Graham arrived at the school the next morning in bright spirits. The last two months working with Hannah had brought him back into the world he thrived in. No longer was he dealing with New York parents who thought their children were going to be the next Rubinstein, dishing out money for expensive lessons when their children lacked the drive to make it into the competitive circuit. Hannah was determined. She wanted it all and he looked forward to every moment spent with her as she became that pianist he once had been. He admitted the attraction was still there and had claimed to himself time and time again that the friendship they had together was by far more important than anything else. Of course it was a lie. He wanted much more and last night he felt that what he wanted was now obtainable. The flirting, the holding hands, the kiss. It was possible Hannah wanted it too.
Hannah was playing one of the Chopin Nocturnes when Graham walked in, "Good morning, Ms. Masterson. Lovely morning."
She glanced at him slightly, never missing a note. She shook her head, annoyed by his cheery disposition. Graham smiled triumphantly as he placed his coat over an armchair and then moved to her side. Leaning over her shoulder he eyed her fingering, "Index finger on the C sharp, Hannah, or you will never reach the high B in the next measure." He then moved over to the window listening closely to her performance.
Hannah slipped on the B, and he cringed. The pace then built and her playing soon was heavy. He turned and snarled, "Alright, stop. Now. Since when did Chopin start sounding like Elephants doing a sprint?"
She pounded on the keys, "You threw me off. I hate when you waltz in here, all cheery and pleasant. It's early, I've had a rough night and I need to warm up. It's never my best time."
He knew it was much more. "So what do you really want to say to me? Go on, spit it out. We can't work together if you are going to behave in this manner."
"Maybe we can't work together period. Maybe that is all there is to it."
"Because I kissed you? Really, now, Hannah, you're being a bit melodramatic."
"I'm uncomfortable."
"That's the last thing I want you to be."
"Then why did you kiss me?"
He laughed, "Because you asked me to."
"This is hardly funny. You should have known this could ruin everything. How could I concentrate on my playing when I know that you are watching me, looking at me in that way? "
"I am not looking at you any differently than I did a few weeks ago. I am a professional who is here to do a job. Getting you back onto the concert stage is my only intention."
"I don't believe you."
He smiled, "Well, at least for now. Once you've performed at Columbia, then we'll see what happens."
She stood up and began to pace the room, "See what happens? Nothing. Absolutely nothing is going to happen. I am your student. Nothing more. The kiss was nothing."
"You keep telling yourself that, Hannah, and then maybe you will actually believe it."
"I can fire you."
"Yes, you can. 2 weeks before your first concert. Do you really think that is wise? But I can leave now, if that's what you want." He headed towards his coat not really sure what he was doing. He had no intention of leaving and couldn't believe Hannah would actually fire him. When she didn't respond right away he turned around and watched her rubbing her temples and sighing heavily. He hadn't expected her to have this kind of reaction.
Hannah tried taking deep breaths. She wanted to be in control but she wasn't pulling it off. Why would she threaten to fire Graham? She couldn't bare the thought of losing him. He wasn't just her teacher, he was her confident and friend. She looked forward to the grueling hours at the piano with him by her side and the down time that they talked and laughed. "You make me want this more than anything. I don't want to do this without you." She put her hands to her face, wanting to cry.
He moved back towards her and gently pulled her into his arms, "And you're not going to have to." He let out a sigh, "I want this for you too."
"But you want more."
"Only if you want it."
She lifted her head and looked him in the eyes, "I don't know what I want right now. I can't think past the concert. I know that's not what you want to hear."
He lifted her chin, "Darling, Hannah, that is what I expect to hear from someone with your ambition and drive. I'm here to help make it happen. Okay, that's it. You don't need to be worrying about me and my desires, but the Chopin…I think you might want to worry a tad about that."
She managed a smile. His face was inches from hers and she felt a shiver jolt through her body. Placing her hand gently on his cheek she kissed his lips. Short and sweet, much like the previous night. He was a little surprised but not at all disappointed. He knew this was going to be a slow process if it was going to happen at all and he was willing to give her time.
She moved to the piano before he could even respond. "The Chopin is perfect, I told you earlier, you threw me." She started playing and Graham stood back, crossing his arms across his chest in disbelief. "And don't just assume that just because you are bright eyed and bushy tailed at 9am, the rest of us follow suit."
