro.

"FREE STUFF?" he shouted. He then looked around. "hello?" Frodo sweatdropped. "Down here, you dolt!" Legolas looked down. "Oh, didn't see you there Frodo," he joked as he helped him up. Frodo sighed. "Here, I got you some cheesecake and a new set of arrows. AND... " He pulled a fish out from his purse. "I caught you this delicious bass." It was now legolas's turn to sweatdrop. (Alcy: man, Napoleon Dynamite quoting is extremley agravating...)

Legolas smiled and accepted the gifts graciously, "Thank you Frodo. I assume this is an apology?" Frodo nodded, slightly embarassed, and threw the fish out of the window (Arfea: fish? Argh, I haven't seen Napoleon Dynamite yet...) "Do you accept?" Legolas just smiled, "Well, wanna have some cheesecake with me? OOH," He ran back inside and picked up the phone, where Pippin was swearing at him, "Why don't you comeover pippin, i've got cheesecake..." Pippin appeared within seconds...

"FOOD!" Pippin pounced on the cheesecake and started to gobble it up, until he remembered that others wanted to eat it too. Personally, I think cheesecake is nasty, but its their choice... Sorry. Anyways, Frodo and Legolas sweatdropped, while Pippin proceeded to cut off slices of the remainders of the melty, now half-eaten cheesecake.

"So what have you been up to recently, Froda- I mean Frodo?" Asked pip.

Legolas smiled, "Apparently buying me cheesecake. These arrows are very nice by the way. So Pippin, will you continue your story?" Pippin sweat dropped, "well,we should fill Frodo in..."

After filling Frodo in and filling up on cheesecake, the three of them proceeded to go for a walk outside. They wandered until they ran into (quite literally) Galadriel. "Oh, there you three are." She said. "You guy's gotta come see this." She grabbed all three of them by the wrist (don't ask how) and dragged them all to ... the mirror (DUNDUNDUN)...

Meanwhile, Merry and Aragorn decided to go for a walk. They meet up with Galadriel and the others, and Pippin burst into tears.. "you left me for a human Merry?" Merry smiles, "Well, you fell for a human first!"

Galadriel interrupted, "Um, can we save this for later? We HAVE to get to the mirror before it shuts off."
"Alright" they responded.
As they all ran for the mirror, however, Frodo tripped and fell. Legolas, acting instictivley, turned around and caught him. They both blushed, as Legolas put him down.

Aragorn, seeing both Frodo and Legolas blush, smiled to himself, he wanted his long time friend and short time lover to be happy, even if it was being in love with the wimp who couldn't destroy the ring...anyway! (Arfea: Tee hee...)Merry and Pippin smiled too and they all turned toward Galadriel. "You all must look at what I have seen." She said.

They proceeded to crowd around the mirror. After a short wait, something appeared in the mirror. They collectiveley gasped. then stared. "Oops." Galadriel hurredly turned a knob on the side of the mirror. "Celeborn's been watching porn again..." ¬¬ she mumbled to herself. Yeah, that was random. Anywho, the image they were meant to see was a picture from the past: Boromir and Pippin.

Far away, Celeborn felt a sharp pain in his head. Ow, guess she found the porn, well, if she'd put out a little more, I wouldn't have to watch it... He goes back to his palantir (dunno how he got it) and proceeds to watch more porn. This was an uneventful part of the story, but was used to breakup the dramatic tension, back to the real story,

"What the hell is this?" Aragorn asked after a short pause by everyone. "um.. uhh... um..." Pippin stuttered. Frodo stood in front of Pippin defensively. "Why do you care? can't someone's private life be left private once in a while?" "Frodo, they already saw it. I think its too late to try to keep it hidden," Legolas whispered. "oh, yeah..."

Galadriel cleared her throat, "um, that wasn't exactly the reason i called you all here...this is..." With a dramatic swish of her robes (b/c she's a drama queen) she changed the picture and they all gasped, collectively. Boromir stood there, looking all evil and zombie-like, over some dead bodies. "Someone has awoken him, or at least his body, and is now terrorizing the Westfold. (dunno what other place for it to be) They all gasped again, 'Whatever shall we do?"

They all thought...
"Lets buy a ping-pong table!" merry shouted. they all face-faulted.

Arfea: facefaults as well
Alcnolien: innocent face Whaaaaat?

"Maybe we should go... Kill... him?" Aragorn suggested.
"NO!" Pippin shouted.
They all turned to look at him. "Boromir was the only man I really loved. We CAN'T kill him!" "Dude, he's killing innocent people, and he's a zombie. I seriously doubt that he's going to be the same loving mate that you had before he died the first time." Pippin looked up at Frodo. "I don't believe you." He then ran off to cry alone.

Legolas sighed and smacked Frodo on the head, "Mr. Sensitive..I'll go talk to him." Legolas followed Pippin and found him sobbing in a clearing. "Don't worry Pippin, it'll be alr.." Before Legolas finished, Borozombie came out from the shadows and grabbed Legolas. Pippin cried out, "NO BORRY!" And the others came running, only to find that it was too late, Legolas was gone...

Arfea:Wheee (not excitedly)its the end.

Alcy: w00t.

Arfea: We finally have a plot.
Alcy: And another cliffhanger.
Arfea: Well, we don't have anything interesting to do ourselves, seeing as we have to figure out a way to motivate our disclaimer without paying him more...
Alcy: So instead we will have Frodo and Legolas strip-dancing.
Arfea: Enjoy.
both go to watch... and drool... a lot.
Legolas and Frodo: proceed to do silly things not sexy at all... Must be a middle earth thing.
Samwise:pulls himself away from the strippage Um... Review, dammit! I'm trying to watch!