Chapter 21

Mission: Pull A James Bond

(2 years ago)

Nadeshiko entered her daughter's room in Harper Academy, her dread nearly breaking her sanity to pieces. The school year started just fine. Nadeshiko remembered Sakura and her brother, Jake, getting ready for their respective schedules for the year a mere 2 months ago, the former screeching around trying to find her favorite pants and the latter hollering about unfinished papers. It was a normal, everyday scene… clothes scattered everywhere… the place in chaos.

Now, it was as if everything's starting to break.

She was running around the office a week ago, finishing her duties and dreaming of her warm bed, when her phone rang with the principal of Sakura's school on the other end. The news he brought her jolted her out of the world of deadlines and clients.

"Mrs. Kinomoto, I presume?" he asked in a serious and grave tone.

"Yes?"

He went straight to the matter. "Your daughter, Sakura Kinomoto, was found in a… delicate… state this morning. She tried to commit suicide by overdose. She's now in the hospital in the ICU. Please come immediately."

After bypassing 3 red lights, nearly running down a police officer and a string of curses, here she was, staring at her daughter's room, and even though she had barely looked at it as carefully as recommended, she knew that something was wrong.

Everything seemed so out of place. The place was too… clean.

Immaculately freakishly clean, she thought uneasily, staring around the room and taking a step inside. She examined the walls and noted that the posters of RnB singers and the movie 'Pirates of the Caribbean' were nowhere to be found. The dresser was bare except for a Bible and a rosary, which was very unsettling in itself. When had Sakura become so religious? What about the barrettes and hair pins? The bedsheets were free of any wrinkles and creases. It was as if someone had run over it with an iron and a ruler.

She gingerly lifted the mattress and found practically every junk food and chocolate wrappers known to the planet. Hersheys… Cadbery… Musketeers… Cheetos…

Sifting through the pile, Nadeshiko found the key to find whatever the problem is with her daughter: her journal.

Pushing aside a tiny trickle of guilt, she began to read… and 3 hours later, she was glad and scared she did.

O—o—O

In the more hidden grounds of RSU, 2 hulking rocks—no, BOULDERS—mysteriously appeared beside a fountain of a woman. At a glance, they may SEEM like boulders, but if you look closer, you'll see the fidgeting movements, the curses and hisses and the smacks accompanied with a "do not swear!" and a reply of "like hell I won't!".

Scratch that, you won't have to look closer. Anyone with half a brain can see that said two boulders were actually 2 grown men who were on a secret mission, so to speak.

"Ow! Good Lord, you're heavier than a pack of elephants! Get your elbow out of my face!"

"Get your face out of my elbow, you freaking tub of lar—OW! QUIT THE POKING!"

"Close your mouth and never swear! I am not going to put up with you when I can be inside the administration building trying to find the thing we were looking for!"

"I'll swear if I want to!"

"Keep focused, idiot!"

"Oh, yeah?" Fatty shot back. "YOU wanted to buy donuts at the Starbucks down the road! Heeellloooo, is that what we were looking for? Freakin' donuts?"

"Oh, shut up."

"Um, exactly what are looking for, anyway?"

"The videotape or cd! It's in the administration building which is right there!"

"It's this way, you doofus! Are you blind? It says so right here!" Fatty hissed. His large head was covered in an army cap decorated with leaves and his clothes were greenish gray, his right hand jabbing at the map he was holding.

"Right," the other one, Eggy, who was also wearing the army clothes (although his was decorated with roses and carnations), scoffed derisively. "You're absolutely retarded, brother of mine, it say so right here," he pointed at the far left of the map, "that the administration building is the one on the left of us!"

"No, it's the one on our right, idiot!"

"Left, you imbecile."

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Righ—Argh! Quit poking me, you seaslug! I swear that if your pet Woofie dies, I will NEVER attend the funeral!"

"Ha! If YOUR cat Bubba died, I won't attend the funeral, but I'll send a letter saying how it should BE YOU inside the casket instead of your pet!"

The two made to grab each other's necks but, obviously neither had one, so they settled on pinching the other's triple chins and rolled out of their pathetic hiding place and into the pavement, where a patrolling officer can catch them and sic his hungry guard dog on the brothers.

But, unfortunately or fortunately, there were none… yet.