"I'll try and remember that Ms. Masterson."
"You do that and then maybe we can make this work." She returned to the nocturne. This time it was flawless.
He smiled. As far as he was concerned it was already working.
With only a week before her concert, Hannah's emotions were high. If only she could blame it on nerves and the grueling rehearsals. That she could deal with but it was Graham's hand resting on her thigh as he went over the dynamics in her Haydn Sonata or the back of his hand caressing her cheek after one of her outbursts. And the absolute worst… their fingers entwining as they sat on the sofa after a particularly exhausting practice. She had no idea what was going on. She liked it but at the same time, it confused her.
They spent so much time together. It seemed natural but there was still Logan. She didn't care if she never spoke to him or didn't know where he was. Those feelings were still there so why was she enjoying Graham's company so much? Why did she like him touching her when all she really wanted was Logan to touch her?
She had been wandering the halls for the last half hour. Restless. As she passed by the teacher's lounge she overheard a discussion about a mission taking place tonight. Kurt looked up to see Hannah at the doorway, "Now you we could use."
Hannah a bit dazed looked around and then pointed to herself, "Me? I'm hardly XMen material."
"Routine retrieving information, hardly dangerous."
Scott turned to Hannah, "I think Hannah should be sticking to her piano for now. There will be plenty of similar missions at a later time."
Now the idea was stuck in her head. This could be just what she needed to clear her mind. She turned to Kurt, "Thank you for thinking of me Kurt. I'm flattered but I'm sure Scott is right, there will be other missions and I must stick to my piano." She said sarcastically as she headed down the hall.
Jean turned to Scott, "She really doesn't like you."
"I was stating a fact."
"And that's all there is to it?"
"Oh, for gods sake, Jean. You know she's been irritable and agitated lately. I don't need that on my team."
Storm turned to Jean, "Do you think it's just the concert or something else? Her agitation?"
"You know her better than I."
"But you're the doctor."
"You think it has something to do with Logan?" Jean questioned.
Scott stood up in disgust, "Oh, come on. The guy has been gone for months and anyhow, it's obvious this piano teacher has a thing for her."
Storm smiled, "Well, well, Scott, you are becoming quite observant."
"They're always together laughing and talking. Logan is the farthest thing from her mind."
"I wouldn't be so sure." Storm commented.
Hannah headed straight for her father's office. The door was open but she knocked anyhow.
Her father looked up from his papers, "Hannah." He closed the file and smiled, "what a lovely surprise."
"I had to get away from the piano."
"You do deserve a break. You've been practicing nearly every waking hour."
"Graham says I need a break too. I suppose I'm a bit nervous. I don't want to let anyone down."
"And you won't."
There was a silence. As she sat down on the sofa, she began fiddling with her fingers. The Professor watched her. She was there for a reason and he was just waiting for her to speak first.
"I heard the others talking about a mission this evening."
"Ah, yes, there are some documents we need to acquire concerning the young lad that was brought in yesterday. He's had a rough time. No family. Put in an institution probably due to his mutation. Any background information will be helpful in this situation."
"I can help."
He examined her seriously, "Hannah, this probably isn't the best time with only a few days until your concert."
"It's just what I need. Kurt said it wasn't dangerous and I can retrieve the information in seconds without stealing a thing. Please let me do this." She pleaded.
He rubbed his chin contemplating this idea, then spoke "I must admit, it has been on the back of my mind but recently I have found you anxious and irritable and thought it would be best for you to pass this particular mission up."
"Yes, I've been anxious. It's Graham. I need this, Father because if I don't get my mind off the piano and the concert and Graham, I will scream."
"Graham?" He was definitely perplexed by this information.
"Please don't ask right now. Just let me go on this mission."
He sat silently watching her face. Hoping he could read her expressions since her mind was out of the question. He knew there had been some tension between Graham and Hannah recently and could only guess that the developing relationship he had wished for was actually happening. But Hannah was giving nothing away.
"I can go right?"
He let out a sigh, "Alright. You can suit up and meet the others and myself in the jet hanger for a briefing in an hour."
She jumped out of the seat and reached over embracing him, "This means the world to me, Father. Maybe I can be Xmen material after all."
