Jonie said I can't blame her for this one. Damn, I wish I could.
"Why do they always run?"
It was like the catch phrase of an action-packed blockbuster movie. But it was well justified Dr. Brennan could see. Booth had just scaled a wall, taken down a killer, putting him in handcuffs and flung him into the back of the SUV, all without breaking a sweat. Needless to say his partner was proud.
So while he reveled in his new action hero status, Brennan decided to play the role of hard-to-please but secretly proud superior.
"You did good," she said, and to top it off, she swatted him on the rear.
...
"How many times do I have to tell you stop doing that?"
It had been weeks since that first thwack. She was getting to do it more and more, as he simultaneously ignored it less and less.
"I'm sorry," she wasn't, "It's just a gesture of appreciation, of solidarity and fraternity. It could possibly be equated to a guy hug."
"Yes but a guy hug tends to hurt me less. I'm leaving."
"Bye...cowboy," Brennan gave his cute little rear a slap with the file she was holding.
He stopped, and she expected him to give her a fine and proper telling off. But he just let out a pent-up sigh and continued.
...
"Don't you dare!"
This time -three weeks in- Booth caught her hand before she could do any more damage. She peered at him innocently, her eyes looking at him like a puppy that didn't know tearing up the sofa was wrong. Speaking of sofas, they had been on the one in Brennan's office. Hodgins and called them to see something important to the case. Booth (unlucky for him) got up first and Brennan (lucky for her) got the chance to give his rear end a good whack. But that is when he caught her arm.
"You would not want somebody to walk around slapping you. So respect me and my ass!"
Your nice cushy ass, said Brennan's brain.
...
They were in the interrogation room a week after. The suspect they had been interrogating had confessed to the crime and was now in custody. They felt good having taken another criminal off the streets. Booth beamed at her.
"Well that's it. You wanna go grab some food at the diner?"
"Sure," she said automatically. He got up and walked towards the door. She soon caught up and took the opportunity to give her partner a swat on the rear.
He stopped and turned, looking at her in a way that told her she was in trouble.
"You," he growled, "have gone too far, Bones. I told you not to do that."
"Sorry," she wasn't, "It was just a reflex."
"Reflex my ass."
"Exactly. A reflex that involves me smacking your ass."
"You know turnabout's fair play."
"I don't know..."
Before she could finish, he drew her to him and held her firmly as he administered his palm to her rear end, each smack emitting a different response from his anthropologist partner.
One!
"OW!" she squealed in pain and surprise, her eyes wide.
Two!
"Oh!" Less pain, more surprise and a hint of something Booth couldn't name.
Three!
An incomprehensible sound.
"You see! Nobody likes to get spanked. So the next time you spank me, I'm spanking you right back!"
"Really?" she asked.
"Yes, Bones. Really."
He turned around, only to feel his partner's hand as it tapped him lightly on his rear.
"Didn't you hear what I just said?" he turned and said to her.
Brennan stared at him with faux innocence.
"I'm not joking with you, Temperance Brennan! You're getting that back!"
He grabbed her again, this time turning her so she held on to the table. He swatted her, hard, three more times and turned her back around.
"You see now that I'm not playing with you? I'm dead serious, Bones!"
"I know," she said, "I'm sorry." Once again, she wasn't.
"You better be," he turned to walk out, thought better of it, and stood aside to let her pass him first. As she walked by him, her hand snaked out and slapped him on the rear.
Booth nearly lost his mind.
"What is wrong with you?" he held on to her again and swung her till she was holding on to the table once more. This time, his hands came down on her six times, his anger not enough to cause her serious pain, but enough that she should have learned her lesson.
"What do you think about that, huh?" he said angrily, grabbing her by the arms and turning her back around, "Don't you feel degraded, humiliated, even maybe remorseful?"
Then he looked at her face. Her clouded eyes. Her slightly open, pushed out lips. Her laboured breathing...
"You're enjoying this?!"
"Nobody has ever spanked me in my life before," she said in a husky voice.
Booth squinted at her, "You've gotta be kidding me!"
"I have heard that some couples use it as foreplay, but I never found it necessary. I'm more of a garter belt and thigh high pantyhose person."
"TMI, Bones," said Booth, letting her go.
"TM..."
"Too much information!"
"Oh. I will stop hitting you, Booth, since you don't like it," she told him, while in her head going over her list of lovers and tried to find one that might be into that, "I on the other hand..."
"You're sick,"
"Don't say that to me!" she swatted him on the rear again.
His anger was so much that he didn't realise it was a trap. He turned her to the desk and hit her a few more times. Then he realised; she had tricked him into hitting her again!
"Bones- you -need- to- stop- hitting- me!" he said angrily, surprised he was still hitting her even after he realised the trap. Finally he stopped.
"And you need to keep hitting me," she turned to him, lights dancing in her eyes.
"We gotta go," he said, "someone could be watching through the glass."
Brennan turned to the one-sided glass in the interrogation room and sighed, seeing his point.
"Okay. I'll call Kenny later."
"Who is Kenny?"
"An old boyfriend of mine. He seems the most likely to be into spanking."
Booth scrunched up his face, "TMI, Bones! Way too much information!" he turned again to walk out.
"Well, what else do you want me to do?" she asked.
It was like he had eyes in the back of his head. He turned around just as her hand went up in the air.
"Don't even think about it!"
Just review. With this story, I'll be satisfied with a "Where the heck did that come from?"
Actually I have no answer to that question.