They probably would've succeeded on going to heaven courtesy of the other when Eggy, who was currently being suffocated to death under Fatty's immense weight, cried out, "MMMpppptttfff!"

"What?" Fatty demanded, still pinching his brother's neck (and vice versa). "What the hell are you saying?"

"MPPPPFFFTTTTDDSSS!"

"WHATTT?"

Eggy finally released one hand from Fatty's triple chin and pointed behind them. Fatty narrowed his eyes. "As if! I'm not stupid cause I know what you're doing! You're saying there's a ghost behind me and when I look back, you'll pull my hair!"

Rollling his eyes, Eggy finally gapsed out, "you have no hair, you ignoramus! ADMIN!"

"WHAT?" At those words, Fatty looked around…. and cursed. They released each other and stared... at the lovely ivy-draped red building (right behind the fountain of a woman) that had a huge sign with the words "ADMINISTRATION BUILDING".

The brothers were silent for a minute.

Then, Fatty spoke up, "well, at least I'm 30 feet more accurate then you are."

"Raphael?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

"Aye aye, cap'ain."

OoOOoOo

With the use of a skeleton key owned by Fatty, ("Where in the world do you use—wait, I don't want to know," Eggy exclaimed) they entered the administration building with ease. While Eggy was busy muttering over how many germs are on his clothes, Fatty stretched and asked, "Okay, so what's so important about a video tape? Because, you know, we can always buy DVDs at the mall."

Eggy scowled and huffed, "oh honestly, I would've thought you're familiar with this, being a famous director and all that, but it seems I overestimated your coconut! The school has one of the finest security systems in the world, right?"

"Yes…"

"And so, obviously, I bet even the shadiest places in the campus, even the make-out spots and the place where Sakura was abducted has a hidden camera in position, recording everything from morning until night! So, if we get it and if Jake is ever convicted and the little pig lies, we have proof!"

Fatty whistled and started walking, "so James—"

"Jake."

"—I mean, Jake, was either too stupid or too overconfident to remember that tiny detail."

"Exactly."

"Excellent."

"Thank you."

"I wasn't talking about you. I was referring to Jake's obvious stupidity."

Eggy puffed out his chest and glared at him, muttering quietly, "Funny, really funny."

"Thank you, I briefly considered a career in acting, did you know? So anyway, where's the video room whatsits?"

"Well," Eggy pulled out the map of the inside of the building and pored over it ("Where the hell do you get all those maps?"). "I think… where where where… hmmm… video roooomm, whheeerreee are yoooouuu--HEY!" he yelled when Fatty suddenly snatched the map out of his hands and looked at it himself.

"You're slower than a halfwit, halfwit. Keep quiet, by the way. The guards will hear your pitchy voice," Fatty said cheerfully and continued walking and looking at the map.

Eggy's eye twitched. "Fine," he huffed and followed.

"So… we're in the ground floor and its… oh, seriously…"

"What?"

"It's in the top floor."

"Cripes."

(somewhere between the 2nd and 3rd staircase…)

"How… (pants)… many… (pants)… more left?" Eggy near-wailed beside Fatty, who was in no better shape and perusing the map.

"Just… (puff)… 3 … goddammit… (puff)… more staircases!"

3 staircases later

The two practically tumbled onto the landing, nearly yelling "ALLELUJAH!"

Fatty grinned triumphantly after gaining back his strength and said, "ah! At last! Now let's go, my dear brother and—hey, bro? Hello? You still there?" He frowned and, crouching down beside the supine form, waved a hand in front of his brother's red face. "Dear God, and he proclaims he exudes sexiness!" Fatty muttered.

Hearing that, said brother regained his strength. Bracing himself, Eggy glared at his brother and stood up, announcing, "for you information, I'm fit as a fiddle, ready to go and I DO EXUDE SEXINESS!" With that, he grabbed Fatty's hand and commanded, "Now, tell me where is the room!"

"Right," Fatty announced and, walking, he muttered, "it says here that the door should be somewhere right… no, wait, it's here… somewhere right… here!" He let out a suppressed whoop and stood beside the door, puffing out his chest and looking smugly at his brother. "How's that for smart?"

Eggy just stared at the door… and then back again at his brother's face and demanded, "are you playing stupid or are you just plain daft?"

"What did I do, you ungrateful—!"

"This is not the room we're looking for, you prat!"