"We'll see." He watched her leave the room. He would give anything to know what was going on with her right now. Was she really moving on with Graham or was she not ready to let go of the feelings she was hanging on to for Logan. It was at times like this it killed him that he couldn't just pop into her mind for a second. Life would be so much easier.
Scott's team included Kurt, Storm and now Hannah. He couldn't deny that with Hannah's involvement the mission would be simplified but her moods were all over the place lately and he wasn't the only one to notice it but Scott received his orders from the professor and if he wanted her on this mission that's how it would be.
The flight to San Francisco was uneventful but for Hannah it was the escape she needed. There was no piano; no Graham and she found herself caught up in all of Kurt's wild and amazing stories. Dressed all in black leather, she felt she belonged somewhere else besides the world of classical music. Her talents lay deeper than mastering Rachmoninov's Piano Concerto. Here she was helping someone like her and it gave her a sense of pride being part of the team even if Scott had his apprehensions. She was only too aware of his glances at her during the flight. Tonight she would prove that she could be an Xmen.
Once at the Bay Area Mental Clinic, Scott and Storm dealt with distracting the night crew. A storm that caused power outages and Scott asking unending questions to a tired security guard. Kurt bamfed Hannah into the Office where the files were kept and once she placed her hand on Michael Brower's, she went to work skimming through every page. It was extensive. More than 50 pages, and as she reached the last few, she felt a wave of nausea rush over her. She tried to refocus but she felt dizzy and her hand slowly let the papers fall to the floor before her own body collapsed at Kurt's feet.
Kneeling besides her he patted her face gently, "Hannah."
She opened her eyes slowly, "What happened?" She saw the papers slewed across the floor. Trying to push herself up, the jolt hit her again.
Kurt began to tidy up the mess, as he heard noise coming from down the hall, "We have to go. You going to be okay?"
She held her hand to her brow and nodded. He picked her up and bamfed out of the office before the door opened.
As they reached the others at the jet, Hannah leaned on Kurt for support. She couldn't remember ever feeling this sick. Storm rushed to their side, "Hannah, what is it? Kurt what happened?"
"She passed out. All very suddenly."
Scott stood back his hands crossed over his chest, "I told the professor she wasn't ready."
Hannah only to aware of Scott's glare, pulled herself away from Kurt and pushed Storm's hands away, "I'm fine."
Storm glared at Scott as they entered the jet and took their places, "Give her a break, Scott. It was hot in there. I'm sure she got the information."
Hannah buckled herself in, "I'm sorry. I have so much going on right now, I don't know what happened in there. But I did get all the information. 50 pages. It's all here." She pointed to her head. Another wave of nausea burst through her and she leaned her head down rubbing her temples. It went as fast as it came and she pulled herself together finding all eyes on her "You can't tell my father this happened, please. I begged him to let me do this. If he finds out I passed out, I'll never get another chance. It means the world to me that he's giving me this opportunity. I finally feel I am actually fitting in and making a difference."
Storm and Scott exchanged glances. Then Scott spoke up, "I don't know, Hannah. He should be told. It really should be included in our report."
It was typical of Scott to be thorough and go by the book, but she heard some compassion in his voice, "I'll have a checkup with Jean, I promise. I'm sure it's just exhaustion due to the ungodly hours I've been practicing. I completed the task and that should be what is important."
Storm looked back over to Scott, "She did do that, Scott. And we wouldn't have gotten the information as quickly without her."
Kurt, Storm and Hannah were all glaring at him waiting for a response, "Alright, but you check in with Jean or Henry the minute we get back."
"Of course I will." Hannah leaned back into the chair and closed her eyes.
It was late when they arrived back at the mansion but it was protocol for a debriefing so the professor met with them in his office. He was anxious to hear how Hannah had handled her first mission and was pleased to find out the mission was a success.
"Hannah's involvement allowed us to acquire the information in record time, Professor. Everything went according to plan." Scott looked over at Hannah. Although, she could not see his eyes, she knew that they disapproved of the information being kept from her father.
The professor was satisfied and felt a sense of pride. He had made the right decision concerning Hannah. Dismissing the others, Hannah remained in her father's office.
"Do you mind if I just type up the data. It will help me sleep, if I finally have it out of my system."