Fatty glared at him, hands on hips. "What the heck are you—this is it! Can't you see the sign that says," he whirled around and jabbed at the big bold letters on the door, "Welcome to the… to the… oh crap…"

Eggy continues his sentence and sarcastically said, "…broom closet! Dear heaven, let me see that, thank you!" he snatched the map out of Fatty's hands and skimmed it again. Five minutes later, his eyebrows went up to his hairline, his face red.

"What?" Fatty asked defensively.

"You absolute parrot."

"WHAT?"

"You were holding it sideways! SIDEWAYS, MY GOD!"

"Oh. Oops."

"Oops is right. I should feed you to my goldfish."

OoOoO

Needless to say, they doubled back and found the video room beside the entrance (yes, beside the entrance) and entered. It was a big room, with hundreds of cabinets, files and records, racks and tapes scattered everywhere. In the far side was a giant TV screen and a player propped on a mahogany table decked with 2 comfy chairs, a startling and clean contrast to the scattered objects.

The video room houses all the records of important or significant events held in the school since the day it started. So, considering that day was more than a hundred years ago, it was quite a lot. Ranging from Elvis Presley's appearance in a dance party to Dwight Eisenhower coming over for business, the brothers' hands were quite full.

And, oh yeah, every video taken by the hidden cameras everyday would be kept inside until such time that it would be viewed by the security guards, which was usually 2 days after the day it was recorded. Eggy, in all his wisdom, decided that the officers were dumb for not viewing it immediately and decided to do it himself.

Of course, Fatty has to come along, since, you know, they love each other so much that they must rescue Sakura (and their future nieces) together by busting Jake's ass via video.

"Where's the guy in the chair?" Fatty whispered, walking around and leaning on the window at the right.

"What?"

"You know, the supposedly bald cranky old guard man that watches all these stuffs and reports practically nothing since nothing exciting has been recorded for the last 50 years?"

"Hm, maybe he had LBM. I honestly don't care. Now, where do we start?" Eggy thought out loud, looking around. "Maybe we should start here." He pointed at a cabinet marked 'Videos 8/1/1850—6/29/1890'

"Are you insane? Those videos were taken practically during the time the school started! 1850? Heck, our great great great great grandma's grandma probably wasn't even born yet! It'd take us until year 2850 before we find it!"

Eggy ignored the insult and sniffed, "well, at least they marked it chronologically. Okay, you go to the left and try to find the videos from yesterday while I look here."

Together they started looking ("AH! They recorded Angelina Jolie's visit last year! Can I take it?" "No! KEEP LOOKING!")… and looking ("Hey, this is MY visit at the Fashion Department!" "You looked so stupid then, you know")… and looking ("Ha! Here's MY visit at the play of 'Romeo and Juliet!")… until Eggy found it.

"AHA!" Eggy exclaimed triumphantly, upper body coming out of a cabinet and waving a disc in the air.

Ignoring his brother's 'as if', he dragged him towards the TV and proceeded to put the disc into the player. They turned the TV on and as the player hummed to life, they sat and watched.

The screen flickered to life and showed a pathway.

"You got the wrong tape! The only thing moving is a squirrel!"

"No, I did not! Just wait!"

And surely enough, a minute later, a lone figure walked—skipped, actually, to the picture. Sakura was wearing a lopsided grin on her face, her hair on a bun and her right hand playing with a pencil.

"Her HAIR! HER HAIR IS A MESS!" Eggy exclaimed, horrified. "And shoes! Why isn't she wearing any powder? She just met Li, hasn't she? She looks like a boy--!"

"The heck, the girl had soccer practice, idiot!" Fatty hissed, "now, shut up and watch."

"Now, really, who are you to boss--!"

"Duh, I'm your older brother."

"You're my TWIN!"

"I'm 2 minutes older than you!"

"AS IF—SHHH!"

Eggy motioned for Fatty to turn off the TV and get the CD. They fell silent and listened.

Footsteps.

They exchanged panicked glances. "What are we going to do? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!" Fatty cried, wringing his (invisible) hair. "I'm too young to go to jail!"

"Quiet or he'll hear us!" Eggy snapped. "Maybe he'll go away…" The footsteps stopped outside the door. The knob started to turn. Fatty gulped, "maybe not!"

The door opened.

OOoOooO

Bob Krampus opened the door to the video room, his eyes scanning the room suspiciously. Adjusting his hold on the gun, he walked in. He was sure he had heard voices in here. Arguing as if there were no tomorrow. The room looked like how it was when he left it 4 hours ago, before his stomach started to do the chacha and LBM attacked. He heard the hoot of an owl. A very strange thing, since owls avoided this area since the caretaker, irritated at the hooting, blasted them with pink dye.

Wooo woooo. Woooo Woooo

He listened to the strange tones. Then, to his astonishment, a rather surprising one joined in.

Buck.. BuckbuckBACK… CuckooCuck—

"A rooster?"

Shaking his head, Bob wisely decided that his mind was playing tricks on him and went out of the door and into the bathroom as another wave of LBM attacked.

OoOoo

The Administration Building's flanked by 2 large trees. They were huge, about as tall as the building itself, with wide leaves and thick trunks, the branches with shadows that can fit quite nicely in a horror movie.

And today, the brother's were clinging to the thick trunk of the one on the left just below the video room window for dear life. Of course, even the prospect of plummeting to their death is forgotten when they argue.

"YOU IDIOT!" Eggy hissed at the man above him. "Of all the species of birds in the whole world, you had to pick a rooster! A CUCKOOING ROOSTER, BY GOD!"

Fatty glared at him through the gap between the trunk and his armpit. "Well, it was the first thing that came to my mind!"

"WHAT KIND OF DEMENTED ROOSTER WOULD CUCKOO HIMSELF HOARSE AT NEARLY MIDNIGHT?"

"Quit it! Your impersonation of an owl was hideous! In fact, I'm surprised they haven't attacked you now for degrading them!"

They were at the ground now and were walking towards the West Gate and their voices were getting louder, to their splendid obliviousness. Unfortunately, others weren't as unaware. Dogs have excellent hearing, did you know?

Growl.

The two brothers, still quite a distance from their freedom, froze.

Fatty, his eyes pleading, gulped and asked, "Micheal, my good man, I am hoping that's your stomach."

Grrroooowwwlll…

Eggy slowly shook his head, his face sweating. "Why, I thought that was you! The new one, was that from you?"

"Nope."

GGrrrooowlll…

"I take it that wasn't from the two of us?"

Together, they turned around and came to face three, hungry-for-some-fat mean-looking Labradors with teeth bared and saliva dripping. "And I thought dogs were cute," Eggy whimpered, and together they started edging away.

Since dogs were also smart, all hell broke loose.

OoOoOO

Li Meiling was about to pass by her school in her SUV, driving like a maniac with the intention of getting to Li's place and raising merry hell to tell them that Sakura's kidnapped.

Meiling, tell Yelan and Nade. Hurry! Tomoyo had said right before the three of them went to their own rescue.

When she was turning the corner near the West Gate, she nearly screamed when she saw two very familiar figures running like mad towards her car, their expressions both constipated and panicked.

They quickly passed by her, nearly flying with their speed.

She stopped and doubled back. Revving up her engine, she drove after the two. When they were in level with her, she rolled back the window and yelled, "NEED A RIDE?"

The two brothers snapped their heads to look at her, still running for dear life. Eggy was the first one to recognize her. "MEILING!" he exclaimed, his expression turning to joy.

Fatty was slower, but that was understandable.

They quickly got into the car and tumbled on the backseat. When they were stilly trying to be comfortably settled, Meiling turned to look at them. "I have never seen anyone run that fast. Spill."

Fatty gave her a weak smile and raised a small black disc. "We… we were trying to loose weight."

Eggy, on the other hand, did not reply and instead jerked his thumb behind, his expression pained.

Meiling's eyes followed and widened when, a split second later, 3 vicious-looking guard dogs appeared, obviously running after the two men on her car. When the animals finally ran past and disappeared, Eggy finally exclaimed, "I thought I was going to die!"

"Well," Meiling started, biting her lips. "At—at least you..erm… lost weight?"

A/n: So, um, yeah, that was a long chapter… long vacation… (coughs)… DON'T KILL ME! Yeah, I'm too young to die so what you should do is read and review… tell me if you like it… and listen as I say THANK YOU FOR EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED! R &R THIS ONE ALSO, OKAY?

Later and Lotsa Love,

CalCarrie

P.S. Eriol and Tomoyo are on the next chapter so look out for that!