She could barely look him in the eye. Even though he couldn't read her mind, she knew how astute he was and he could possibly see her exhaustion. He would know the mission wasn't without its faults.
"Don't be too late; Graham expects punctuality in the morning. I don't think you want to be on his bad side this close to the concert."
"Of course not. It's first priority. Goodnight, Father."
He couldn't help but sense something else in her tone but pushed it out of his mind. She was tired. That was all. He gave her a smile before he headed for the door.
"Father…"
He slowly turned.
"Thank you. It means a lot to be to be apart of this."
"It means a lot to me too." He left her.
Hannah sat in his office transcribing Michael's file onto the computer. It wasn't the easiest task. Closing her eyes to recover the information was simple. It was getting it onto a document without mistakes. She still felt woozy and it was taking a lot longer than she had hoped.
Henry popped his head into the office, "Ororo said I would find you here."
"I'll be here all night, at the rate I'm going."
"Still feeling dizzy?"
"She told you."
"Hannah, you once told me to keep an eye out for you. That's what I'm doing."
Logan. He wanted Henry to keep an eye on her. The last thing she wanted to think about now was Logan.
"And you said I could take care of myself."
"Which you aren't doing. That information can be recorded tomorrow. It's not going anywhere." That was true. Hannah was good at storing everything away. It got easier. "I just want to check your vitals. A few minutes tops."
Hannah let out a sigh. "Alright."
She followed him down to the infirmary. He performed the usual. Checked her blood pressure, took her temperature, looked in her eyes, ears and mouth. Listened to her heartrate. He then asked questions.
"Ororo said you were getting serious with the piano teacher."
"Graham. And it's not serious. I'm not sure what it is."
"So you've been intimate?"
She was shocked, "Henry, what does that have to do with anything?"
"I'm afraid it could possibly have to do with quite a bit."
"No. We haven't been intimate."
He scratched his chin, "Your vitals are perfect."
"See, I'm fine."
"You are having bouts of nausea and dizziness, Hannah."
"I'm tired."
"When was your last period?"
"Really, Hank, this is fruitless."
"So you can tell me when your last period was?"
She began to think about it. "Well, not exactly. My schedule is crazy, it stirs things up. I'm not regular."
He reached into a drawer and pulled out a small stick and a urine cup. "Could you urinate for me? Just one more test, make sure everything is as it should be."
"What kind of test?"
He was quiet and looked at her serious, "Pregnancy. Let's rule it out right away."
"But I told you I'm not having sex."
"But you have been sexually active within the last few months."
"No, Henry. I'm not pregnant."
"You're not on birth control." He skimmed through her records, "And condoms aren't always full proof."
Hannah thought back to her encounters with Logan. A condom was never used. What was she thinking. She bit her lip, "Oh, my god, Henry. I can't be." She felt the wave of dizziness float over her and swayed slightly. Henry went to her side.
"Let's check it out before we get all worked up about it. There's no point in worrying about something that may not be."
She reluctantly took the cup and headed for the bathroom. A whole new set of emotions accompanied this possibility. Graham, the piano, the mission…they had all been mere distractions. Logan remained a constant thought during everything and now there was the chance she was carrying his child. It would be a reality. And one she wasn't quite sure she was ready to face.
Logan sat in the smoky filled club, a whisky in hand. It was nearing 3AM. There was always plenty going on. Women, drinking, gambling, fights. It was better than being back at the apartment avoiding Yukio's advances or trying to sleep. He was beginning to spend most of his nights out, arriving back at the apartment in the early morning hours just to get Amiko ready for school. He knew this wasn't working. He was normally so good at moving on but this time it was different.
Slugging back his drink, number 21 he figured, he watched the clubs' regulars enjoying another night of reckless living. It was at times like these he would give anything to be normal and experience the numbness a night of excessive drinking could bring you. That wasn't about to happen. He slapped down a tip on the table and sauntered out of the place with the same thoughts he had sauntered in with. How was Hannah coping? What occupied her thoughts on a day to day basis? And more importantly, who occupied her thoughts. As he swung the door open he felt the humidity cling to him. Another sultry night in the city, another restless night on the uncomfortable couch. Lighting up a cigar, he took a long drag, wondering how long he could put up with this life.